


What Happens In The Jungle Stays In The Jungle

by FormulaFerrari



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Explicit Language, F/M, Interactive Fiction, Jenson is a Stud Muffin, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-19
Updated: 2014-05-24
Packaged: 2018-01-02 01:55:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 93,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1051170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FormulaFerrari/pseuds/FormulaFerrari
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the top five teams are sent to the Jungle, they don't have a clue what is in store for them.</p><p>Interactive Fiction so you decide what happens.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Pretext

So here is what you need to know. As this is an interactive Fic all of the decisions are down to you. Relationships (if any are wanted) and the rating will also be decided by you, which is why they have been left blank. The idea is that the Fic runs a lot like the show I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here and so you as the reader will decide who does the trials and, when we get to it, who gets sent home and who is crowned king of the jungle. I am following the 2013 show and so the trials will match if anyone is watching.

DISCLAIMER – I OWN NO RIGHTS TO I'M A CELEBRITY OR ITV, I AM JUST USING IT FOR INSPIRATION

Voting will work thus: The 'line' will be open for three days for you to comment on the end of the last chapter for who you want to do the bush tucker trial the next 'day'. I will post a comment once the voting must stop and any votes cast after my comment will not be counted. Who ever gets the most votes will be in the bush tucker. Votes should come in the form of this:

Button/Webber 

You may also add who you want to win the trail and I will take it into consideration - although this does not mean I will make it happen :P When voting comes to kicking people out of the jungle it should be formatted thus:

Rosberg

Please vote for the person you want to leave, as this will be easier for me when I am trying to work out a tally.

I plan to update every Friday to begin with, as I am juggling this with other projects and study, but this may become a bit more frequent if I have some free time. You will always be given three days to vote and the voting will close around 9:00pm UK time.

Please also feel free to leave comments suggesting what the camp mates get up to during the day and anything you want to see happening as, like I have mentioned before, the outcome of the Fic is up to you.

I think I've covered everything, so lets start ^_^

RED TEAM - CROC CREAK -  
Sebastian Vettel  
Fernando Alonso  
Jenson Button  
Kimi Raikkonen  
Nico Rosberg 

YELLOW TEAM - SNAKE ROCK -  
Mark Webber  
Felipe Massa  
Sergio Perez  
Romain Grojean  
Lewis Hamilton

The first day will be online shortly and you may begin to vote on THAT chapter.  
Please do not vote on this chapter. 

Thank you and I hope you enjoy this as much as I am anticipating writing it ^_^


	2. Day One/Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Drivers arrive at the jungle.

They had been put in pairs and whisked into helicopters. Fernando wasn't really sure if he had understood what the presenters had told him he was going to do, but from the looks of it they were, in fact, going to jump out of a helicopter. He breathed deeply as Sebastian climbed into the area at the back of the helicopter they would jump from. Two men were securing them to their torsos. Fernando tried to stay strong. He was a fighter and didn't want to look weak in front of the thousands watching him. 

Sebastian didn't like heights at the best of times and now he had to jump from a great one. What if the parachute failed? What if he wasn't secured to his guide tight enough? What if he crashed down to his death? He couldn't even his breathing. It was all too much. The man behind him asked him if he was OK as he handed him some weird plastic goggles. He had just nodded, fearing his voice would give him away. He was willing this to go well, anxiety building in his stomach. 

Mark was a little pissed Fernando was in the other helicopter. It seemed this Ant and Dec were already building a team of number ones and he was annoyed he wasn't on it. Felipe was very quiet. A lot quieter than Fernando. He kind of wanted him to speak so he didn't have to think about falling from a helicopter mere minutes away. Felipe was just chewing on his nails. How were they going to win this race with two determined winners on the other team? Mark was just glad this was held in Australia; at least he had a fair idea of the things that were around. 

Felipe felt sick. The thought of bugs, the thought of jumping from the helicopter, the thought of cold nights on a damp ground. He wasn't looking forward to any of it. He didn't want to go, but he had to. This stupid PR thing Bernie had thought would be fun. No fun at all. Not to him. The door shut, containing Mark and he to the small area and suddenly they were level with the treetops. He felt himself freeze. If it weren’t for the guy nudging him towards the doorway he would have clambered into the front and refused to leave. But now he was being told to open the door. The wind rushed into his face and he thought he was going to pass out. 

Fernando loved it. Wanted to do it again. Felipe didn't say much, just nodded and mutter something to himself that he thought was amusing. Seb was too glad to have his feet on the ground, pushing his hands deep into the sand and standing up, letting the handfuls trickle out of his hands. Mark couldn't get over the view. The best way to view Australia in his opinion. But then they were running. Felipe and Mark to the yellow banner and Fernando and Seb to the red. Fernando took the GPS for the red team and Mark for the yellow team. On the sound of the klaxon the four of them dashed down the sandy hill. Sebastian and Fernando seemed to be racing each other to the checkpoint and steamed off into the lead. Mark was getting annoyed at having to make sure Felipe was still with him. They were never going to win the extra night of luxury. 

Jenson walked into the clearing and sat on his wooden box, waiting for whoever would be meeting him there to arrive. He pulled off his shoes and changed into the boots that were provided, securing his water bottle around his waist tightly. He was on edge. The wind kept picking up the leaves and scattering them, making him sure he could see something running along the ground. He wanted someone to appear so they could distract him. He was scared of being bitten or getting hurt. The foreign creatures that he believed surrounded his feet were not what he was used to back in England. They were a lot bigger here. 

Sergio finally found the clearing after getting what he believed were very confusing instructions from cameramen. He wasn't sure if they were all doing it deliberately for good television or whether he really just didn't understand. When he finally got there he was glad to see Jenson. At least he knew he could understand him. He sat down harshly on his box and noted the Brit's skin looked a lot paler than usual. A few words were exchanged but before Sergio could really get the conversation going they heard a cheer. 

"Yes!" Seb shouted as Fernando looked over the interactive screen. "Number one, baby!" he held up his finger to Fernando who pushed it back into his fist. 

"Don't do that," Fernando panted, a little out of breath from the frantic running. He swapped places with Seb and picked up the red sash. 

"So who do we want? Jenson or Sergio?"

"How does Jenson hold up with bugs?" Fernando asked looking around to make sure the yellow team weren't about. They had a few minutes to decide. 

"I don't know, but he is a wiz in the kitchen,"

"Jenson it is then," Fernando confirmed and Sebastian nodded. They ran past the box and round to the clearing. Fernando was happy with the selection of Jenson, especially for this task; Jenson did triathlons and had to be good at running because of this. They shook hands as they arrived, explaining quickly to Jenson that it was a race and giving him his red sash. Jenson patted Sergio on the shoulder as they rushed away, leaving the Mexican alone. Around thirty seconds later Mark crashed into the clearing. Sergio was already on his feet. Mark turned and waited for Felipe to arrive, luckily that didn't take long and was happy when Sergio held his hand out for the sash and rushed back to get Felipe, yelling for Mark to go on and they would catch him up. Mark was a little pissed that now two people he wanted on his team were with Seb. This was becoming more and more like a Grand Prix each moment: everything going Seb's way. 

Kimi didn't care. Unsurprisingly. Romain was babbling on about some fear of his but Kimi wasn't listening. With his eyes hidden behind his sunglasses he was glaring at the cameraman. How long until they took them away? He had pushed his box back against a tree and had slouched down it with his arms folded. He had reluctantly changed his shoes. 

Romain couldn't decide if he was excited or petrified. The prospect of so many things was threatening to make him laugh or cry. It was so very odd that he was sat here in a jungle with his teammate. Nothing like what he usually did. But he knew the cameras would want something interesting and Kimi wasn't going to be any help with that. So he was talking, constantly; like a stream of consciousness. And now he was talking about his baby.

"First again! It’s a good feeling, no, Fernando?" Seb teased as they got to the next box in good time. Jenson opened the box as Fernando just shook his head at Seb. This wasn’t going to be easy without Mark. 

“Uh oh,” Jenson said, making both Fernando and Seb turn panicked. 

“What? We’re first, right? Their sash is still here!”

“Yes, Seb, we’re first, but we’ve got to pick from Lotus,”

“Kimi,” Seb said, without a hint of doubt.

“Do you really think Kimi will be helpful? We should pick Romain,” Jenson added.

“Kimi’s smart. Kimi isn’t fazed by anything,”

“And Romain is?”

“Not what I’m saying,”

“We need to make a decision now,” Fernando said, hitting them both with the sash in his hands as he saw a glint of yellow coming down the hill. 

“Rock paper scissors?” Jenson suggested. Seb nodded. 

“Make it quick,” Fernando hissed, impatience growing as he clearly heard Mark yelling to the rest of his team that he’d found the right way. Sebastian won, squashing Jenson’s scissors with his rock and as the Brit opened his mouth to argue Fernando rushed to the clearing. Romain smiled at him as he appeared but Kimi didn’t move. Jenson and Seb appeared shortly afterwards and with limited words from the Fin they were off again, leaving Romain only briefly as Mark swore seeing the red sashes disappear out of the clearing. But they had closed in. 

“Fuck sake, Kimi, come on!” Jenson yelled as he stopped for the third time. Seb stopped just in front of him and Fernando carried on, scrutinising the GPS. Jenson turned on Seb. “He’s going to loose this for us!” Seb rolled his eyes before running back towards Kimi. Jenson folded his arms waiting for Seb to reappear. But instead was greeted by a very fast moving Kimi Raikkonen. He fell into a run next to Seb. “What did you do?”

“Gave him an incentive,” Seb smiled. Fernando was already waiting for them when the three of them arrived at the last checkpoint, swinging the last red sash around in a bored fashion. 

“Took you’re time,” Fernando said as they all moved towards the box to see who they had to chose between. Mercedes. “And hey, Seb. I think I just beat you,”

“Because you weren’t worried about you’re team,”

“I was, I could have picked without you. Just admit it, I’m faster,”

“Bite me, Fernando,”

“Can you just pick? I want my champagne.” Kimi mumbled taking the sash from Fernando and revealing the incentive Seb had given him. Of course it was alcohol. 

“Let’s take Britney, I think he deserves another night of luxury. He can try and fix his hair so it never moves,” Jenson joked. 

“But Lewis is pretty good,” Seb imputed. Fernando rolled his eyes, they weren’t going to waste more time. 

Nico didn’t like this. Not one tiny bit. And Lewis was not being supportive at all, laughing at him every time he squeaked. The bugs were weird and he didn’t like it. And the thought of putting one in his mouth. Burgh! It made him feel sick. Lewis may have been laughing but it was to cover up his fear. At night, anything could happen. He just hoped he could get a zip lock bag and hid in it. He didn’t want to share his bed with any sort of creature. The two men looked up at Kimi appeared into their clearing. 

“Just you, Kimi?” Lewis asked, hoping the public would like the humorous front he was going for. 

“No.” Kimi muttered, folding his arms. Both Mercedes drivers looked up at him, hoping he would explain but he didn’t. They looked at each other. 

“So… what’s going on?” Lewis said, unsure of what else to do. 

“They are arguing. I got bored.”

“Arguing about?” Nico asked. Just then Jenson crashed into the clearing with Seb and Fernando in tow. 

“Kimi, give it to Britney! Britney, I hope you’re ready to run!” Jenson yelled, not stopping to exchange pleasantries. Kimi threw the red material at Nico and followed Jenson with Seb dashing after him. Fernando stopped to explain. 

“It’s a race. The other team is there. We have to run now. We want to-”

“-Hey, Fernando! Who is faster now?” Seb yelled back spurring Fernando to drop his explanation and dash after the German, catching Nico’s arm as he did so. Nico got the message. No sooner had Fernando and Nico began to run, Mark, Romain, Sergio and Felipe came crashing through. Felipe took one look at Lewis who was pulling on the yellow sash Romain gave him. 

“No.” Felipe started. 

“This is no time to argue, Felipe! Go!” Mark yelled and the five of them dashed of in pursuit of Fernando and Nico. All to their avail. Seb had nearly reached the bell when Fernando tackled him to the ground. Kimi was already in the boat and Nico happily turned and rang the red bell, watching the yellow team stumble to a halt. 

“Guess that one was a tie then, Seb?” Fernando smiled, getting off the German. He glared at Fernando. 

“No I won, I got here first,”

“Don’t act like a baby, Sebi,” Nico cooed as he climbed into the boat behind Jenson. Fernando stuck his tongue out and climbed it after, followed by a pouting Seb. Mark slowed to a stop by the bell and rung it as the red team sailed away. Fernando felt a little bad; he didn’t want to leave Mark in the jungle. He wanted him to come with them to the boat. That night wasn’t good for the yellow team, with Lewis and Felipe staying at opposite sides of the camp and taking the piss out of each other. Mark decided that tomorrow was going to be better. 

\- - -

This was not expected at all. The red team looked very well fed and rested compared to the yellow team, with Kimi appearing to be a little drunk though no one could really tell. And there was Ant and Dec looking clean and fresh. The big rotating table was the thing that was worrying them all. And the white board with the question mark on it. 

Once they were all strapped to the table and the rules were explain they each knew they would be up against their teammate and had to build the star puzzle quickest whilst being in a box full of any sort of creature. Some were scared, some weren’t sure, but Kimi couldn’t care less. Whoever was quickest would win a meal for their camp and the team with the most stars – out of five – would win the better camp. Mark and Seb were first.

Dec spun the wheel of misfortune and the creature that was selected to join them in the boxes was cockroaches. Seb squeaked as ten thousand of the little bugs were poured onto his stomach, but Mark had something to prove. On the sound of the klaxon they started. Mark kept his mouth in a thin, straight line preventing any of them from entering his mouth. He focused on building the star. Whereas Seb was having a little difficulty. As he had opened his mouth to moan that one had gone in his ear, one crawled across his lip and he screamed, dropping the star pieces. Mark finished the puzzle first and was cocky as they were released from their cockroach boxes. 

“No mulit-21 there, mate,” Mark joked, giving Seb a friendly push of the shoulder. 

“You’re Australian, you have the advantage,”

“Yeah, but I don’t spend all day rolling around with cockroaches,” Mark said, making Seb fall silent. Next it was Fernando and Felipe with snakes. Mark was in two minds because he wanted Fernando to win but he also wanted Felipe to because that meant another meal for the team and one step closer to the better camp. The klaxon sounded again and Mark watched as Fernando’s fingers moved swiftly from the puzzle to the pieces, building it up slowly. Felipe was moving dreadfully slowly in too much fear of the snake becoming interested in him. Mark noticed that Fernando was speaking rapid calm Spanish to the one hovering around his head and had to laugh to himself. Fernando easily won. It was one a piece. 

Jenson and Sergio had rats in with them, which for Jenson was lucky. Jenson knew what rats could do and found them more like entertaining fluffy balls than scary disease carriers. He happily petted one as they were being loaded into his box, much to the amusement of the others. Sergio was not so fond of the furry little creatures that rushed around him, but being brave, he gave it his best shot. Jenson beat him by a mere second because he couldn’t work out which way the penultimate piece went in. It was a respectable effort but Mark could just see two one. They couldn’t loose again. 

Romain froze. Totally and he couldn’t move. Everyone else had got things that couldn’t hurt and they had fucking scorpions. He was tempted to yell “I’m a celebrity, get me out of here,” but taking a shaky glance over to Kimi he knew he wouldn’t have to wait long. He was focused on the puzzle but every now and again he would stop to pick a scorpion off himself and place it down next to him in the box casually. Kimi won happily and one of the little scorpions became very attached to him and gripped to his shirt. He said that he didn’t care, they could leave it but the production team wouldn’t stop until he was scorpion-less. Three-one. The red team had won the better camp and had three meals. Mark willed Lewis to do something special so they at least had two meals and could have claimed the battle was close. 

Nico didn’t like the lizards. Jenson wanted one to keep because he claimed they were extremely cute. Ant made a joke about Formula One drivers having some kind of weird attachment to creatures and they all laughed. Apart from Kimi who had pushed his hat low over his face, not liking the fact he had no sunglasses. For the firsts few moments of Nico versus Lewis nothing happened. Nico was trying to shift the lizards off him and Lewis was wetting himself at his attempt. Lewis composed himself and managed to build the star rather quickly to the massive relief of Nico. Once all ten of them had done their challenge they were sent off to their respective camps to await dinner. Seb tried to push Fernando into another race on their way to the camp.

“First one to the camp gets to pick their bed?” Seb suggested to the four men walking with him. Everyone rolled their eyes at him. “Pick their spot by the fire?”

“Give it up, Sebi, no one wants to race,” a disgruntled Nico said, rapidly brushing his shoulder to get rid of the invisible and non-existent bug.

“You guys are no fun,” Seb exclaimed, falling into step behind Fernando.

“If you think about it, Seb,” Fernando started, beginning the decent to the camp. “You lost again,”

“What are you talking about?” Seb said, angered by Fernando’s accusation. 

“Well, you lost to Mark, so that’s one loss, and then I won mine, technically meaning I beat you again. So that’s another two wins to me,” Fernando teased. Seb fell silent, annoyed by Fernando’s logic that he couldn’t argue with. And even though they weren’t racing, Fernando made sure he was the one to lead them into camp, just in case Seb decided to bring it up again. 

The Croc Creak camp was massive and there was a lovely warm fire crackling away, already lit. Fernando couldn’t help but smile; it was very cosy and welcoming. The squashy, green mattresses were begging to be tried out and Kimi happily laid down on the closest one, bringing his hat off his head and covering his face. Sebastian ran up the hill and down again just to prove how much space they had, Nico dove into the supply box and began frantically rubbing insect repellent all over his body as Jenson began sorting through the cooking supplies. Fernando took a seat on the floor, rolling his fleece up and putting it between his back at the wooden log than was meant to be a bench. He just observed his fellow camp mates, hoping that Mark wasn’t suffering too much. 

Snake Rock wasn’t so pleasant. It was a lot smaller, the mattresses were thinner and the fire was not awaiting them. Apart from that they had the same living conditions and standards as the other camp. Mark made a make shift bed out of one of the mattresses and two ‘benches’ and laid down, trying to block out the sounds of the others arguing. It hadn’t been totally disastrous today; at least they were going to eat something decent rather than just beans and rice, but that didn’t stop Lewis from blaming Felipe. 

“It wasn’t difficult!” Lewis snapped, making Sergio jump and spray sparks on Romain as they were trying to light the fire. 

“It was not only me who lost. You cannot blame only me!”

“But if you had have won yours then we would be in the better camp!”

“Same for Sergio and Romain, no?”

“But I’m not talking to them!”

“So they will get this later?” Felipe challenged and Lewis shrunk a little. “Just admit you have a problem with me and that is what you are annoyed about,” Lewis scoffed.

“I don’t have a problem, man. That was years ago and I won, why would I have a problem?”

“Because you are sore looser,”

“I think you’ve started talking to yourself,”

“Oh, you do? Because I’m not the one having a go at you for loosing,”

“Because it’s your fault we lost!”

“GUYS!” Mark yelled, sick of the circular conversation. Everyone looked up at him, shocked. “Call it, alright? We’re a team whether you like it or not. We win together and we loose together. Stop blaming each other,”

“But-”

“-Don’t fucking start on me, Lewis, that would be a big mistake,” Mark said, looking over at the Brit. Everyone fell silent and finally Romain and Sergio got the fire going. They all crowded around it waiting for the food to arrive. Mark felt this wasn’t going to be as enjoyable as he first thought. Lewis and Felipe were still sending daggers at each other as they climbed into bed after having a surprisingly nice meal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first trial is  Monday Night Take Away  and the vote will be open until 9:00pm UK time on the 23nd November.


	3. Day Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even the Iceman can loose his cool

“Good Mornin’ Campers!” Ant called as Dec and he descended into the Red team’s camp. They were all sitting around the fire holding little mugs. Nico looked knackered as he tried to force his eyes to remain open, with Jenson sitting neck to him. Seb had been whispering in quiet to Kimi but they had stopped abruptly as the presenters entered the camp. Fernando looked very very bored. 

“As you know, we have come here to tell you who will be taking part in today’s buck tucker trial, Monday Night Takeaway,” Dec said. The drivers all looked around at each other, trying to work out what the trial might be. All apart from Kimi; he looked up in a bored manner at Ant and Dec. “The chosen celebrity will go head to head with a member of Snake Rock in a battle to win meals for camp,”

“So, in no particular order,” Ant said, bringing the attention back to them. The drivers fell silent. “Jenson,” Jenson looked frightened at the call of his name. He knew right now he would have a close up and so tried to look brave. Or as brave as he could. The silence after his name seemed to go on forever. Takeaway? That would definitely mean eating something. “It’s not you,” Relief rushed through his system as he smiled at Nico. But Nico didn’t return his smile and Jenson rubbed his shoulders. 

“Fernando,” Dec said. The placid Spaniard raised an eyebrow, holding Dec’s gaze and making him feel uncomfortable so the presenter looked down at his cards. “It might be you,” Everyone turned to face Fernando but all he did in response was lift the mug to his lips, taking a long swing of his tea. 

“Nico,” Ant said and the German visually began to hyperventilate. Jenson kept his hold on his shoulder but it didn’t seem to be helping. He had already worked out it wouldn’t be Nico; the second person was always left until last to be announced that it ‘might be them’. So it was of no surprise to Jenson when Ant said: “It’s not you,” Nico’s whole body deflated in relief as he relaxed and returned Jenson’s smile. 

“Sebastian,” Dec said and Seb held his breath. The small man paused again but for a lot longer than he had before and Sebastian frowned in confusion. Did that mean he was doing it? Did that mean he had to participate in Monday Night Takeaway? He didn’t want to. “It’s not you,” He released his breath he had forgotten he was holding and smiled, looking down in his lap and hiding from the cameras just exactly how relieved he was. 

“So, Kimi,” Ant said, turning to the Fin. “It could be you,” Everyone looked between Kimi and Fernando, although neither of the two of them were showing any signs of caring. They both still remained looking up at Ant and Dec. Jenson and Seb exchanged a look of confusion. 

“The public have decided the person they want to see play Monday Night Takeaway is…” Fernando was kind of anticipating playing this trial. The prospect of maybe getting to see Mark was in front of him and he could get out of this camp and go and do something. Kimi, per usual, didn’t care. Whoever went would fight very hard to win and Kimi knew that. He was apathetic whether it was Fernando or him. Seb was holding onto his arm tightly and Kimi rolled his eyes, knowing the cameras and the public would see but still not caring. They probably couldn’t see Seb’s hand so they probably thought he was rolling his eyes at the delay. 

“Kimi,” Dec finished and Seb gasped. The only audible reaction they got from the camp. Everyone looked at each other and then at Kimi. Kimi was indifferent. 

“So Kimi, we will see you down at the bush tucker trial area later,” Ant said and the two presenters headed back up the stairs and out of camp. Fernando got up and walked over to his bed, throwing the remainder of his tea into a nearby bush and sinking onto his bed. He didn’t care anymore; he just wanted to see Mark. 

“What do you think you will have to do?” Seb asked in a worried tone. He still had a tight grip on Kimi’s arm and didn’t want to let go. 

“He said ‘takeaway’ so I recon he will have to eat something,” Jenson said, having too much knowledge of this programme. He had always watched in it the past, cringing at what the poor celebrities had be subject to. He was relieved as hell he didn’t have to eat anything. 

“Well, at leas he’ll get some food,” Nico said enthusiastically. Jenson shook his head at his naivety. 

“It won’t be nice food,” Jenson said to Nico. Seb gripped onto Kimi’s arm tighter and Kimi winced at the pain. Seb didn’t seem to notice, but Kimi pried his fingers off of him and headed towards Fernando. He sought out the solace of someone who wasn’t trying to work out this trial. It suited him just fine that Fernando didn’t want to talk. They just lay side by side, looking up at the canopy of leaves. 

Over in the yellow camp things were still on the tipping point. Mark was doing everything he could to keep Felipe and Lewis away from each other and doing things that would prevent them from sparking off again. Romain had become the camps chef and was doing a mightily good job of making beans and rice taste a lot better than it should have done. Sergio, it seemed, was one to talk to himself a lot. He help Romain as much as he could with the cooking but every now and again the Frenchman would turn to his sue-chef thinking he was talking to him to hear him mumbling about something completely irrelevant. 

“Heads up,” Lewis called, dropping the wood he had brought for the fire. They all turned to follow his gaze and saw Ant and Dec descending into camp. Moving so they were sat round the fire, they waited for the presenters to reach them. Ant and Dec bounded happily into camp, holding those dreaded cards that would reveal that one of them was going to do something horrendous. 

“Good morning, Snake Rock. How was our first night in the jungle?” Dec asked, smiling round at then all. Romain and Sergio looked at each other awkwardly, Felipe and Lewis – who were sitting at opposite ends of the line – looked away from each other. Mark sighed. 

“Not bad, mate. Bed’s a bit leafy,” Mark joked and Ant and Dec smiled at him.

“As you know, we haven’t come here to make friendly conversation. The public have been voting for who they want to see face a member of Croc Creak in a head to head battle in the bush tucker trial ‘Monday Night Takeaway’” Ant finished. 

“What!” Lewis exasperated and the rest of his camp mates frowned at him. Lewis couldn’t believe the eating challenge was happening so early. 

“So in no particular order,” Dec continued, acting as if Lewis hadn’t spoken. “Romain,” The Frenchman looked up, trying to hide the fear in his eyes. He was breathing deeply, forcing himself to remain clam. Sergio caught his wrist and squeezed it encouragingly. “It’s not you,” Romain sighed in relief and smiled. 

“Lewis,” the Brit looked up at the presenters as Ant spoke. He was chanting Please don’t be me over and over in his head, with his eyes closed. Praying, just for one piece of luck in this jungle. “It might be you,” His stomach fell out at the bottom and he opened his eyes. He couldn’t. He couldn’t eat bugs and things. Just the thought of doing it made him feel sick. He saw Felipe’s grinning face out the corner of his eye. Felipe was grinning at his possible misfortune. Lewis’ jaw locked. He hoped it was Felipe who had to eat the bugs. 

“Sergio,” Dec said. Sergio turned to Romain who gave him a reassuring smile. The public wouldn’t have picked him. He hadn’t done anything during their first day. It would probably be between Felipe and Lewis. He took a deep breath. “It’s not you,” Sergio let a smile slid onto his face as he looked back at Romain who patted his leg. 

“Felipe,” Ant said, pulling the Brazilian’s attention away from Lewis. Lewis hoped that Felipe would be made to go and he watched the Brazilian’s face, hoping to see some kind of fear. “It’s not you,” Lewis frowned at the floor. Why wasn’t anything fair?

“Which means Mark,” Dec said, looking to the one Australian in the jungle. Mark just smiled at him like he had been expecting it. “It might be you,” Mark had been expecting it; he was Australian and was sure the public would want to see how he coped in the Australian jungle. Mark looked over to Lewis who exchanged a look of ‘good luck’ with him. Mark had a very good feeling that Lewis had nothing to worry about. “The public have decided that the person they want to see face ‘Monday Night Takeaway’ is…” Lewis swallowed. He knew if Mark went there would be more chance of them winning some meals but he didn’t want to force that fate on Mark. He didn’t want to do it himself, though and was happy to be selfish about that fact. 

“Mark.” Dec finished and Mark laughed, unsurprised. Lewis was relieved beyond anything he could have imagined. It also made him laugh to see the downbeat expression on Felipe’s face. “We will see you later at the bush tucker trial area,” Ant said and the presenters waved goodbye, disappearing back out of camp. Everyone embarked on a conversation about what they thought the trial would consist of. 

“Who do you recon you’ll be against?” Sergio asked after they decided that Mark was going to have to eat something revolting in his trial. Mark shrugged. 

“Could be any of them, really,” Mark said. He was in two minds about whether or not he wanted it to be Fernando. It would be great to see him again and it would be great to beat him. But he wasn’t sure he would be happy with himself for taking meals away from him. 

“It’ll probably be Nico, he’s not really up for bugs,” Lewis commented.

“A walk in the park for you then, for sure,” Felipe said to Mark with a smile.

“There’s no ‘for sure’ about it,” Lewis said, mimicking Felipe. 

“Don’t start again,” Romain said, rubbing his fingers against his temples. Everyone looked at him. He opened his eyes a little shocked to be the centre of attention. “What? It was bad enough last night. We’re a team and it’s not going to work if you two can’t just man up,” Sergio sat awkwardly beside Romain, not really sure what to do. Felipe got up and walked away, heading down to the creak and away from the others. Mark sighed and lent back as Sergio got up, implying he was heading towards Felipe.

“No, let Lewis go,” Mark said, looking over at the Brit. Lewis opened his mouth to argue but seeing Mark’s expression he just rolled his eyes and got up, following the Brazilian’s footsteps. Romain leant his hand on his chin and exasperated. 

“You know they are just going to get into an argument,” Romain said, turning his eyes to Mark. 

“Well hopefully they can get it out of their system and move on.”

A few hours passed and Mark was finally called to go to the bush tucker area. The walk to the trial was slow and he thought briefly that he had got lost. He could swear he was walking round in circles and he couldn’t find the bridge he needed to cross. Kimi skulked down the small slop and saw the table before he saw the presenters. He wanted so badly to take his seat but he had to wait for his challenger. The presenters had their first experience at trying to interview Kimi. 

“So Kimi, what’s life like in camp?” Ant asked. 

“Alright.” Kimi answered, folding his arms. 

“How are the others? Any friction in camp?” Ant tried again. 

“No.”

“Err… So how was the first night? Was the food good?”

“I was asleep.” Kimi said, looking bored and watching a bird fly above his head. Ant and Dec exchanged a confused look.

“Alright, well, do you want to see who you are up against?” Dec asked and Kimi shrugged. Mark descended into the area and Kimi let a smile fall onto his face. He had some idea that the public would vote Mark into the trial. Mark moved over to Ant and Dec and shook their hands respectively. He did the same to Kimi, who appeared to be a little happy to see Mark. 

“You couldn’t have hidden this any better, mate,” Mark commented, falling into his spot next to Kimi. “I feel like I’ve been walking round for hours trying to get here,”

“That was the beginning of the trial, to get here,” Ant joked. 

“Great, so I can go back to the safety of camp now?” Mark asked in a similar tone to Ant. 

“Once you’ve finished the task, yeah,” Kimi said, shocking the presenters that he could actually say more than three words at a time. “Nice shirt.” Kimi said, taking in Mark’s yellow vest with an open blue short-sleeved shirt. The combination looked ridiculous and Kimi massively preferred his dark green and red combo.

“Thanks, I think I make the colour work,” Mark joked, striking a pose. Kimi smiled obviously, shocking the presenters for the second time that day. 

“Ok, so now you’re here, Mark, why do you think the public chose you?” Dec asked.

“I don’t know, probably cause I’m an Aussie, so this is kind of my turf. They want to see how I handle what you can throw at me on it,” Mark suggested.

“Kimi?”

“I don’t know.” They paused for a moment but Kimi didn’t elaborate.

“Why don’t you take a seat and we’ll explain the rules,” Ant said and Kimi fell into his chair with a face full of liberation. Mark sat down in front of him and had to resist the temptation to laugh at the Fin’s relief at sitting down. “Today’s trial is called ‘Monday Night Takeaway’ and during your time here you will visit five shops.”

“Each shop has one dish that you must eat, each dish is worth one meal for camp but the winner of the trial will take all the meals they win back to camp and the loose will get nothing.” Dec continued. 

“Its winner takes all, but you can pass on a dish or not finish it. If you do one of these things you will not win the meal.”

“You must completely swallow the dish and show us you mouth is empty before you can have a drink.”

“In the event of a tie there will be a tie breaker.”

“Is everything clear?” Dec finished and the two drivers faced him. 

“As it will ever be, mate,” Mark said, placing his water bottle on the table. Kimi just nodded in a nonchalant way; as if this was the sort of thing he did every day. 

“Ok, if you are both ready, please make your way over to the Wicked Wok to get your first dish,” Dec said and the two drivers got themselves up. Mark couldn’t help but laugh at the name, trying to keep himself calm. He could do this. He could just pretend that it was something totally different when he put it in his mouth. Kimi and himself picked up their dishes and walked back over to the table, sitting down and Mark looked at his closed box sceptically. 

“Now, if you both open up your boxes and you can see what you have got,” Ant said. Kimi pulled the lid open and tilted the box towards him, taking in the contents. Mark hesitated, trying to see in Kimi’s reaction what was in the box but the Fin gave him nothing unsurprisingly. Mark took a deep breath and looked down at the small brain thing sitting on a bed of noodles. How the hell was he going to pretend that was something other than it was? “Your first dish is Pork Chow Brain,” 

“What the fuck is that?” Mark said, a small sense of appal in his voice.

“Pig’s brain,” Ant said as it if were the most normal thing for the two of them to be presented with.

“And we have to eat the whole thing?” Mark said in a shaky voice. Dec answered him. 

“Just half. Break it in half with your fingers and then you just-”

“-Eat half a pig brain,” Kimi said as Mark tipped the box towards him and wrinkling his nose at it. Kimi was watching him, wondering what he was going to do. 

“Kimi, you will tackle this dish first,” Ant said and the Fin picked the brain up in his hands and broke it in half, appearing unfazed. He looked at the weird, white brain for a few moments before averting his gaze to Mark and popping the entire thing in his mouth. 

Just keep chewing. He was mentally egging himself on; if he stopped then the taste would be something he could focus on and he would probably spit it out. He held Mark’s eye as he chewed, focusing on his need to beat the Australian. The thing in his mouth he was chewing was soft like chicken but with a livery texture. He didn’t focus on it. He just kept chewing. Holding Mark’s eye and hoping his coolness would faze him somewhat. He swallowed and opened his mouth, showing the presenters it was empty. He turned and held Mark’s eye again. One down. 

“Well done, Kimi. You can have a drink now,” Ant said but the Fin didn’t move for his water bottle. Even though more than anything he wanted to try and wash away the taste that was starting to rise from his throat he tried to make Mark believe he had found that easy, too easy. “So what did it taste like?”

“Unusual.” Kimi said, not looking away from Mark. But Mark wasn’t looking at him anymore; his attention had slipped to his own brain. 

“Thanks, mate. That’s really helpful,” Mark laughed and broke his own brain in half. He took one last look at Kimi who was still wearing a bored expression just as he had done throughout eating his brain. Mark took a deep breath and ate the whole thing in one go. Luckily, as he chewed, nothing gooey spurted from the thing so he managed not to be shocked by it. It tasted weird because he expected it to be porky but it was nothing of the sort. He couldn’t get his mouth to salivate though so it was difficult to swallow. He caught Kimi’s eye again as he swallowed and showed him his empty mouth. As Kimi saw the brain half had disappeared he lent down and picked up his bottle taking a swing and spitting into a nearby bush. He tactic had not fazed Mark. Mark smiled and showed the presenters his empty mouth. 

“Ok, that’s good, Mark. So how was that for you?” Ant said as Mark reached for his water bottle. 

“That wasn’t nice. It’s definitely not what you expect it to taste like and the texture is a combination of too many things to describe.” Mark said, opening his bottle. 

“So that is a meal up for grabs for both of you,” Dec said as Mark washed out his mouth. “If you’re both ready then could you please make your way over to the Foul Fish Shop,” Mark looked at Kimi and it was clear that neither of them really wanted to go on. Reluctantly, they both got up and collected their next dish. They were both fighters and were not prepared to give up. Mark looked distrustfully at the yellow polystyrene container he placed on the table as he sat down. “Mark, you’ll go first on this one so if you’d like to open the box and see what you’ve got,” Mark looked at Kimi who was looking too relaxed with the prospect of what they may have to eat next. He pushed back the lid and felt his eyes grow wide. 

“You have got to be kidding,” Mark stated. Kimi looked over at Mark confused. Seeing the Australian wasn’t going to make things any clearer about what they had to eat next, he opened his own box and wished he hadn’t.

“Next you will be enjoying sausage and chips,” Ant said in a tone that was too joyous. Mark looked up at him. 

“And the sausage is really…?” Mark pressed. 

“Ostrich penis,” Ant smiled. 

“We have to eat the whole thing?” Kimi said, his voice finally cracking and showing his discomfort at the situation. 

“If you pull on the cocktail stick then you will see how much you have to eat,” Dec replied, finally happy to get a coherent sentence out of the Fin. Mark pulled his own cocktail stick and noted that he felt this was too much of the ostrich penis to be going anywhere near his mouth. He looked at the presenters for confirmation to go. “So you’ve just got to eat that bit, Mark, and then you win another meal for camp,”

“Possibly,” Mark added and, without thinking twice, placed the whole piece in his mouth. Instantly he wanted to spit it out. It was hard and disgusting and the taste was horrific. Trying to think of it as anything else? The only apt replacement he could come up with was a rubber and the reasons behind why that would find its way into his mouth didn’t help him. He chewed consistently, trying his hardest to think of anything else. Just a few more chews and it would be mushy enough to swallow. The taste edged down his throat and he forced his mouth shut, feeling the gags trying to roll through him. He coughed against his tight lips, his body seeking some kind of relief. Finally he swallowed it and showed his mouth was empty, diving for his water bottle as soon as it was confirmed. 

Kimi didn’t want to do it, but he had to. He decided that fazing Mark wasn’t going to work and so he closed his eyes and tried to think about anything else. The texture was wrong and the taste was unbearable. But he kept his face relaxed and normal, focusing on how all of this work was going to result in meals for camp. Because he was going to beat Mark. He had to. He swallowed and opened his eyes at the same time as his mouth. 

“Well done the pair of you, that’s another meal for camp,” Dec said as Kimi took another swing from his bottle and spat into the bushes again. “How was that?”

“Bad.” Kimi said, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. 

“The texture was all messed up, mate. You’re trying to think of anything else, but the texture is incomparable. Mark finished, taking another long swing of his drink. He never wanted to think about eating that again. He hoped that that one would be the worst. 

“You’re next stop is Curry Frights, so if you would like to get your next dish…” Kimi was very tempted to say no in reply to Ant but felt that might seem like he was forfeiting the rest of the challenge. Mark and he walked over to the next stand and brought back to large and heavy blue boxes. The heaviness worried Mark; he didn’t really want to lift the top off this one. “Ok, Kimi, you’re first,” Kimi lifted the lid and was caught surprised by the large foot in front of him. Not that he let it show, though. “Bunion Bhaji,” Ant continued and Mark revealed his own foot. 

“It is?” Kimi asked, looking at Mark who seemed to loose all ability to speak. 

“Camel toe,” Dec replied and Kimi gave one sharp nod. He pulled on the cocktail stick and looked at it, making sure Mark could see how little they had to eat of the disgusting thing. Not that that was going to make it easy but at least Mark seemed to have a little colour back in his face. The Australian took another swing from his bottle and swallowed deeply. “You just have to eat the fleshy white bit,” Kimi gave the presenters a disbelieving look. Did they really think describing it as ‘fleshy’ was going to make it any easier to eat? He turned back to Mark and put the wretched thing in his mouth. He would have preferred it if someone had given him a lump of fat to eat because that is exactly what he felt like he was doing. It had no flavour to it. It was just atrocious. He wasn’t surprised when he started gaging. 

“Just keep it in for a little bit longer. You have to swallow it or it won’t count,” Ant said as Kimi threw a hand over his mouth. He didn’t want to swallow, but he had to. The torture would end quicker if he swallowed. He presented his empty mouth to the presenters as he groped for his water. Mark looked at his own cocktail stick as if it were laced with poison. 

“Is easy.” Kimi said after washing out his mouth. A small smile crept onto Mark’s lips but he still didn’t look like he was getting any closer to putting it in his mouth. 

“Just count yourself into it,” Dec said. Kimi took it as a cue. 

“One, two, three,” Kimi said across to Mark and as he said ‘three’ Mark pushed the horrible substance into his mouth.

“Fuck me, Kimi, how in the hell-?” Mark’s question was cut short as he gaged, throwing both hands over his mouth. Kimi felt sorry for Mark; he knew how hard it was to try and keep this stuff down. Mark was struggling; tears were forming in the corner of his eyes and it was against every bodily instinct to not spit it out on the floor. There was nothing. He nearly gave up. 

“Just swallow it, Mark, and then is gone,” Kimi encouraged. Mark was a little astounded that Kimi was broadening his caring radius out to Mark and he held onto his words. Kimi was right, he just had to swallow it and then it was gone. It was hard to swallow thought because in his impatience to get rid of it he hadn’t fully chewed it. Finally and with a big gasp for breath, he opened his empty mouth. 

“Well done, that’s now three apiece,” Ant said.

“Don’t even ask me how it was because you won’t be able to air it without bleeping the whole thing,” Mark said, holding a hand towards the presenters and drinking a slow mouthful of water. 

“That bad?”

“You have no idea.” Kimi replied. 

“OK, so onto dish number four,” Ant could see that neither of the drivers wanted to continue, but the rules were the rules and one of them had to win. “If you could make your way over to Un-Uppa-Thai-Sing,” he gestured to the next kiosk and Mark rolled his eyes at the pun. It was a smaller, circular box that they came back with but that didn’t make Mark more enthusiastic about having to eat it’s contents. 

“Are they just going to keep getting worse?” Mark asked, willing his voice not to break. This was truly one of the most difficult things he had ever had to do. 

“Why don’t you open it up and find out,” Ant said with that sadistic smile. Mark took a deep breath and took off the lid. He didn’t understand at first because he couldn’t work out what it was hidden under the pancake. 

“Holy shit.” Kimi said from the other side of the table as he extracted the scorpion from its doughy shell. Mark’s eyes widened. No fucking way. 

“This is a Crispy Sting Roll,” Dec said, his happiness at the driver’s reactions too clear in his voice. This was the purpose of the programme and he was so happy they were both finally coming to terms with it. “You have to eat the entire scorpion,” Mark swallowed and Kimi and he exchanged a look of panic. 

“Can I leave it in the pancake?” Mark asked, already knowing the answer would be no. 

“No, you’ve got to take him out and eat him,” Dec said. The use of ‘him’ made it harder for Mark as he pulled the scorpion free and just looked at it for a moment. It’s claws looked sharp and the prospect of having to eat that was very unappealing. He looked at it’s body and presumed that it would crunch, which made it seem a little more appetising as everything else they had had to eat was soft. What worried Mark the most was it appeared to have some kind of gooey stuff in the middle that he assumed would squirt out as he bit his teeth into it. Seeing Kimi sitting wide eyed in front of him made him push the tail over the body and placed the little scorpion in his mouth, determined to not stop chewing. 

He was right; it was very crispy. That made for a nice changed on the texture front. And he was relieved that nothing squirted into his mouth. He had to keep moving it around his mouth as a sharp part came close to scrapping on the inside of his cheek. Each little leg gave a satisfying crunch that made Kimi wince. As he continued to chew, the taste changed. What he had assumed would squirt into his mouth suddenly became known and it had a texture of a spread. It was nice to give the crunchy body some kind of taste and it reminded him of marmite. 

“It’s not so bad once you get past the claws,” Mark commented, getting a small laugh from the two presenters. He strangely began to enjoy the taste in his mouth, probably down to it being so easy to relate to something normal. Marmite on toast. Mark happily swallowed what was left in his mouth and showed the presenters. 

“Well done, Mark. That’s four out of four for you,” Ant said and Mark smiled taking another swig of his water. Just one left. “So, your saying it got better towards the end?”

“It wasn’t too bad at all, mate. It had quite a nice taste,” he turned his attention to Kimi. “You’ve just got to not think about what you’re eating. It’s the prospect of what you’re doing that makes it harder I think,”

“Easier said,” Kimi muttered before swiftly pushing the scorpion, curled the same way Mark had curled his, into his mouth. He thought of it like a crisp, the crunching sound that accompanied each chew fitting well with this thought. But it did become easier. Kimi relaxed and looked over to Mark. “Has changed,”

“Yeah, it starts to taste like-” Mark started, but Kimi finished his sentence. 

“-Like Marmite,” Kimi said and Mark nodded. “Is not so bad,” 

“It’s really not,” Mark said, turning to the presenters. “You should try one, mate,”

“No. Nope, I think we’re alright,” Dec said defensively. Mark had a feeling the pair wouldn’t last five minutes on their own programme. Kimi happily swallowed the rest of the scorpion and revealed his empty mouth. 

“OK, Kimi. So that is four for each of you,” Ant said as Kimi turned back to Mark. 

“I think this will be easy to win,” He said. 

“For me, yeah. I’m not going to give up,” Mark countered. 

“We shall see,” Kimi added, folding his arms and looking up at the sky, appearing bored. 

“You’re last meal is an Italian dish,” Dec said, bringing both the drivers back to the competition.

“Oh, Fernando and Felipe should be doing this one,” Mark joked, referring to the Italian tie of both the Ferrari drivers. Kimi remained looking bored. 

“If you would like to make your way over to the Screaming Tower of Pizza we can see how easy it is going to be to win,” Ant said as, for the final time, Mark and Kimi got up and headed over to the last kiosk. 

“I bet this will be the worst,” Kimi muttered to Mark as they both collected their dishes in foil takeaway containers. 

“Then may the best man win,” Mark muttered back, getting a firm nod from the Fin. They both retook their seats.

“Kimi, please call heads or tails to see who will decide who goes first,” Dec said, holding a coin poised and ready to be flipped. 

“Heads,” Kimi said, appearing to be not at all interested in the presenters request and looking at Mark. Mark was looking back at him, challenging his gaze. Dec flipped the coin and it fell onto the ground, with the tails side of the coin buried in the leaves. Kimi had won the toss. 

“Kimi won the toss, would you like to go first or second?” Dec asked, retrieving the coin. 

“First.” the Fin said to Mark. 

“OK, when you’re ready you may open your final dish,” Kimi kept his eyes on Mark as he pulled the paper lid off the container. He flicked his eyes down briefly, trying to remain nonchalant about the final dish. But what he saw make him take another look. 

“Spicy meatballs!” Ant exclaimed in a terrible Italian accent. Mark looked down at Kimi’s dish and, as if not being able to believe he would have the same, he ripped off his own lid and looked down at his dish, which was identical to Kimi’s. Two pale yellow balls that could have been anything were sitting on a bed of pasta. Mark swallowed with difficultly. Kimi couldn’t comprehend what they were. 

“They are?” Kimi asked, still looking at the dish he had been presented with. 

“Turkey testicles,” Ant replied with twisted glee. Mark looked up at him. 

“You’re not serious,” the Australian said in an unbelieving tone. 

“Yes, we are.” Dec replied and Mark turned to face Kimi, happy to be able to see his own discomfort in Kimi’s eyes. “All you have to do is eat one testicle,” 

“You are allowed a second chance at this one, which is why there are two,” Ant followed. 

“I thought you were just trying to be picturesque,” Kimi muttered sarcastically and if Mark weren’t fearful of having to actually put a turkey’s bollocks in his mouth he would have probably laughed. Mark swallowed again, trying to tell himself he could stomach this.

“I wish I was going first,” Mark passed across the table and Kimi agreed, happy that he was. It would be good to just do this and not have to go through the torture of watching someone else do it first. Kimi lifted one of the foul things from the tray and looked at Mark. 

“You’re going to do this?” Kimi asked, cocking one eyebrow. Mark nodded. 

“I’ve got to, mate.” He replied in a weak voice, slowly twisting the brown, leather surfer bracelet around his left wrist. Kimi could have sworn he recognised it, but there were more pressing matters than worrying about Mark’s bracelet. Kimi turned to the presenters. 

“Would you do it?” He asked, still holding the testicle about three feet from his face. Dec didn’t move but Ant gave one nod. 

“Yes, I would,” Ant said in an even tone. 

“Liar.” Kimi commented and taking a deep breath he placed the thing in his mouth. And immediately wanted to spit it out. Everything combined was just too much. The taste. The texture. The knowledge of knowing what he was chewing on. He clamped his mouth shut as his body tried to spit it out. He had to do this. His cool, nonchalant composure disappeared the instant the thing passed his lips. He couldn’t keep up his act; it was too much. It got worse. His teeth suddenly broke through the tough outer body of the testicle and a horrid substance trickled down his throat. He gaged it back up but his lips were firmly shut. His eyes were screwed tightly and he could feel tears prickling in the corners. The worst part of gaging it back up was that he knew he had to swallow it again. He forced himself to keep chewing. Screaming profanities in his head, he tipped his head back and made himself swallow. With the last few bits falling into his digestive system he fell forwards on the table, taking deep slow breaths. 

“Kimi? Have you-?” Kimi stopped Dec’s question by opening his empty mouth and lifting his head. Mark closed his eyes and exasperated. Now he had to do it. “Well done. Have a drink,” Kimi didn’t reach for his water bottle. He just sat with his eyes closed, taking deep, long breaths. “How was it?”

“There is another. You can try.” Kimi said, picking up his tray and offering the second testicle to the presenters. 

“No thank you, Kimi. That’s fine.” Ant said. Kimi didn’t move the tray away. 

“Is nice really.” He said, waving it tantalisingly towards them. The presenters laughed awkwardly, not really sure what to do. Kimi put the tray down and took a swing of water, spitting it quickly into a nearby bush before swallowing a few mouthfuls. 

“OK, Mark. To keep yourself in-”

“-I know. I know.” Mark said, looking down at his own tray. If Kimi could do it, so could he. He picked up one of the testicles and was automatically repulsed by the slippery feel to it. He didn’t want to do this. He really didn’t want to eat a turkey’s testicle. 

“They’re quite big for turkeys…” Mark mused, trying to distract himself. 

“That is true, they are very large,” Dec said, trying to keep a straight face. 

“Are you sure they are from a turkey? Not like a goat or something instead?”

“We’re sure, Mark,” Ant said in a much more controlled tone than his co-presenter. Dec turned his back to the drivers, trying to push away his laughs. 

“Just checking…” Mark said, his voice failing him at the end. He could do this. It would taste like a ball of turkey meat. He liked turkey. He could do this. He closed his eyes and put the thing in his mouth. It did not taste like turkey. 

There was a hint of it, yes. But it was all wrong. Everything just tasted wrong and nothing could have prepared him for the substance pouring out of it. He threw his hands over his face, constantly chewing. He should swallow this. He would swallow this. He could swallow this. He had to swallow this. His team needed a win. He had to do this. The first time he reached nearly bailed him out of the game. He wasn’t ready to have to try and hold the stuff in his mouth. He kept forcing himself to swallow. Slowly, bit by bit, it was getting easier; less and less of it remained in his mouth. He kept going. Chewing as much as he could. With some kind of relief he opened his empty mouth with his eyes closed and groped with his left hand for his bottle. 

“Well done. Well done both of you.” Dec said as Mark’s hand grasped the neck of his bottle and he shakily brought it to his lips, eyes still closed. “What did it taste of?”

“Shit. That was fucking horrible, mate.” Mark said, slowly relaxing his shoulders. “Your chewing at it, and that’s bad enough because you know what it is. But then you get into the middle of it and…” Mark couldn’t finish his thought. He shook his head and took another mouthful of water. 

“Is bad.” Kimi finished. Mark opened his eyes and sighed. It was over now. He had done it. He just wanted to go back to camp and lie on his bed, trying to forget everything that he had to eat. He felt wasted. 

“Well you’ve both eaten each dish which means there is five meals up for grabs for the winner of the tie break,” Ant said, tapping his cards on the palm of his hand. Mark turned to him looking panicked. 

“Tie break?”

“Now you have eaten all of your meals you need something to wash it down with,” Dec said. 

“I’m OK with water.” Kimi stated, lifting his bottle back to his lips. Mark raised a small smile. 

“For a bit more flavour, we have got you some Cock-o-colas,” Ant said as two coca cola glasses full of some putrid brown stuff were placed in front of the drivers. They both looked at each other, not amused. 

“Do I have to be told what it is?” Mark questioned, turning to the presenters. 

“It is a cocktail of blended cockroaches,” Dec said. 

“That’s a yes then.” 

“Whoever drinks the cocktail first and replaces an empty glass on the table will win the meals for their camp,” Ant said, and a familiar glint shone in both Kimi and Mark’s eyes. Something one would usually only see on a Sunday morning: the anticipation of a race. 

“Is a race?” Kimi asked, suddenly a little more interested. Mark placed his hand on the bottom of his glass ready to start. Nothing could be as bad as the turkey testicles. 

“Yeah,” Ant said and Kimi took a similar position to Mark. They were both looking at each other. “When you hear the klaxon you may begin,”

“Best of luck to both of you,” Dec said, though the drivers weren’t listening. There was silence for a moment before the air was spilt by the booming horn of the klaxon. Both drivers raised the glass to their lips at the same time and both began to guzzle down the brown liquid. There wasn’t enough time to think about the taste. Mark watched as the last few dregs slid down the glass towards him. As they neared the end the taste started to become apparent in their mouths. Mark persistently kept swallowing, though it was continually getting harder. Kimi had a different tactic and was taking huge mouthfuls, draining the glass quickly. The only problem with Kimi’s tactic was that the taste was very strong in his mouth and he was fighting to keep swallowing. They both put their glasses on the table at almost the same time, but one was ahead by three tenths of a second. Both of the drivers looked to Ant who had a finger pressed to his ear. 

Kimi had been off the pace. 

“Congratulations, Mark. You were fastest,” Ant said, pointing at the Australian. Mark broke into his characteristic smile and was relieved that everything he had done was not in vain. He hadn’t munched down on a turkey’s testicle for nothing. 

“There was three tenths of a second in it so that was really close,” Dec said. “Commiserations, Kimi, but it is a winner takes all challenge so you will leave here with nothing.” Mark felt a little bad; Kimi had done just as much as he had. Kimi deserved something but that wasn’t how the show worked. 

“Well done, mate. That was tough. Sorry you don’t have anything to show for it,” Mark said as he and Kimi stood. He extended his hand to the Fin, whose normal, not caring air was happily back in place, and Kimi accepted it. 

“I don’t care.” Kimi said, picking up his water bottle and shrugging. Mark had to wonder how genuine that statement was, but he joyfully moved from around the table.

“Well done again, Mark, and condolences Kimi. We’ll let you go and tell the news to your respective camps,” Dec said and the two drivers left, waving goodbye and moving back towards their camps. 

“Yeah, I’m very pleased at how that ended,” Mark said to the interviewer who caught him on his way to camp. “It’s good to not have done all of that pointlessly. I feel a little bit sorry for Kimi because we both did really very well today. That was not easy at all. I thought the camel toe was going to be the worst, but the turkey at the end. Not nice. Really happy though, and it should liven everyone up in camp to know we’ve got a great meal coming tonight,” Mark smiled and gave his signature wink. 

“I do not care. Today I lost and tomorrow maybe we win.” Kimi said with his hat tipped low over his eyes. The interviewer, sensing she was not going to get anymore than that, thanked him and he returned to his camp. 

“Here he comes,” Nico announced for the tenth time since Kimi had left. Jenson and Fernando had got bored of his attentive waiting at the edge of camp around the second announcement and gone back to their own thing. Fernando was lying on his bed, watching Jenson cook some rice and beans for lunch over the fire. Seb, who had also been watching Jenson, spun his head quickly for the tenth time that day. His neck was beginning to ache and he rubbed it soothingly. 

“Are you sure it’s not just another kangaroo?” Seb called, still annoyed at the fact he had tripped over a log in anticipation of seeing how Kimi did in the trial to find out it had only been a kangaroo. 

“Definitely him,” Nico said, getting up. Jenson looked round but Fernando remained still on his bed. 

“Hey! How did it go?” Seb yelled enthusiastically as Kimi descended into the camp. Fernando sat himself up and the Fin came into view. It was hard to tell whether Kimi was happy or sad because he just looked like he didn’t care. Kimi waited until he was standing within the circle of benches around the fire and sat down until he spoke. How he missed his sunglasses. 

“I lost. No meals tonight.” Kimi said in a monotone. Seb looked confused as he sat down next to him whereas Fernando lost interest, falling back onto his bed. 

“What? I don’t believe that for a second. You didn’t win at all?” Seb stated in an outraged tone, rubbing Kimi’s arm soothingly. Kimi scooted along the bench away from Seb’s touch and Seb let his hand fall to his lap. 

“It was winner takes all. I had too eat five dishes and Mark was faster at me than finishing the drink,” Kimi said, confusing the rest of his camp mates entirely. Though he caught Fernando’s attention again. Kimi lay down on the log as Fernando sat himself up, wide eyed. 

“You were against Mark?” Fernando said, his tone disbelieving. Kimi just nodded and pushed his hat over his face, tucking his arms behind his head. Fernando was more annoyed than ever now; he had missed the opportunity to see Mark. Not that it was his choice, but it was still annoying. He fell back down on his bed in anger and rolled over so his back was to the rest of the camp. 

“I don’t want food. That shit was revolting.” Kimi said with his voice muffled by his hat. Jenson nodded and dished out four bowls. None of them really felt up to eating though; the prospect of having to eat just this again for dinner was very off putting. But they were all hungry and so they ate in silence. Nico looked around at them all, from Seb looking sadly at the sleeping form of Kimi to Fernando, skulking back to his bed after depositing his tin with the others for Nico to go and wash up. As Nico walked down to the creak he shook his head. 

“We’re a happy camp, aren’t we,” He muttered to himself as Seb jogged to catch him up and help with the washing. 

However, in Snake Rock, there was a completely different story. Mark walked back into camp, ignoring the frosty atmosphere he could sense in the air and declared: “Whose up for some fine dining?” He laughed at Sergio’s expression of surprise and walked into camp feeling very smug. 

“You won?” Lewis said, getting up from his seat and uncrossing his limbs. Felipe smiled and his posture relaxed. 

“Against none other than Kimi Raikkonen!” Mark said in a joyous tone. The success of the trial didn’t fail to lift anyone’s mood. Mark explained what had happened in the trial and how it was winner takes all. They all felt a little bad because Kimi had done just as much as Mark but had nothing to show for it. Because of this, they all made a vow to make it up to him when they were finally merged into one camp. The frostiness that had been hovering around as Mark entered the camp completely disappeared with the prospect of a good meal and everyone hoped that they could have a night with no arguments. 

“I can’t believe they picked Kimi,” Lewis mused as they sat around the fire, waiting. It had got a lot colder since the sun had disappeared behind the trees. Felipe and Sergio had pulled their sleeping bags from their begs and were sitting in them to keep warm. The others had wrapped themselves up in jackets and huddled close to the fire. “Or you, Mark,” Lewis continued and the Australian looked over to him. “They normally go for the people who are most squeamish around bugs; more entertaining that way. I bet Kimi and you were so casual about the whole thing,”

“Not at all, mate,” Mark said, bringing his jacket closer to his neck. He had never known Australia to be so cold. Though he hadn’t lived out here for a while. “Even the iceman can loose his cool,”

“I wouldn’t have believed it to be possible,” Romain commented, moving some wood around so it burnt a bit more. 

“Oh yeah. Put a scorpion in front of Kimi Raikkonen and you’ll see what the man looks like uncomfortable,”

“I can’t even begin to imagine it,” Felipe said, staring at the fire. “For sure, this must have been amusing.”

“It was on the rounds I went first. When you have to watch him nearly choke on turkey balls and you know you’ve got to eat it next it’s not that funny,”

“Nice mental image before dinner, Mark,” Lewis said, looking up to see if he could spot the bag of food. Sergio saw it first. 

“Look! Here comes dinner!’ He exclaimed excitedly, standing up, climbing out of his sleeping bag and moving to catch the bag as it reached his height. He unclipped the bag and handed it to Romain who opened it curiously. Sergio pulled out the laminate and read it to the camp. “Tonight, due to Mark winning Monday Night Takeaway, you have raw beef shanks, white sweet potatoes and a selection of various vegetables.” Everyone looked at Romain with excited eyes as he sieved through the bag. He pulled out the beef and Mark jumped up to hold it for him whilst he unloaded the rest of the bag. Lewis hovered over his shoulder looking at the beef lovingly. 

“B-E-A-U-Tiful!” Lewis laughed. He moved over to Romain who was heading back to the fire with a pan ad wrapped an arm around his shoulder. “You think you can knock that up, Romain?” Lewis joked, too happy about the amazing meal they were all probably about to have to care what anyone thought.

“I think so,” Romain smiled, setting the pan on the fire. Felipe rolled his eyes at Lewis but kept his mouth shut. Tonight was about having a good meal. 

“Thank you, Mark!” Felipe smiled as he snuggled down in his sleeping bag, his mouth already salivating in anticipation. Everyone raised their mugs towards Mark who gave an extravagant bow as Romain set things up for cooking. 

Croc creak was very quiet. They too had all wrapped up in sleeping bags and jackets around the fire in a desperate attempt to stay warm. Fernando had helped Jenson to cook the dinner, feeling he hadn’t done much all day. Help being the optimum word. There really wasn’t much to do so he ended up just passing things to Jenson and snuggling deeper into his jacket. It reminded him of when they did pre-season testing and he would sit at the back of his garage cold and wrapped in his team jacket. He pulled the zip up and closer to his face, trying to keep his face warm. 

“You can go back to bed if you want,” Jenson said with a small smile, looking over to the shivering Spaniard. Fernando pushed his jacket down from his face to return the smile. 

“Is OK,” He said, snuggling back down into the warmth of the thick, waterproof material that surrounded his torso. 

“I understand why you’re acting like your acting. It’s alright.” Jenson said, putting the bowls down and moving closer to Fernando. 

“Its hard when you see someone everyday…” Fernando mumbled into his jacket. 

“And then you don’t. I know. I know it’s hard for you,” Jenson put an arm around Fernando’s shoulder. Seb and Nico were in a discussion about the best German football teams and Kimi was lying on his bed, looking up at the stars. 

“It doesn’t matter. I’ll get over it.” Fernando said, exasperating and moving to serve up the rice and beans. Jenson just watched him, not really sure what to do. He wanted to help Fernando but the Spaniard was a very independent person. Mark and he were close friends and when you talk to someone as much as they do it was always going to be hard to be split up. Jenson sighed. Hopefully the camps would be merged soon and Fernando could get back to his normal self. Fernando was fun to be around normally. 

“Picked your face off the floor yet?” Sebastian asked as he came over to the fire, taking the bowl of food Fernando offered up to him. Fernando focused on serving up the second bowl. 

“Maybe when we get some food,” Fernando muttered. 

“Hey! I don’t think you would have done any better,” Seb affirmed defensively. Fernando frowned up at Seb, not understanding why he was so quick to defend Kimi. 

“I guess we’ll never know,” Fernando shrugged, passing a second tray to Jenson.

“Never know what?” Nico asked, coming over to get his own bowl of food. Jenson rolled his eyes. 

“Whether or not Fernando would have choked in the trial today.” Seb teased. 

“Leave it, Seb,” Jenson put in, watching Fernando begin to hack at the pan as he scooped up more rice and beans for Nico. 

“At least I would have tried. You would have probably taken one look at it and passed.” Fernando spat as he thrust Nico’s bowl towards him. 

“Thanks,” Nico said in a small voice, taking a seat next to Jenson. The Brit just shook his head and started on his food. 

“We’ll never know,” Seb mimicked Fernando in a mocking way. 

“You’re seriously telling me if someone put a scorpion in front of you, you would eat it?” Fernando said looking back up at Seb. Sebastian swallowed. 

“It doesn’t matter if I would or wouldn’t have, does it? I won’t have to,” Seb folded his arms and Fernando served up a forth bowl for Kimi. 

“A no then,” Fernando muttered to himself. Sebastian huffed in outrage at Fernando’s comment. 

“If you-”

“-Pack it in, alright?” Jenson said, forcing down another mouthful of rice. Fernando smirked at Seb’s defensive posture. It must be killing the German to not be able to break into Fernando about what he said. Fernando kind of wanted to let Sebastian go for it, give him a chance to vent and get rid of some of his bottled up annoyance. But Jenson was right; they didn’t need to fight unnecessarily. 

“Kimi!” Fernando yelled as he finished up the forth bowl. Seb snatched it from the Spaniard’s hands, glaring down at him. 

“You don’t have to shout. Leave him alone.” Seb said before storming off towards Kimi’s bed and taking both Kimi’s and his own meals with him. Fernando filled up the last bowl and took a seat next to Jenson and Nico. He chewed slowly on his first spoonful, looking over at Seb, contemplating his though. 

“Do you think little Sebby has got a growing soft spot for Kimi?” Fernando mused, turning his head from Kimi and Seb to face Jenson and Nico. Nico just looked confused at what Fernando was asking but as Jenson turned to face the pair in question and saw Seb coaxing Kimi to sit up and eat something, a knowing smile pushed itself onto his face. He turned to Fernando and confirmed what the Spaniard was thinking. They both let out a breathy laugh before returning to their meals, the camp seeming to get better and better by the second. 

“What?” Nico asked between mouthfuls, looking confused as ever at the two men beside him. 

“Nothing. Don’t worry, Britney. Eat your beans,” Jenson smirked keeping his eyes on his own food as he scooped it up into his mouth. Fernando’s eyes fell on Kimi and Seb again. 

Camp just got a little more interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next trial is Up To Your Neck In It and the voting will be closed at 9:00pm U.K time on the 1st December. Please note this is a head to head trial and so when voting it must be one member of the red team and one member of the yellow team.
> 
> Also, do vote for relationship you want to see in this Fic (if you want them). I have been setting some up that I can make go somewhere - or not - but I need you to tell me what you want me to do : ) I would also like to know what rating you would like this Fic to be. 
> 
> In a few parts time two more drivers will enter the jungle. It is up to you who these are. Please make your votes for the two drivers from the 2013 line up. 
> 
> VOTING FORMATS:
> 
> Bush tucker: Red/Yellow (Surnames: e.g Rosberg/Hamilton)  
> Relationships: Seb/Kimi  
> Rating: Selected Rating (e.g Mature)  
> Two new drivers: Hulkenburg/Di Resta
> 
> PLEASE NOTE THAT WHEN I CLOSE THE VOTING FOR THE BUSH TUCKER, VOTING FOR RELATIONSHIPS/RATING AND NEW DRIVERS MAY CONTINUE:
> 
> 1st December - Up To Your Neck In It closes.  
> 8th December - Rating voting closes.  
> 10th December - New Drivers closes.  
> Relationships are continuous for now. 
> 
> Thank you for your voting so far!


	4. Day Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot of trials.

Jenson couldn’t sleep. It was going to be one of those nights where the slightest strange noise was going to keep him awake. Or maybe it was the prospect of possibly being picked for a bush tucker trial in the morning. That was not an appealing thought at all. The last thing he wanted was to have bugs all over him. He closed his eyes, trying to think of something else, but the mental image… His eyes burst open again. 

This was stupid. He needed to just forget about everything and go to sleep. He tried to snuggle down in his sleeping bag but he couldn’t make himself close his eyes again. Giving up on getting any sleep entirely, Jenson pushed himself out of his sleeping bag, collected his thick, waterproof jacket and slipped his boots on, heading towards the warmth of the fire. He expected everyone else to be asleep. Luckily there were no snorers in their camp and Jenson hoped like hell everyone in the other camp slept quietly as well. Jenson was about ten feet from the fire when he spoke. 

“Couldn’t sleep either?” The Spanish accent rolled through the darkness. Jenson squinted to make out Fernando’s silhouette against the dying fire. He continued over to the fire and took a seat opposite him. Fernando was sitting on one of the log benches with his knees curled up close to him and his jacket tucked up around his face. Jenson could only just see the details of his face from the flickering campfire light.

“Nope.” Jenson sighed, scooting himself closer to the fire and sliding onto the floor so he could get some warmth from it. Once Jenson was confortable, he looked back up at Fernando. “Though I’ve got a reason to not be able to sleep…” Fernando shrugged; he didn’t expect Jenson to understand. 

“I haven’t done anything all day. Have a lot of energy.” Fernando lied. 

“Me neither, nor Seb or Britney, but they’re both asleep,”

“Maybe they acclimatised better than me then,” Jenson looked over to Fernando who was staring intently at the fire. 

“Maybe that’s not the reason you’re still awake,” Jenson suggested and Fernando looked up at him. Fernando didn’t believe Jenson had a clue as to why he was not able to sleep, but he still didn’t want to push the subject just in case he got an inkling. At that point, Seb decided to make a noise. Jenson and Fernando both looked over to where the German was sleeping – closest to the fire, despite protests from the others – and then to each other with a knowing smile plastered on their lips. Jenson and Fernando crossed over to his bed, looking down on the sleeping German. 

Seb’s bed was closest to Kimi’s, unsurprisingly. The German was lying with his head in the direction of the Finn and was talking. Jenson and Fernando tried to stay as quiet as they could, but it was very hard to suppress the laughs; Seb’s sleepy, incoherent speech was confirming their suspicions from earlier. 

“Kimi… No… Not alcohol… Banana… I want… Your banana… You have… Drink… Hungry…” Seb mumbled as he rolled over, seeming to get very frustrated with Kimi for not giving up his banana in his sleep. “You drink… I no… Don’t want… Banana…” Fernando had to move away, covering his mouth. It was insane how clearly he was talking, even if it was fragmented. Jenson, however, crouched down next to Seb.

“What’s the matter, Seb?” He asked in a gentle tone. Fernando spun round to look at him. Jenson, although he may be a wimp when it came to bugs, was a fucking genius. Fernando didn’t join him though; too afraid of ruining the spectacular show in front of him. How much he wished he had his phone right now…

“Jenson… tell Kimi…” Seb rolled over again with so much force he nearly toppled into Jenson’s lap. The Brit caught his shoulder and secured him on the bed. “Kimi! Why…? Jenson… He pushed me…” Fernando was folded in two trying to supress any sound of his laughter being heard. Jenson was starting to find it hard to keep from bursting out laughing as well. He looked over to the Spaniard and saw tears rolling down his cheek. Poor little Sebi. At least he was having a realistic dream. 

“Why did he push you?” Jenson said in a strained voice. 

“I tried…. Wanted… His banana…” Fernando couldn’t stop his laugh from escaping him. It was too much. It was so innocent and sweet but it was also so funny. Seb’s dream could be implying anything and Fernando just couldn’t hold in his laughter anymore. It felt nice to be laughing though; it felt like such a long time since he last had. Jenson darted over to him with a huge grin on his face. 

“Fernando, shut the fuck up,” The Brit smiled. Fernando composed his breathing. 

“Kimi… Get rid… Dog… Give it to… Jenson…” Seb muttered and neither of them could stop their laughter. 

Mark was sat on his own by the fire in his camp when he heard it, what he could have sworn was a barking laugh. He couldn’t exactly determine what the sudden noise was, but it was definitely human made. Maybe someone was panicking in the other camp and the presenters were making noises to freak them out. Mark wouldn’t have put it past them. He focused on the fire again, hoping Fernando was all right. He hated this not knowing, this separation. He just wanted to know that Fernando was OK, that he was having fun, because that’s all that really mattered to Mark. 

Mark looked upwards through the canopy of leaves and saw the twinkling stars. Pulling his growing cold mug of tea closer to him, he closed his eyes, imagining Fernando looking up at them too and acting out in his head what they would be doing if the Spaniard were here…

\- - -

Jenson had fallen asleep on one of the logs. Fernando considered poking him with the stick he had been attending to the fire with but thought that was a bit harsh. He was bored, though. He turned the stick over in his hands, contemplating the prospect. It wouldn’t be fair to interrupt his sleep as he didn’t get much last night, but it would be funny. The shuffling high behind him made him turn, seeing Nico trying to extract himself from his bed whilst keeping the hood of his jacket securely on his head. As Nico appeared, standing in front of his bed, Fernando noticed that for a guy who was worried about bugs, or so why Fernando had assumed Nico had slept with his jacket on, he didn’t care about his legs. His boxers were a funny pink colour and Nico picked up his rucksack and descended down the hill, heading towards the wash area. His eyes fell on Fernando curiously looking at him and he pulled his hood tighter. Nico looked ridiculous wrapped up to his waist with his pink boxers that showed his legs to the world and then his jungle boots. 

“No one is to look at me until I come back,” Nico said, annoyed and sleepy, to Fernando and the cameras he expected were on him right now. Fernando returned to the fire and laughed quietly as Nico continued onto the wash area. After a few more minutes of nothing happening, Fernando went back to his consideration of poking Jenson with the stick. Bored, and having no one left to talk to, he moved over to the Brit and gave him a prod in the ribs. Jenson swatted the stick away and Fernando jabbed him again, a small smile creeping onto his lips. 

“Go away,” Jenson muttered, rolling away from Fernando. Unfortunately for Jenson, there was no more log behind him and so he rolled off the log and landed on the floor with a thud to the sound of Spanish laughter. Jenson sat up and glared over at Fernando. “That was for?” Jenson asked, rubbing his eyes tiredly. Fernando shrugged. 

“Bored.”

“Sorry, Kimi,” Jenson added sarcastically as he got up and brushed himself down. Fernando turned back to the fire. 

“What can I smell?” The sleepy voice of Sebastian Vettel called over to the group around the fire. Fernando had just put some beans on the fire to try and roast them, getting a different flavour, under Jenson’s instructions. Seb sat himself up, stretching and yawning, pulling himself out of his bed. 

“Bananas?” Fernando muttered to Jenson, getting the Brit to smile. Seb moved over to them, pulling on his dark green shirt with his name and number on the back. He sat next to Jenson. 

“Huh?” Seb said, looking up at Fernando. Jenson wrapped an arm around Seb’s shoulders. 

“Just breakfast, buddy. We’re trying something different-”

“-So maybe for once this shit will taste nice,” Fernando added, shovelling the beans around the pan. 

“Hey! I thought you liked my cooking?” Jenson directed at the Spaniard in mock offence, removing his arm from around Seb.

“Not when we’ve had the same shit cooked the same for the past four meals…” 

“I’m trying. There’s not much you can do with beans and rice… Except-”

“-Beans and rice,” Fernando finished, smiling softly. He placed a hand on Jenson’s shoulder. “I know. I appreciate it,” Jenson nodded and Fernando went back to the beans. 

“Let’s hope whoever’s up for the bush tucker today wins then. I don’t think it would help camp moral if we had to endure a whole day of these again,” Seb joked and Fernando smiled. Jenson swallowed nervously; the prospect still daunting. 

Lewis was looking down at Mark with a smile on his face. The Australian’s head had fallen back over the log he was leaning against and his mouth had opened. It was quiet amusing. His hands were resting in his lap and his mug of tea had obviously fallen out of his limp hands as he fell asleep. So Lewis assumed the dark mark on the front of the Australian’s trousers was tea that had unfortunately spilled over his crotch as the mug fell from his hand. When Lewis had first woken up and seen Mark lying by the fire he assumed he was already awake and starting on breakfast. Lewis sighed; why did they have to take away his phone?

Sergio was filling up the kettle when Romain touched his shoulder. It made the Mexican jump and he splashed water over himself. The day appeared to be warming up, so he wasn’t too worried about the wet patch on his blue shirt. 

“Sorry,” Romain said, reaching forwards and rubbing his hand over the wet patch on Sergio’s shirt. Sergio shied away from Romain’s touch, ignoring the rush of heat he felt go through him. 

“It’s alright,” Sergio blushed and picked up the now full kettle and heading back into camp. Romain sighed, watching the retreating figure of the Mexican. 

“Yell any louder and you’ll wake him up!” Lewis snarled as Sergio put the kettle over the fire. He didn’t even have to look up to know that Felipe was awake and apparently annoying Lewis. Sergio looked around to see where Mark was, knowing that he would end their spat. 

“Am not yelling. For sure, you are now,” Felipe bit back. Lewis growled. 

“Can you not hear yourself sometimes?” 

“What does this even mean?” 

“For sure,” Lewis mimicked. “You don’t understand.” Felipe folded his arms as Sergio’s eyes fell on Mark, asleep between the two bickering campmates. Sergio rolled his eyes as Romain came back from freshening up. 

“Guys, could you tries and give it a rest maybe? Just for the morning?” Romain said, sitting back on his makeshift bed and watching Sergio tend the fire. Both Lewis and Felipe turned on him. 

“I’m not doing anything, Romain. Maybe if you were here rather than hiding off in the jungle you would know that,” Lewis spat. Felipe turned to Lewis.

“And maybe if you weren’t trying to wake up the whole jungle-”

“-You’re just ratty ‘cause you didn’t get your beauty sleep,”

“I sleep fine thank you, Lewis, if you just-”

“-Do you two know how to do anything but argue?” Mark mumbled. Each camp member looked over at the Australian as he rubbed his eyes. He became very conscious of himself and dragged his jacket off his shoulders and over his lap. “Or… OK.” Mark tried to sound uncomfortable to get them to all stop looking at him. Felipe huffed off to his bed to retrieve his clothes – he had been standing in his pyjamas arguing with Lewis – and Lewis rolled his eyes, sitting down next to Mark. With everyone’s attention elsewhere, Mark stood up and dashed off towards the creak, grabbing his shorts on the way. He had been sure it would have been safe last night because it was dark and no one would see. But he hadn’t counted on falling asleep where he was with no chance to hide the evidence of what he had done. 

He jumped straight into the creak after stripping off his shirt. He pulled off his trousers and boxers and cleaned himself quickly with soap. He was glad none of them had decided to follow him. He threw his now sodden clothes onto the bank and climbed out, wrapping a towel quickly around himself. Moving over to his clean, dry pile of clothes, Mark took them into the empty dunny and dressed, shielded from the range of the cameras. Once dressed, he moved back to the bank and collected his clothes, taking them over to the laundrette and soaking them in the foamy, warm water. He moved back into camp, reminding himself to go and finish cleaning them later. As he walked in he noticed that there was silence around camp. 

“Bloody hell, it’s been five minutes and you’re not tearing the shit out of each other!” Mark called in a jokey tone. His eyes fell on Romain first sitting on the end of the line of drivers. Mark frowned momentarily until he walked into the camp and saw Ant and Dec standing, waiting for him to appear. Mark blushed and sat next to Romain. 

“So, now you are all here, the public has been voting for the driver they want to see take part in ‘Up to your neck in it’” Sergio swallowed as Ant spoke. Just the title of the trial sounded frightening. 

“In no particular order,” Dec continued. “Sergio,” Sergio’s eyes widened. He didn’t want to do the trial. He didn’t want to have to be buried in bugs. He didn’t want to do it. He tried to calm his breathing. He hated the pause the presenters gave when they were reading out who was going to do trials. He wished they just said ‘you’re doing it’ and were done with the whole charade. “It’s not you.” Sergio breathed again. 

“Romain,” Ant said. The Frenchman straightened his posture. He would not look afraid. He would look in control of the situation. “It’s not you,”

“Mark,” Mark assumed that Dec would tell him it could be him. It wouldn’t surprise him if he had to do another trial. Nothing would be as bad as the last one he did. Even after last nights amazing meal he could still taste hints of the turkey balls. Or maybe his imagination was just bringing it back to mind. He forced himself not to gag at the memory. “It’s not you,” He was a little shocked, but relieved. He let his signature smile fall onto his face. 

“So that means Felipe and Lewis, it might be you,” Lewis glared over at Felipe, but Felipe was confident it wasn’t him. He hadn’t done anything wrong. It was Lewis who was instigating their fights. He felt sure the Brit would be doing the trial and not him. He wasn’t scared. 

“The public have decided the driver they want to see battle in ‘Up To Your Neck In It’ is…” Lewis wanted it to be Felipe. He would give up a good meal tonight to see the Brazilian fail. Just to be able to rub it in that he, again, failed. And then he could state that he would have been able to complete the trail easily. And no one would be able to prove him wrong because they would never know. “Lewis.”

The Brit’s mouth fell open. Why him? He turned away from the Brazilian, hating the smug look that was spreading on his face. There was no way he could have known Lewis would be up for the trial. The presenter’s departed and Lewis turned on Mark. 

“What will it be like?” Lewis asked in a panicked tone, ignoring the snickers Felipe was emitting behind him. Mark let out a breathy laugh that made it clear he thought Lewis was delusional. 

“How the fuck should I know mate?”

“You’ve done a trial,”

“They’re not all the same,”

“I recon you will be buried up to your neck and creatures will be dropped on your head,” Romain declared. Lewis sent him a dark look. 

“Thanks, Romain. That’s really helpful.”

Nico finally returned back to camp after what felt like an age. The other four had already eaten their breakfast and Nico’s was still by the fire, keeping warm. He dropped into the spare seat next to Jenson and placed his bag between his legs, picking up his food.

“Does it really take you that long to get ready, Britney?” Jenson asked, reaching a hand up to ruffle Nico’s sleek hairdo. Nico batted his hand away with his spoon. 

“Yes, and if you don’t mind I would prefer it if you didn’t waste my efforts.” Nico said, pouting. Jenson held his hands up defensively and Nico continued to eat. Just as the camp began to fall back into the conversation Nico had interrupted, Ant and Dec descended into camp. 

“Good morning!” The presenters called as they stood in front of the five drivers. Nico continued to eat his breakfast as they spoke. Dec spoke first. “It’s bush tucker time again, and as you know, the public have been voting for the driver who they want to see go head to head in ‘Up To Your Neck In It’,” Nico choked a little on his rice. That sounded like some kind of buried trial. If he was picked, there was going to be no meals to night. He tried to think about something else because he could already feel the panic crawling over his skin. He set his breakfast on his lap. 

“In no particular order,” Ant said, looking over each of the driver’s expressions. Nico looked like he was about to be sick, Jenson looked concerned, Seb looked uncomfortable, Fernando looked determined. Kimi, per usual, was looking somewhere different, watching a spider crawl up the lantern to his left. “Jenson,” There was a pause, but the Brit’s expression didn’t change. “It might be you,” Nico spun to look at Jenson in disbelief? It might be Jenson? He couldn’t believe the public would have chosen him; everyone liked him. He must be the other one they say to hold the suspense. Nico was sure the other person that was called would be doing the trial, not Jenson. 

“Kimi,” Dec said. Kimi was still watching the spider, showing no interest in what was happening around him. Dec didn’t wait very long to announced “It’s not you.” Kimi still didn’t take his eyes from the spider. Dec looked to Ant for some kind of support. 

“Err… Fernando,” Ant stumbled. The Spaniard looked up at him but his posture had already deflated. He had guessed it wasn’t going to be him; they wouldn’t leave that many people to not try and build tension. He was very unsurprised when the Newcastle man announced: “It’s not you,”

“Sebastian,” Sebastian shuffled uncomfortably in his seat. He looked down at his hands; as much as he was trying to appear like nothing was fazing him, it was and he really didn’t like the sound of this trial. Fernando squeezed his shoulder compassionately and Sebastian looked over at him, giving him a small smile. Fernando indicated with his head, subtly, to look back at the presenters. Sebastian turned, looking confident. “It’s not you.” Sebastian’s broke into a real smile. He turned back to Fernando who changed his hold on Seb’s shoulder into a gentle pat on the back.

“This means that Nico,” Nico was staring at his breakfast as Ant spoke. He couldn’t do it. “It might be you,”

“The public have decided that the driver they want to see compete in ‘Up To Your Neck In It’ is…” Nico was already certain it was him. Because no one would vote Jenson. Why would they? What had Jenson ever done to deserve a bush tucker? But from the sound of the trial it was going to be in an enclosed space, trapped. Nico knew already he couldn’t do it. He was claustrophobic and wouldn’t manage. He began breathing heavier, loosing focus of what was happening. He knew the public would see his fear and that would probably confirm him for the rest of the trials in the show. He was beginning to panic so much he almost missed it when Ant announced the name of the driver. “Jenson.”

Nico couldn’t move; he was so shocked. Why? Jenson let out a long puff of air. He was going to have to do one at some point, he was glad he was getting his over and done with now. And he had a feeling he was going to be buried in something, but he could work round that. He would keep his eyes and mouth shut tightly until they let him out. They needed to win and he was determined to provide the stars. Ant and Dec left the camp and Jenson pulled Nico into a hug. 

“I’m sorry,” Nico said, his voice muffled against Jenson’s shoulder. Jenson rubbed his back. 

“It’s alright. Hey, don’t worry,” He could feel Nico was shaking in fear. Nico clung closer to Jenson, closing his eyes and breathing in the Englishman. He smelt comforting. He smelt like home. Nico closed his eyes. 

“I’m sorry. I just… Can’t…” 

“It’s Ok, Nico. You don’t have to,” Jenson said, genuinely worried about the young German. Nico nodded against Jenson’s shoulder and the Brit gave him a supportive squeeze before letting him go and crossing over to his bed. Nico remained still for a moment, wanting more than anything to have Jenson’s arms around him. His fingers brushed gently on his lips as he stared at the spot Jenson had just vacated. 

This was a new feeling. 

\- - -

Lewis was the first into the bush tucker clearing. He was eyeing the two empty hourglasses suspiciously. He could happily stand in one of them alone and had a funny feeling that was along the lines of what he would have to do.

“So, Lewis. Why do you think the pubic chose you?” Dec asked, pulling his attention from the hourglasses and to the presenters. 

“Maybe you’ve got a lot of Ferrari fans watching,” Lewis joked. The presenters looked at each other, and Lewis coughed. “I don’t know man, maybe they thought I was bored.”

“Well obviously there has been a little friction in camp.” Dec said. 

“Yeah, but that’s everyone. I think we just need to get some food again. Everyone is happier after food.”

“Alright, well do you want to meet who you will be up against?” Ant asked. Lewis nodded and as he did Jenson descended into camp. Lewis’ face split into a grin. 

“No way, JB?” Jenson smiled in response to Lewis as he headed towards him. “What the hell are you doing here, man?”

“Same thing as you,” Jenson said, accepting Lewis’ hand and pulling him in for a hug. Lewis’ smile got wider; it had been too long since he had had Jenson’s arms wrapped around him. They broke apart too quickly for Lewis’ liking. 

“Now you are both here, let’s explain the rules of ‘Up To Your Neck In It’.” Dec said and the two drivers nodded. 

“You will both be put into one of these egg-timers and the container will fill until you are buried up to your neck in sand,” Ant continued. 

“You will then have to stay in the container for ten minutes,”

“But, this is a bush tucker trial, so you obviously won’t be alone.” 

“The one who can stay in the longest will win five meals for camp.”

“You can get yourself out at any time by saying ‘I’m a celebrity, get me out of here,’”

“However, that will mean by default the other driver will win.”

“In the event of a tie there will be a tie breaker.”

“And also, you don’t have to do the trial, but that will also mean the other camp will get the meals.”

“Well, I suppose I’d better give it a go then,” Jenson said casually. As if he really ever had a choice. Jenson swallowed as he looked at the hourglasses. Close your eyes and keep your mouth shut. 

“If JB’s up for it I can’t let him try alone,” Lewis laughed, clapping Jenson’s shoulder. The older man gave a weak smile. 

“OK, then lets get you into position.” Dec said. Two rangers came forwards and took Jenson and Lewis into their designated container and handed them each a pair of goggles. There was not quite as much room as Lewis had first perceived. He fidgeted uncomfortably as he heard the last lock click behind him. “You guys alright in there?”

“Solid,” Lewis called, wishing he were anywhere else but here right now. Jenson just nodded. He was keeping his mouth shut. He really hoped the presenters didn’t want him to past judgement as the trial went on. 

“Alright then, we’re going to load in the sand now.” Ant called. No sooner had he finished talking the fine particles fell from above them. Jenson enjoyed the sensation for a little while; he could imagine he was lying on the beach at home with Jess. Soaking in the sun, letting the waves crash over his feet. It was a peaceful image he created. He had closed his eyes, drinking it in. He barely noticed that the sand had now closed in around his neck. 

“Jenson’s somewhere else,” Ant muttered to Dec. Jenson had a small smile on his face and appeared to be glowing in a dream-like state. Lewis was the polar opposite. He didn’t like the fact he couldn’t move. Why did it have to be him? Why couldn’t the public have chosen Felipe? 

“Jense, you OK, man?” When Jenson replied in a calm voice it unnerved Lewis. 

“Prefect, mate,” Jenson sighed. Ant and Dec couldn’t help but laugh at the odd state of the 2009 World Champion. 

“On the klaxon your ten minutes will start,” Ant said, containing his laughter. His voice echoed around the plastic containers they were being held in. Lewis needed to calm himself; it was probably about to get a lot worse. 

“Best of luck to both of you,” Dec finished. There was a short pause before the klaxon sounded, causing Jenson to jump and his eyes to fly open, destroying the illusion he had created for himself. 

“Shit! Could have warned me,” Jenson exasperated, evoking more laughs from the presenters. There time had started, but nothing was happening. Jenson bravely looked upwards, frowning. This didn’t seem right. Lewis had managed to calm himself and was starting to relax. He could stand like this for ten minutes. 

“Thirty seconds gone,” Dec said, and Jenson looked from the presenter back upward to the top of his container. Surely they were going to drop something soon. 

“This is easy. I could do this all day,” Lewis said smugly. Jenson closed his eyes and shook his head. 

“Those are famous last words, Lewis,” he called, looking towards his ex-teammate. 

“Starting to panic a little in their, JB? Is it a little difficult for you old folk?”

“I’m just fine, Lewis. I’m seeing this through to the end. We’re fucking starving down there,” Jenson said, settling himself to a neutral position and closing his eyes and ears. Any moment they would drop something. He was ready now. 

“Me to, man. I’ve got something to-FUCK!” The thousands of legs that were poured onto Lewis’ head caught him off guard. Jenson laughed at him without opening his mouth. He had warned him. “Shit man! What the hell are these things?” Lewis said, looking around frantically at the critters that were now surrounding him. 

“They are mealworms, Lewis,” Dec said. 

“Don’t worms dig down and stuff?” Lewis’ panicked tone was clear now.

“No, these are slightly different to a common garden worm,”

“This shit doesn’t look like worms,”

“That’s two minutes gone.”

“Jesus, Jense. How you holding up?”

“I don’t think Jenson will be saying much at the moment, Lewis.” Ant commented as he looked over to the red camps representative. His eyes were screwed shut and his mouth was pressed tightly into a line. He was singing a song in his head, trying to ignore the odd scurrying around him as the mealworms ran around. Just as he was starting to get used to it, as much as you could in that situation, another load of crap was dumped on his head. He would have rolled his eyes if they weren’t clamped tight. 

“In there with you now are also solider crabs,” Ant said. “They may nip, but they cannot hurt you too badly,”

“But they still might nip?” Lewis called as one of them crawled up his face. He blew it from his lip and then clamped them shut, preventing himself from calling ‘I’m a celebrity’. He was on the edge. There was a moment of silence as both the drivers tried to imagine they were somewhere else. 

“Six minutes left, you’re both doing really well,” Dec said. 

“Six minutes? I though we only had to stay in here for ten?” Lewis called, outraged. It felt like he had already been standing there for at least six. 

“And four of those minutes have passed.” Lewis flinched his head as one of the craps crawled towards his ear. The little thing flew across the sand and skidded to a halt, slightly startled. Lewis could swear they were trying to surround him. He didn’t want them anywhere near him. He wanted to forget about them, shut his eyes, but not knowing where they were was more unnerving than knowing. His eyes darted about the area in front of him. 

“Four minutes left,” Ant called as the next batch of creatures were dumped on the driver’s head. Cockroaches. As Jenson felt the new little legs crawling through his hair and across his neck he shut his eyes tighter, returning to his third repeat of the song he was distracting himself with. Breathing out and breathing in. Broken down but I will live to fight again. For one last time. I’ll take this ride. Just Drive…

“Fucking hell! They’re everywhere, man!” Lewis said, a new fear glowing in his eyes as he tried to keep track of the thousand of new critters rushing around him. He began blowing air at them, forcing them away from him and pushing them backwards in their hurried scuttles. He shook his head from side to side as he felt them climbing up his neck. This was torturous. 

“That’s a thousand cockroaches that have been added now,” Dec called, observing the drivers. Lewis was making a wonderful display for the viewers. He looked at Ant and they both acknowledge they needed to get Jenson to speak, or at least get something from him. 

The camp needs the meals. The camp needs the meals. Do not be the one to go back empty handed. The camp needs the meals. They won’t hurt you. They can’t hurt you.  Jenson was chanting to himself so he would stay calm. A solider crap didn’t take kindly to being shook from his head and it caught his ear as it fell. OK, fuck. They can hurt a little. But the camp still needs the meal. You can do this. Think of the food. 

“How is it, Jenson?” Ant called. Lewis turned his head in the direction of his ex-teammate, even though he couldn’t see him. He flinched his head again as a cockroach rushed up the side of his face. Jenson took a deep breath. 

“Fantastic.” Jenson said without moving his mouth very much. His eyes remained closed and he continued to sing to himself, ignoring the throbbing in his ear. It was a good thing one had nipped him; at least now he knew it didn’t hurt too much. 

“How much time left?” Lewis called in a panicked tone. Jenson let a small smile fall onto his lips. 

“Two and a half minutes remaining.” Dec said. Lewis braced himself; he reckoned he had about thirty seconds before some more shit was dropped on his head. The scurrying was getting worse. He didn’t know if he could last the last few minutes. 

“Jense, you gonna do this?” Lewis called, still facing Jenson’s direction. Jenson nodded. “Jense?” The McLaren driver assumed Lewis couldn’t see him. He shook his head slightly and prepared himself to talk again. 

“Yeah.” Jenson called quickly. Lewis deflated; if Jenson was going to finish the trail he couldn’t give up himself. 

“All the way to the end?”

“Nearly there now.” Jenson’s words were punctuated as he kept closing his mouth as a bug ran across his face. “I’ve made… It this… Far… Why give… Why give up… Now…?” Jenson was happy that Lewis seemed to be struggling. Hopefully he wouldn’t be able to take it any longer and Jenson could get out of here sooner. But Jenson’s determination became Lewis’ determination. They both fell silent as the clock ticked down. 

“Thirty seconds left,” Ant called. Neither of the drivers reacted. They both just stood, trying to count down the seconds. Jenson wanted Lewis to bottle it. Just give up now and get himself out. But it was too close to the end now. They would have to do the tie break. Jenson tried not to think about what that might be. Ten. Nine. Eight. Seven. Six. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. 

“Ok. That’s it. Congratulations, you’ve both completed ‘Up To Your Neck In It’!” Ant called. Jenson had counted bang on the time. Lewis sighed in relief. 

“Can I get out of here now?” Lewis called, looking over to the presenters. They didn’t show any intentions of letting him out. He was about to protest when Ant continued to talk. 

“Since you both remained in the trial for the whole ten minutes you have both earned the total five meals that are up for grabs.” He started. 

“However, only one of you can take the meals back to camp.” Dec added. 

“To decide who takes them you will now both participate in the tie break,” Jenson swallowed; this was what he feared. 

“To your left is a red button. What you must do is time a minute from when the klaxon starts and press the button when you think time is up. The driver who presses the button closest to the minute mark will win the trial.”

“Do you understand?” Ant asked. Jenson and Lewis nodded. Jenson still hadn’t opened his eyes. “OK. If you would like to get a hand free so you can press the button…” Lewis was surprised at how easy it was to move his hand free from the hold of the sand. Jenson cracked his eyes opened slightly so he could see where the button was and placed his hand over it. Once he was in position he closed his eyes again. The bugs in both containers began to run hurriedly up the newly exposed skin. 

“On the sound of the klaxon you may begin counting,” Dec said. 

“Best of luck to both of you,” Ant added. A few seconds after he had spoke the klaxon started and Jenson focused on counting to sixty at a regulated pace. Lewis was counting faster than Jenson; he was on twenty-nine when Jenson was only on eighteen. A bug rushed across Lewis’ ear and he let out a squeal, afraid the thing might try and nest in his ear. Having successfully shook it off; he turned his attention back to the button. But he had lost count. He frowned, angry with himself. It was important that he won this. The shit Felipe would give him for loosing. He looked over at the presenters but they showed no indication of time. He was fucked. And beginning to panic. More bugs crawled over his skin. He just wanted to be able to see how Jenson was doing. It was too important. He took a wild guess, assuming he had wasted about twenty seconds panicking. He counted down the last ten seconds and hit his button. No one said anything. Lewis looked at the presenters confused. 

Jenson still had thirteen seconds to count when he heard Lewis’ buzzer. He didn’t ponder on why his ex-teammate had buzzed earlier as he didn’t want to loose count. He was confident he was right. He hadn’t swayed from his regular beat. He nodded the last ten as he counted. The urge to mouth the last ten numbers was great, but the fear of getting a bug in his mouth was greater. Five. Four. A bug ran over his face and momentarily fazed him. He froze in his counting but then remembered what he had to do. Three. Two. One.

The second buzzed went off and the presenters called for the drivers to be let out. The doors at the back of the hours glasses opened and the sand and bugs rushed out of the back. Lewis shook himself as he rushed out the back door, climbing through the last foot of sand. He never wanted to do that again. Lewis was frantically brushing his arms as he approached the presenters. Doctor Bob pulled Jenson to the side as he exited his glass confinement. He inspected Jenson’s ear to make sure there was no damage from the crap. Jenson was unaware that his ear had wept a little blood. It was cleaned up and luckily was only a little scratch. He thanked Doctor Bob, who placed a little plaster over the wound to prevent infection, telling Jenson to remove it at the latest tomorrow morning, and re-joined Lewis and the presenters. 

“Congratulations to both of you on that trial, how was it?” Dec said as Ant was given another card by one of the producers. Jenson’s eyes fell on it, knowing it held the result of the trial. 

“Horrible. Initially it felt like you couldn’t move, and then you’ve got crap being dropped on your head. Not something I wish to repeat,” Lewis said, brushing the back of his shoulders. 

“You had over a thousand critters in there with you,” Ant said, making Lewis freeze in his de-bugging process and look at the presenters wide eyed. “Jenson, you seemed to be concentrating very hard on not knowing what was around you,”

“Yeah, your constant updates were really helpful in that,” Jenson joked, making the presenters smile. “No, I mean, it’s not really what you want to be doing on a Tuesday afternoon. I was singing to myself if I'm honest,”

“Singing?”

“Yeah, keeping myself distracted,”

“And what were you singing?” Dec said through a smile. 

“The sky F1 song, Just Drive? Don’t know if you’ve heard it,”

“Maybe if you gave us a rendition we might recognise it?” Dec suggested. Jenson gave his signature smile. 

“Maybe some other time,”

“So here I have the results of the tie break.” Ant said and the anticipation of the competition became clear to the drivers again. “There was a thirteen second gap between the two of you,” Jenson nodded. He felt a bit more confident knowing he had got that time right. Lewis swallowed nervously. “The winner of the head to head trial is…” Jenson knew he had either been extremely close or thirteen seconds out. He let his mind ponder to Lewis’ early buzz. Maybe Lewis had got the timing right. Maybe Jenson had lost. He couldn’t bear to think about taking no meals to camp again. Lewis was very quiet. He was sure he had lost. He had lost count. 

“Jenson.” 

Jenson let the smile spread across his face as Lewis sighed, unsurprised. He didn’t want to hear Felipe’s bitching. He had tried his best and that was what counted. Hopefully Romain could do something special with the rice and beans they had to eat tonight. Jenson was ecstatic. He could barely contain his happiness. He was sure that the other members of the red camp would assume Jenson would loose and he couldn’t wait to give them the good news. But he was going to play the cliché. Oh yes, he was going to pretend it had all gone badly. Because he had the opportunity to. 

“Well done, Jenson, and commiserations, Lewis.” Dec said. “How happy do you think camp will be, Jenson?”

“So happy, mate. We haven’t eaten anything but rice and beans for the past two days. They’ll be happy that there will be a bit more flavour tonight,”

“And Lewis, it is disappointing to loose, considering how much you did today?” 

“No one likes to loose,” Lewis started, trying to hide the bitterness in his voice. “But I had to let him win this one; I bet Kimi will be whining there’s no food,” Lewis joked. 

“Congratulations to you both, we’ll let you head back to camp,” Ant smiled and the two drivers shook the presenters hands. As they passed out of the bush tucker area, Jenson pulled Lewis into a tight hug. 

“You did really well, mate. They will be happy because you did your best,” Jenson said, rubbing Lewis’ back. Lewis fell more into Jenson’s hold. He nodded into Jenson’s chest and too soon his ex-teammate was pulling away. “I’ll see you soon,” Jenson smiled, gaining a confused frown from Lewis. “They can’t keep us apart much longer,” Jenson said. Lewis understood he meant the camp merge would happen soon. He smiled and watched Jenson cross the bridge. Lewis shook his head at himself; he had hoped that moving way from McLaren would have muted his feelings for Jenson. It hadn’t. It just made him miss his fellow Brit more.

“It’s great to be able to bring meals to camp,” Jenson smiled to the interviewer as she stopped him. “Even to know I did better than Kimi is a win in my eyes. I think we all need the food really; too much rice and beans for one lifetime. Hopefully you’ll provide something nice and my efforts won’t be in vain.” Jenson joked and departed from his interview. It was just like being stopped in the press pit after a race. Apart from here he was talking about how he had stood in a container full of sand and bugs for over ten minutes rather than how his race had gone. It still put him in the same frame of mind, making the whole process feel a little bit more normal. 

“Jenson is very good at keeping track of time. He always counts pit stops so I suppose I shouldn’t have been surprised he was pretty much on the money. I think he buzzed at around 62 seconds. I buzzed way too early. 49-ish I think. A bug distracted me; it made me loose count. It’s a bit disappointing going back to camp without food but I guess that is part of the challenge.” Lewis shrugged. He wanted the woman to ask him more questions, prevent him from going back into camp and receiving Felipe’s taunts. But she was satisfied with what he had said and told him he could go. He sighed, pausing at the top of the stairs. This wasn’t going to be easy. 

“Here he comes,” Sergio mutter to Mark, who had been sitting next to him as they tried to fashion some cards out of dried leaves. Mark followed Sergio’s gaze and noted Lewis’ expression. 

“He doesn’t look happy,” Mark muttered back, looking over to Sergio. Sergio placed the leaf with a scratched ‘4C’ on it down on top of the pile of other leaves with ‘C’s on them, next to the pile of D’s, H’s and S’s. 

“Suppose it’s just rice and beans tonight then,” Sergio said and Mark nodded, turning to see where Felipe was. He was sitting by the fire, staring with bored eyes at the flames. Mark rolled his eyes; it was all about to kick off. 

“How did it go?” Romain called, standing up to get a better look at Lewis. He had seen his blue and yellow shirt moving through the cover of leaves. Felipe looked up too. The Brazilian hoped that Lewis had failed, but at the same time hoped he had won. He was very hungry. 

“Shit. I lost.” Lewis said and he headed straight for his bed. Sergio continued with the leaf-cards as Mark got up. Felipe rolled his eyes. 

“It’s alright, mate,” Mark smiled softly. “I’m sure you didn’t give up. Get through to the tie break?” Lewis nodded. “There you go then. Couldn’t ask any more from you,” Mark smiled and crossed over to Lewis, sitting next to him and placing a supportive hand on his shoulder. “Don’t beat yourself up about it, yeah? We can’t win everything,” Mark muttered and Lewis nodded, giving him a sad but thankful smile. Romain rested his foot on the log seating, as Mark usually did on the podium, and faced Lewis. 

“Who were you against?” Romain asked. Lewis seemed a little more relaxed with Mark sitting next to him. 

“Jenson,” Lewis said, closing his eyes and relaxing back into his seat. 

“Jenson? Really?” Sergio called across the camp. Everyone but Felipe turned to face him. “That’s surprising,”

“As surprising as Mark being chosen yesterday,” Romain nodded in agreement. The Mexican and Frenchman’s eyes met briefly before Sergio looked back down at his makeshift cards. 

“Nah. I was predictable,” Mark sighed, looking over to Felipe. He was still staring at the fire with his arms tightly folded. Mark wondered if he would have reacted the same if it had been anyone else who had come home with no meals. He looked to Romain as the Frenchman spoke. 

“Really?” Romain said, turning away from Sergio. 

“Yeah; I’m an Aussie, aren’t I? I wasn’t at all surprised,”

“Who do you reckon it will be tomorrow?” Lewis asked, closing his eyes. His body began to ache from being tense for so long and having to have stood in one position. 

“Couldn’t guess,” Mark sighed. His eyes fell back on Felipe. “All depends on how tonight goes I suppose,” he sighed to himself as Felipe got up and headed down the slope to the creak. Mark turned back to Lewis to find the Brit asleep. He smiled and got himself up, moving across camp to help Sergio with his cards. 

“All I’m saying is that the regulations are changing and the weight restrictions are not,” Nico said, trying – again – to make the others see his point. They were all around the fire. Kimi was lying on his bed, not at all interested in the conversation, and Seb was perched on the edge, scraping his feet through the dirt of the floor. Fernando was standing by the fire with a confused expression on his face and his arms folded. Nico was sitting on his hands on the log he had sat on when the driver who was taking part in the trial had been called. 

“You seriously think this is a ploy to get us all to loose weight?” Fernando asked in disbelief. He looked down into the fire where the leaves he had put in a bit of oil were crackling away. Fernando was definitely getting bored of beans and rice as he was now trying to make leaf crisps. Not that the others were complaining about his experiment. When he had come into camp with a handful of green leaves he had plucked from a nearby tree they had all been unsure of the result. Now they were all hoping it was going to be good. 

“What other reason would they want to put us all in here?” Nico challenged. Fernando looked at Seb who was finding the prospect very entertaining. 

“For a laugh? Ecclestone told Christian it was a publicity thing. Try to get more people watching F1 next season,” Seb suggested.

“Not sure he would be happy with you announcing that to the public,” Fernando winked at the Red Bull driver, gesturing his hand outwards to the cameras he assumed were hidden in the trees. Sebastian blushed. 

“But that could have been a ruse. Who told you that?” Nico said to Sebastian. 

“Christian.” 

“Right! I reckon the top teams got together and organised this so we would have an advantage next year.”

“Then why would they put Mark in?” Fernando said, turning over some of the leaves. If the smell was anything to go by then he would have wasted the oil he used to cook them in. Although at this stage anything was better than rice and beans. 

“Good point,” Seb agreed, watching Fernando. “Mark isn’t in F1 next year. If the top teams were doing it for an advantage then they would have put Daniel in here,” 

“Maybe they will at some point. Maybe Mark is a ruse as well. Just in here so the public don’t get suspicious,”

“Jenson is back.” Kimi said. He had been hanging his head off the end of his bed and saw the upside down Brit re-entering the camp. They all looked round to see Jenson’s deflated figure. Seb and Fernando looked at each other disappointedly. They silently agreed to be supportive. 

“How was it?” Fernando asked with a small smile, abandoning his leaves momentarily. Sebastian got up and stood next to Fernando, still on the level of his bed – so he was higher than the Spaniard. Nico looked up with hopeful eyes. 

“I’m sorry, guys…” Jenson said, in a dejected tone. He sat heavily on the log bench and rested his chin on his hand, his elbow leaning on his knee. Seb crossed over to him and gave him a small smile. Jenson could see he was trying to supportive but the sadness was too clear in his eyes. This had been such a good idea. Jenson looked at the floor to stop himself from smiling and ruining the whole game. 

“I’m sure you tried your best,” Seb said in what was supposed to be a comforting tone. Jenson just nodded and added a deep sigh for effect. 

“Wait… You lost?” Nico said. He was a little confused and needed it to be confirmed. Seb shot him a look that said shut-up. 

“Who were you against?” Seb asked, fidgeting with his fingers in his lap awkwardly. 

“Lewis,” Jenson sighed. Nico was confused.

“Lewis? He sucks with bugs! Who could you-?” 

“Nico, I swear if you say one more word-” Fernando growled, scowling at the German. How could he not get this?

“-It’s alright, Fernando. I’d be pissed to,”

“You tried your best, am sure. You couldn’t have done more than that,” Fernando said, relieving his frustration of another night of rice and beans on the stupidity that was Nico Rosberg. 

“What did you have to do?” Seb said, bringing the conversation back to Jenson. 

“Stand in a tube full of bugs and sand for ten minutes.” Jenson said in disgust. 

“And Lewis stayed in there? He didn’t call to get out?” Nico was still in disbelief. If a spider was in the Mercedes garage Lewis would refuse to go in until it was cleared out. This couldn’t be right.

“Yes, Nico.” Fernando growled again, glaring over at Nico. Nico shrunk a little under Fernando’s intense gaze. 

“I made it through the ten minutes,” Jenson continued, wanting to end the game quicker now he could sense an argument about to explode. “And then we had to do a tie break. We had to count a minute and press a button when we though it was up.” 

“Still in the container of bugs?” Seb queried. Jenson nodded and Seb shivered unpleasantly. “Don’t worry, I would have found it hard too,” Seb admitted. 

“Yeah?” Jenson looked up at him and he nodded. “Good thing I’m better than you at counting then,” Jenson said, letting the smile slide onto his face. Seb frowned. 

“What?”

“You bastard!” Fernando laughed. Jenson smiled over at him, feeling his cheeks relax into their normal position. Fernando felt a wave of relief flood over him as he laughed some more. 

“I don’t understand,” Sebastian said. Jenson turned to him. 

“I was closest to sixty seconds.” The realisation poured onto Seb’s face. 

“You mean you-?”

“Yup,” Jenson laughed and Seb pulled him into a hug. Jenson got up and caught Fernando’s hand, letting himself be pulled close to the Spaniard and accepting the clap on the back. It felt wonderful to have brought the meals home for camp. Kimi got up and smiled at Jenson, shaking his hand happily. Jenson was shocked. 

“Thank you.” Kimi mumbled. 

“No problem, mate.”

“At least now we do not have to eat Fernando’s leaves.” Kimi smiled as he released the Brit’s hand and folded his arms. 

“Hey! They could be amazing!” Fernando said in mock outrage. Kimi rolled his eyes and Fernando stuck his tongue out at him. 

“Not if the smell says anything.” Kimi said, taking a seat beside Seb. Sebastian shuffled awkwardly in his seat for a second before he settled himself. Kimi remained unaware, but Jenson and Fernando exchanged a knowing look, smiling at each other. 

“I’m really confused,” Nico said, pulling everyone’s attention to him. They had all forgotten him in their excitement for food. 

“I won.” Jenson smiled. Nico still looked at him blankly. “I won the food for tonight.” Kimi rolled his eyes when Nico stilled looked confused. 

“You won the food?”

“Yes.”

“Lewis bailed out early?”

“No, I got closer to sixty seconds than he did.” There was a small pause. 

“But you said sorry…?”

“I was pretending I did badly.” Jenson sighed. Fernando took the pan off the fire and put the leaves into one of the tins. It suddenly dawned on Nico.

“Oh! Jenson! Oh- Congratulations!” Nico smiled as he got up and hugged Jenson. The Brit laughed and as he pulled away ruffled his hair. Nico pouted, flattening back down. 

“Aha. I didn’t know you were so gullible, Britney,” Jenson laughed. Seb noted that it was nice to have the prospect of food; it lightened the atmosphere in camp. Jenson turned to make a joke about how Nico would have faired in the trial when his eyes fell onto what Fernando was doing. His mouth dropped open in bewilderment. “What the hell is that?” Jenson pointed to the fried, shrivelled, brown/green items Fernando had in his tray. Fernando looked up at Jenson innocently, like a child who was trying to eat a mud cake. 

“I tried to make crisps?” Fernando said, worried Jenson would be annoyed he used the oil. 

“Really that hungry?” Jenson said. Fernando nodded, looking down at his creation. “Good thing I won today then, hey,” Jenson sighed. 

“You’re not annoyed?” Jenson laughed at Fernando’s worried tone. 

“No, Fernando. Hopefully you’ve got something good there that we can replicate if we have another night with no food.” Fernando seemed happy with himself as he gave them each a leaf to try. There were a few left over that Fernando wrapped up to be saved in case they were good. Each of them chewed on their leaf cautiously. It was an odd taste. The crispiness of a crisp, yes, but it tasted oaky. The sense of eating a leaf was very clear as the taste filled their mouths. Fernando didn’t think it was too bad and was happy. Nico gave the rest of his to Fernando, and Seb gave encouraging words as he drunk a mouthful of water. It hadn’t been too bad, but Jenson and Kimi shared a look of agreement that they would not eat these again unless there really wasn’t anything else. 

\- - -

Seb walked back into camp with a laminated piece of paper in his hands. The rest of them had been debating the possibilities of what they might be getting for dinner, but the all fell silent as Seb stood by the fire in the afternoon heat and read from his page. 

“Crock Creak,” Seb started and Fernando sat forwards. He was hoping they were going to be told Mark was coming over. “This afternoon, you will all take part in the Clash of the Camps.” Fernando fell back and sighed. “There will be three trials to be completed, Mental, Strength and Memory. Two members of camp must take part in Mental and Strength and the sole remaining campmate will take part in Memory. Each trial will win some treat or treats for camp. You will be head to head against members of the other camp. Good luck.” Seb lowered the sheet and looked around at everyone. 

“So…?” Nico asked, fairly confused by what they were being asked to do.

“We have three ‘games’, shall we call them, and we will complete in them against members of Snake Rock to win prizes.” Seb explained and Nico nodded. 

“OK, well who is good at remembering things?” Fernando asked. He knew they would all be good at the strength trial – some better than others – and thought the process of elimination was the best way to go about this. 

“Jenson is pretty good.” Kimi said, sitting up from his position of lying. Sebastian nodded and Fernando looked at Jenson.

“Are you OK doing the Memory game then?” Fernando asked. The camp seemed happily in agreement that Jenson was the best candidate for this game. Jenson smiled. 

“That’s fine by me, as long as everyone is OK with that,” There was a chorus of ‘yes’ from around the camp. 

“OK, so that’s memory settled,” Seb said, turning up the corners of the sheet in his hands. “Strength?”

“Kimi, definitely.” Jenson said. 

“I agree.” Kimi nodded. That was one decided. 

“And…?” Seb said, not looking at anyone. He wanted to do it but he had a feeling everyone else would want Fernando. And to be honest, he would pick Fernando as well. But he wanted to do a task with Kimi. 

“Do you want to do it, Seb?” Fernando asked with a soft smile. It was reassuring as Seb took it in. He knew Fernando would think himself more suited for the trial than Seb, but he was letting the German know that he would support him and step aside if he wanted to do it. 

“I thought you would be better,” Seb said, holding Fernando’s gaze. 

“Only if you don’t want to,” Fernando returned. 

“Let’s vote on it then,” Nico said. 

“I don’t think a vote is necessary,” Fernando cut in, knowing if it went to vote he would probably be voted rather than Seb. “If Seb doesn’t want to do it I'm happy to, but whoever does will do just fine so it really doesn’t matter.” Seb was grateful for Fernando’s support and gave him a thanking smile. 

“I think Fernando and Kimi should do Strength, so Nico and I will do Mental and Jenson will do Memory.” Seb concluded and everyone nodded. That was easier than he had thought. 

“Why must I do memory?” Felipe spat, his annoyance from earlier flooding over his words after he had contained it for so long. Sergio stood awkwardly holding the laminate limply in his hands. Romain was playing solitaire with Sergio’s leaves and Mark was trying to restore some kind of order – per usual – between Lewis and Felipe. 

“Because I thought you would be the best! Sorry, I didn’t know you couldn’t accept a compliment!” Lewis spat back. He had tried to be nice but Felipe had thrown it back in his face. He couldn’t try and sort this out if Felipe was going to be a baby about it. 

“Felipe, calm down. If you don’t want to do Memory then don’t do it. We’re just trying to deci-”

“-I never said I didn’t want to, Mark. Is the way he assumes!”

“You do realise you are now arguing about nothing, right?” Romain commented, not looking up from his ‘cards’. 

“I do not like it when I am assumed about! He assumes he knows but he doesn’t!”

“If you don’t want to do Memory then I’ll fucking do it!” Mark seethed. 

“No, Mark, we need you to do Strength.” Sergio said in a quiet voice. Felipe turned to Mark. 

“I thought we already decided this?” Felipe said confused. 

“Why don’t you tell us what trial you want to do, Felipe.” Romain said, having no more possible moves in his game and giving up on the cards. Felipe looked at the floor.

“I think out of the three I will be best at Memory,” he muttered, knowing that this would annoy the others. 

“Then why did you-?” Lewis started in an annoyed tone, but Mark cut across him, wanting to end the pointless argument. 

“-Alright. So Felipe is doing Memory. Who wants to do strength with me?”

“I think Sergio and myself would be best for Mental,” Romain commented, directing his gaze at Sergio. Sergio didn’t look at him. 

“So that leaves Lewis?” Felipe said. 

“Felipe for Memory. Sergio and Romain for Mental. Lewis and me for Strength. Everyone happy?” Mark said. Everyone nodded. He sighed and sat back down. He wished Fernando were here; at least he would have muttered a comment in Mark’s ear that would make him smile. Though thinking of Fernando did make him smile. He assumed the Spaniard would be up for the Strength trial. The thought pleased him. 

Nothing much happened in either of the camps, apart from Fernando offered around more of his leaf crisps which everyone refused, so the Spaniard ate a couple himself. When Sebastian, Nico, Sergio and Romain were all called to go off for their Mental challenge, they left the camps to a victorious cheer of good luck. Mark looked between Lewis and Felipe as they both settled themselves, wondering if they would be able to keep the peace for the next half-hour. 

Sergio and Romain walked into the clearing at the same time as Seb and Nico. The members of Snake Rock gave each other a look of amusement; they didn’t think Nico would be extremely good at this. They each had a chalkboard that had been split into lots of rows with two columns at the end reading “Correct team” and “Correct place”. Sebastian recognised the game as mastermind automatically. There was a laminate pined to a centre post with the instructions. Nico read them out. 

“Drivers, welcome to the first Clash of the Camps trial. You must crack the code on your chalkboard before the other team in the least amount of lines. The first team to crack the code will win jam and bread for their camp to go with their dinner.” Romain knew they needed to win this challenge. It was necessary that they had something other than rice and beans this evening. He was determined. 

There was a ranger standing on a side of the chalkboards and Nico, Seb, Romain and Sergio positioned themselves. A klaxon went off, scaring the crap out of Nico. It became clear quickly that Nico had no understanding of what they were trying to do, so he just handed Seb the tokens to stick on the board. Nico was amused by the use of the top eight teams as the counters, each of their logos like a small reminder of normality. Seb let him pick the first four to start with and placed Ferrari, Red Bull, Mercedes and McLaren on the board. Sergio and Romain placed Lotus, McLaren, Force India and Ferrari on theirs. The red team, Nico and Seb, got three teams right and one in the correct position, whereas the yellow team had three teams right and none in the right position. 

Sergio and Romain took a moment to look at the board. They decided to move McLaren, Ferrari and Force India up as there guessed correct teams. They put Red Bull then Force India then McLaren and the Ferrari and stood back waiting for their ranger to give them the verdict. Seb and Nico were already falling behind. 

“Nico, I don’t want to Mercedes token,” Seb said, holding his hand out. 

“But it might be right!’ Nico whined. 

“As may the other three, that could be the one that is wrong,”

“Take your team off the board then,” Nico pouted. Seb glanced over to the yellow team and saw they were making headway to the third row. Seb moved over to the box and took out the Sauber token. 

“If you’re not going to help me then fine, if you are give me the tokens I ask for!” Seb said as he crossed back to their board. He had Sauber, Red Bull (assuming this was the one in the correct place), McLaren and then Ferrari. Sergio and Romain now had three teams correct and one team in the right place. Only three teams remained as a constant, so they took the risk and assumed Force India was wrong. That left them with McLaren and Ferrari as the only two possibilities of being in the right place. They left McLaren, working on the process of elimination. Seb and Nico had three teams right and one in the right place again on their second row. One team was still wrong but there were three constants in both of their lines. Seb assumed he had Red Bull in the right place. 

Sergio stepped back after placing the last token on their third row to see Sebastian finish his second. The yellow team had now got Mercedes, Ferrari, McLaren then Red Bull. This gave them three correct teams and two in the correct place. So they had McLaren right. And they worked out Ferrari and Red Bull were the other correct teams. 

“Look,” Sergio muttered to Romain, pointing down at their first row. Sergio had noticed that they had had Lotus in the first row with three teams correct. This meant that if Force India wasn’t in the code, which it was not, Lotus was the last team they were looking for. 

“Nice. Well spotted,” Romain smiled as he collected the four tokens they needed from the box. Now they just had to get them in the right order. 

Still on line three, Seb had just finished his third order as Romain and Sergio discussed the Lotus token. Assuming Sauber had been wrong, he placed McLaren, Red Bull, Ferrari then Lotus on his board. Nico was sitting on a stool, swinging his legs in a bored fashion. Seb had all four teams but none in the right place. He looked down the board, trying to see some order, but there wasn’t one. What he did know was Red Bull was in the wrong place. Either Ferrari or McLaren was correct on one of the lines. He decided to try McLaren on the first row position first. He looked over to see Romain and Sergio discussing something, pointing at the board. He had caught back up, it was now about who could solve it fastest. 

Sergio and Romain placed Lotus then Ferrari, then McLaren and then Red Bull. Seb placed Red Bull then Ferrari then Lotus then McLaren. The yellow team had two in the correct place and four correct teams whereas the red team had four correct teams and none in the right place. Sergio and Romain passed a smile as they noticed the constant of having two in the correct place and having Red Bull and McLaren in the same position. They had cracked it. Seb now tried Ferrari in the position on the second row. He put Lotus then Red Bull then McLaren then Ferrari and stepped back whilst Romain was still collecting their third counter. Seb smiled but it slid off his face when the ranger wrote that he had one in the right place and four correct teams. This was impossible. He tried looking at it but he was too aware of the competition beside him. He couldn’t see clearly what he needed to do. Sergio and Romain stood back happily as they finished placing the tokens in the correct order. Four correct teams in four correct positions. The rangers slid the camp names off the top of the boards and revealed the correct code, the same for both of them. Ferrari, Lotus, McLaren and Red Bull. Romain was so happy they had won. He turned to Sergio but instead of being offered a hug, the Mexican held up his hand. Romain took the high five. 

“Oh…” Seb said, looking up at the answer. They had lost. It felt very hollow. 

“Unlucky, Seb,” Sergio said, looking over at the red teams board. He had got himself confused that was clear. He had bypassed over two correct positions and ignored them. Sebastian shrugged. 

“Considering we have the food tonight I only thought it was fair to let you get the treat,” He smiled. 

“Sure.” Romain said in a sarcastic, jokey tone. They all shook hands and Nico hopped off his stool. 

“Are we done now?” Nico questioned. Seb rolled his eyes and passed Nico his water bottle. 

“See you later guys!” They all called as they disappeared off to their separate camps. Nico and Seb were stopped first by the interviewer. 

“It was difficult for me because I didn’t know what we were supposed to be doing. I ended up just handing Sebi the tokens.” Nico shrugged. 

“Yeah, I know the game. I have played it before. I just got myself confused, I felt like I needed to get ahead of Romain and Sergio and then I couldn’t see the patterns from the lines before. It is a bit disappointing to loose, yes,” Seb said, looking over to Nico. 

“But we tried our best so that’s OK,” Nico finished. Seb just nodded, giving a little laugh. “What?” Nico asked as they walked away. 

“If Sergio hadn’t had noticed the pattern from the beginning that we had missed I think Seb may have got us on that one.” Romain said, draping his arm around Sergio’s shoulder and pulling the young Mexican closer. Sergio blushed in Romain’s hold. 

“He did seem to know the game. It’s nice to bring some food back to camp though, considering it will only be rice and beans tonight,” Sergio added. 

“Rice, beans, bread and jam,” Romain corrected, letting the Mexican go. 

“Right.” Sergio agreed and the interviewer let them go into camp. 

“How was it?” Mark called. The quietness of camp had been suffocating. Rather than attempt to talk, Lewis and Felipe had remained so quiet Mark had almost forgotten what voices sounded like. 

“We won!” Sergio smiled as they entered camp. There was a cheer from the three remaining men and the silence was happily broken. Romain and Sergio explained what the trial had entailed and what they had won. Everyone was happy. The mood wasn’t affected much by the loss in Crock Creak, as they knew they had their dinner coming. Seb was a little downbeat by the loss. 

Fernando was eating another leaf absent-mindedly, Jenson was warming the pan of the fire, ready for dinner and Nico was using the mirror to check his hair. In the odd silence from the camp, Kimi moved over and sat next to Seb, who was watching Jenson with sad eyes. Kimi nudged Seb with his shoulder but still the young German did not move. 

“Hey.” Kimi said in a compassionate tone that made Seb look round surprised. “You’re sad.” Seb sighed, turning back to the fire. 

“Good observation that,” Seb muttered sarcastically. Kimi leant forwards and mirrored Seb’s sitting position. He turned to face him. As they conversed, they spoke in lowered voices so the rest of the camp did not pick up their conversation. 

“I thought we told you not to do that.” Kimi said in that same, odd tone. Seb frowned. “Be sad.” Seb sighed again. 

“I have a chance to win something. Prove myself in sorts, and I lost.” Kimi blinked. 

“Was not a big thing you lost.” 

“I still lost, Kimi. The public will probably think I’m stupid or something…”

“Will not. They have seen what you can do before.” Kimi said, trying to make Seb smile. He always liked it when Seb smiled. But the German wasn’t giving anything today. “Look, You are very competitive. You over analysis everything and that is what makes you a good driver. One of the best. Who else in these camps can sit here and say ‘I have four world championships’?” Seb blushed but a smile played at the edge of his lips. “You have to be proud of yourself; you have achieved a lot. And you’re still so young. So what if you didn’t win bread and jam? At some point, you will have the chance to win all the meals and you will. Because you can, because you won’t stop until you do and because you are determined enough to get it done.” Kimi slid closer to Seb and wrapped his arm around the German’s shoulders, pulling him close. “Don’t beat yourself up, yeah? You loose this one but you win the rest of them.” Seb nodded and wiped the single tear that had run free on his face. He snuggled into the Finn’s hold and relaxed. Kimi didn’t let go. 

“Food!” Nico called, pointing upwards as the bag descended into camp. With one final reassuring squeeze, Kimi unwrapped himself from Seb and headed over to help Fernando detach the bag and see what Jenson had won. Seb thought over what Kimi had said. He had never heard the Finn say so many words at one time. It was odd. But the smile Kimi had given him… That was imprinted on the back of his eyelids. It filled him with a warm, bubbly feeling. Seb’s mood massively improved from that point. He followed Kimi closer to the fire. 

“Drivers,” Fernando read as Kimi and Jenson unpacked the bag. “Due to Jenson winning ‘Up To Your Neck In It’ this afternoon-” A small cheer was heard and Jenson gave a bow. “-You have got Lamb kidneys, assorted vegetables-”

“-Lamb kidney?” Nico questioned. Fernando nodded his head. 

“Yeah, they’re nice. I’ve had them before,” Jenson said. Nico shrugged and Fernando continued. His eyes widened at what they had been given for desert. There was no way this was a coincidence. He tried to hold back a laugh as he spoke, keeping his eyes fixed on the laminate in his hand. He couldn’t look at Jenson. 

“And bananas and chocolate.” Fernando said, his voice failing him at the end of his sentence. 

“No way.” Jenson said. Fernando risked a look at him and nodded. It was a mistake. Both Jenson and he fought against the laughter that wanted to shake their systems and their eyes fell on Seb. He was looking at the floor, blushing. Jenson stood, grabbing the pile of trays. “Well if… Err… If Kimi and Seb. Or whoever.” Jenson coughed. “Start by putting the kidneys in the pan, it should be hot enough now… I’m going to wash these… Just… Yeah…” Jenson dashed off towards the creak with everyone but Fernando frowning after him.

“Wait! Jenson wait! I’ll come and help!” Fernando yelled as he caught up to the Brit, leaving the others to deal with the food. Jenson stopped and waited for Fernando just out of earshot of the camp. They both fell into fits of laughter. Poor Seb. 

“Mate! That is not a coincidence,” Jenson laughed, filling the first tray with water. Fernando handed him the soap as he collect the towel to dry them. 

“You think they heard?” Fernando questioned through a smirk. 

“Of course. Ahh, I feel sorry for him,”

“Me too… Still very funny though; I couldn’t even look at you when I read it.”

“I know. Aww… Poor Sebi.” Jenson sighed, looking over to Fernando and exchanging a smile. When the two of them returned to camp, Nico was still curled in the seat he had been in when they left and Kimi was sitting on a log watching Seb push the kidneys around the pan. Seb had an uncomfortable expression on his face with confused Fernando and Jenson. That was until they could hear what Nico was talking about. 

“Or we could melt the chocolate and make like a fondant and then dip pieces of the banana in it!” Nico exclaimed as Fernando and Jenson put the plates down on a log. Kimi looked over to them with bored eyes. 

“Nico has lots of plans for the bananas,” Kimi said in a monotone. Fernando moved over to sit next to the Finn as Jenson crossed to help Seb. 

“We’ll sort that out later,” Fernando said, taking a seat. Nico was already fantasising about chocolate covered bananas and wasn’t going to let Fernando stop him. Kimi was frowning at Seb’s clear uncomfortableness. 

“But what if-?”

“-Later, Nico.” Fernando repeated. Nico pouted. “Just… Think of it in your head and tell us later,” Not a lot more was said around camp until they had all finished eating. There were all too focused on not burning the food and waiting patiently. Once they had the food, each of them tried to take their time, savouring the blend of flavours Jenson had created by cooking the kidney and rice together and then adding the vegetables. However much they tried to savour their ration of food, it was all eaten too quickly. They decided the best thing to do with the bananas was to cut them open and put chocolate inside them and then cook them for a moment to let the chocolate melt. Nico was all up for it and everyone else agreed. 

They each prepared their own banana and Jenson kept watch of them in the fire. Fernando deliberately left some of his chocolate out of the banana so he could eat it whilst he waited. A few minutes later Jenson extracted them from the fire and handed them out. Nico and Fernando’s came out first and Jenson placed them messily into their trays. Nico’s was oozing with chocolate and he eyed it in awe. Jenson handed Seb his before realising it had actually been Kimi’s.

“Shit. Sorry, Seb, that’s Kimi’s banana,” Jenson said without thinking about it. Fernando choked a little on his mouthful of banana. Jenson’s eyes grew wide in horror and Seb blushed. Nico and Kimi were none the wiser of the change. 

“Is OK. You have that one.” Kimi said, smiling over to Seb. Jenson and Fernando exchanged a look. 

“It’s alright, Kimi. His is here,” Jenson said, lifting the second tray in his hand that held Seb’s banana. Seb’s cheeks were turning redder and Jenson cursed himself for being stupid enough to let this happen. 

“I’ll have his.” Kimi stated, reaching for Seb’s banana.

“Sure? Because I really don’t mind having-” Seb started in a low voice. Kimi cut across him taking the tray from Jenson. 

“-Is fine.” Kimi smiled taking his seat again. Seb sheepishly took a seat beside him and all five of them sat eating there bananas. Jenson looked over to Fernando. That could have gone worse. 

\- - - 

Felipe was shocked when he was called to go off for his Clash of the Camps trial mainly because it was late and the darkness was falling. Why he had to leave camp now was beyond him. He got up without a word and, collecting his water bottle on the way, headed out of camp. Calls of good luck followed him. When he finally reached the trial clearing he noticed Jenson placing his water bottle down on a red bed and frowning around at his surroundings. 

“I didn’t expect to see you here,” Felipe called, making the Brit turn and look at him. A smile spread onto his face. 

“Can’t quite say the same for you, mate,” Jenson smiled, shaking Felipe’s hand. The Brazilian laughed as his eyes fell on the two beds, one red one yellow. 

“I take it we are staying the night?” Felipe queried. 

“Looks like it,” Jenson said. They both moved over to the post bearing the instructions. Jenson looked around the area whilst Felipe read aloud. There were the two beds in the middle with an orange light in between the two heads. At the foot of each was a small box that looked like it had been pulled off a cash machine, bearing numbers. At the opposite end of the arena there were two old fashioned London telephone boxes and running down both edges were five boxes with buttons on the top. Jenson listened as Felipe read. 

“Drivers, in this challenge, the orange light with go off and you will have to race to your designated telephone and call your camp. You will then have to memorise the nine-digit code they read to you and type it into your pin box. Whichever campmate gets the code the fastest will win the luxury item in their box.” Felipe looked at Jenson. It seemed pretty clear to them both. The orange light would give them a signal, they would press one of the buttons on the box to select it to be played for and then call camp, get the code and type it into their pin box. 

“Simple enough,” Jenson smiled. Felipe nodded. “So I guess, we’ve started then?” Jenson looked around again but there was no one here but the two of them. It was very different from the trial he had done earlier that day. Both Felipe and he sat themselves on their designated bed and began to talk about the different camps, the group dynamics. Jenson didn’t get a chance to say much as Felipe got on a rant about Lewis. The orange light interrupted him. Both drivers hopped up and selected a box. Jenson picked five. Felipe picked one. 

“Best of luck,” Jenson said as he dove into his telephone box. 

“And you,” Felipe replied, shutting his door and picking up the receiver. 

“Hello?” Fernando’s confused voice sounded in Jenson’s ear. 

“Hey, Fer. It’s Jenson. Do you have a code there?” Jenson asked, offering no time for an explanation. Fernando picked up on this vibe and turned to look at the screen that had been put in camp. 

“Yeah.”

“Ok, can you just read it to me? Don’t stop, just read it on a loop,” Jenson said, shutting his eyes and placing his spare hand over the ear that wasn’t pressed to the phone. 

“Who are you against?” Sergio asked casually. Felipe was growing impatient rapidly. 

“Jenson, but I don’t have time. I need you to-”

“-Really? I wouldn’t have thought he would have been best for that…”

“Sergio, can you see a code?”

“Huh? Oh! Yeah, have you got a pen, it’s quite-”

“-Just read it to me. Three digits at a time.”

Both Felipe and Jenson were concentrating on the numbers they were being told. It seemed that once they thought they had got it they couldn’t remember the last few digits. Jenson found a pattern in this code first and when he successfully repeated it back to Fernando the Spaniard told him to go. Felipe rushed out of his telephone box just as Jenson was typing in the first number. 3-9-5-6-2-0-8-8-3. Both Felipe and Jenson looked up at their line of boxes. But it was Jenson’s that turned green. Felipe’s turned a deep red, showing he had lost that box. 

“Unlucky,” Jenson said, catching Felipe’s shoulder. Felipe nodded as they both took their seats back on their beds. 

“Still four to play for,” Felipe commented. 

“Nice attitude,” Jenson smiled, he was glad that Felipe still had some fight in him. It would have been boring if he didn’t. The next signal took a long time to come. Felipe had been hoping that it would be quick and he could go back to camp. But it was becoming clear now that the beds were here for a reason; they were going to stay here all night. 

“Tired?” Felipe asked as Jenson yawned. Jenson tried to stifle it. 

“Nope. I’m not going to sleep in this thing; God knows what they would drop on me…” Felipe hadn’t thought of that. 

“But they said earlier there were no bugs, not from the first trial.”

“Doesn’t mean there won’t be any for us,” Jenson sighed, feeling the fatigue seeping into his muscles. He had had a long day. It was a good forty-five minutes to and hour and a half before the orange light went off again, signalling them to call the camps. Jenson picked box one and Felipe selected box two.

“Did you get it?” Fernando asked Jenson. 

“Yeah. One down. Got the code?”

“Yeah…”

“Ready?” Romain asked Felipe without the Brazilian having to say a word. Felipe was impressed. 

“For sure. Go.” Each of them got the codes at the same time, though Jenson was a step ahead when they left the telephone boxes. There was more pressure this time because they were so close. They had to remember the code, and get it right, and not panic that the other person would do it faster. 1-2-7-9-5-6-0-4-4. They both looked up again and waited the few seconds before Jenson’s box lit green. Felipe’s second was matching the colour of the first. Jenson exhaled. 

“That was tougher,” Jenson sighed. Felipe was a little annoyed at himself. He was determined to get at least one of these boxes. Jenson sat back on his bed, but Felipe paced around the space. There was little conversation in this gap and Jenson could tell it was getting to him he hadn’t won one yet. But Jenson wasn’t going to let him win the boxes; he was playing for the items for his camp. He knew that he had Jess’ blanket as his luxury item and Fernando had been mad they wouldn’t let him bring in a certain top as they had claimed that it was luxury. Jenson was curious about the top, so much so he really wanted to win it. Nico had some hair gel, Seb had a neck comforter and Kimi had his famous sunglasses. Jenson wanted to win the lot. 

Felipe was a bit more selfish in the sense that he wouldn’t care if he only left the trial with one box as long as it was his. He had a picture of Raffaella and Felipinho as his luxury item and he wanted that. He didn’t care for the others things really, but he would definitely try and play for them. Romain’s photo pillow with pictures of his family on it, Sergio’s playing cards, Mark’s notebook and Lewis’ razor. He had already lost two and hoped he had lost Sergio’s and Lewis’; they seemed to be the ones to hold the least sentimental value. He wasn’t sure about Mark’s book. 

After what felt like hours, Jenson nodded off for a moment and was awoken by the flash of orange light. Felipe gave his shoulder a nudge to make sure he was awake, but Jenson nodded as he stumbled sleepily off his bed and selected box number four. Felipe took box number three. Felipe waited to here the next voice, knowing it would either be Mark’s or Lewis’. 

“Fernando? Can you got the code?” Jenson said, rubbing his eyes tiredly. He needed to focus; he needed this box. 

“Yeah. Are you OK?”

“Go. Go. Read it to me.” Jenson said, waving his arm out and dismissing Fernando’s question. 

“Ready, Felipe?” Mark asked. It was late, and very obviously so. Mark hadn’t been tired, he had been thinking about Fernando. 

“Yes.” Felipe said, screwing his eyes shut. 

“Seven, six, four, two, nine, eight, five, three, five,” Fernando said. Jenson began to mouth along the numbers with him. “Seven, six, four, two, nine, eight… Cinco, three, five,” 

“What? What the hell is thinko?” Jenson said, his eyes flying open in confusion. 

“Shit. Sorry. Is Spanish,” Fernando supressed a yawn. “Five, three-”

“-Start again. From the beginning.” Jenson interrupted, his patience shortened by his tiredness. Fernando spoke a little slower, making sure he was talking in English.

“Seven. Six. Four. Two. Nine-”

“-Fuck!” Jenson yelled as cockroaches were poured on his head. He had lost track of the numbers, the sudden crawling confusing him. 

“Jense? Are you-?”

“-From the beginning!” He growled down the line as he flicked the tiny creatures from his neck. 

“…Two, nine, Ahh! You bastards… eight-” Felipe was reciting the numbers back to Mark when his cockroaches were dropped on his head. 

“-What? Who are bastards?” Mark asked with a smile. 

“They dropped cockroaches on me.”

“Nice.”

“They smell shit.”

“Recite it back and get out of there.” Mark instructed. Mark gave Felipe the all clear and the Brazilian dashed out of his box. He noticed that Jenson was still on his phone, fighting with bugs. Felipe entered the code calmly. 7-6-4-2-9-8-5-3-5. 

“Fuck it, Fernando, he’s already put in the code.” Jenson spat as he slammed down the receiver. As he stepped out of his box Felipe’s third box turned green whereas his box with the number four on it turned red. “Well done,” Jenson said, brushing more bugs from his back. Felipe did a little happy dance when Jenson wasn’t looking so as to not rub it in his face. 

“Thank you. I was not expecting the bugs. For sure, this is a surprise.”

“Yeah, I thought they would put them in our beds,” Jenson said. He went to lie down on the red bed but stopped himself. He wasn’t going to risk falling asleep again and not being ready for the next code. 

“What took so long?” Felipe asked, folding his arms in curiosity. 

“Fernando started speaking fucking Spanish.” Jenson seethed. 

“He is tired, for sure. Just like us,” Felipe said, trying to be reassuring. Jenson exhaled and let a small smile fall on his lips. 

“You don’t look very tired,” Jenson commented. Felipe shrugged. The Brazilian was about to answer when the orange light signalled them to move again. They both looked at each other momentarily before running to their boxes, Jenson picking two and Felipe picking four, before they dove into their telephone boxes. 

“Sorry,” Jenson said before Fernando could speak. 

“Is OK, I know I messed up,”

“No I’m sorry, you’re just as tired as me, and it’s OK.” He paused momentarily but when Fernando didn’t reply he pressed on. “Alright. Let’s have that code.”

“Got the last one,” Felipe said.

“Excellent, mate,” Mark replied. Felipe frowned. 

“I though Lewis would do one?”

“Yeah, he’s asleep. I tried to wake him but he’s asleep. Doesn’t matter, not like I’m sleeping anyway.”

“This is unfair.”

“He’s had a long day. It’s OK mate. Ready for this code?”

Both Jenson and Felipe expected the bugs this time, so when the crickets were piled on top of them neither of them flinched. Jenson panicked that he could loose another box, so he didn’t recite the numbers back to Fernando and ran for his pin box. He got there a little time before Felipe and took a deep breath. 0-0-4-5-9-2-6…. Six…. Or was it five-three-five? No, that was the last code. What came after the six? Jenson couldn’t remember the last two digits. Felipe had just started to put in his code. Jenson took a random guess, hoping he was right. Felipe typed in 0-0-4-5-9-2-6-3-1 with ease. They both turned to look at their boxes. Felipe’s went green. Jenson was more annoyed at himself for rushing away from Fernando. He would have probably had time to recite the numbers. That was another box lost. 

Jenson was sure they passed into the next morning by time the orange light went off for the last time. Bored and trying to keep himself awake, Jenson was running from his pin box to his telephone box and back again. Felipe was sitting on his bed, watching him. It was odd how everything seemed so interesting at this state of tiredness. But they were both determined to get that last box. When the flash of light crossed Felipe’s face, both of them looked at it for a moment as if they had forgotten what it meant. Within a blink of an eye they both dove for their last button, Felipe box five and Jenson box three, and ran into their telephone boxes. When Fernando picked up the phone Jenson was quieter than usual. 

“Hello?” Fernando asked, wondering how many more codes he was going to have to read. His head was getting foggy. Still some moments of quiet. “Jenson? Hello?”

“Why is it always you picking up the phone?” Jenson asked casually. Fernando frowned, confused. 

“What?”

“You, I’ve only spoken to you tonight. Where are the others?”

“Do you want this code?”

“In a minute.” There was a pause when Jenson waited for Fernando to speak. He didn’t. “Are they all asleep?”

“Are you not worried about the others getting the code first?”

“Nah. There still bickering about something or other, we’ve got time.” Jenson said, leaning against the phone. “So why is it always you?”

“I’m not so tired, the others wanted to sleep. You need my help.”

“Apart from when you start speaking Spanish, yeah,” Jenson joked and he heard Fernando laugh down the line. “And I don’t believe for a second you’re not tired. There is another reason.”

“No other reason,” Fernando lied innocently. Jenson rolled his eyes. 

“I know a lot more than you think, mate” Jenson said, the implication of Mark too clear in his voice. Fernando swallowed. 

“So who is bickering?” Fernando asked, changing the subject. Jenson moved the earpiece away for a moment to listen to Felipe yelling something about priorities down the line. 

“Felipe and probably Lewis. Do you know how much your teammate can bitch?”

“Yes. Am very aware.” Fernando said in a bored tone. He had had enough of Felipe’s bitching all year. How his car wasn’t working or how the team were helping Fernando more than himself ever since he announced he was going to Williams. About how he had given six years to a team who were throwing it in his face. Fernando had thought Felipe was being over dramatic but he never said anything. Just let Felipe bitch. It was the easiest way. 

“So this Seb thing…” Jenson started, bringing Fernando’s attention back to the jungle. “Do you reckon its two way?”

“With Kimi? You can’t tell anything with Kimi,” Fernando shrugged. 

“Yeah. Good luck with that next year,”

“We will be fine. We both want the same thing,”

“That’s why I’m wishing you luck,” Jenson smiled. “But you saw him before dinner with Seb,”

“I saw how much what ever he said picked up Seb’s mood, yes,” Fernando nodded. 

“I don’t know; they’ve always been close. Maybe closer than we all thought…”

“Maybe we will find out over the next few weeks?”

“Maybe…” Jenson looked over at Felipe who still seemed to be arguing down the line. “Alright, lets have this code then.”

“Have they stopped arguing?”

“Nah, but we may as well put them out of their misery.” Jenson shrugged. He concentrated on Fernando’s voice feeling relaxed and calm. It was nice to know they had a lot of time. “Aha! Nice try!” Jenson said, pointing upwards. Fernando was puzzled. 

“What?”

“They tried to drop these mealworms on me but I dodged them,” 

“Oh good… Do you need me to repeat the code?”

“Three-seven-two-four-eight-eight-seven-thinko-zero” Jenson said with a wink as he poorly repeated Fernando’s Spanish fumbled from earlier. 

“All yours, bring back the goods,” Fernando smiled and Jenson hung up the phone. As Jenson left his own telephone box he saw Felipe had not been so lucky with the mealworms and was frantically brushing them from his hair. Jenson was about to start typing in the code when Felipe’s yell made him jump.

“JUST READ ME THE FUCKING CODE!” Felipe seethed, his voice slightly muffled by his confinement in the telephone box. Jenson laughed slightly at the mental image of a defiant Lewis on the end of the line, tired and not understanding Felipe’s urgency. He pushed in the code 3-7-2-4-8-8-7-5-0 and watched as his final box turned green. Felipe emerged at the sound of the klaxon looking extremely pissed off. 

“How you put up with him as a teammate…” Felipe fumed as he brushed more bugs from his shoulder. Jenson gave a breathy laugh as he placed a hand on Felipe’s shoulder and shook his other with the Brazilian. 

“You get used to him,” Jenson said, releasing the Brazilian. “You got two though, that’s not bad.” Felipe nodded as a ranger appeared from within the bushes. He stood in front of them, waiting. He reminded Jenson of the Stig off of Top Gear. “Err… Ok…”

“Shall we look at mine first?” Felipe asked Jenson, but the ranger took it as a sign to open Felipe’s two green boxes. The boxes had red plaques inside that had the item they had won written on them. In box number three was Romain’s pillow, which made Felipe smile. Box number four held Felipe’s photo. Not too bad in his opinion. Sergio had his leaf-cards, he was sure Mark wouldn’t mind not having his book and he was glad he had lost Lewis’ razor after the sham he had made of giving the last code. They crossed the area to look in Jenson’s boxes. 

Box number one held Jenson’s blanket. He was happy about that because it was the blanket Jess took away with her when she went abroad for shoots. He felt like he had a little piece of her with him. Box number three held Fernando’s shirt and he was happy he had won Fernando’s item simply because of all the help the Spaniard had been. Not to mention he was curious about it. And finally, box number five held Kimi’s sunglasses. Both Felipe and Jenson laughed at that box. Seeing the Finn clan in sunglasses was all the camp needed for everything to feel normal again. Jenson wasn’t took worried about the Germans; Nico seemed to be surviving fine without his hair gel and Sebastian had Kimi who could comfort his neck. They both congratulated each other and moved out to collect their prizes. 

“It wasn’t easy, especially as it got later. You’re just getting more and more tired and it gets harder to concentrate on the numbers you’re being told.” Jenson said as he carried his things towards camp and was stopped by an interviewer. “Fernando was really great on his end so I suppose we worked together to win this stuff. I think people will be happy with the result.”

Fernando had woken everyone up so when Jenson arrived in camp he had everyone’s sleepy attention. Jenson explained what he had to do and whom he was up against before letting them all know he was playing for luxury items. 

“Now, I won three out of five, which means Nico and Seb, I don’t have your items. I’m really sorry, we tried our best but it just wasn’t possible.”

“It’s alright, I understand, Jenson. You did your best,” Nico smiled appearing relieved. Jenson couldn’t work out why he would be relieved about not having his hair gel but he shrugged it off, not feeling quite so bad. Seb needed reminding what his luxury item was. So it had been a pretty successful challenge in his opinion. The look on Kimi’s face was priceless when Jenson produced his sunglasses – which he had hidden under his blanket. Kimi stood and kissed Jenson. The Brit was so shocked he just stood there and let it happen. Fernando and Nico laughed as Seb tried his hardest to look like he was also amused and not wanting to kill Jenson. 

“Right.” Jenson said when Kimi let him go. The Finn sat back down next to Seb and put on his sunglasses even though it was dark. His entire posture relaxed as he laid his head on Seb’s shoulder. Sebastian completely forgot about hating Jenson, too happy to have Kimi in such close proximity. Jenson laid his blanket out on his bed before moving over to Fernando and handing him the plain white round neck shirt. Fernando looked down at it as if he were dreaming. 

“You helped a lot,” Jenson smiled. Fernando looked up at him. 

“You pick this?” 

“No, coincidence. Just happened to be in one of the boxes we won.” Jenson handed it to Fernando and Fernando just looked at it in his hands. “But you really did help so thanks. Without you I don’t know how many we would have won.”

“Maybe one more if I hadn’t-”

“-I told you to forget that, we’re all allowed to make mistakes. And besides, I learnt my first piece of Spanish today,” Jenson smiled and Fernando returned it, beaming like a child in a candy shop. Jenson moved closer to Fernando so he could mutter in his ear. “Now go to sleep. You look shattered.”

“But-”

“-He would tell you to as well,” Jenson added, leaning back. Fernando nodded and crossed over to his bed. He snuggled down into its welcoming warmth and fell asleep quickly with the white shirt pressed to his face. 

“I think Jenson did very well. A couple were close, but initially he got the hang of it quicker than me.” Felipe said to his interviewer, trying to keep his face in view as well as manoeuvring Romain’s pillow. “It helped when Fernando started speaking Spanish and Jenson couldn’t understand. I think Mark was best at helping me. He was clear and decisive. Both of the boxes I won were with him. So that was good. But I think I am bringing home the most important two, as these will remind us of home. Hopefully the other will be alright”

“I got two.” Felipe called into camp as he returned. Mark and Lewis were sitting by the fire whilst Romain and Sergio were asleep. 

“Better than none,” Mark called back. He turned his gaze to Lewis who was still looking angry and had folded his arms. “Just let it go, we’re all tired and we all understand that,” Mark muttered. 

“He’ll still blame me. I bet you anything he comes back as says ‘would have been three if Lewis didn’t cock it up’” Lewis sighed. 

“He’s not a baby,”

“You’ve heard what Rob calls him,” Lewis muttered and Mark rolled his eyes. Lewis had felt bad he had missed his go at answering the phone so was determined to answer the fifth call. Felipe sat down in front of them, creating a triangular seating arrangement between them. 

“For sure, better than none. But it would have been three if Lewis didn’t cock it up,” Felipe said. Mark rolled his eyes again and Lewis deflated. 

“We’re a team. We have to work together. Lewis tried his best as I am sure you did.” Felipe went to open his mouth but Mark continued, giving him a look that told him to drop it. “So what did you get?”

“My photo and Romain’s pillow,” Felipe said, setting his photo next to his bed. Mark smiled. 

“That’s good. The most important two, I suppose,” Lewis said. Felipe looked at him a little shocked.

“Is what I said,”

“So you agree on something?” Mark joked. Felipe moved over to Romain and moved his arms so they were wrapped around his pillow. A small smiled glittered on Romain’s lips as he pulled the pillow closer. It made Felipe feel good. 

“To be honest, Jenson was really good. He just understood what he needed to do.” He turned to Lewis. “What I am saying is, for sure, it was annoying to not be able to try, but I reckon even if we had got the code we would not have won the third box.” Lewis nodded his thanks to Felipe and Mark sighed in relief. An apology. Maybe things could work themselves out now. 

“Did you see what he won?” Mark asked, relaxing back into his seat and closing his eyes. Fatigue was staring to burn through him and he could happily fall asleep here again tonight.

“Yeah, His blanket, Kimi’s sunglasses-”

“-Ha! I bet his face was a picture on receiving them,” Mark laughed. Lewis smiled at the mental image. 

“Yeah. And then Fernando’s shirt.” Mark said up opening his eyes. Fernando got his shirt? Mark let a smile spread across his face. 

“Really?”

“Yeah, Jenson said they took it off him because it was classed as luxury. He was pretty pissed about them taking it. Jenson was happy he got it back.” Mark laughed again. Of course it would be classed as luxury. It was something that could remind him of home, outside of the jungle. Mark settled back down, happy again. He was glad Fernando had the shirt Mark had given him before they left for the jungle. He had given it to Fernando as a reminder because Fernando had been panicking they would be separated. Mark smiled at the memory as he fell pleasantly into a deep sleep. Lewis and Felipe bid each other good night, leaving Mark where he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE IS NO BUSH TUCKER VOTE FOR THE NEXT PART
> 
> Rating votes will close on Sunday 8th December at 10:00pm UK time. 
> 
> Please keep voting for the two new drivers you wish to see in the jungle (even if you have already voted for these things you may vote again on this chapter, your vote will be counted). The closing date for the drivers WILL BE EXTENDED. More details at the end of the next chapter
> 
> SO FAR the relationships that will be seen are:
> 
> Fernando/Mark  
> Kimi/Seb  
> Jenson/Nico  
> Jenson/Lewis
> 
> Please keep voting and thank you for reading.


	5. Day Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, everyone gets their wish.

Mark woke up with an aching neck for the second morning in a row. He blinked his eyes, dazed momentarily by the bright morning sun, and focused on his surroundings. Sitting himself up, he rubbed the back of his neck. There was silence all around him; everyone else was still asleep. He looked up towards the sun again, trying to gather some concept of what the time was. He really wished he had a watch. Camp was weird when it was quiet, but as Mark stood himself up, he felt a strange sense of inevitability. It was too quiet and it was unnerving him. He collected his wash things and clothes and headed down to the creak. 

For the first time since he had entered the camp, Mark felt well rested. He stretched the stiffness out of his muscles and cupped water in his hands, splashing it over his face. He looked up into the small mirror that was hanging off a branch as the water ran down his face. He could already see he needed a shave. Maybe not shaving before he came into the jungle had been a bad idea. His fingers tingled as he ran them through the short stubble of hair across his chin. He sighed, drying his face. It was still eerily quiet when he dressed and returned to camp and, assuming they were all still asleep, Mark poured himself a mug of water and tilted his head from side to side, stretching his sore muscles. He settled himself by the fire again and watched the birds fly through the trees a little distance away. 

“What is this?” Romain asked. He had been lying on the pillow someone had obviously placed in his grip last night and looking at Mark. Mark jumped, nearly spilling water down himself as Romain sat up. 

“Shit mate… I thought you were asleep,” Mark breathed, placing his free hand over his heart. Romain shook his head and tilted the pillow towards Mark. 

“This is?”

“Your luxury item. Felipe won it last night. You were asleep when he got back, I guess he wanted to give it to you,” Mark shrugged watching the Frenchman. Romain smiled down at the pillow before lying on it again, hugging it close. It had a montage of pictures from the first four months of his son’s life. Pictures of his wife. It was the best reminder of home. He watched Mark. 

“Did you get yours?”

“Me? Nah. But it wasn’t that important,” Mark smiled. Romain felt a little bad and subconsciously pulled his pillow closer. 

“Then how did I get mine?” Romain asked, confused. 

“He won two of the five boxes. He got yours and his own item.”

“Oh…” 

“It’s alright; they were the most important to get.” Mark smiled as he got up and made a start on breakfast. Romain smiled. 

Everyone was already awake and around the fire when Fernando got up. Even Nico. They all watched him tiredly stumble over to them, pulling on the white shirt Jenson won for him yesterday. Kimi and Seb were trying out frying the beans under Jenson’s instructions whilst Nico talked about how good the bananas were last night. Fernando sat down next to Jenson and was handed his red sleeveless fleece with his name and number on the back. He pulled it on over his white shirt and brought the white material up around his face, leaning back onto Seb’s bed. 

“Sleep well?” Jenson smiled over to the Spaniard. Fernando nodded taking a deep breath of the smell that emulated from his shirt. Jenson patted his shoulder before instructing for the rice to be put on the heat. 

“So what do we reckon today? Who will be up for the trial?” Seb asked, sitting back on his heels. Fernando frowned. 

“It could be any of us… Maybe Nico or Seb?” Jenson suggested

“What did I do to deserve the trial?” Nico said, in outrage. 

“You haven’t done one yet,”

“Neither has Fernando,” Nico pouted. Kimi rolled his eyes, taking the spoon from Seb to move the beans as the German’s attention had diverted to the conversation. 

“Yeah… But-”

“-You don’t think they will vote him?” 

“Fernando is tougher than you.” Kimi said bluntly. Nico turned to face the Finn. 

“Who told you that?” Kimi focused on moving the beans. 

“Can see.”

“To be honest it could be any of us,” Seb cut in, preventing the argument from going any further. 

“But Kimi and I have not done our Camp trial yet… Maybe there will not be a bush trial?” Fernando said, lifting his head before hiding it back under the collar of his fleece. 

“Makes sense.” Kimi nodded, looking over to Fernando. 

“So you don’t reckon there is a trial?” Nico asked Fernando who shrugged in reply. The camp went quiet for a little while and they ate their breakfast in silence. When the presenters did not show up to announce who would be doing a trial they all assumed that Fernando had guessed right. Kimi moved over to sit next to Fernando as Seb dragged Nico off his arse to help with the washing up. 

“Looks like you and I are getting the food.” Kimi said, mirroring Fernando and leaning back, looking up at the canopy above them. 

“It does appear to be that way.” Fernando nodded. 

“Good practice for next year.” Kimi said more to himself than Fernando. Fernando frowned at him. 

“What do you mean by this?”

“For Ferrari next year. Working together now is good practice.” Fernando smiled at Kimi.

“We will be fine next year,” Fernando sighed, looking back up at the canopy. Kimi sat up and turned to Fernando seriously. 

“I know how Felipe is as a teammate. Is a team player… I will not let you win.” Kimi said. It was better Fernando knew this before hand than getting to next season and having a shock. Fernando just smiled, not turning to the Finn. 

“Am very aware of this,” Fernando said. “Am looking forwards to the challenge.”

“And I will not move for you.”

“Am aware,” Fernando turned to face Kimi again. “Why are you saying this?”

“I want you to be aware. Not be shocked.”

“I don’t think anything you could do would shock me,” Fernando smiled, patting Kimi’s shoulder. Kimi nodded and Fernando wondered what the hell his incentive was to divulge this information to him. Maybe Seb was softening him up. He was still looking forwards to the prospect of racing against Kimi, battling to be recognised as the number one of the team. He had replaced Kimi back in 2010 and he wanted to prove to Ferrari they had made the right decision. 

It was just before lunch when Mark, Lewis, Kimi and Fernando were all called to leave camp and head to the trial area. Calls of “good luck” and “do your best” were a little more desperate now as the camps assumed correctly that the last four would be battling for food. Fernando and, sort of, Kimi fell into a conversation about the championships they had won in past years. Fernando carried most of the conversation, relaying back to Kimi how it had felt in 2005 when he climbed out of his car after winning. Kimi noted how passionately Fernando spoke and it was very obvious how hungry he was for another title. And it was also clear he wanted to get that title with Ferrari. Fernando’s voice faded off as they neared the trial area. He tried to calm his breathing. 

Mark and Lewis entered the small lake bank from the opposite end to Fernando and Kimi and it took everything in the Spaniard’s will power to not rush across and throw his arms around Mark’s neck. It had been too long since he had seen him and Fernando couldn’t help but smile when he saw Mark. He had swapped his white shirt for his green vest with his number and name on the back in case the trial let something happen to his luxury item. Eyeing the two red and two yellow body height bags hanging above the lake, he was glad he changed. 

Lewis went straight to greeting Fernando first with a firm shake of the hand, leaving Kimi to smile at Mark, also shaking his hand. When Lewis turned to Kimi, Fernando almost frantically pulled Mark into a hug, discarding his extended hand. Mark smiled into Fernando’s hair, never wanting to let the Spaniard go again. 

“You alright mate?” Mark muttered in Fernando’s ear. Fernando shivered pleasantly at the use of Mark’s idiolect. 

“Am fine. You?”

“Fantastic.” Mark smiled. This conversation took no longer than any other friendly hug and with reluctance; Fernando let Mark pull from his grip. He couldn’t take his eyes off Mark though, the way he walked forwards and bent down to read the laminate that was pinned to the post, bearing the rules. Lewis and Kimi moved forwards to and Fernando leaned his chin on Mark’s shoulder as he began to read the rules. Subtly, hidden behind the others, Fernando linked his hand with Mark’s and was relieved when the Australian gripped back. 

“Drivers, today there is no bush tucker trial so you will be competing in Hanging Tight to win meals for camp tonight. Each driver must hold onto their allocated coloured bag for as long as they can. Last driver hanging will take the meals back to camp this evening. Good luck.” Mark’s eyes fell on the bags that were hanging about the lake. Obviously when they let go they would fall into the water. 

“So how do we get out there?” Lewis questioned. “Do we swim?”

“I think the water is a punishment for letting go,” Mark said, stepping back. Fernando moved himself from Mark’s shoulder and sighed as the Australian moved out of his grip. 

“So how do we get out there?” Fernando asked, folding his arms across his chest. Lewis and Mark were looking for some kind of way to get to the bags. It seemed to be an impossible task. Fernando just stood and watched Mark, greedily taking in his appearance and trying to remember it, as if it was about to be snatched away and it was the last time he would see him. Kimi pointed to two rangers who had appeared through the bushes and the drivers all turned to face them. Without saying anything, the rangers extracted a bridge that ran underneath the bags. Each driver moved over to their bag and climbed on. Once they were all in position, the rangers cleared out the bridge and disappeared into the bushes again. Mark and Fernando were in the middle with Kimi on Fernando’s left and Lewis on Mark’s right. 

“Has it started?” Fernando asked, frowning over towards Mark. Mark shrugged. 

“Maybe,” Mark said, though he didn’t think it had. 

“They will probably sound a klaxon,” Lewis added, and no sooner had he finished talking did a klaxon sound throughout the area. Each of them was determined to be the last man hanging. Fernando turned his face away from Mark and watched Kimi as Fernando adjusting his legs and pushing himself up the bag a little, getting a better grip. There were no handles on the bag, so they had to hang onto the slippery surface. Kimi looked bored, as if this was the thing he did every day. Fernando found his nonchalant attitude discouraging to watch and so he turned away, looking off into the trees. 

Mark was watching Fernando, noting how he could see each muscle in his arms and back working to hold onto his red bag under the loose fitting vest he wore. His eyes focused on the small flashes of Fernando’s tattoo he could see as the Spaniard moved, adjusting his position. The message of strength and power it emitted making him feel like he could hold on forever. Lewis couldn’t get a good position. As the klaxon had sounded, he had – alike Fernando – tried to get a better grip on the bag, but it had not gone so well for him. He had lost his position and could feel himself slipping. But he was determined to bring the meals back to camp. After he had failed yesterday, he was determined not to fail again. But all the determination in the world could not stop gravity. Fifteen minutes had passed. 

The splash made everyone turn around. Mark rolled his eyes at the sight of Lewis emerging from the water, splashing stupidly. Fernando smiled and Kimi returned to watching the birds. 

“Sorry man; I lost my grip,” Lewis called to Mark as he climbed out of the lake. 

“It’s alright, don’t sweat it,” Mark called back, tightening his grip on the bag. He was the only one left to win it for the yellow team and after not having any food yesterday; they could really do with the win. But Kimi and Fernando were a strong team and without the support of Lewis he felt the loss licking at his heels. His arms began to ache a little. 

“One down.” Kimi commented, more to himself than anyone else. He was playing for himself, not the red team, and so was determined to beat both Mark and Fernando. Though he was extremely bored now, just hanging on this bag. Nothing was really happening and he felt the urge to let go just so he had something to do. He looked over at Mark and Fernando who still seemed to be doing fine. Kimi sighed, rolling his eyes. Out of sheer boredom, he began swinging the bag. Fernando turned, alarmed, at the sound of the squeaking. After taking in Kimi swinging on the bag, he turned to Mark for some kind of support. Mark was trying to supress laughter so was of no use. Fernando turned back to Kimi. 

“Kimi, what the fuck are you doing?”

“Bored. Swinging.” Kimi said, continuing. Fernando looked up at the top of the bag. It looked pretty secured. But Fernando was more worried about Kimi loosing his grip. It would be hard to not let Mark win if it was left to the two of them. He would want to give the food to Mark. 

“Stop. What if you loose your grip?” Fernando said, slightly desperately. 

“I will not.”

“Think about the food, Kimi. You could loose-”

“-Yes, yes. Leave me alone. I know what I’m doing.” Kimi shot at Fernando and the Spaniard fell silent. Mark buried his face into the bag and let out a laugh. When he re-emerged, Fernando was scowling at him, letting him know the bag hadn’t muted his laugh enough. He sent Fernando an apologetic look. 

“Tired yet?” Mark asked as Fernando readjusted his hands. They had just passed thirty minutes. 

“Not at all,” Fernando said, pointing and flexing his feet. He considered dropping off his box to let Mark win at the beginning of the trial, but after seeing how easily Kimi was staying put he realised this may not in fact help Mark. So Fernando was hanging on as long as he could, trying to ignore the growing ache in his arms. 

“I’m struggling,” Mark admitted, moving on the bag. He slid down a few inches but he didn’t have the strength in his arms to pull himself up. Fernando looked over at him, seeing the anguish on his face as he tried, but failed, to regain his previous position. 

“You’re doing really well though. Think of the food, think of how happy people will be,” Fernando said. Mark gave him a look but he saw the genuine shine in Fernando’s eyes. Fernando really was trying to help him win. 

“Whose team are you on?” Kimi called, letting his bag swing to a stop. Fernando blushed over at him before turning forwards and looking at his bag. 

“It’s alright. Enjoy your meals tonight,” Mark said. Fernando turned at him confused just in time to see the Australian drop into the water. A klaxon sounded. The red team had won. Mark emerged from the water. 

“We won.” Kimi said, as if it was an obvious thing to have happened. Fernando smiled over to him. 

“Yeah. We won.” Fernando sighed tiredly. His arms were starting to really ache now. Lewis gave them a small clap from the bank, but Mark remained in the water, looking up at Fernando. 

“Well done guys. You can come off now.” Lewis called. Fernando and Kimi shared a look. 

“After you.” Fernando smiled. Kimi remained expressionless, ignoring the ache that was burning through his muscles. 

“No.” The Finn stated. Fernando frowned.

“No?”

“I will not give up. You drop if you are tired.” 

“Kimi, the game is over?” Lewis called, confused, from the bank. Kimi settled himself into a slightly more comfortable position. His arms were aching pretty badly, but he wanted to win. 

“Have not won yet.”

“Have.” Fernando frowned, catching himself as he slid slightly down his bag. The shot of pain that ran through his restraining muscles made him grit his teeth. 

“How many drivers are hanging?”

“Two.” Mark said, shaking his head, from the water. He knew where Kimi was going with this. 

“So no one has won.”

“You want to play on?” Fernando asked, through gritted teeth. Kimi nodded. Mark and Lewis shared a look. They didn’t know whether to leave or stay. Kimi and Fernando both seemed determined to be the last hanging but it was clear on Fernando’s face how much he was struggling. Kimi was as well, but no one could tell. His face was expressionless as he watched Fernando struggle. Mark got bored of seeing Fernando in pain. He reached a hand up to the Spaniard from the water. 

“Come on now, Fernando. This is stupid.” Mark said, trying to hide the pain from his voice.

“Am. Fine.” Fernando stated with gritted teeth and his face screwed into a frown. 

“Not.” Kimi said calmly. 

“You’ve proved enough mate. Just let go now.” Mark knew Fernando wasn’t one for giving up so he knew he wouldn’t just let go. Fernando was starting to slide closer to the bottom of the bag. Lewis was sitting on the bank, swinging his legs in a bored fashion. 

“Have. Not. Won.” Fernando spat. He didn’t want to loose. Not now. But he didn’t dare to look at Kimi; his calm composure would defeat him. He tried again to pull himself up on the bag, but one of his legs swung down. He breathed deeply and made to pull it back up, but Mark grabbed his ankle. “Mark. Do not-” But it was too late. The Australian gave a gentle tug on his ankle and he fell off his bag and into the water. He was furious at Mark but his anger evaded pretty quickly. Whilst under the water, he felt someone’s hand grab his wrist, drag up his aching arm to his shoulder and then cup his face. He knew it was Mark when a pair of lips was pressed to his briefly. They emerged together. 

Fernando looked up to Kimi’s now vacant bag as Mark entwined their fingers under water. A small part of his mind was still annoyed at Mark as he really didn’t think Kimi had that much time left in him. But this close proximity to the Australian washed that away. He looked down, hiding his smile.

“Great. We done now?” Lewis asked in a bored tone as the three remaining drivers headed out of the lake. He stood up and brushed himself down as Kimi followed by Fernando then Mark climbed out of the lake using the ladders provided. Fernando was massaging his arms. 

“If that is what these bush tucker trials are like then I cannot see how any of you loose,” Fernando commented. Mark, Kimi and Lewis looked at each other before turning to Fernando and unanimously telling him he was wrong. 

“It’s a lot harder than that mate,” Mark said.

“Covering in bugs and shit,” Lewis added. 

“That was easy. Trial not so much.” Kimi finished. Fernando blushed slightly at his apparent stupidity.

“Congratulations then, red team,” Mark said. Kimi and Fernando nodded. “Suppose that’s it then…” Mark said, his eyes falling on Fernando. The sadness was too clear in his eyes. He didn’t want to leave him again. 

“Yes. We go now.” Kimi said, and with a small wave he disappeared through the bushes, back the way they had initially come. Fernando looked over at Mark. He wanted to hug him again, hold him, but now without the cover of Kimi and Lewis there was no chance. He sighed, looking at Mark. 

“See you…” Fernando said without moving. 

“Bye.” Lewis said, turning and moving away. He had taken about five steps when he noticed Mark wasn’t with him. He looked back to see Fernando and Mark standing apart awkwardly, just looking at each other. “Mark?”

“Yeah. See you later,” Mark said, blushing as he turned away from Fernando and followed Lewis, leaving the Spaniard standing alone. Fernando sighed. 

“Was fine.” Kimi said to the interviewer as Fernando jogged to catch him up. She looked more than relieved when Fernando stood at Kimi’s side. 

“Yeah. It was not the easiest of trials. Was fine at the beginning; then your arms start to ache. You try and keep holding on and ignoring the pain but then you begin to slip and you try to pull yourself up but then the pain becomes clear. Good to win the meals tonight though.” Fernando said, and with a small nod Kimi and he left to go back to camp. 

“I just couldn’t get a good grip.” Lewis started, feeling that Mark’s attention was elsewhere. “I could feel myself slipping at the beginning so I tried to get a better hold, but that was counter productive. Before I knew it I was falling into the lake. The very cold lake I might add.” Lewis finished, turning to look at Mark who was looking off in the direction Fernando and Kimi had gone. Mark turned back to face Lewis, frowning slightly, when he realised both he and the interviewer were looking at him expectantly. 

“Huh? Oh… Yeah the trial was hard. It really starts to get to you when your arms start aching. Once Lewis had dropped I kind of guessed we weren’t going to win. But I didn’t give up. It was always going to be hard going up against Fernando and Kimi but we gave it our best,” Mark smiled and the interviewer released them back to camp. Mark strode ahead and Lewis had to catch up to him.

“Hey man, are you all right?” Lewis asked looking concerned at his team member as they headed back to camp. Mark smiled falsely. 

“Fine.”

“If you want to lie, Mark, you’re going to need some more lessons from Fernando and Kimi about hiding emotions,” Lewis joked. Mark didn’t find it funny and shot him a dark look. The rest of the walk back to camp was silent. 

“How was it?” Jenson called, dishing out Fernando and Kimi’s lunch as they returned to camp. Seb stood to see them arrive, both looking placid. 

“We won the meals for tonight,” Fernando smiled, welcoming the cheer that followed. Kimi was heading to his bed when Seb caught him in a hug. 

“I knew you would win! I just knew it!” Seb smiled excitedly as Kimi put his arms around the young German, smiling at his happiness. 

“Technically, I win the meals for tonight.” Kimi said as he let go of Seb and turned to Fernando. Fernando just rolled his eyes. It was only at this point Seb realised Kimi’s shirt was damp. 

“Only because Mark pulled me off. I would have been fine for another fifteen minutes.” Fernando said, falling heavily into a seat around the fire. Saying good-bye to Mark and knowing he was so close was harder than saying good-bye at the helicopters. The subtle touches Mark and he had shared at the trial he craved for. But he couldn’t have them. It darkened his mood. 

“Mark?” Jenson asked, taking a seat next to Fernando. The Spaniard just nodded. Jenson put an arm around his shoulder and muttered lowly to him. “You alright?” Fernando nodded and put on a smile. When Seb and Kimi made there way over to the campfire Kimi had his sunglasses on again. 

“So what did you have to do?” Nico asked, hanging the mirror back on its branch after checking his hair. Kimi and Fernando – but mainly Fernando – explained the trial. Questions were asked and details were given. By the way Fernando was talking, everyone picked up on the vibe to not cross into the conversation about their challengers – who by process of elimination, they had worked out were Lewis and Mark. Once Kimi and Fernando had eaten their lunch every body split off to doing their own thing. Seb tried in vain to get something else out of Kimi about the trial, Jenson and a protesting Nico went off to clean out the dunny and Fernando, being watched by Kimi, moved back over to his bed and held his white shirt close with his back to the camp. Fernando wished he hadn’t seen Mark. He wished he had remained ignorant to how close he was, how much he really did miss him. Because even though they had spent more than three days apart before, he had always been able to contact the Australian to find out how he was or what he was doing. And now he couldn’t. And that made it harder. He didn’t want to be around people. He just wanted to pretend Mark was here. Pretend that Mark was wearing the white shirt he had crumpled in his hand and pressed to his face. Pretend Mark was holding him close. Reliving their secret kiss. 

Kimi had watched Fernando cross the camp. He had noticed the way he acted around Mark in the trial, but he hadn’t given it much thought then. He put it down because they were close and they hadn’t seen each other in a while. He didn’t realise they were that close. He turned his eyes from Fernando’s back with an odd feeling. Was he jealous? Not of Mark and him. Definitely not. But of what they had? Maybe. Kimi had never felt jealous before. Not to his recollection. He never cared enough about anyone else to get jealous. But here he was, wishing he could sulk off like Fernando because he was missing someone so much it physically hurt? His eyes fell on Seb and he pushed his sunglasses up.

“What?” Seb asked; blushing instantly under the intense look Kimi was giving him. Kimi just shrugged and turned to look at the fire, placing his sunglasses back over his eyes. Weird.

“We didn’t win,” Mark announced as they entered the camp. The sigh of disappointment was almost audible in the silence of camp. Mark still couldn’t get over how quiet it could be with everyone around. He didn’t like it in its eerie, quiet state.

“We were against Kimi and Fernando. Mark did really well, but I just couldn’t find a good position,” Lewis sighed as he sat down by the fire and accepted his lunch from Romain. He looked down at the rice and beans. The very same thing he would be eating for dinner. He almost didn’t have the heart to eat it but he was too hungry to refuse. 

“Were we right? Were you playing for meals?” Sergio called from his bed. He was sitting on it playing cards with Felipe using the leaves Mark and he had fashioned. Mark nodded, still standing, taking his lunch from Romain. 

“Great. Because rice and beans are my favourite…” Felipe muttered sarcastically, looking down at the leaves in his hand. 

“What did you have to do?” Romain asked, preventing anyone who had heard Felipe’s comment from adding to it. 

“Hang from a bag above a lake for the longest. They all lasted ages.” Lewis said between mouthfuls of beans, indicating to Mark with his thumb. Mark was looking up through the trees, trying to work out how far away they were from the other camp. “In the end Mark had to pull Fernando off his bag or we would have probably been there all night,” Lewis said, eyes only for his food. Romain was watching Mark with a curious expression. 

“What do you mean pull him off? Is that against the rules?” Sergio asked, abandoning his game with Felipe momentarily. 

“No. The red team had won and then it turned into a contest between Kimi and Fernando. Fernando looked like he was struggling, but then Kimi could have been too. You can never tell anything with Kimi. Fernando’s leg swung off the bag… Right, Mark?” The Australian was pulled back into the camp at the mention of his name. 

“Huh?” He asked stupidly. 

“Fernando’s leg. Did it fall off the bag or did you pull it off?” Lewis asked, still not looking up and eating ravenously. Romain was still watching Mark who hadn’t even begun his lunch. 

“He was trying to pull himself up the bag and it swung down.” Mark said, finally taking a seat. He looked down at his food and just shovelled it around his tray. Lewis picked up his rendition. 

“Right. So Fernando’s leg swung down and Mark caught his ankle and pulled him off. They Kimi let go and we came back. I swear Kimi was struggling though. No one can hold onto a bag for forty-five minutes and be absolutely fine about it. I’m surprised Fernando wasn’t more pissed at you, Mark.” Lewis mused, scraping up the last of his rice. Mark shrugged, not looking up.

“Maybe he was grateful he could stop but now he can blame me if Kimi claims he won.” Mark lied. He tried his hardest not to think about their secret kiss under the water but it had been too perfect, too long since it had happened. Mark sighed and forced the first spoonful of food into his mouth. Romain concluded that Mark must just be really disappointed that they lost. That was the only logical explanation he could come up with for Mark’s downbeat attitude. 

\- - -

Jenson went to get it. Jenson was the first to read it. Jenson was smiling when he entered camp holding it. Maybe the best news. Or maybe not… Food was always excellent new. Everyone frowned at him and his cheery attitude when he entered camp. Fernando was still lying on his bed with his back to them all. Jenson cleared his throat as he lifted the laminate to read it out loud. 

“Drivers. Tomorrow morning you will have the members of Snake Rock joining you for the remainder of their time in the jungle. You will-”

“-WHAT?” Fernando sat up so fast and rolled over that he fell onto the floor. But it didn’t matter. It didn’t matter everyone was watching him. He got up and, as quickly as he could, ran over to Jenson. He stood behind him and read the words off the laminate, over the Brit’s shoulder, that he couldn’t believe he had heard. But there they were in black ink. Printed and handed to them. Tomorrow morning you will have the members of Snake Rock joining you for the remainder of their time in the jungle. Tomorrow morning. That was how long he had to wait for Mark. And he didn’t really care about the rest of the message. That on its own was perfect enough. 

“Can I carry on now?” Jenson smiled over his shoulder at Fernando. Fernando blushed and nodded, taking a seat next to Nico. Jenson was so happy it was him who was allowed to give Fernando the news he had been waiting for. Once Fernando was sat down Jenson carried on. 

“You will have five extra members joining you, which means you will need five extra beds. You have been given five hammocks to hang before your fellow camp mates get here and it is your decision on who gets the hammocks and who gets the beds.” Jenson lifted a bundle of green material as he spoke, namely the hammocks. 

“We have to decide?” Seb asked and Jenson nodded. 

“Make them all sleep on the hammocks?” Nico suggested, protectively sitting on his own bed. 

“How is that fair? If this is the nicer camp they have probably been sleeping on the floor,” Fernando put in.

“Give up your bed then,” Nico countered. 

“I happily will.” Fernando said, folding his arms. Nico fell silent, shocked by Fernando’s statement. 

“Ok… So, Fernando is happy in a hammock?” Jenson asked, extracting one of the green hammocks from the pile and throwing it over to the nodding Spaniard. 

“Mark can have my bed.” He stated before anyone could give it to someone else. Jenson gave him and knowing look but Fernando matched it with a defiant one. 

“Right… Who else is-?”

“-Kimi really needs a bed because of his back,” Seb cut in. The Finn just shrugged. “But I’ll take a hammock. Fernando has a point.”

“Should we leave Sergio, Felipe, Romain and Lewis to fight over the remaining two beds?” Jenson asked, passing Seb a hammock.

“Two?” Nico asked. 

“Seb’s and Mine. The hammocks look fun,” Jenson shrugged. 

“Wait until you try and get in it,” Nico muttered, sliding back and tucking his legs up on his bed. 

“Ok, so Fernando, Seb and myself will be in the hammocks. Kimi, Nico and Mark have the beds. Two more beds, two more hammocks. Who goes where?” Jenson asked. Everyone looked around, not wanting to make that decision. 

“Make them decide.” Nico said, lying back on his bed. His bed that he wasn’t going to give up. 

“Get them to do paper, scissors, rock when they get here?” Seb suggested. 

“Or we could do it on their behalf?” Fernando said, attaching his hammock to the set branches next to his old bed. Everyone looked over to him until he finished and turned to face them, started slightly to have all of their attention. He sat back on his hammock and started swinging slightly in it. “Well, we have each of their teammates from Formula One in here. I could go on Felipe’s behalf, Kimi on Romain’s, Jenson on Sergio’s and Nico on Lewis’.”

“That sounds good,” Jenson nodded. Fernando contemplated his idea. 

“Although…” Fernando started. Everyone looked at him again. “Felipe will probably bitch if he doesn’t get a bed… Especially if he has been sleeping on the floor.”

“Lewis will bitch if Felipe gets something he doesn’t,” Jenson commented. Nico nodded. 

“So the decision is made anyway?” Seb pointed out. Fernando shrugged, picking up the pace of his swings. “If Felipe will moan he has no bed and Lewis will moan if Felipe gets a bed and not him then surely we have decided Felipe and Lewis will get the last two beds?”

“I suppose we have.” Nico yawned, tucking his hands behind his head. 

“Do you think Romain and Sergio will mind?” Fernando said. 

“Romain will be happy as long as he’s not on the floor.” Kimi said. 

“And I’m sure Sergio will not want any arguments if how Felipe was talking yesterday was anything to go by,” Jenson added. Happy with their decision, they each helped – bar Nico – to set up the remaining hammocks and were all seated back around the fire just in time for the food bag to drop into camp. 

“They’re picking where we sleep?” Lewis asked as Mark finished reading the laminate. Mark nodded. “Where do you think they will put us?”

“I will have a bed, for sure. I reckon they will be fair,” Felipe said, giving his floor-bed a disgusted look. 

“Yeah, but Nico’s in there. And Kimi. I don’t reckon we will all get a bed.” Romain commented, folding his clothes. Mark fiddled with the corners of the laminate in his hand. He had a sneaky suspicion that he would get a bed. Especially if Fernando had anything to say about it. But he didn’t need a bed. He felt bad that because of what he had with Fernando he was probably going to get a bed. 

“Mark will get a bed.” Sergio commented as he started the rice for their dinner. Again. Mark looked over to him, bemused. 

“How could you know that?” Mark asked and Sergio blushed. 

“Its just… Well… Everyone likes you. They will give you a bed.”

“People like you as well,” Mark reassured. Sergio smiled slightly, pouring the rice into the pan. 

“Not as much as you. I bet you get a bed.” Mark didn’t want to push the point; he could only agree with Sergio. He fell silent, watching the fire. 

“Who do you reckon will have given up their bed?” Lewis asked, as if whoever had was out of their mind. He certainly wouldn’t have. 

“Fernando.” Mark said without thinking about it. Everyone looked over at him. He swallowed. “Maybe?”

“Sounded pretty certain about that,” Romain commented, giving Mark a sceptical look. Mark kept his eyes on the fire. 

“He seems like the kind of guy who would. I bet Jenson would have as well,” Mark added, bringing the attention off Fernando. Everyone else carried on the conversation, but Romain just watched Mark. They ate their beans and rice, somehow, and bid each other goodnight, settling down for there last night in Snake Rock. Mark felt no need to break tradition and settled himself sitting, leaning his back against one of the logs, in front of the fire. Just one night to get through and he would see Fernando again. Romain, who was still watching him from across the camp, did not miss the smile that fell onto his face. Mark’s face was illuminated and defined by the flickering flame. Something was there with Mark, even if Romain couldn’t put his finger on it yet. Something was there. 

Croc Creak had finished another great meal and climbed into bed with fuller stomachs than they had had over the past few days. Fernando had gone down to the creak to wash up alone, Jenson found out after asking Kimi. He headed down to the Spaniard to hear him singing. He was humming some soft tune, occasionally adding some lyrics out loud in Spanish. Jenson didn’t have the heart to interrupt him. He turned around and headed back into camp.

“You can come down instead of loitering in the trees,” Fernando commented before picking up his humming again. Jenson turned around and joined the Spaniard, sitting on a rock and watching him wash up. 

“I came down to help,” Jenson said, watching Fernando’s hands. 

“This is a lie.” Fernando added casually, placing the third clean tin on top of the other clean ones and starting on the next. 

“Isn’t.” Jenson muttered. 

“If not then you can dry,” Fernando smiled, throwing the tea towel at Jenson. It hit him in the face and the Spaniard laughed. 

“Thanks,” Jenson muttered, whipping Fernando’s arm with the towel. He picked up the first tray Fernando had washed and began drying it. He pondered his words before he spoke again. “So…”

“There is it,” Fernando smiled, placing the next tray on the pile. Jenson rolled his eyes. 

“You don’t know what I’m going to ask.” Jenson said. Fernando looked over at him with his hands on his hips. 

“Yes. About Mark.”

“No.” Jenson lied. Fernando rolled his eyes and set back to washing the last tray. 

“Just ask me,”

“What… What are you two?”

“Friends.” Fernando said. 

“… With benefits?”

“Jenson!”

“Oh come on, there is so obviously much more there than just friends,” Jenson scoffed. Fernando blushed. 

“Just friends… Sorry to disappoint.” There was a pause. 

“You’re lying.”

“Am not.”

“We’ll see.” Jenson smiled, picking up the second tray. Fernando put down the last and frowned at him. 

“What do you mean by this?”

“Mark comes in tomorrow morning. We’ll see who is right.” Fernando blushed and fiddled uncomfortably with the edge of his shirt. He waited until Jenson was finished and they walked back into camp together. Jenson stopped him just outside. “Just… Be careful of Kimi,” Fernando frowned. 

“Why? What does Kimi-?”

“He picks up on a lot more than he lets on. Trust me. I know from experience.” Jenson tried to push Kimi’s revelation in the middle of last year from his mind.

“In what sense?” Fernando asked, intrigued. Jenson shook his head. 

“It’s not important. Just be careful; he’s your teammate next year, he will find out things about you that you won’t believe is possible… Things you don’t even know yourself.” Fernando put a hand on Jenson’s shoulder. 

“Ok. I be careful,” Fernando said and Jenson nodded. Everyone was in their beds when they got back, Seb cocooned in his hammock. Jenson turned to Fernando. 

“Do we test out the hammocks or have one last night of a solid bed?” Jenson joked. 

“Am taking the bed; at least a few nights to get used to the hammock,” Fernando smiled, shaking Jenson’s hand and retiring to his bed. Jenson watched him go, crawling into his sleeping bag and wrapping himself close to that white shirt. Just one more night, Fernando. One more night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Firstly, I must apologise for my error in the last part. Felipe's wife is Rafaella not Ana and this has been changed in the last part. Apologies. 
> 
> The next trial is Submerged and only ONE driver will take part. As the camps have now merged this can be any one driver from the jungle. The voting will close at 9:00pm UK time on the 12th December.
> 
> The relationships that are/will be active in this fic are:  
> Seb/Kimi  
> Fernando/Mark  
> Jenson/Lewis  
> Jenson/Nico 
> 
> They will appear even if they have not yet and I will add them to the tags as they become apparent. Please keep voting for relationships you want, if you want any others. It is no longer necessary to vote for the relationships above; they WILL feature in this fic. 
> 
> THE TWO NEW DRIVER VOTING HAS BEEN EXTENDED. You have until the 12th December to vote for the two new drivers you wish to see enter the jungle. It is very close between the top three so please keep voting for who you want even if you have already voted. 
> 
> VOTING FORMATS:  
> Submerged - Alonso  
> CLOSES 12TH DEC  
> New Drivers - Di Resta/Maldonado  
> CLOSES 12TH DEC  
> Relationships -  Romain/Sergio  
> CONTINUOUS AT THE MOMENT
> 
> As long as your voting is clear do not worry about it being exactly to my formats. Relationships will close when the drivers begin to get voted out. I will tell you closer to the time when that is going to happen. 
> 
> Thank you for reading and voting. I hope you are enjoying this fic.


	6. Day Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone comes together and sparks begin to fly.

Seb and Kimi were sitting on Seb’s bed as Fernando built up the fire. Jenson and Nico were still asleep and the three drivers were discussing past Formula One drivers. It was mainly Kimi and Seb; Fernando was just smirking to himself.

“You’re honestly telling me you think Mika is better than Michael?” Seb asked Kimi, looking at in as if he were mental. 

“He beat him.” Kimi said.

“So did Fernando but you don’t think he’s better than Michael.” Seb countered. 

“Hey!” Fernando outburst in jest but he was ignored by both of them. 

“1998.” Kimi said to Seb, as if no other explanation was necessary. Seb’s eyes narrowed slightly.

“2000.” He countered. 

“1999.”

“That’s not fair; if Michael hadn’t have broken his leg during Silverstone he would have gone on to win that championship.” Seb pouted, folding his arms. Kimi smirked at him as he sipped from his tea – or, if you could call it tea.

“Sure.” Kimi muttered. He caught Fernando’s eye and they shared a smirk as Seb huffed.

“1994, 1995, 2000, 2001-” Seb started, counting off Michael’s World Champion years on his fingers. Kimi rolled his eyes.

“-‘95 Mika did not partake in every race.” Kimi commented.

“Doesn’t matter, he retired from eleven of the fifteen races he started. That’s where Michael is superior.”

“Or it’s just down to a good car.” Kimi countered teasingly. Seb was so easy to wind up. 

“2002, 2003, 2004!” Seb insisted. Kimi laughed under his breath at Seb’s determination. He placed a hand on the young German’s shoulder, but as he opened his mouth to speak a Spanish voice was heard. 

“And then 2005 comes and no other than the great Fernando Alonso breaks that wonderful streak of his,” Fernando smiled smugly, leaning on the pole holding a lamp at the end of Seb’s bed. Both Kimi and Seb look at him: Kimi with an uninterested expression and Seb was just glaring at him. 

“All good runs have to come to an end.” Seb commented in a forced even tone.

“This is true.” Fernando nodded, giving Seb a knowing look. 

“Just coincidence you were there when it ended.” Seb shot in a satisfactory voice. It was easier for him to put it down to coincidence rather than skill for Fernando because that was the one thing that made it difficult to like him sometimes; it had been him that had broken Michael’s record-breaking run. Maybe that was why he got so much satisfaction out of beating him year in year out. 

“Not coincidence because I broke two things that day.” Fernando teased. 

“Which were?” Seb asked, taking the bait too easily.

“Michael’s imperishable run and the record for the youngest World Champion which was held by him until 2005.”

“Until I broke it.” Seb countered. 

“Actually, Lewis broke this record in 2008, so you broke his record, not mine.” Fernando smiled. Sebastian rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah, but Michael has won five times in a prestigious Ferrari. That’s something you haven’t done.” Seb mocked. Fernando just smiled at him. 

“Yet.” Fernando teased. Seb blinked at him stupidly. 

“Yet?”

“Like you say: ‘all good runs have to come to an end’.” Fernando smiled as he returned to the fire. Seb looked over to Kimi but the Finn had lay down on Seb’s bed looking up towards the sky. Seb wanted to lie down next to him, but he thought other people might think that was weird. He made to get up but Kimi wrapped his hand around his wrist. He looked down into Kimi’s eyes as he sat back down. Kimi kept pulling on his wrist until Seb was lying next to him. Seb felt his breathing increase but fought to try and keep it even. He didn’t want Kimi to know how much he loved being in this close proximity to him. Kimi turned back to the sky. 

“Not everyone has the same beliefs as you.” Kimi commented and Seb frowned, his mind being wiped blank at Kimi’s invitation to lay with him. When Seb didn’t answer Kimi looked over at him. “About Michael.” Seb nodded and Kimi continued. “Yes, he was a fantastic driver and he did break loads of records but I was brought up looking up to Mika, lucky enough to get to race with him and even take his seat and his guidance into my own racing. Maybe this is the same for you with Michael.”

“I suppose.” Seb said. He’d never really thought about other countries having their own Formula One stars to celebrate. To him, Michael’s achievements were on such a grand scale it didn’t seem that anyone else could take his pedestal. And Seb felt that he himself was heading the same way. 

“All good things come to an end. Someone will come through the sport and break Michael’s records – probably you – and someone will come along after you and break all of your records. That’s how it works. We do what we can to hold ourselves in history so that when we fade away there is still a trace of us having made our mark.” Seb was clinging to Kimi’s every word. And that was slightly more difficult than usual because for some reason the Finn had a lot to say. Fernando dropped an empty pan by the fire and it clattered on the wood. Seb’s eyes fell briefly on the Spaniard before he turned back to Kimi, rolling on his side and showing his back to Fernando. 

“But he’s not ‘coming along’.” Seb started, indicating Fernando. “He’s here already. And he thinks he can win again.” His voice was a little desperately. Kimi saw he wanted to be given confirmation Fernando couldn’t do it again but that was something Kimi couldn’t offer. He gave Seb his opinion. 

“I will be surprised if he doesn’t.” Kimi said, watching Seb closely. Seb pouted and looked down at his hands. Kimi rolled onto his side and placed a hand on Seb’s cheek. “Is his mentality, his determination. He has desperation to get a third title. It is these attributes that make me think he will.”

“But I-”

“-I know you have the same mentality, Seb, but he has more fight in him because it has escape him for the last four years... No longer, last eight years.” Kimi said, trying to convey to Seb what he meant. Maybe he wasn’t being clear enough; he had never been good with words. “He is in the mind set to do whatever it takes to get the title.” Seb’s eyes shot to Kimi, a small sense of anger residing there. 

“I will not have him at Red Bull.” Seb said bluntly, clearly showing he thought that was the only way Fernando could win a third title. Kimi gave a breathy laugh as he brushed a finger against Seb’s cheek. 

“I don’t think that’s his plan. And I’m not sure that is your choice.” Kimi sighed, subconsciously moving slightly closer to Seb. Seb tried to ignore the buzz in his stomach as Kimi’s knee touched his. Seb fiddled with his fingers and looked at them as he spoke quietly. 

“I wanted you at Red Bull.” Seb muttered. Kimi wanted to pull Seb into him and rock him in a soothing manner. He felt like Seb was too young to be able to deal with everything that was being thrust upon him. He wanted to protect him. He tilted Seb’s chin up and forced him to look at him. Seb didn’t resist. 

“You didn’t.” Kimi muttered, looking deep into Seb’s eyes. 

“Yes I did.” Seb insisted. 

“I am a horrible teammate.”

“I don’t care.”

“I do not move for people and I tend to ignore team orders.”

“You sound perfect.” Seb said before he could stop himself. The double meaning that Seb knew was behind his words made him blush, feeling the blood run quickly to his face. Kimi brushed a finger across the red streak on Seb’s cheek, making it more predominant. Seb’s breath became slightly ragged as Kimi’s fingers ran over his skin, leaving a prickly sensation in their wake. Kimi stopped moving his fingers and held Seb’s gaze, trying desperately to be able to read something in them that meant they both wanted the same thing. Kimi didn’t want to make a fool of himself but Seb’s words needed an answer. His eyes fixed on the slightly parted lips of the German and then flipped back to his eyes, taking the plunge. Seb held his breath as Kimi leaned closer to him, his brain trying to find some logical explanation. Kimi’s eyes slid closed and Seb understood, matching the Finn’s motion and pushing himself into the darkness of unknown, waiting…

“Hello!” Lewis’ sing-song voice floated down from the entrance to camp and Kimi dropped his head. His forehead rested on Seb’s and he hated himself for appearing to be a tease. That wasn’t what he wanted to happen. But he knew this couldn’t happen now. Not with more people coming into camp and the prospect of everyone seeing. He quickly placed a soft kiss on Seb’s forehead, hoping the German understood the promise it represented, and climbed off the bed. He moved straight over to Nico’s bed and shook him until he woke up, complaining. 

Seb opened his eyes slowly as he registered that Kimi was no longer with him. He tried to stop the sadness filling him but it was flooding in fast. He made himself focus on the soft pressure he had felt on his forehead. Maybe he had read Kimi wrong. That wouldn’t surprise him. Maybe what Kimi was offering as comforting friendship Seb had interpreted as a push for something more. He felt stupid and young. His naivety crushing him as he forced himself not to show his weakness and curl into a little ball. How could Kimi ever want someone like him? He was just a spoilt little brat who thought everyone should believe him, no? Isn’t that how he had portrayed himself this morning? Hadn’t he effectively stamped his feet and thrown a tantrum at Fernando’s comments of winning another title, taking his position at Red Bull? His self-loathing grew as he tried to keep himself in check, gaining some face that meant he could join the rest of the camp. But not anywhere near Kimi. Now he was determined to put as much distance between him and the Finn, however hard that challenge appeared to be. 

With Nico grumbling something about Kimi being the worst wake up call ever, the Finn moved over to Jenson – who was a lot easier to wake up. Seb, Jenson and Kimi joined Fernando by the fire as Nico hid in his sleeping bag, claiming he wasn’t camera ready. Jenson noted the way Fernando had froze, holding the serving spoon in his hand tightly. Jenson gave his shoulder a squeeze with pulled Fernando from his trace. He gave the Brit a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. 

“You sure we came the right way?” They heard Lewis call back to his camp through the trees. Jenson smirked. 

“For sure, Lewis. This is the way the camera people said to go.” Felipe’s tired and annoyed voice called back. Fernando rolled his eyes as he set about putting beans and rice into the pan for breakfast. 

“Do you reckon they have eaten?” Fernando asked as Jenson sat down. Kimi moved over to Seb to sit next to him but Seb crossed back to opposite him and sat next to Jenson. Kimi was too used to hiding how he really felt, but this blatant move away seemed to cut through his normal closed emotions. He blinked, just staring at Seb who refused to look up at him. 

“Don’t know.” Jenson said, leaning forwards on his knees as he watched the entrance of camp for signs of the first figure. “Just give it a sec before you start, they’ll be here in a moment so we’ll ask them.” Fernando nodded and sat back on his knees, his back to the entrance of camp. Jenson mused that maybe Fernando had been setting out on breakfast to give him a distraction and not stare like Jenson was. He looked over at the Spaniard and noted that he was staring at the fire intently. Jenson smiled. Just friends his arse. 

“Britney! Are you going to get your arse out of bed or do I have to drag it?” Jenson called, turning to face Nico. Nico stuck his tongue out at him. 

“If you would pass me my jacket and my bag I would be happy to oblige.” Nico said, pointing at his stuff at the end of his bed. Jenson looked down at his own white shirt and pyjama shorts. 

“You can play dress up later, come here.”

“Then I’ll stay here, thank you.” Nico said, snuggling down further in his sleeping bag. Jenson went to speak again, but a call from the other camp made him turn and smile. 

“Yeah, this is the right way; Jenson’s having and argument with Nico about getting up.” Lewis called, a smiled obviously clear in his voice. Nico noted the way Jenson reacted to Lewis’ voice. He didn’t like that. He wanted Jenson’s attention not to have to fight for it. He pouted as he brought the material closer around him. 

“That’s great, do you think you could walk a little faster now?” Mark’s irritated voice called. Fernando’s eyes widened and he felt giddy. He didn’t know how he was supposed to be reacting. He wished Jenson had let him start on breakfast. 

“It’s not my fault this map is unreadable.” Lewis shot back. A tinge of hatred Fernando hadn’t felt since 2007 shot through his body at Lewis’ voice. He convinced himself it was uncalled for, but the fact it was Lewis’ shoddy map reading skills that was taking so long for them to get here made his muscles tense. 

“Give it to Romain if you can’t read it,” Mark seethed. 

“It’s alright now, we’re nearly there.” Lewis countered. There was a small silence where everyone was waiting. 

“Oh! I see smoke!” Sergio called through the woods. Fernando closed his eyes and forced himself to take deep breaths. His nervousness was confusing him but there was nothing he could do about it now. Jenson grinned at Seb but the German was staring at Kimi who was also looking towards the entrance of camp. It happened so fast. One moment there was five of them and the next there were ten. 

Sergio led them into camp, followed by Lewis, Romain and Felipe with Mark bringing up the rear. They were all impressed by the size of this camp compared to the one they had just left. Calls of hello were shouted and everyone came together to exchange greeting and to welcome or be welcomed into camp. Romain crossed to Kimi and shook his hand and Sergio did the same to Jenson before heading over to Nico to ruffle his air. Lewis hugged Jenson with a laugh and a joke to the displeasure of Nico. Mark headed straight for Fernando. Fernando had stood but he still hadn’t turned around. Mark touched his shoulder lightly and was glad he was standing so close to the Spaniard as he threw himself into his arms. Mark smiled into his hair and pulled him close, trying to absorb as much of him as he could. Making sure everyone was behind him, Mark pressed his lips softly to Fernando’s temple, loving the way he melted into him more in response. Kimi watched them as Romain moved over to Jenson and his eyes slid to Seb who was talking to Felipe. It was worse now he knew that he was jealous of Fernando and Mark. It made him want to stride across camp and pulled Seb to him without a care of who was watching. He folded his arms instead, pushing his sunglasses on his face as Fernando and Mark fell apart. Mark pushed a strand of hair behind Fernando’s ear, still standing in front of him.

“Did you sleep at all last night?” Mark asked, forcing his hands away from Fernando and taking in the shadows of rings around his eyes. Fernando looked down at his shoes. 

“A little. Not much.” Mark sighed. 

“You have to sleep, Fernando.”

“I will. I do. I just… Could not last night.” Fernando muttered to the floor. Mark tilted his head back up with a delicate finger under his chin but Jenson clamped his hand on Mark’s shoulder. Mark turned from Fernando as Jenson pulled him into a hug. Fernando folded his arms and rolled his eyes at the knowing smile Jenson gave him over Mark’s shoulder. They broke out of their hug and Fernando stood behind Mark, just off his shoulder. Mark linked their hands easily. 

“So, how was camp yellow?” Jenson asked Mark, smirking at Mark’s exasperated expression. 

“Complex.” Mark said, making the Brit smile. He dropped his voice as he added. “I’m sure you’ll find out soon enough.” 

“Is this Felipe and Lewis?” Fernando asked and Mark nodded. 

“I think they each have a death wish for the other.”

“That’s a bit extreme,” Jenson commented, looking over to where Lewis was trying to get Nico out of bed.

“You wait until they start on each other.” Mark commented as Felipe headed over to them. Fernando moved from Mark’s hold to speak with Felipe, and after the Brazilian had shook Jenson’s hand, Jenson rounded on Mark pulling him away from Fernando. Fernando kept his eyes on them as Felipe spoke to him. 

“So…” Jenson said, the same air about him as he had had talking to Fernando last night. Mark just frowned at him a little. “Fernando and you.” Mark’s face blushed a little as he quickly deviated the subject. 

“What’s going on with the beds then?” Mark asked. Jenson just smiled. 

“Because I’m a little confused. He said-”

“-Beds.” Mark blurted out, catching the others attention. It was desperate but he wasn’t having this conversation with Jenson. Ever.

“That’s a good point,” Lewis said, abandoning Nico. Jenson shot Mark a look telling him this wasn’t over and the Australian swallowed nervously, moving back towards Fernando. Lewis casually draped an arm around Jenson’s shoulders. “So where have you put me?” Jenson dished out the beds whilst Fernando returned back to getting the fire ready for breakfast. Felipe was pretty pleased by his bed just above the one Kimi was staying on – Kimi had taken Seb’s bed because he refused to let anyone else get the bed closest to the fire – and accepted it gratefully. He was grinning fondly until he watched Lewis sit on Jenson’s old bed. At that point he scowled and folded his arms. At least mine is closer to the fire. He thought, finding some solace in that fact. No one was surprised when Nico didn’t move and no one was surprised when Mark got the last bed. Everyone settled around the fire and Nico thought they were all distracted enough from him. As he climbed out of bed, jacket pulled close to his face with the hood up and his brilliant hot-pink pyjama shorts on, Mark started the wolf whistling. Nico glared at them all as he stalked off towards the creak, swinging his bag onto his back. They all began laughing and Mark’s eyes fell on Fernando’s little smirk as he tended the fire. God, he loved that little smirk. 

“Have you guys had breakfast yet?” Seb asked from his position between Felipe and Romain by the fire. Kimi was sitting opposite him again but Seb was deliberately not looking at his sunglass-covered face. Mark was sat next to Kimi with his arms stretched out behind him, resting on Kimi’s bed, and Sergio on his other side, the gap between the Australian and the Mexican showing the place Fernando had vacated to get to the fire. The Finn had his arms folded.

“Nah, mate.” Mark sighed, relaxing back in his seat. 

“Some people thought it would be useful to use all of the rice and beans last night.” Felipe shot across the fire at Lewis. Lewis glared back at him. 

“We were all really hungry!” Lewis justified. 

“And whose fault was that?” Felipe retaliated. 

“Is fine. We have enough for everyone.” Fernando said, shooting a look at Felipe. Felipe glared over at Lewis but fell silent. The air fell awkwardly on everyone’s shoulders. Romain and Sergio, who were sitting next to each other just before the corner of the benches, exchanged a look. Jenson cleared his throat.

“I’ll get the beans,” he said as Fernando put five more scoops of rice into the pan. Mark settled back to watching Fernando as gradually mini conversations restarted in camp. Kimi was watching Seb who was having an in depth conversation with Romain and Felipe about football. He wanted Seb to at least acknowledge Kimi was watching him, at least show some sign towards an explanation of why he was suddenly being shut out. He watched Seb’s eyes flick towards him for a moment and then do it again a few minutes later followed by a gentle blush rising on his cheeks. Kimi sighed contently. At least he knew Seb knew he was still here. 

Jenson helped Fernando with the beans and Nico returned to camp, dressed and looking like he was ready to go on a fashion shoot. He sat himself on the edge of one of the benches, next to Lewis, and dropped his bag with a small thud. Lewis looked at it suspiciously. 

“What the hell is in there?” Lewis asked, reaching to take Nico’s bag. Nico casually moved it to the end of the bench and out of Lewis’ reach. 

“My stuff.” There was a pause where Lewis blinked at Nico.

“It thudded.”

“No it didn’t.” Nico said, a voice full of confidence. Fernando and Jenson exchanged a look of confusion across the fire. The look changed to be knowing; they could both feel the inevitability.

“It did.”

“I think you need you ears testing.”

“I think you need to tell me what’s in that bag that goes ‘thud’” Lewis countered. Fernando dished up three trays and handed them to Jenson. 

“It’s none of your business what’s in my bag.” Nico said.

“Why don’t you leave it by your bed then?” Lewis asked sceptically. Nico folded his arms. 

“God knows what could crawl in it if I leave it over there.”

“All of us-”

“-How about you stop talking and eat instead.” Jenson said, pushing himself between the two of them and handing them a tray of breakfast. Nico took his happily, thanking Jenson, but Lewis just shot Nico a look. He would find out what went thud in Nico’s bag. 

Mark stood up to help Fernando finish dishing up breakfast and handed them all a plate. Seb took a fleeting look at Kimi but as their eyes met Seb blushed brightly and looked down at his food. Mark led Fernando back to their original position on the bench and sat down. As he went to lift the first forkful of his breakfast to his mouth his eyes fell on a red-faced Seb. He frowned. 

“You alright, Seb?” Mark called to him, making everyone turn in his direction. This, obviously, made Seb blush a deeper red. 

“I’m fine.” Seb said, keeping his eyes on his food.

“You’ve gone very red.” Sergio commented between mouthfuls. Fernando and Jenson glanced at each other before looking away quickly, forcing the smiles off their faces. It hadn’t slipped their attention how Kimi had been watching Seb all morning and Fernando definitely not missed how close and quiet they had become after he left the conversation earlier. 

“I’m fine.” Seb muttered again. 

“He must be hot.” Kimi said bluntly, finally taking his eyes off of Seb. Seb looked up at him, panic in his eyes at what Kimi would say next. He didn’t know how open Kimi would be about what had happened – or nearly happened – earlier. If it was a way to embarrass him…

“What do you mean, hot?” Nico asked, frowning at Seb. 

“He’s very close to the fire.” Kimi muttered, returning to his food. Seb sighed in relief. 

“Yeah… That… I’m just a little close…”

“Do you want to swap?” Nico asked, concern covering his face. Seb shook his head.

“It’s alright.” Seb smiled, finally lifting a mouthful of food from his tray. They all ate in silence, unaware of how hungry they were. Fernando finished quickly and resisted the temptation to lean on Mark’s shoulder, as he would have done if they were anywhere but here. He sighed and Mark turned to face him. 

“You alright, bub.” Mark muttered in his ear, leaning close so no one else could hear his pet name for Fernando. Fernando smiled slightly as Mark leaned back away from him, placing his tray on his lap and resting his arm back on Kimi’s bed – around Fernando. Fernando nodded. 

“Am fine. Did not realise how hungry I was.” He smiled. Mark put his fork in his tray and offered the tin to Fernando.

“Have mine.”

“No, Mark. You need to eat as well. Am fine now. I have eaten.”

“Seriously. I can’t stand this shit anymore. You have it.”

“No. You have to eat.” Fernando said sternly. Their murmured conversation had attracted Romain’s attention. Everyone else was either too busy eating, having their own conversation or – in Kimi’s case – not caring enough to listen. Apart from Sergio. He was sucking on his spoon with a small frown on his face, eyes locked on Nico’s bag. 

“It will go to waste if you don’t eat it.” Mark said, placing the tray on Fernando’s lap. Fernando put it back on Mark’s. 

“I will not. You will.” Fernando said, a coy smile on his lips. Mark looked at him dubiously. 

“What makes you so sure?” he asked. Fernando lent close to him and pressed his lips to Mark’s ear, covering them with his hand. 

“Because if you do not you will not be strong enough to try that thing we discussed…” Fernando paused and let a tiny moan escape his lips, not loud enough for anyone but Mark to hear. “Will have to do it all on my own.” Fernando placed a chaste kiss just below Mark’s ear and lent back as Mark returned to eating his food. Fernando smirked as he folded his arms, loving the subtleness and secrecy that had to be applied in public. Mark and he had tried something along these lines before, but never to this extent. Never this open in the public. It had just lead to Mark dragging him through the paddock until he got to his cool down room. That had been a fun day and the anticipation of possibly being found in the Red Bull motor home made it more exciting. Romain noted Fernando’s expression and they way Mark subtly was frantic in swallowing every mouthful as a sign that something different was in the air. 

Kimi wasn’t sure if he had really heard it or if he had imagined it, but whatever it was he had heard a soft moan come from his left. It wasn’t very loud, which is what made him dubious about the fact he may have imagined it. But he’d heard something. He looked over at Fernando and saw his smug persona. Jealous whipped through him as he knew the noise had been real. Fernando had gifted it to Mark in the presence of all of these people. No one else seamed to have heard; it was probably the close proximity of Kimi to the pair that had let him in on their secret. Kimi looked at Seb who was quietly eating his food. He wanted to be sitting next to Seb, whispering things in his ear to make him react like Mark had. Mark had moved slightly closer to Fernando and now their knees were touching. He wanted to make Seb’s pupils dilute just through the sound of his voice like he was sure Fernando’s did when Mark spoke back to him in that soft whisper. For all intents he just wanted Seb to look at him again. Kimi hated this jealousy he felt for his future teammate. He just wanted the feeling to go away but he didn’t know how to make it.

The chatter was stopped just after everyone had finished their breakfast and the two presenters made their way into camp. In the height of getting new people into camp/going to a new camp and breakfast, they had all forgotten about the bush tucker trials. Fernando pushed himself closer to Mark and Mark’s hand that was resting on Kimi’s bed lightly touched the small of his back. Fernando took it subtly in his hand, entwining their fingers and holding it behind them, out of everyone’s view. Fernando smiled up at Mark as the presenters stopped in front of everyone. Kimi tore his eyes away from their entwined finger and shook his head slightly. He hated this feeling. 

“Good morning, and its nice to see you all together here.” Dec said lightly, tapping his cards against the palm of his hand. 

“It’s a little more crowded this morning,” Jenson commented, gesturing to the squashed seating arrangement. 

“Just a little, yes.” Dec replied with a smile. 

“The public have decided on the one driver they would like to see take part in Submerged.” Ant said, bringing his cards out so he could read them. One driver. Everyone looked at each other sending unheard messages of good luck. “In no particular order.”

“Lewis.” Dec said, looking over at the Brit. Lewis didn’t know if he really wanted to take part in Submerge. It sounded a lot like the task Jenson and he had to endure a few days ago. He tried to read the presenters expression but he was looking back at his cards. “It’s not you.”

“Romain.” Ant followed as Lewis sighed in relief. Sergio watched him as he held a confident composure. It gave him a look that nothing could faze him. That was what the audience would see. Sergio wished he could pull that off. “It’s not you.”

“Mark.” Dec said. Fernando rubbed a circle on the back of Mark’s hand but Mark just squeezed it back in reassurance. He looked over at Fernando and smiled before he turned back to the presenters. Kimi turned away from them, folding his arms. He wanted to be across the fire supporting Seb. He could feel an anger burning in him every time he saw one of Mark and Fernando’s little touches. “It’s not you.” Mark nodded and relaxed back into his seat, pulling Fernando a little closer and he hid their hands behind his back. 

“Felipe.” Ant said. Everyone turned their attention to the Brazilian. Lewis was hoping it would be him just as a little pay back for the last trial. He wanted to see the smug stupid look wiped off his face. Felipe was remaining calm. What was the point of worrying about it unless he knew it was him? He smiled calmly at the presenters much to the annoyance of Lewis. “It’s not you.”

“Sebastian.” Dec said. Kimi’s eyes glued on him. All he would need was for Seb not to go anywhere and he could sort out the mess he had made earlier. With the distraction of someone else going off to do a trial he knew he would be able to find somewhere to drag him off to and finish what he had started. The trees he had just looked away from looked very secluded and Kimi was sure there would be no cameras in there. Seb deliberately wasn’t looking at Kimi. Again, he could feel those eyes burning into him but he wouldn’t look at them. Fear of seeing a mocking edge to the captivating blue was too much. He stared intently at the presenters. “It might be you.” Seb sunk back into himself a little and closed his eyes. He didn’t want to do a trial. Not really. Even with the aspect of leaving camp for a while and doing something. Kimi’s mouth fell open a little as he looked at the presenters with a gobsmacked expression. 

“Nico.” Ant said, turning to the other German. Nico was fairly confident he was in the clear on this one. He smiled confidently, smoothening down his hair with one hand as he lent forwards, pretending to be eager. The public wouldn’t want to watch him do a trial if it looked like he wanted to do it. Nico was sure of that. So when Ant said: “It’s not you.” Nico pretended he was upset about that fact, but only a little. His little façade confused Seb as he was sure Nico wouldn’t be that up for a trial. His curiosity faded as he looked around the circle of drivers and tried to wok out who else would be told it might be them: Jenson, Kimi, Fernando and Sergio remained. If he was paired against Jenson or Sergio he may have a chance of not par-taking. 

“Sergio.” Dec said. Seb craned his neck to look at him, passing fleeting looks between the Mexican and the presenters. The silence seemed to drone on and Seb became inpatient. He tapped his foot against the dried leaves of the forest floor, the in-rhythm beat making Sergio nervous, as if it were counting down the second until the inevitable answer. It might be him. He hadn’t done a trial yet; maybe the public would want to know what he was made of. He focused on keeping his breathing normal and trying to appear that he was perfectly fine. “It’s not you.” Sergio’s face broke into a smile as Seb stopped his relentless tapping as sighed. Romain patted Sergio’s knee as if to say ‘I told you so’ and Sergio converted his smile to the Frenchman. 

“Fernando.” Ant said. Fernando mused that he didn’t particularly like the way his name sounded through the presenters’ accents. It sounded wrong and didn’t seem to work on their tongues. Mark squeezed his hand again bringing his mind back to what was happening around him. He was in two minds whether or not he wanted to do the trial. On the one hand he wanted to go and do something, win some meals for the camp. But on the other, if he stayed here he could spend all day with Mark. The latter seemed more appealing as he felt like he hadn’t seen Mark in forever. “It’s not you.” Fernando nodded, just as Mark had, and beamed at the Australian sitting next to him.

“Kimi.” Dec said. Kimi wanted it to be him. He wanted to be able to take Seb’s place and not watch him walk off into an unknown trial. He wanted that opportunity. He felt protective of the young German. He wanted to be able to cross the fire and tell him that, put his arm around his shoulder and say soothing things to calm him. “It’s not you.”

“Which means Jenson,” Ant said as Kimi cursed quietly in Finnish and turned to face Seb. “It might be you.” Nico moved closer to Jenson and put a supportive arm around his shoulder. Lewis glared at him. Since when were Jenson and Nico so close? Maybe the German was playing a tactic; pretend to be supportive to everyone and eager for the challenge so everyone thinks he’s a really nice guy and then win. Lewis became determined, if that was the case, to unveil it as quickly as possible. 

“The public have decided that the celebrity they want to see face Submerged is…” Seb looked over at Jenson. He was a little more confident now that he wouldn’t be doing the trial. Until it dawned on him that Jenson did the last trial. Maybe that meant he was excluded from this one. No. No the presenters would have said if he had been excluded. But the public had already seen Jenson go into a trial and win. Would they want to see that again? Seb looked over at Kimi to see the Finn had his eyes trained on him again. It didn’t help him. Turning back to Jenson didn’t help either because Nico had his arm draped around him, squeezing his shoulder supportively. But when Seb looked back to the presenters he knew what was coming before the words past their lips. 

“Sebastian.” Dec finished and everyone looked at Seb. Some were gobsmacked and others were pleased. Fernando looked to Kimi but the Finn’s face was unreadable. Nico pulled Jenson into a hug as a smile spread on the Brit’s lips. Lewis turned away with a small huff and folded his arms. “So, Sebastian, we will see you at the bush tucker area later.” The presenters waved as they left and the camp sprung into talk about what Seb would have to do. 

“Submerged… I reckon you’ll be submerged in something.” Nico said, letting go of Jenson. 

“Really? How did you know that?” Lewis snapped, turning to his teammate. Nico frowned at him. 

“At least you know it won’t be a human-sized egg timer full of bugs and sand… That was the last trial.” Romain said. Sergio nodded as he finished off his breakfast. Fernando had let go of Mark’s hand and laid back with him, resting his head on Kimi’s bed. Their knees touched and made them both feel content, not participating in the talk about the trial. 

“Maybe it’s like submarine.” Felipe suggested. Everyone looked at him. “You see, Submerged is like Submarine.”

“Also like Subtitle.” Lewis snapped. 

“How does this have anything to do with submerging?” Felipe asked. Lewis just shook his head and looked away again.

“So water? We think he will be submerged in water of some kind?” Jenson asked. There was a hum of agreement and Sergio was glad he didn’t have to do this trial. The thought of going underwater had him feeling a little light headed. He took a shaky sip of water from his bottle to calm himself. 

“He’ll have a time limit, no?” Sergio said.

“They won’t make me hold my breath for ten minutes… Do you think?” Seb said in a shaky voice. 

“Do not be ridiculous, Sebastian, they are putting you in a trial to win meals not kill you,” Fernando muttered with his eyes closed. Mark smiled at him. 

“What I think he’s saying is no. That won’t happen, mate,” Mark said. 

“Right. So water we think?” Seb paused and looked around as everyone nodded at him. He looked back at the floor. “I can work with water…” The random conversations were brought up again and everyone began to break away from the fire and back to their own beds. Seb, Kimi, Fernando, Mark and Romain stayed by the fire, but when Kimi got up to move over to Seb, the German moved away from him, making his way down towards the shower. Fernando’s eyes turned sympathetic as he watched Kimi’s back. The Finn moved over to his bed, behind Mark and Fernando, and lay down. Mark turned to Fernando and pulled the Spaniard’s attention back to him. 

“I was going to go down to the creak and freshen up.” Mark said as Romain got up and started to pile together the trays now empty of food. Fernando smiled and nodded at Mark. 

“Ok. I come with you.” Fernando said, pushing himself up on his feet. Mark smiled as he took Fernando’s outstretched hand and pulled himself up.

“I was hoping you would.” Mark muttered to Fernando, who blushed slightly as he turned to Romain and offered to take the plates and wash them. Romain watched as Mark and Fernando both disappeared off into the trees in the direction of the creak. Every since the yellow team had arrived they seemed inseparable. Romain wasn’t sure if it was just a coincidence or whether they really were joined at the hip. Sergio came back to the fire to ask Romain which hammock he wanted but was stopped but the frown on the Frenchman’s face. Sergio followed his gaze but all he could see was a parting in the trees. He turned back to Romain. 

“What’s up?” He asked, pulling the Frenchman’s attention to him. Romain opened his mouth to ask Sergio what he thought about Mark and Fernando’s closeness but decided against it. It really was too early to tell. 

“Things are weird here, aren’t they.” Romain stated. Sergio nodded, having to agree, as his eyes fell on Nico’s mysterious bag. Romain looked again at the point where Fernando and Mark left together.

Weird.

\- - -

Seb wanted his headphones. Really badly. He felt the need to prepare himself and he could think of no better way to do that than like he did on the build up to a race. Why was he getting so nervous about something a simple as this? The unknown aspect of the trial was haunting him the most. He was pacing in circles around the fire, thinking to himself and totally unaware Kimi was watching him. Everyone else was scattered around the camp doing their own thing. Sergio, Romain, Jenson and Felipe were playing cards with Sergio’s leaves, Kimi was lying on his bed, Mark and Fernando were sitting on Mark’s bed, talking in quiet voices and Nico and Lewis had drawn the short straw of cleaning out the dunny. 

“Seb, you’re making me feel dizzy.” Kimi muttered bringing the German to a stop. Seb gave him a fleeting look before frowning at the floor and continuing in his circle. 

“Don’t watch me then.” He muttered, scuffing his feet through the dirt. Kimi sat up and swung his legs off his bed so he was facing Seb. 

“You should not worry. You will be fine.” Kimi said, leaning forwards and resting his arms on his thighs. Seb gave a scoff. 

“You don’t know that.”

“I do.” Seb stopped and turned to face Kimi, waiting for him to elaborate. He didn’t. 

“How can you possibly? Unless you can see into the future I don’t think you’ve got much chance of knowing.”

“You’re a four-time World Champion. You can do anything.”

“That’s not true… I can’t lick my elbow.”

“Seb.” Kimi said in a stern voice. The intensity of Kimi gaze was too much and Seb dropped his eyes to the floor. Kimi walked over to him and tilted his chin up, making him look at him. “I know you can do this because you’re a winner.” Kimi muttered, brushing his hand down Seb’s neck and onto his shoulder. Seb’s lips parted as his eyes slid to meet Kimi’s. He couldn’t understand what was happening. He was trying to focus on the trial and now Kimi was close to him. Very close. Seb blinked a few times but Kimi was still there. Hand resting softly on his shoulder. As Kimi leaned closer Seb moved away quickly, crossing camp and moving towards the creak. Kimi couldn’t understand. He frowned at Seb’s retreating figure, but before he could take even one step he could feel eyes burning on him. He turned to see both Fernando and Mark hurriedly avert their gaze and drop into a conversation together. Kimi narrowed his eyes at them before turning around and climbing back onto his bed. 

“What the fuck was that?” Mark muttered to Fernando. Fernando shifted round so he could get up. 

“Has been brewing.” Fernando commented, pushing himself to his feet. He glanced at Kimi and noticed the Finn had turned his back to the rest of the camp. Mark caught his arm. 

“Where are you going?”

“Someone needs to go and talk to him.” Fernando said, indicating with his head the direction Seb had disappeared to. Mark nodded. 

“I’ll come as well.” The Australian said and they both headed in the same direction as Seb. Romain took his eyes off his cards as he saw the pair of them disappearing together. He frowned. Nothing seemed to add up anymore. Bored of the confusing thoughts in his head, Romain turned to the other card-players. 

“Do Fernando and Mark go everywhere together?” Romain asked. Jenson’s focus became fixed to his cards as Romain looked around at them all. 

“Pretty much.” Felipe said, moving his cards around and placing another pair on his pile in front of him.

“What do you mean?” Romain directed at the Brazilian. Felipe looked up, a little shocked to have the whole circle’s attention. 

“They do. For sure, you have seen them on race weekends.”

“Well, yeah, but-”

“-Then I do not think I have understood your question.” Felipe said, picking up another card. Romain looked over his shoulder as Nico and Lewis returned into camp. Nico was staring at his hands as if they were revolting and Lewis was saying something about him having washed them four times and he didn’t need to do it again. Romain turned back to the group of card-players. 

“They haven’t been apart since we arrived in camp today.” Romain said, his eyes fixing on Jenson. The Brit was placing a second pair on the table and leaning forwards to pick up another card when he looked at the Frenchman. He blushed slightly. 

“What did I do?” Jenson asked sceptically as he sat back. Romain narrowed his eyes at him slightly. 

“You are close to both of them.” There was a small pause.

“Right…”

“Do you know of anything… Odd?” Jenson looked down at his cards as Sergio took another one off the top of the pile. 

“Nothing odd.” Jenson said. Romain opened his mouth to get him to elaborate but Nico, Lewis and Mark sat down around them, observing the game. Romain frowned at Mark. 

“Where’s Fernando?” he demanded of the Australian. Mark looked up from Jenson’s cards and shrugged. 

“Why would I know, mate?” Mark said, sitting himself more comfortably behind Jenson. Romain looked back over his shoulder to where he knew Mark and Fernando had disappeared with the frown setting on his face. 

“Romain.” Sergio said, pulling the Frenchman’s attention back to the game. “It’s your go.”

Seb and Fernando didn’t return to camp until Seb was called to go for his bush tucker trial. Seb felt almost relieved after talking to Fernando. Maybe sometimes it was good to just air you fears to someone who could understand, Seb thought as he walked back towards the fire with Fernando at his side. Just short of everyone Seb’s eyes fell on Kimi and he gripped the edge of Fernando’s swimming shorts. The Spaniard followed his gaze.

“One thing at a time. First the trial, then you think about this.” Fernando muttered and Seb nodded, letting go. They stopped by the fire. 

“Good luck, Seb,” Jenson called from his chilled position in his hammock – the card game having ended a little while ago. More calls of good luck came and Kimi got to his feet. 

“I will walk you out.” Kimi said. 

“No.” Seb added bluntly, causing the Finn to stop moving from his bed and frown. Seb looked at Fernando before looking at the floor. “I’ve asked Fernando to.” The awkward air settled around them.

“Ok.” Kimi shrugged, falling back into his bed. Seb still didn’t move. Fernando looked to Mark for some kind of help.

“Err… Do you mind if I come to?” Mark said, causing Fernando to close his eyes, shake his head slightly and sigh. Mark rolled his eyes. 

“Sure.” Seb said, looking over at him. Mark got up and crossed over to them as Seb looked at Kimi. Kimi wasn’t looking at him anymore and Seb knew he would need a distraction, some kind of incentive to focus and get all of the meals. And idea struck in his head and he was suddenly grateful he had chosen Fernando to walk him out. Seb called his good-bye to a cheer of good luck he wasn’t sure the Finn had joined in on or not. Mark, Fernando and he walked to the outskirts of camp until they reached the bridge that separated them from the trial areas. 

“Well, good luck then, Seb,” Mark said, shaking his hand. Fernando smiled at him. 

“I’m sure you will do just fine.” The Spaniard beamed. Seb turned to him.

“Do you reckon you would do better than me?” Seb asked, causing Fernando to frown.

“What?”

“In the trial. Do you reckon you would do better than me if you were doing it?” Fernando read the need for competition in his eyes and understood what Seb was asking for. 

“Definitely. Just on skills am much better than you. No team-aided machinery. It would be an easy win for me.”

“Fernando!” Mark said in outrage. They’d come here to support him not tell him he was shit. 

“Some day you’ll have to admit I’m one of the greats.” Seb said.

“That day will not be today… Maybe when I have gone senile.”

“We’ll see.” Seb smiled as he crossed the bridge. He knew Fernando’s words had been somewhat gifted but he could read the truth in them. And that’s what spurred him on as he headed for his bush tucker trial. 

“What the hell was that?” Mark asked, dragging Fernando back towards camp. Fernando stopped him. 

“He asked me to.”

“That’s not really supportive, mate. I know you two don’t really see eye to eye but in here we’re all on the same team.”

“Mark, he wanted me to say those things. He wanted an incentive. You know how he works, he thrives off the challenge and the competition and the pressure.” Without the eyes of everyone else in camp or the cameras, Mark happily pulled Fernando closer to him by his hips. Fernando let his arms snake around his neck. 

“So you were saying them to be nice?” Mark teased. 

“Am not saying was not giving my real opinion.” Fernando smiled as Mark nuzzled his cheek. 

“Thought not. Can’t see you wasting an opportunity.”

“Or you.” Fernando sighed as Mark pushed a hand into Fernando’s hair. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Mark said as he kissed Fernando’s jawline. The Spaniard linked their hands together and pulled Mark into the greenery, off the beaten path. When he stopped, just in the line of trees, Mark pushed him against the closest trunk and stole his lips in a passionate kiss. Once they broke apart Mark rested his forehead on Fernando’s.

“You have no idea how long I have been waiting to do that.” Mark sighed, making Fernando giggle. Fernando tried to push him off him but Mark pulled closer. 

“Mark, we have to go back. People will begin to wonder where we are.” Fernando gasped as Mark began sucking gently on the skin at his neck. Mark ran his hand over Fernando’s stomach and loved the involuntary movement of Fernando pressing his hips into him. Mark kissed the tip of his nose, looking deeply into his eyes. 

“I’d say we’ve got ten minutes.”

\- - -

“How far did they have to go?” Nico said with a confused pout, looking at the entrance to camp no one had returned through yet. Romain and Jenson were at the fire working on lunch with everyone else spread around the camp. Romain looked at Jenson.

“Not that far, would you say, Jenson?” Romain said. Jenson looked up innocently.

“I haven’t been out far since I got here. I’m not sure.”

“Hmm.” Romain hummed sceptically, returning to the food. Jenson looked up at the entrance; having a very good feeling he knew what was taking Mark and Fernando so long to return. 

“So, what’s taking them so long?” Nico asked, sitting up on his bed. 

“No idea.” Jenson said without invitation. Romain gave him a look suggesting he thought Jenson knew something he wasn’t saying. 

“Should we see if we can find them?” Lewis said, getting up.

“Not sure that would be clever.” Kimi murmured from his bed. Everyone looked at him. 

“Why not?” Romain asked. Kimi shot him a ‘leave me alone’ look before turning back to the sky. 

“For sure this is odd.” Felipe said, sitting up on his own bed and looking at the entrance. Everyone’s attention was held by the small gap in the trees apart from Jenson and Kimi. 

“I’m sure they’ll be along in a moment.” Jenson said in an annoyed tone. Romain looked over at him and folded his arms. 

“Why are you being defensive?” The Frenchman asked.

“I’m not being defensive.”

“You are.” Romain confirmed. Jenson stood up and glared at Romain. 

“Are you going to help me with this or pointlessly stare at the trees?”

“Well, I think-”

“-There they are!” Sergio said, pointing at the two figures moving back into camp. Mark was in front of Fernando, whose hair looked like it had been dragged through a bush. No one had a chance to ask the Spaniard what had happened though; as soon as he set foot in camp he dashed from behind Mark and down towards the creak. Everyone watched Mark as he crossed the fire and sat down. They all rounded him – bar Kimi and Jenson - their words overlapped and Mark couldn’t understand any of them.

“Guys, please. One at a time. Only got two ears.” Mark said, holding his ear lobes and wiggling them. Jenson noted he had a very cocky attitude about him. Like he’d just won the biggest piece of chocolate and not had to share it with any of them.

“What the hell happened?” Felipe said.

“Why does Fernando look like a wreak?” Romain said in a sceptical voice.

“What took you so long?” Lewis followed, sending Romain a look of insanity. 

“We were starting to get worried.” Sergio said.

“Did he fall?” Nico said and all eyes fell on him.

“What?” Mark asked.

“His hair was a mess! I’m not surprised he rushed off. It looks like he’s been dragged through a bush or fallen down a hill. That would make sense.” Nico said. Mark loved his naivety. 

“Yes. Fernando fell down the hill and I couldn’t find him. That’s what took so long” Mark lied. 

“Do you want me to go and help him?” Nico asked, thinking Fernando was just trying to sort out his hair. 

“No!” Mark said, standing and taking a hold on Nico’s shoulder. “No. No, thank you. He’ll be fine. He just wanted to…” Mark cleared his throat, trying to find words he thought wouldn’t give away why Fernando really had to run down to the creak to wash himself. “Clean off.” Mark shifted he weight uncomfortably, realising he himself could really use a clean off. He needed everyone’s eyes off him so he could follow Fernando. “There was… Lots of… Dirt.” Mark’s hand fell off Nico’s shoulder. 

“Dirt?” Romain asked in a disbelieving tone. Mark looked at him.

“Yes. Lots of dirt.” Everyone, but Romain, seemed satisfied with Mark’s bizarre tale and moved away, going back to what they were doing before. As they cleared the Australian’s eyes fell on Jenson. Who was smiling at him. With that knowing smile. And his arms folded. Mark got up. 

“Going to clean off yourself?” Jenson smiled, making Mark blush. He caught Mark’s wrist as he passed, looking down at his shorts before returning his gaze. “You dirty bastard.” He smirked. Mark moved closer to him. 

“And aren’t you jealous.” Mark muttered, giving Jenson a wink. Mark sauntered off towards the creak – where Fernando had gone – and all Jenson could do was watch him. He amended his statement in his head. 

Lucky bastard. 

\- - - 

Seb entered the bush tucker area and the first thing he saw was the big lake. At least the camp had managed to guess that right. He walked straight over to Ant and Dec and shook each of their hands. As he did his eyes fell on the large cartoon-looking submarine in the middle of the lake with a jetty attached to the back and running to the opposite bank. He owed Felipe some thanks. 

“So, Sebastian-” Dec started. 

“-Please, call me Seb.” Seb said, with a small smile. Ant and Dec exchanged a look. 

“Ok, Apologise, Seb.” Dec continued. Seb waved his hand, gesturing that it was all right. “Why do you think the public voted for you?” 

“Well, I don’t know, maybe they wanted to see what a World Champion was made of,” Seb smiled.

“As you can see, this is the trial Submerged,” Ant said, gesturing to the submarine in the middle of the lake. Seb folded his arms and surveyed it. “What do you think that might entail?”

“Big submarine in the middle of the lake… Trial called Submerged…” Seb said, feigning considering the facts. He clicked his fingers suddenly and pointed at the presenters. “You’re going to make me eat something.” He joked. Ant and Dec smiled. 

“Yeah, if you could just eat that submarine,” Dec joked and Seb smiled. “Would you like us to explain what you have to do?” Seb smiled and nodded. 

“Alright, so as you can see, the jungle submarine has broken down in the middle of the lake.” Ant said.

“You task is to go into the submarine and collect the stars from within it.” Dec added. 

“There are a total of ten stars up for grabs, one for each campmate.”

“Each star represents one meal.”

“Inside the submarine water will slowly fill over the ten minutes of time you have.”

“In some cases, you will have to dive under the water to retrieve the stars.”

“Does that sound simple enough?” Ant asked. Seb gave them both a sceptical look. 

“Yes… which means there is a catch.” Seb said. Dec smirked. 

“No catch.” Ant continued. “Except-”

“-There you go.”

“It is, of course, a bush tucker trial, so you won’t be alone within the trail.”

“If at any point you want to stop the trial, just say ‘I’m a celebrity, get me out of here.’ And we will stop the trial and get you out of there as soon as possible.” Dec said, consulting his cards. 

“But if you do stop the trial any stars you collect will not count.” Ant finished. Seb gave an understanding nod. 

“Somehow I don’t think we’re going to hear that today.” Dec smiled. Seb shook his head. 

“Not from my lips. I’ve already forgotten the phrase.” Seb smiled. 

“Do you think you’re ready?” Dec asked.

“As I’ll ever be.” Seb said. Dec handed him a pair of goggles as directed him around the bank with some of the rangers. He pulled the goggles on his head and took his water bottle off of his waist. A guy he was introduced to as Bob came over and began explaining about the bugs and animals he would find in the trial and how none of them could seriously hurt him. Seb nodded, understanding that some may nip and hurt but it would just be like getting a scratch or a bruise. Once Bob was satisfied that Seb understood, someone removed the German’s microphone, clipped a black bag onto his waist and he was led down the jetty and climbed onto the top of the submarine. Seb looked down at his feet and to the ladder, trying to work out what would happen next. He was just glad he had decided to put his swimming shorts on. 

“Ok, Seb, you will have ten minutes to complete the trial after the klaxon has sounded.” Dec called. Seb nodded.

“Best of luck.” Ant said as Seb pulled his goggles over his eyes. There was a pause of about five seconds and then the klaxon sounded. Seb climbed down the ladder and dropped into the submarine. He moved straight to the end and pushed his hands into the hole covered with black material. He didn’t want to be told what was in there, he just wanted to find the star and move on. As he passed his hand around the small tub filled with water, he felt the slippery creature slide across his fingers. He automatically recoiled. 

“What the fuck was that?” Seb yelled, reproaching slowly. 

“Water snakes.” Dec said, his voice coming from a speaker somewhere above Seb’s head. He assumed they must have had some microphones set up inside the submarine so he could still be heard. Seb took a deep breath before pushing his hand back into the tub of water snakes. “A minute gone.”

“This is pointless! I can’t find anything!” Seb yelled, getting impatient, as water started to pour in quickly from the other side of the submarine. 

“Try feeling for the star. You might have to spin it off to get it.” Ant said. Seb rolled his eyes as he pushed his hands to the bottom of the tub, his arm sliding into the wall just past his elbow. The water rushed around his ankles and he shivered slightly at its cold temperature. Finally, his fingers clasped on the points of the stars and he spun it quickly, pulling it out and thrusting it in the black material bag attached at his waist. 

“I got one.” He called, moving to the second hole in the wall covered with black material. The water now sloshed around his knees. 

“Excellent.” Dec called. Seb moved straight to the bottom of the second tub and found the star quickly. He tried his best to ignore the feeling of little thin legs crawling over his hand but the squeal of discomfort he tried to suppress from escaping his throat forced its way out. The water now wrapped around his hips and he could hear the presenters trying to suppress their laughter over the tanoid at his stupid squeals. 

“In there you’ve got-” Ant started. 

“-I don’t want to know.” Seb said through gritted teeth as he pulled out the second star. He moved across to the centre of the room and stood on his tiptoes to reach a piece of string that was hanging above his head. There were three of them. 

“They were water spiders in the last container.” Ant finished as Seb pulled on the string and gained another star that fell on him – drifting a little distance away in the still-filling water - and a pile of water beetles dropped on his head. Seb seethed as he waded to the next one, pushing the star he caught into his bag with the others. The water now reached his shoulders. 

“I’m sure I remember mentioning I didn’t want to know what they were.” Seb stated as he pulled the next string, this time expecting the beetles to land on his head. He put the fourth star in his bag. 

“They’re water beetles falling from the ceiling.” Dec said as Seb now swam to the last string. The water finished rising and left him about three foot of air. Seb found it harder to gain purchase on the last string and had to sink just under the water to get the third and final ceiling star out. He hooked an arm around a bar hanging from the ceiling as he put the fifth star in his bag. “Four minutes gone.” Seb’s muscles began to spasm in a shiver as the cold temperature seeped into his skin. He was about four inches too short from being able to stand on the floor and be above the water level. 

“Couldn’t have made this warmer, could you?” Seb asked. 

“Straight from the lake, so no.” Ant said. 

“Thought so.” He muttered, returning to the task at hand. Seb put his head under the water and surveyed what was left to do. He could see three containers resting on the bottom with black lids and holes in the front, letting him know he would have to push his hand in again to retrieve those three. Which meant there were two more he needed to find. He noted the cupboards and storage compartments all around him before he brought his head back up and took a deep breath of air. 

“You alright?” Ant asked in a concerned tone. Seb nodded. 

“Yeah. Just trying to work out what’s left.” He said.

“You’ve got five and a half minutes left.” Dec added. Seb turned himself round, taking a deep breath and intending to head straight for the first of the three boxes on the floor when he saw the little crocodile casually swimming around. Seb panicked. 

“Fuck! What the fuck is that!” Seb yelled, clinging tighter to the bar he was supporting himself on. 

“That’s a baby crocodile, Seb.” Ant said as if it were the most normal thing to have swimming around with you. Seb swallowed.

“How did it get the fuck in here?” Seb said as the small thing began to move towards him. 

“It swam.” Dec said, holding back another laugh. Seb wanted to comment on the fact he didn’t think they were being very professional but he was more interested on what the fucking crocodile was trying to do. No matter what age it still had sharp looking teeth. “Four minutes left.” 

“Fuck!” Seb yelled, annoyed at himself for wasting a minute and a half with a bloody crocodile. He tore his eyes from the little thing and dove under the water swimming straight for the first box. He didn’t need to be told what was in this box. Only the lid had been covered in black and he could clearly see the crabs running around the bottom. The star was tied to a piece of string in the back corner and without a second thought Seb pushed his hand into the box and reached for it. He pushed one of the crabs out of the way to get a better hold of it, but the crab retaliated by giving the back of his hand a small nip. He let out a yell of pain that sent air bubbles rushing to the surface. Now with less oxygen in his lungs, Seb withdrew his hand and pushed himself to the surface. He took a huge gulp of air gripping onto the wall and examining his hand. 

“Three minutes, Seb.” Ant called. Thoughts of the pain in his hand evaporated from his brain and he pushed himself back under the water. Three minutes to get five stars. It was looking a lot harder now. He knew if he didn’t return with ten Fernando would just say he could have got them all. Seb blamed the crocodile. If he hadn’t have faffed around and panicked about it he would have had plenty of time. 

He pushed his hand back into the container of crabs and grabbed at the star. He pulled it but it was tied to the wall. As he went to untie the knot, one of the crabs went for his hand again but missed and caught the string, freeing the star. Seb didn’t bother questioning if that was OK and took the star, putting it in his bag and he raced to the surface, took another gulp of air and returned to the second box. 

Why did they have to be wet and slippery? He couldn’t stand the texture beneath his fingers. The eels seemed more interested in curling around his wrist than him trying to retrieve the star. Their slippery context made untying the knot holding the star that much harder. His impenitence made his beg for breath, but he was determined to get this star. Fingers fumbled on the yellow plastic as he willed his fingers to loosen the knot. Finally, just as his lungs felt they were going to explode, the star gave away with his hand and he pushed back up above the surface. Gasping, he gripped the star tighter as he wrapped his arm around the post to hold himself up. Once he had his breath back, he pushed the yellow plastic into the black bag along with the others. 

“Time?” Seb called, adjusting his goggles and getting ready to dive again. 

“Thirty seconds.” Dec called back. Abandoning the last box, Seb swam under the water and threw open the storage compartments. To his luck, the first drawer he opened held a star and he grabbed at it desperately. As he crossed the submarine to open a cupboard he heard a klaxon signal that his time was up. Pushing off from the floor he resurface, taking a relaxed breath as he did. What he wasn’t ready for was the small crocodile to be right by his face. He screamed in shock and sent the poor little thing swimming away from him as fast as it could. 

“Shit.” Seb sighed, placing a hand on his chest. 

“Alright, Seb. That’s your time up. If you make your way back to the ladder and climb out we’ll see how you did.” Ant said as Seb swam over to the ladder. He was happy to be hit by the hot Australian sun, as he emerged, realising only now that he had kept his shirt on and it was soaked. One of the rangers helped him out of the submarine and put his microphone back on him. He was then checked for any bugs but he was all clear. Seb had been happy it hadn’t been a trial where he had to be covered in bugs. He headed back over to the presenters after Bob had given him back his water bottle. 

“How was it?” Dec asked as Seb pulled off his shirt. He threw it at Dec and it hit him in the face, causing Ant to laugh. 

“Wet.” Seb said with a smile. Dec threw him back his shirt. 

“Not a fan of crocodiles then?” Ant asked, folding his arms. 

“Apparently not.” Seb said, looking back at the submarine he had just come from. “Is the little one alright? I wasn’t ready for it to be that close.”

“Yeah, he’s fine.” Dec said, pointing at Bob who was stroking a content looking baby crocodile. Seb sighed in relief. 

“Good.”

“So let’s see how well you did. If you want to empty you bag out of stars and we’ll see how many you’ve got.” Ant said. Seb put his shirt on the floor with his water bottle and pulled out the stars one by one. He began handing them to Ant, but after the presenter had thrown them all to the floor Seb followed suit until a small pile was made. Eight. He had got eight stars. Only two he missed which he would blame on the crocodile and the crab. That wasn’t his fault… entirely. He was happy with his eight and smiled at the presenters. “Eight. That’s not bad at all.”

“A nice big meal for the first day of full camp I think.” Seb smiled. He looked down at his hand and examined the red mark, rubbing his finger over it. 

“What’s that?” Dec asked.

“Just where the crab caught me. He didn’t want me to take the star.” Seb muttered, brushing it off like it didn’t matter. Still, Bob was called over to examine it. Seb hated the fuss. He knew it wasn’t much of an injury. More like a bruise than anything else. And Bob confirmed that. Seb rolled his eyes. 

“Well, congratulations on getting eight meals for camp today, we’ll let you go back and tell them the good news.” Ant said. Seb shook both of their hands and left the bush tucker area behind him. He draped his soaked shirt over his shoulder and carried his bottle in his hand. Just as he was going to cross the bridge the interviewer and a cameraman stopped him, asking him about the trial. 

“It was good. Fun. I kind of enjoyed it. Not sure if that’s a bad thing or not but it was nice to get out of camp and do something. And the camp is going to be happy with eight meals. It’s a little annoying personally that I couldn’t get all ten, but you can’t do everything perfectly.” Seb smiled at the interviewer thanked him, letting him cross the bridge. 

“I still cannot believe you told them I fell.” Fernando muttered to Mark as Romain and Kimi came back from washing up the trays from lunch. Seb’s still sat by the fire keeping warm. 

“Would you have preferred I told them the truth?” Mark asked. Fernando shook his head.

“No. Of course not. You just make me sound clumsy.”

“In all fairness, you were.”

“Not as bad as you.”

“Is it my fault you make me weak at the knees?” Mark cooed in Fernando’s ear, causing the Spaniard to stupidly giggle. 

“Why isn’t Seb wearing his shirt?” Lewis called across the camp. Everyone turned to see Seb come into camp with his shirt over his shoulder and a grin on his face. His hair looked ruffled and messy and Kimi forced himself not to lick his lips. 

“How did it go?” Kimi asked to the surprise of everyone. Most people put his interest down to the prospect of food. 

“Obviously well; he’s smiling.” Nico called, propping himself up on his elbows from his sunbathing position on the floor. 

“I got eight meals.” Seb said happily to a cheer of gratitude. Everyone moved over to Seb to shake his hand and hug him, offering their congratulations. They all mulled around the fire as Seb explained what he had had to do on his trial, intrigued by the new story. 

“I wouldn’t have been able to do that.” Sergio said openly as Seb finished, pulling his knees close to his body. “Having to dive under water.” He wrinkled his nose in discontent. 

“So that’s eight meals tonight. A nice haul of food then.” Jenson said, rubbing his hands in anticipation. 

“Yes. Well done Sebby.” Nico smiled, pulling his co-German in for a second hug. 

“But only eight, not ten.” Fernando teased and Seb stuck his tongue out at him. 

“You’ll have your time.” Seb countered as Nico let him go, heading back to his sunbathing spot. Romain handed him his lunch. “When you get called to do a trial we will see just how many you get.”

“Above eight and I beat you.” Fernando said, accepting the challenge. Seb just sat down on a log and ate his food. 

After lunch, Seb joined Nico on the mattress-covered area he was sunbathing in and hoped his pale skin could be made more appealing by the sun. He was jealous of the caramel ting Fernando’s skin seemed to radiate and it just seemed to be over emphasised in this heat. Just as Seb was relaxing into his patch of sun he felt someone lay beside him. Very closely. He cracked one eye open and immediately wished he hadn’t. A topless Kimi had dropped into place beside him. Seb looked round to try and find Fernando but the Spaniard was not in his line of vision. Kimi picked up his hand the crab had attached and rubbed a finger over the red mark. Seb forgot how to breathe.

“What’s this?” Kimi frowned, looking down at it. Seb tried to pull his hand from Kimi’s grip but the Finn didn’t let go. 

“Just where a crab caught me. It’s not a big deal.” Seb said in a blasé tone. Kimi turned to look at Seb and understood that he hated seeing the pain on his skin, even if it really wasn’t something that was that painful. Finally, he felt like he had a proper understanding of what he felt for Seb.

“I need to explain something.” Kimi muttered. Seb swallowed, instantly blushing at the way Kimi’s nakedness made him feel. 

“Sergio.” Romain called, crossing over to the Mexican carrying a laminate in his hand. Sergio’s eyes fell on it then back up to the Frenchman. 

“Yes.”

“We’ve been selected to do a Dingo Dollar Challenge?” Romain said, obviously confused by the instructions he had been given. Sergio took the offered sheet and read it himself. It didn’t make much sense to him either. 

“Dingo Dollars?” Sergio said. Romain replied with a shrug. “Jenson.” Sergio said, moving through camp to find Jenson by the fire with Lewis, Fernando and Mark. All four of them looked up. “What’s a Dingo Dollar Challenge?”

“You’ve got one?” Jenson asked in the tone of an excited child. Sergio nodded. 

“Romain and me have to go and do one.”

“Sweet!” Jenson smiled at everyone but no one, apart from Lewis, could understand his excitement. Jenson sighed. “It’s a little task or activity you have to do to win a treat. Or, well, possibly win a treat. You do the challenge, win the Dingo Dollars and then take them to a little shack to ‘buy’ a treat. It will be one of two things. You tell Kiosk Keith which-”

“-Kiosk Keith?” Mark laughed. Jenson shot him a look.

“Yes, Mark.” Jenson said and then turned back to Sergio. “You tell him which thing you want and then we have to answer a question and if we get it right we win the treat.”

“Does sound like fun.” Sergio smiled.

“Unless we get covered in bugs.” Romain commented. Jenson shook his head. 

“It’s not like a bush tucker, it’s fun.” The Brit smiled. A few minutes later, when Romain and Sergio had got their bits together, the pair left the camp for their Dingo Dollar Challenge, leaving the camp discussing what treat they might possibly win. 

When Sergio and Romain got to the challenge clearing they both stopped, confused. In front of them was lots of washing lines at the entrance and leading to a rectangular pool filled with foamy soap and had a ladder at the opposite end dropping into it. To the left of the pool there was a golden washing machine with a bag of what they assumed was Dingo Dollars. Above the pool was a chair suspended in the trees by rope and a bucket hanging next to it with a tube coming out of the bottom and into the pool. Romain and Sergio exchanged a confused look.

“What the hell?” Romain said, walking around the area and noticing the Dingo Dollars in the washing machine. He tried to pull the door open but came to no avail. That, he thought, was obviously what would open when they won the challenge. He looked over to Sergio. “I found the money.”

“Good. Let’s take it and go.” Sergio said, eyeing the water suspiciously with folded arms. Romain shook his head. 

“We have to do the challenge to get the door open.”

“Of course.” Sergio exasperated. He began to move around the arena looking for someone who could explain what they had to do. Romain headed back to the entrance and found the little laminate pinned to the tree a little late. 

“Sergio, I found the instruct-” Romain was interrupted by a splash and he saw Sergio fall into the pool. He rushed over and tried to help the flailing Mexican. “Get to the ladder.” Romain called. Sergio stopped panicking when his foot hit the bottom of the pool and he stood himself up, the water only coming to his hips. He waded over to the ladder and climbed out, covered in foam.

“Who leaves a pool there?” Sergio seethed, trying to brush all of the foam off him. Romain had already moved back to the instruction and Sergio followed him. 

“Here you go,” Romain said, tilting the laminate towards him to read it: 

“Dirty money that needs a clean,  
Trapped inside the washing machine,  
The drum fills up when you wring the clothes,  
Release the dollars when it overflows.”

“Right.” Sergio said, still none the wiser of what they needed to do. Romain looked over the area. 

“We have to take the clothes, fill them with water and then wring them in the bucket and send the water into the washing machine.” Romain said, tracking the path with his finger as he spoke.

“Sounds simple enough.” 

“Which makes me think we’re missing something.” Romain said, looking around. Sergio shrugged and moved back towards the pool. 

“Let’s start with that and then if we stumble across a problem we’ll deal with it then.” Sergio said as Romain joined him. 

“Alright.” Romain agreed, giving a nod. He turned to Sergio. “You go up in the chair.” The Mexican went to open his mouth to argue, but from the falling in incident earlier, Romain had a point. They were both provided with water boots which they swapped with their normal trekking shoes. Sergio moved over to the chair and someone unseen lowered it, allowing him to climb on. As he was raised back up to the bucket’s height, Romain took of his beige shirt that had his name and phone number on the back and put it on top of a huge box of washing powder. He stood in his dark green vest (with his name and number on it) and red shorts at the ladder. Sergio looked down at him from his position in the air.

“Do we just start?” Sergio called. Romain looked up and shrugged at him, but as soon as the Frenchman gave the action a klaxon sounded, scaring Sergio who rocked back dangerously on his chair. He clutched at the supporting ropes and pulled himself back into a sitting position. Romain started by dashing around the pool and grabbing as many clothes as he could, throwing them in the pool as he passed. They didn’t know if there was a time limit and were determined to get this done as quickly as possible. Once he had throw about twenty items in the pool, Romain jumped in after them. 

“How good are you at catching?” Romain asked as he plunged a Hawaiian shirt under the water, soaking it through.

“That’s probably something we should have discussed before we started.” Sergio laughed. Romain balled up the shirt and threw it to Sergio who caught it one handed. Just as the Mexican went to begin wringing, Romain noticed a floor in their plan. 

“Wait!” Romain called. Sergio halted. Romain’s eyes were on the tube running from the bucket to the pool he was standing in. “If you pour the water down that now it’s just coming straight back to me.” 

“That’s a good point,” Sergio agreed, looking towards the washing machine. He saw the second tube sticking out of the side of the machine easily. “There! There is a second tube. You’ve got to connect them.” Sergio said, pointing. Romain followed the direction of his hand and pulled himself out of the pool, grabbing the tube connected to the bucket as he did. He was happy to find the two tubes fitted together easily and he connected them, giving Sergio thumbs up to start wringing. Romain watched the deep blue fluid pour down the tubes and into the washing machine. Once Sergio could get no more water out of the shirt he threw it onto the bank. Romain detached the tubes and the blue liquid poured onto his hands. 

“Shit.” Romain said as he dropped the tube connected to the bucket and pushed the one on the washing machine back into place.

“Romain!” Sergio called, pointing at the rest of the blue fluid that was pouring onto the flood. Romain swore in French grabbing the leaking tube. 

“It’s blue!” Romain growled, looking at his hands. 

“Never mind the colour, you’ve got to work out how to stop it doing that. We’re loosing too much water.” Sergio said. Romain looked around him and clipped it into place where an item of clothing had hung before. He looked in the tube and saw what was left had piled in the bend in the middle of the tube. Satisfied, Romain jumped back into the pool. They worked like this for a little while, with Romain checking how much they had left until they reached the overflow line every now and again, until both of them started to get a little bored. Romain had just checked the washing machine, about a quarter left to fill, and jumped back in the pool when Sergio’s boot hit him on the head. 

“Ow! Hey!” He yelled, rubbing the point of impact. “What was that for?”

“I’m bored of this. It was fun but now it’s just tiring. I thought-”

“-Is that really a justifiable reason to throw your shoe at me?” Romain scowled. 

“I threw my shoe at you so you can fill it up. We’ll get much more water quicker that way.” Sergio said as Romain collected his shoe. “I didn’t mean to hit you.”

“Are we allowed to do that?” Romain asked, looking up at Sergio.

“Who cares. I’m bored and you’re beginning to look more and more like a Smurf.” Sergio smiled as Romain looked at his blue-tinted skin. The Frenchman nodded and filled Sergio’s shoes, standing directly beneath him and throwing it up to him. The shoe was filled quite high, so when Sergio caught it, it sprayed water all over him. Romain couldn’t help but laugh as Sergio smiled and pulled the bucket towards him. He waited for Romain to climb out but the Frenchman didn’t move. “What are you doing?”

“Throw me your other shoe.” Romain said, reaching his hands up. Sergio toed it off and it fell into the water in front of Romain, splashing water up at him. Sergio laughed.

“We definitely made the right decision putting me up here.” Sergio laughed as Romain stuck his tongue out at him and began to fill his second shoe. “Are you going to-?”

“It’s clipped in the air. We can save time if you pour that in and I only connect the tubes when it’s full.” Romain said, poised to throw the second shoe back to Sergio. The Mexican nodded and poured the water into the bucket. They both froze to watch the blue water pour down the tube and were relieved when it didn’t shoot out the end. 

They were moving much faster with this technique and when Romain did leave the water again to connect it to the washing machine, getting a face full of blue fluid as he released the pressure much to the amusement of Sergio, they only had a very small amount left until it overflowed. Romain filled both of Sergio’s shoes one last time and threw them to him, climbing out of the water to complete the circuit. As Sergio poured half of the last shoe in, the washing machine door sprung open and the Dingo Dollars poured out. Completely forgetting the tube, Romain dropped it to retrieve the bag and, again, got hit with the blue fluid, this time dying his legs. Sergio laughed as Romain picked up the bag and walked back over to him. 

“We won!” Romain smiled and Sergio applauded them from the sky. 

“Great. Get me down so we can go and get our treat.” Sergio beamed. A playful smirk took over Romain’s face. 

“Or I could leave you there.” Panic danced in Sergio’s eyes. 

“No you can’t.”

“I don’t see you looking very blue.”

“Romain, let me down now.” Sergio shot, folding his arms. Romain started to walk out of the clearing. “Romain! Come back! Don’t leave me here!” Sergio yelled, trying to get himself out of the chair. He heard Romain’s laughter before the Frenchman came back into view and the rangers lowered the chair, helping Sergio out and onto his feet. Romain was still laughing as he and Sergio left the area. “That wasn’t funny.”

“I think it was.” Romain sighed happily. Sergio shot him a look. 

“Next time I’ll abandon you in the middle of the woods.” Sergio muttered. Romain put his arm around Sergio’s shoulders.

“You don’t really think I would have left you there.” Romain said and by reading his facial expression Sergio knew Romain wouldn’t have done that. He shook his head and relaxed as the interviewers split them off and got them to retell the events of the trial. Once both were satisfied they were pointed in the direction of the Outback Shack and told they could go and get their treat. As they got in sight-range of the Outback Shack a chalkboard was resting against a tree telling them what they could get. Everything was one hundred Dingo Dollars so they assumed that was how many they had won.

“Cheese and biscuits or Marshmallows?” Sergio asked, his mouth salivating slightly at the anticipation of either. Mainly the Marshmallows, but Romain was French.

“Cheese and biscuits are so good…” Romain said, humming contently. 

“But we have to think about what the others would want.” Sergio put forwards, his eyes focusing on the word ‘Marshmallows’ written in white chalk. Romain pulled his shirt back on and put his hat on his head before looking back at Sergio. 

“You think the others would prefer marshmallows?”

“I know Mark has a sweet tooth. Jenson likes cake, so sweet things. Seb’s like a little kid when it comes to sweets…”

“But what about Kimi, Felipe, Nico?”

“Get what you want.” Sergio said, feeling he might loose this one. Unfortunately for Romain, Sergio had made a point. This was a treat for everyone and he knew everyone would like the marshmallows and some wouldn’t want the cheese and biscuits. 

“Let’s get the marshmallows.” Romain smiled. Sergio’s eyes lit up.

“Really?”

“I’m sure they will go down better than cheese and biscuits with everyone.” Romain said as he led Sergio to the kiosk. A man with a moustache stood behind the counter and gave them a placid look. He reminded both of the drivers of Kimi – bar the moustache. As they approached they saw the laminate on the countertop. Sergio picked it up, hoping it didn’t tell then they had to do something else to get their treat. Well, they didn’t have to.

“Welcome to the Outback Shack.” Sergio read. “Here you can spend your well-earned Dingo Dollars. First you must choose which of the two items you would like to buy-”

“-The marshmallows.” Romain added and Sergio nodded, carrying on. 

“Then your campmates will be asked a multiple choice question. If they get the question correct, you will leave with your chosen goodie. If they get it wrong you will leave with nothing.” Sergio finished, putting the laminate back on the countertop. 

“They better get the question right, I don’t want to have done all of that for nothing.” Romain said, looking at his blue stained hands. He hit the little bell on the countertop. The man looked at him, waiting for him to speak. Romain and Sergio exchanged a look. “Err… Marshmallows please.” Romain said passing over the bag of Dingo Dollars. The man took the bag and turned away from them, making a call on his telephone. Romain and Sergio watched as someone turned the chalkboard that was on the wall to reveal the question. 

Back in camp, Jenson was staring at the telephone box. He had been for at least half an hour now. Mark came over for the fifth time to check he was still mentally stable. 

“Jenson, what are you doing?” Mark asked, crouching down next to the Brit and handing him a cup of tea. Jenson, sitting crossed-legged on the floor, didn’t take it. Mark put it by his knee. 

“Any minute now. They’ve been gone long enough.” Jenson smiled, not taking his eyes off the phone. Mark looked round at Fernando, Nico, Seb, Felipe and Lewis - who were all watching his futile attempt to get Jenson to move – for support. They all shrugged. 

“No one has called that phone since we got here, Jense.” Nico called. No one moved, all waiting for Jenson to respond. As Lewis got up to force him away from his little position, the phone rang. Everyone in camp – bar Jenson – looked at it in amazement. Jenson jumped up and threw the door open, grabbing the phone. Kimi moved over to see what the commotion was about. 

“Hello?” Jenson asked down the receiver. Mark picked up his abandoned cup of tea and everyone watched him. 

“Sergio and Romain won this afternoon’s Dingo Dollar challenge.” A gruff, Australian accent called down the phone. Jenson smiled. 

“Excellent.”

“But in order for them to bring back their prize, you must answer the following question correctly.”

“Ready for a question?” Jenson asked the camp, opening the door of the London red phone box. Everyone nodded. “Shoot.” Jenson directed down the line.

“What is the total combined age of all ten campmates?”

“What is the total combined age of all ten campmates?” Jenson echoed to the camp.

“A, three-hundred and two or B, three-hundred?” the man asked Jenson. Jenson didn’t read out his answers yet as the others were working out everyone’s age. 

“You’re Kiosk Keith, right?” Jenson asked, unable to stop himself.

“Yes, I am.”

“Awesome.” Jenson smiled before pushing himself into the calculation.

“Is Sergio twenty-three or twenty-four?” Mark asked Jenson.

“Twenty-three.”

“Ok, so that’s two-hundred and one.” Seb said. “Fernando?”

“Thirty-two.” The Spaniard said.

“Two-hundred and thirty-three.” Seb said, moving on to Kimi.

“Thirty-four.” Kimi muttered. Seb blushed a little.

“Ok… So that’s… Erm…”

“Two-hundred and sixty-seven.” Felipe said with a helpful smile. 

“Right, thank you. Two-hundred and sixty-seven.” Seb said, averting his eyes to Jenson.

“I knew that.” Lewis said to Felipe.

“But I said it.” Felipe smiled.

“Yes, but-”

“-Can you save you’re domestic until after we’ve answered the question?” Mark threw in, turning back to Seb. “Two-hundred and sixty-seven.”

“Plus Jenson.” Seb said.

“Thirty-three.” Jenson said, smiling as he had already worked out the answer and it matched one Keith had provided. 

“Three-hundred.” Seb concluded. 

“Everyone agree?” Nico asked, replied with a resounding yes. Everyone looked to Jenson.

“Our answer is three-hundred.” Jenson smiled. Everyone waited to hear if they had got the question right. Jenson hung the phone back on the hook. “He hung up.”

“This is a bit rude.” Felipe said, folding his arms.

“Did he tell you if we got it right?” Nico asked. Jenson shook his head. 

“We’ll know depending on whether or not Sergio and Romain return with a treat.” Lewis said as they moved back towards the fire.

“So, we have no idea?” Fernando asked as Mark handed Jenson his tea.

“He gave me two answers and the number we came up with matched one of them.” Jenson said, finally sitting down by the fire. Mark took a seat next to Fernando. 

“What was the other answer?” The Spaniard asked. 

“Three-hundred and two.”

“They are close.” Seb said, suddenly doubting his own math skills. 

“I’m sure we will be right.” Jenson smiled. Around five minutes later they heard the happy calls of Romain and Sergio. Everyone turned to see them re-enter camp, Romain in front. 

“How’d it go?” Lewis called. Romain explained what they had to do in the challenged and once he had finished Sergio produced the wooden box from behind his back and everyone cheered. He took off the lid to reveal ten marshmallows and everyone moved forwards to get one. Some just popped them in their mouths whilst others (Fernando, Nico, Lewis, Jenson and Sergio) speared them and let them melt over the fire for a little bit. No one was unhappy as the light began to dim and they all waited for dinner. Everyone agreed that marshmallows were a better choice than cheese and biscuits – eventually.

Shortly after, the bag appeared to deliver the meal Seb had won by collecting eight stars. Romain and Jenson set about cooking as Mark cut up the turkey crown they had been provided with. Most people were just glad it was something they recognised and knew what tasted of. Romain fried the potatoes into chips whilst Jenson boiled the vegetables. They put together a very nice meal that silenced the camp as they focused on eating. Just as Fernando was cleaning out the bottom of his tray, having saved a coupled of fried potatoes chips until last, did he speak. 

“Is so bad for me.” Fernando commented, putting his penultimate, oil-fried chip in his mouth. Mark turned to face him, having already finished his own meal.

“What do you mean?”

“Not on my diet. My trainer will go mental.”

“Trust you to be thinking about that right now.” Mark smiled. Fernando ate his last chip and piled his plate on Mark’s. He swallowed and let out a satisfied noise. 

“Is all I think about when it comes to food.”

“You’ve got to admit,” Nico said as he finished his own food. Everyone who had finished looked over at him. “These chips are better than your leaves.” 

“My leaves were fine.” Fernando said, relaxing back in his chair and closing his eyes. He placed his hands on his content stomach. 

“Leaves?” Mark asked. Fernando cracked open an eye to look at him. 

“He tried making leaf-crisps because he was bored of rice.” Kimi said with a little smirk.

“They tasted of oak.” Jenson added, finishing up himself.

“You didn’t miss anything.” Seb said from beside Kimi. “They were horrible.”

“Were not that bad!” Fernando protested, but everyone just smirked at him. 

“Do you have any left?” Felipe asked. Fernando shot him a sceptical look.

“Yes.”

“And why is this?” Romain smiled, already knowing the answer. Fernando blushed slightly. 

“No one wanted them.”

“Not even you?” Lewis said with a smirk. Fernando shrugged.

“Will eat another. And another after that. Was trying to be nice and share them.”

“I’ll try one tomorrow then,” Mark said and Fernando beamed at him. Kimi looked away from them, dragging his finger around his tray harshly, trying to force away his jealousy. Romain just stared at them confused whereas Jenson smirked at them. No one else seamed to notice a change. 

“I’ll pass.” Lewis said.

“But these chips were better than them. That’s all I was saying.” Nico said with a small huff.

“That’s because you’re supposed to eat potato.” Lewis smiled. Fernando seemed to miss it though. Everyone began to disperse through the camp again. Fernando and Mark offered to wash up and Lewis happily shifted what was supposed to be his duty that night. Romain watched them go as Sergio noticed Nico swing his bag on his back and walk to the outskirts of camp before crouching down with his back to them all and going into it. 

“Something is not right.” Romain said to the young Mexican, eyes still on Fernando and Mark. Sergio hummed in agreement, still watching Nico. 

“He’s hiding something.” Sergio mused, folding his arms. Romain turned to see Sergio looking over in the other direction. 

“We worked well together today,” Romain said, an idea forming in his head. Sergio turned to him and nodded. 

“Yeah, it was fun.”

“Want to work together again?” Romain asked. Sergio looked at him confused. 

“What do you mean?”

“You want to know what’s in Nico’s bag and I want to know what’s up with Fernando and Mark.” Romain said in a hushed voice. Sergio looked to the point the Australian and Spaniard had disappeared to.

“Fernando and Mark?”

“Something is odd.” Romain said, following Sergio’s gaze. Sergio looked at him. 

“I hadn’t noticed anything.”

“Well I have. And Jenson knows what I’m talking about.”

“Woah.” Sergio muttered, his eyes finding Nico as he moved back into camp and sat on his bed, putting his bag behind him. Romain turned back to him, holding out his hand. 

“So you help me and I’ll help you?” Romain asked.

“Like detectives?” Sergio said with excitement in his voice. Romain let out a little laugh. 

“If you want.” Sergio took his hand and shook it.

“OK.”

From across the camp, Jenson saw but didn’t hear Romain and Sergio’s exchange. He swallowed nervously as they shook hands. He knew Romain was on to the fact something was going on between Fernando and Mark and if they weren’t careful, they were about to be exposed on national television.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next trial is Hang Glider Of Hell and only ONE driver will take part. Kimi is ruled out of this trial for medical reasons, so please DO NOT vote for him (if anyone watches the show you'll understand this had to appear somewhere :P). The voting will close at 9:00pm UK time on the 8th January.
> 
> Please keep voting for relationships you want, if you want any others, even if one of the drivers already has a pairing. Voting for relationships will end just before send offs begin. I will remind you closer to the time.
> 
> I also need you to select the pair you want to see partake in the next Dingo Dollar Challenge. This will also close on the 8th. Please either select:  
> Kimi and Seb  
> Nico and Jenson  
> Fernando and Mark OR  
> Lewis and Felipe  
> This will keep going until all of these pairs are used, then we will start again.
> 
> VOTING FORMATS:  
> Hang Glider - Grosjean  
> Dingo Dollar - Jenson/Nico
> 
> As long as your voting is clear do not worry about it being exactly to my formats.
> 
> Thank you for reading and voting. I hope you still are enjoying this fic.


	7. Day Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone's got secrets to hide

Romain hadn’t slept. He just lay on his side, clutching his pillow with pictures of Marion and his son on it. He couldn’t leave this; Mark and Fernando were hiding something. His eyes were fixed on the point in the shadows by the fire where he knew the two were sleeping. Soft snoring filled the clearing and let Romain know he was the only one awake. He sent a look over to Sergio who had moved the lamp that was between Mark and Fernando by his head. Sleeping. Everybody was. Romain climbed out of his hammock and moved over to Mark. He just looked at him for a moment, his eyes adjusting to the darkness to make out Mark’s features. He shook his shoulder slightly and the Australian stirred. Mark’s eyes fluttered open and he yelled in shock as the Frenchman’s face came into focus, leaning over him. Fernando stirred in his sleep and Romain shot him a fleeting look, but the Spaniard didn’t wake.

“Fucking hell, Romain. You trying to give me a heart attack?” Mark muttered, rubbing his eyes sleepily. Mark took in the fact it was still dark and frowned at Romain, who was now walking towards Fernando. “What time is it?”

“I do not know.” Romain said, checking Fernando was still asleep. He was. Mark swung his legs off his bed and pulled on his boots. 

“Bloody early telling from the sky, mate.” Mark yawned. Romain sat down by the fire with his back to Mark. Mark frowned at him. “What’s going on?”

“We need to talk.” Romain muttered, poking at the fire. Mark sent Fernando a look.

“About?” Mark queried, moving to the end of his bed and looking into Fernando’s hammock at his face. Mark nearly laughed to see him cocooned in green material but the softness in his face made it so tempting to stroke his features. Romain had turned to face Mark, unaware to the Australian. 

“This.” Mark looked back to Romain and blushed violently. He reluctantly pushed himself away from Fernando slightly. 

“What’s ‘this’?” Mark tried innocently. Romain rolled his eyes at Mark and turned back to the fire. Making sure Romain wasn’t looking; Mark brushed his fingers along Fernando’s cheek and moved his hair out of his face. Fernando sighed in his sleep as a small smile pulled at his lips. Mark crossed to Romain. “What’s ‘this’?” Mark asked again when he was standing beside Romain. Romain kept his focus on the fire. 

“You know what I am talking about.” Romain sighed, turning the stick in his hands nervously. 

“I don’t” Mark said, taking a seat next to Romain. Romain turned to face him. 

“Fernando and you-”

“-Are friends.” Mark said calmly, making Romain frown. He couldn’t believe that all those little moments he was sure he had seen were just between friends. There was something odd about their friendship… Right?

“I do not understand.”

“Fernando and I are friends.” Mark said more firmly. Romain blinked at him. 

“You are lying?” Romain tried to sound confident but his statement sounded more like a question. 

“I’m not, mate.” Mark sighed, sliding onto the floor and leaning his back against the bench. Romain frowned deeper. He was sure of what he was seeing. He was sure of it. Mark closed his eyes, finding the position he had obtained for his first three nights in the jungle surprisingly comfortable. 

“But you’re so close.” Romain said with indignity. Mark looked back up to him. 

“We’re just friends.” There was a pause where Romain held Mark’s stern gaze.

“Then why were you gone for ten minutes yesterday after you walked Seb out?” Romain accused. Mark sighed, turning back to the fire. 

“Fernando fell down the hill, I was trying to find him.” Romain watched Mark as he spoke. 

“Bollocks.” Romain said, folding his arms. Mark turned back to him. 

“Romain, you don’t have a clue what you’re talking about. Could it just be, maybe, that you’re missing Marion a lot and it’s making you see things? Things that aren’t happening?” Mark said, holding his gaze. Romain fidgeted uncomfortably. “Tell me, can anyone else see what you’re talking about if you ask them?”

“I asked Sergio and he said he couldn’t see it…” Romain muttered, looking down at his hands. Mark sighed in relief at Sergio’s ignorance. He would have to talk to Fernando tomorrow; obviously they were being too obvious. 

“Right. Don’t worry about it, mate. You’re just missing Marion. It’s understandable.” Mark said patting his shoulder. “In the same way Jenson is missing Jess and Felipe is missing Rafaela-”

“-Jenson! Jenson can see something! He won’t tell me but I know he can!” Romain suddenly outburst, sitting forwards. Mark’s eyes flashed with panic but he soon regained himself, scoffing at Romain. Romain looked at Mark as if he were delirious. 

“I wouldn’t listen much to what Jenson says,” Mark commented, folding his arms. “Big tease. He’s just joking around.” Mark looked at the fire; feeling satisfied that he had dodged a bullet.

“Who’s just joking around?” A voice called from behind them. Mark swallowed as Jenson took a seat beside him. Romain’s eyes glowed excitedly in the firelight. 

“Apparently you, but you can see something is going on between Mark and Fernando… Right?” Romain said, turning to the Brit. Jenson looked between Mark and Romain slightly confused. It was hard to take Jenson seriously when his hair was sticking up at weird angles from his head. Mark mused that Fernando’s would probably look the same. He shook his head slightly, pulling himself back to the conversation, begging Jenson with his eyes to defer Romain from whatever he was trying to achieve. 

“Mark and Fernando? Nah, just close friends.” Jenson smiled, sliding down next to Mark. Mark smiled back at him. Romain frowned again. 

“But you said-”

“-I didn’t say anything.” Jenson corrected, getting comfortable next to Mark. Romain stood up. 

“Fine. Lie to me. I do not care. I know I am right.”

“Why do you care so much?” Mark asked. Romain glared down at him. 

“I do not, but I know I am right! Do not see why you have to lie.”

“I told him I think he’s just missing Marion, seeing things.” Mark explained to Jenson. Jenson just nodded. 

“Am not just missing Marion! I know there is something different going on between you I just cannot figure out what!” Romain shot.

“Romain, calm down; you’ll wake the whole camp up.” Jenson sighed.

“Why are you up anyway?” Mark asked Jenson.

“Someone yelled my name.” Jenson said. Romain blushed slightly but he still wasn’t finished with Mark. 

“Why can you not just tell me?” He spat at the Australian. Mark looked up at him.

“Because there is nothing to tell.” Mark’s voice became clipped as he was getting more annoyed at Romain and his stupid questions. “Really sorry to disappoint.” He added sarcastically. Romain huffed as he turned and headed back to his bed. Mark watched him go, letting his arms fall down to his side. 

“I will find out, Mark. I know there is something going on.” Romain called across camp, falling heavily into his hammock. Jenson turned on Mark. 

“Want to let me know what the hell that was about?” Jenson asked. Mark shook his head and got to his feet. 

“Sorry for waking you up.” Mark sighed. Jenson joined him on his feet and held his shoulder. 

“I know it wasn’t you. And don’t worry; I can barely sleep here anyway.” Jenson looked at Mark’s face, still not letting go of him. Mark sighed. 

“What do you want?”

“For you to tell me why Romain is interrogating you.” Jenson smirked. 

“He wasn’t, it’s fine.”

“Mark.”

“Jense, now is really not the best time to get into it.” Mark said, indicating to the microphone around Jenson’s neck. Jenson caught his arms and pulled him just inside a bush that sat on the path down to the creak. In the long grass, Jenson pulled Mark and his microphones from their necks and set them on the ground, a little distance from them. 

“Now shoot.” Jenson encouraged. Mark rolled his eyes, no longer seeing a way out of this conversation. 

“He was trying to find out if there was anything going on between Fernando and me.” Mark said.

“Which there is.” Jenson nodded. Mark scoffed at him, folding his eyes and turning his head away.

“No there isn’t.” Mark said, his voice a little higher than normal. Jenson shot him a knowing look.

“Mark, please. You’re being a little obvious.” Jenson smiled. Mark looked at his feet. 

“I’m not.”

“You are!” Jenson laughed. Mark glared back up at him. “Look, Fernando was all moody in camp until you turned up, he was super sad after his trial against you because he was missing you, he has been inseparable from you and you from him since we’ve all come together and you disappeared for ten minutes yesterday and I know he didn’t fall down a hill.” Jenson said. 

“You getting a bit like Romain, you’re obviously missing Jess-”

“-Mark, you can’t pull the wool over my eyes. This isn’t something that’s just happened, it’s been going on for ages. Just because the other guys are not as close to you in the paddock and they can’t see it doesn’t mean I’m not.” Mark sighed, pulling at a blade of grass. This was supposed to be a secret. 

“Are we really that obvious?” Mark whispered in fear that someone might overhear his admission to Jenson. Jenson just smiled, happy that finally one of them had admitted it. It was about time. 

“No, Mark. I’m just very close to the two of you.”

“But Romain…”

“He seeing it because we are in a confined space, stuck with each other all day and you two can’t keep away from each other.” There was a pause where Mark considered what Jenson said. 

“But I don’t want to keep away from him…” Mark sighed. Jenson gave him a breathy laugh.

“I think if you did you would confuse both him and everyone else.” Jenson smiled. 

“Then what do I do?”

“Talk to him. Tell him you both need to cool off a little or accept that people are going to question what’s going on between you two.” Mark nodded as Jenson clasped his shoulder again. Mark considered both of Jenson’s options. He could try and hold back with Fernando, which seemed like the one of the most difficult things to try and do, or he could run the risk of everyone, including the public, finding out. And that wasn’t fair on Fernando. Mark sighed as Jenson handed him back his microphone.

“Why did you take these off?” Mark said as he took it from Jenson’s hands. Jenson pulled his own back over his head. 

“Didn’t think you’d appreciate the public hearing that conversation.” Jenson smiled as Mark pulled on his own and they both got to their feet. They walked back to camp quietly, and upon arrival Mark saw Fernando moving around his bed. Jenson clapped him on the shoulder before heading off the other way around camp to his own bed. Mark crossed to Fernando. 

“What are you doing awake?” Mark said, folding his arms and smiling at Fernando as the Spaniard threw Mark’s sleeping bag off his bed, holding it in his hand. “You think I’d be hiding under there?” Fernando blushed as he put the sleeping bag back and turned to Mark. 

“Did not know where you had gone.” Fernando sighed as Mark moved closer to him. Mark resisted the urge to wrap his arms around Fernando; they had to be subtler. Fernando frowned when Mark stopped getting closer. He took a step towards the Australian but Mark held him back with a grip on his shoulder. Fernando’s stomach dropped. “Did I do something wrong?” Mark couldn’t help but smile at Fernando. Fernando became more confused. 

“No, mate, you didn’t do anything.” Mark smiled. Fernando relaxed a bit and as Mark dropped his hand he moved closer to him. 

“I hear Romain asking questions.” Fernando started, resting his chin on Mark’s torso. Mark smiled down at him. “Then it all went quiet and when I looked up no one was at the fire anymore. I thought maybe you had gone back to bed but it was empty. Then you came back.”

“Right. Yeah, that’s what I want to talk about actually.” Mark said as he entwined his and Fernando’s fingers. Fernando lent back a bit off him.

“Oh yes?”

“Yeah. We need to be careful, mate. People are asking questions, noticing things…”

“Was your idea to be in the wood ten minutes to-”

“-I know, Fernando. I’m not saying we have to stop, I’m saying we have to be careful.” Mark said, resting his forehead on Fernando’s. Mark felt confident they were far enough from the fire to not be caught in too much light. He felt safe the cameras couldn’t see them. 

“Ok.” Fernando smiled, sending warm breath across Mark’s face. “No more ten-minute hikes.” He joked. Mark emulated his smile. 

“Exactly.”

“But in the dark… We cannot be seen?” Fernando whispered, bringing one of his hands to the back of Mark’s neck. 

“Not right now, no.” Mark sighed, his body relaxing as Fernando toyed with the hair at the nape of his neck. Fernando brought their lips together for a quick kiss before breaking out of Mark’s hold and sauntering over to his bed. Mark blinked before he realised Fernando had actually gone. He turned to see his silhouette disappearing into his hammock. Mark smiled at him. “Tease.” Mark smirked, climbing back into bed. He saw the outline of Fernando’s head appear at the end of his. 

“Just leaving you wanting more.” Fernando smiled teasingly. Mark sat up and stole a quick kiss before laying back. 

“Goodnight, Fernando.”

“More like good morning.” Fernando commented, settling back down in his hammock. 

“Just get some rest, mate.” Mark smiled up at the stars. 

“Goodnight, Mark.” Fernando muttered back. Mark closed his eyes with a smile on his face. From across camp, Romain couldn’t be sure of what he had seen. It was still dark and Fernando and Mark had been talking quietly. But he was sure he had seen the shapes he could make out as them moved very close. He was sure. And he was sure Mark and Jenson had lied to him. There was something there. Romain’s determination to discover them tripled as he turned his head away from them, setting a plan in his head. 

\- - -

“Nico, why do you do that?” Lewis asked as Nico finally emerged from his sleeping back with his jacket hood pulled tight around his face and his bag over one shoulder. Nico stopped walking as everyone, who had congregated around the fire, watched him with his covered torso but very exposed legs. 

“Hell, let him do it,” Jenson started, turning back to the fire. “Gives us something to laugh about in the morning. I’m not complaining.” Lewis shot his ex-teammate a dubious look as Nico smirked. Lewis really didn’t like how close they were now. He hated the fact that the red team had picked Nico rather than him on the very first day in the jungle. It sucked and now Jenson and Nico were all smiles and inside jokes? Lewis folded his arms, frowning as Nico waltzed down to the creak deliberately, in Lewis’ opinion, wiggling his arse. Jenson watched him go before turning back to the fire and Lewis huffed. 

“Feeling a little jealous?” Someone purred quietly in Lewis’ ear. He turned to see Kimi smirking slightly with his eyes covered by his sunglasses. Lewis turned away again. 

“Not at all.” Lewis lied.

“You should tell him the real reason you left McLaren…” Kimi mused, moving back over to Seb. Lewis caught his arm. 

“He already knows because you told him.” Lewis snarled quietly. From across the fire, Mark was watching their little exchange with a small frown. Kimi smirked more at Lewis. 

“I never told him that, I told you that was why I thought you were… Thank you for confirming.” Lewis let go of Kimi and he finished moving back over to Seb, who held his breakfast out to him as he sat down. Lewis took his harshly from Jenson before stalking over to his bed and sitting on it with his back to camp. Jenson frowned at him. He looked to Kimi who was now talking with Seb before his eyes fell back on his fellow Brit. Once he was finished serving breakfast in tins and Sergio had handed them around, he took his own and moved over to Lewis. 

“What did you say to him?” Seb asked Kimi curiously as he ate a spoonful of food and turned over his shoulder to look at Lewis. When Kimi didn’t reply Seb turned back to face him. 

“You’ve got dirt on your cheek.” Kimi smirked at Seb. Seb frowned. 

“He’s in a huff because you told him he’s got dirt on his cheek?”

“Not Lewis, you.” Kimi said. He licked his thumb and before Seb could say anything Kimi gently rubbed it across his cheek. The dusting of mud came away and was replaced by a brilliant streak of red as Seb blushed. Kimi smiled as he returned to his breakfast, making Seb completely forget his original question. From across camp, Mark’s mouth had fallen open slightly. His eyes slid from Seb and Kimi to Jenson and Lewis so fast he started to feel dizzy. He closed his eyes; taking in everything he had seen, before opening them and looking at Fernando who was sat next to him clearly trying to persuade his body to eat the rice and beans. Fernando looked at him with the spoon halfway to his mouth. 

“What?” Fernando asked sceptically, slowly lowering the spoon back into his tin. Mark shook his head, closing his mouth as his cheeks split into a smile. 

“Nothing.” Mark turned back to Seb and Kimi who were both innocently eating. Fernando touched his shoulder, making him turn back to the Spaniard. 

“Is not nothing. What is it?” Fernando asked softly. Mark lent close to his ear. 

“It appears we are not the only ones hiding something…” Mark muttered. Fernando’s eyes fell on Nico as he reappeared into camp and caught the pure look of hatred he shot Lewis, who was conversing quietly and closely with Jenson. He looked back to Mark.

“What… You think Jenson and-?”

“-Yeah. Love how he’s telling us to be subtle…” Mark added sarcastically, leaning away from Fernando and eating his food. His eyes were drawn back to Kimi and Seb. Fernando frowned at Mark’s last comment. If anything Jenson was being subtle, it was Nico who was looking jealous and pouty. The German crossed over to the fire and picked up his breakfast that was sitting by the embers before falling into a seat next to Romain and attacking his food harshly. Fernando didn’t understand what Mark was referencing, but catching Romain’s eyes on him he restarted his inner persuasion to eat something. 

Sergio’s eyes had locked on Nico’s bag. It was in reaching distance to him now. He could pick it up. It was that close. The burning temptation shot through his fingers and he dropped his spoon loudly in his tray. Everyone looked over at him and he blushed, looking at his feet. Jenson and Lewis crossed back to the fire and took a seat next to each other opposite Nico. Nico huffed, bringing everyone’s attention from Sergio to Nico. Kimi just smirked. 

“What’s the matter, Nico? Couldn’t get your hair glued in the right place this morning?” Lewis shot from across camp, folding his arms and glaring at Nico. Nico turned to him, his eyes narrowing slightly. 

“Just sick of pathetic people, Lewis.” Nico shot back. 

“Lewis, I said leave it.” Jenson muttered to Lewis but Lewis ignored him. 

“So sick of yourself?” Lewis aimed at Nico. Mark and Fernando exchanged a look of confusion. Fernando could understand why Nico was being harsh if he was jealous of Lewis being so close to Jenson, but not Lewis, but as Mark thought it was Lewis and Jenson in the secret relationship, he couldn’t understand Nico’s tone. 

“Sick of people putting on the water works to try and get sympathy.” Nico spat, digging his spoon into his breakfast. 

“Water works? Didn’t realise you’ve been crying, Nico.”

“I’m talking about you.”

“Me? I haven’t been crying.”

“Fine, then whining and sulking off so someone comes over and comforts you…” Nico’s eyes fell on Jenson briefly before he turned back to his food, glaring at it. “It’s pathetic.” Lewis got to his feet.

“You’re pathetic, man! I’m not the one hiding in a jacket until I’ve done my hair! And how are you even getting it to stay? You’ve got no products with you!” Lewis yelled, pointing to Nico’s hair that looked like a hair stylist had done it. Nico got up too. 

“It’s none of your business how I do my hair, Lewis.”

“It is when you’re being so secretive!”

“I’m not being secretive.”

“You are! Why can’t you just-?”

“-Why don’t you just stay away from me.” Nico seethed.

“Gladly!” Lewis shot back. Nico swung his bag on his back and moved over to his bed. “You’re such a hypocrite, Nico! You call me pathetic for sulking off to my bed when it’s exactly what you’re doing now!” Nico dropped his bag down and turned back to Lewis. 

“I’m not doing it for attention. I want to be on my own, that’s why I’ve come away. I don’t need someone coaxing me back to the fire!” Nico spat venomously as he fell onto his bed and continued to eat his breakfast. Lewis exasperated as he sat back down, taking his food from Jenson. Nobody knew what to say. Everyone remained quiet. Looking at everyone else. Waiting for something to break the tension and silence that had surrounded them. 

“Well, this is awkward.” Kimi smirked, dragging the last of his food from the bottom of his tray. Seb couldn’t help but emulate his smirk. Lewis shot daggers at them both. 

“I don’t appreciate being laughed at.” Lewis spat. 

“Lighten up, Lewis.” Jenson said, patting his shoulder and returning to his food. Lewis glared at him. 

“I will not ‘lighten up’.” Lewis spat. He looked around at everyone else but they all seemed to be forcing away smirks or laughter. Lewis gritted his teeth. “Fuck you.” He spat, getting back to his feet and moving to his bed. Everyone watched him go, again, not knowing how to react. This time Felipe broke the silence. 

“At least we know now it’s not me who brings it out in him.” Felipe said in a satisfied tone, popping his full spoon back in his mouth. No one could disagree with him, and Seb found himself coughing out a laugh which was not helped when Kimi patted his back and turned to him, taking the opportunity to pass the German his own smirk. Ahh, the fun they had… 

\- - -

No. Fucking. Way. No. Not happening. Why? What had he done? He hadn’t done anything! Nico shot a glare at Lewis as they waited to find out which of the two of them would be doing the trial. Nico couldn’t understand how it could possible be him. He hadn’t done anything wrong! It had to be Lewis. Lewis had been arguing with Felipe and now him and pretty much everybody. It was going to be Lewis. Nico didn’t want to take part in Hang Glider of Hell. It sounded stupid. Probably suspended in mid air with bugs all over you. No. That was not how Nico wanted to spend his afternoon. He looked up at the presenters. 

“The public have decided that the driver they want to see take part in Hang Glider of Hell is…” The shorter of the two said. Nico couldn’t remember their names. Dan and Alex? Maybe… He didn’t care. He just wanted them to say Lewis’ name and then he could be smug. Maybe the public had really thought he wanted to do a trial from yesterday? No… No his fans wouldn’t do this to him… And he was much more popular than Lewis… Right? No, it wouldn’t be him. It would-

“Nico.” Ant said, looking up from his card to look at Nico. Nico had frozen. Lewis sat back, smiling a little. Good. Nico deserves to have to get his hands dirty. Fernando sighed. Maybe they were not going to get a lot of food tonight. It was a shame because he was getting used to it. He should probably have more faith in Nico but he couldn’t bring it up in him. His eyes found his bag where he had the leaf-crisps tucked away safely. “So we will see you in the Bush tucker clearing later, Nico.” Dec smiled as he and Ant departed from the camp without another word. Most people turned to Nico. 

“It will be fine.” Romain started. 

“You’ll do great.” Sergio added. 

“It’s not that hard.” Seb said, sitting forwards. 

“Just close your eyes and pretend their not there.” Jenson gave a small smile as he placed a hand on Nico’s shoulder. 

“Get as many as you can.” Felipe nodded encouragingly. 

“Just get at least one and we’ll be happy.” Mark smiled, trying to take the pressure off Nico who still hadn’t moved.

“Just don’t call to get out and then you will know you did the best you could.” Fernando encouraged.

“Or he’ll crash and burn.” Lewis shot from opposite Nico. Nico’s eyes fell on him and he closed his mouth.

“How is this helpful?” Felipe shot at Lewis. Lewis didn’t look at him.

“I’m not trying to be helpful.” Lewis still sounded extremely satisfied and Jenson was sure he was joyful at the fact Nico had to do the challenge.

“If you’re just going to be bitter then do something useful and go and wash up.” Jenson spat back at Lewis, moving to sit next to Nico. Lewis watched him go with a confused expression.

“I was trying to make a joke.” Lewis muttered as everyone in camp, including Kimi, turned away from him and brought their attention to Nico. Nico. Lewis glared at him.

“Wasn’t funny.” Jenson sent back, wrapping his arms round Nico. Lewis threw himself up and nosily collected the ten dishes before stomping down to the creak. Fernando and Seb watched him go. “You’ll be fine, Nico.” Jenson muttered in Nico’s ear, rubbing his back soothingly. Nico nodded and pulled him closer. 

“Thank you.” He muttered, just above a whisper. Mark got up. 

“I’m sure there is something more productive we can all be doing than staring at Nico. Jenson’s got it under control.” Mark announced to his fellow campmates and they all got up, moving around the camp to do their own thing – Sergio and Romain went down to the dunny to clear it out. Mark patted Jenson’s shoulder before moving over to his bag and getting out his dirty clothes. Felipe, Fernando and Mark all moved through camp to wash their clothes. Kimi and Seb fell into a muttered conversation seated on Kimi’s bed. 

“Who do you reckon it will be tomorrow?” Felipe asked Mark and Fernando as they washed their shirts. Fernando shrugged. 

“Could be anyone.” Mark commented, putting soap into the bucket of water. 

“I believe it will be Lewis.” Felipe said, handing Mark his clothes as Fernando passed him wet stuff to hang on the branch they had fashioned into a washing line. 

“Could be anyone.” Mark repeated. 

“Would not mind doing one…” Fernando mused.

“Mmm…” Mark mumbled, holding back his true opinion of the Bush Tuckers. After having to eat turkey’s testicles he would not be bothered if he never had to do another trial again. 

“Have to do one and beat Seb.” Fernando added, looking over at Mark.

“You might change your mind if you get put to do one.” Mark said. 

“For sure, it could be bad but it could also be fun.” Felipe said, taking more wet clothes from Fernando. 

“Unless you have to eat something.” Mark murmured to himself, feelingly slightly nauseous at the memory of his trial. 

The morning passed quickly. Some people were relaxing in the sun; others were playing with Sergio’s leaf cards. Nico sat by the fire hugging his knees to his body as he watched Jenson more around the flames, keeping them going. Lewis was avoiding Nico by staying down by the creak all morning. A few people had gone down to try and get him to come back into camp but he blatantly refused. He didn’t want to see Nico drape himself all over Jenson and unless the Brit was going to come down and get him he wasn’t going anywhere. That’s what Lewis told Mark when the Australian told him to stop being a baby. No one else had come after that. Lewis was in a worse mood than ever when he heard everyone calling good luck to Nico. When he was sure the German would have vacated the vicinity he moved his way back up to camp. He immediately noticed the absence of Jenson and Seb. Of course Jenson had gone. Lewis frowned angrily as he fell onto his bed, huffing. Sergio exchanged a look with Fernando before Fernando carried on showing Sergio a card trick with his leaves. When Jenson and Seb returned, however, the Brit walked deliberately straight passed Lewis and joined Sergio in watching Fernando emulate card tricks with leaves. 

\- - -

In. Out. In. Out. In. Out. 

“This could be a lot worse.” Nico muttered to himself as he walked down the pathway towards the trial area he had been directed to. It appeared there was more than one trial area in this place. Nico was trying to remain calm. He wasn’t going to get himself in a panic because if he did then he would surely fail to get any meals for camp tonight. He didn’t want to be the reason behind everyone’s bitching. 

In. Out. In. Out. In. Out 

He was focusing on his breathing to keep himself calm. Not thinking about the prospect of being covered in bugs shortly. Hang Glider of Hell. Surely he would be held high in the air somewhere. That was OK. He could do heights. Just not confined spaces where he couldn’t move. This was going to be OK. He was going to be able to do this. At least five. He wanted to get at least five meals for tonight. Five or more and he would be happy. He needed to prove to the public, Lewis and himself that he could do this. He was a Formula One driver for fuck sake! He wasn’t going to let a few bugs make him out to be a wimp. He was a little miffed the producers wouldn’t let him bring his bag with him. It was reluctantly buried in his sleeping bag. He had tried to hide it when no one was looking so they would think he had it with him. He didn’t know how successful he had been.

Upon arriving in the trial area he could already see the trial. He was standing beneath it. A transparent box about the length of a bed attached to what looked like a zip wire with hang glider wings stuck to the top for effect. There was a black box on top of the clear one that Nico couldn’t see into. That will contain the bugs then Nico thought as he shivered slightly. He finished walking over to the presenters (whose names Jenson had reminded him of) and shook their hands before folding his arms and looking up at the hang glider thing. Ant and Dec exchanged a smirk.

“So, Nico, are you looking forward to the trial?” Dec asked with a smile on his face. Nico dropped his eyes to the presenters and blushed slightly, a smile pulling onto his face. “You really look like you are.” Dec teased. 

“I’m ready to win some meal for camp.” Nico returned. 

“So, why do you think the public have chosen you today?” Ant asked, resting is elbow on his hand and holding his chin. Nico shrugged.

“I don’t know, maybe they think I’m nervous around bugs? Thought it would be funny? Thought I wanted to? You’ll have to ask them.” Nico’s smile wavered as his eyes fell back onto the suspended box in mid air. Dec took it as his que to explain the rules. 

“As you know, todays trial is called Hang Glider of Hell.” Dec started. 

“You will be put in the jungle hang glider,” Ant continued, pointing up to the box above their heads. “And flown through the jungle.”

“As you fly, you will see four-digit numbers on the ground which you must enter into the padlocks at the bottom of the box.”

“There are ten stars locked into the base of the box and ten codes to be seen.”

“You will have to try out the codes into each padlock to find the corresponding lock to the code.”

“Ten stars up for grabs, meaning ten meals available.”

“So you will have ten minutes to complete this trial.”

“However, this is a bush tucker trial so it is highly likely you will not be alone in there.”

“If you want to stop the trial at any point just say ‘I’m a celebrity get me out of here’; the trial will stop and we will get you out as quickly as possible.”

“If you do stop the trial before the ten minutes has passed then you will forfeit any stars you have already collected.”

“How does all that sound?” Dec concluded, looking to Nico. The German did look a little pale and was staring pointedly up at the hang glider. Slowly, and after swallowing nervously, he nodded. 

“Let’s do it.” Nico muttered in a soft voice. 

“Alright, let’s get you in position.” Ant smiled and the rangers led Nico off camera to put on a harness.

\- - -

Sergio couldn’t take his eyes off of it. He was trying. Trying so hard not to think about. Trying to distract himself. It wasn’t working. He found himself staring at it. He shook his head and turned back to the fire, poking it a little harshly and sending one of the burning logs out of placement. It didn’t affect things too much; it was just annoying.

He had already been round camp and asked everyone if they needed something doing: laundry? Washing up? Clearing out the dunny? No one needed anything and just thanked him politely. So he was sitting by the fire… Staring at it. He looked around to see if he could find someone to distract him. Everyone seemed to be in their own world though. Jenson had disappeared with Fernando and Mark to get more fire wood, with Jenson blatantly ignoring Lewis’ offer to help and Mark and Fernando not being able to be separate for more than three seconds. Maybe Romain was right, maybe there was something odd about that. Though, Sergio knew Mark and Fernando were close in the paddock… Maybe they were just staying really close because they reminded each other of home and it was comforting. Sergio was still sure Romain was over reacting about it. 

With the three of them gone off in the jungle, that left Romain, Felipe, Seb, Kimi and Lewis in camp and in no way in need of company. Romain and Felipe were heading down to the creak in swimming stuff, Kimi and Seb were talking in muttered voices sitting on Kimi’s bed and Lewis was lying on the log bench opposite Sergio with his hat over his face. Nope. No one needed Sergio to talk to them, so Sergio was staring at Nico’s bag, finally left unattended badly hidden in his bed. 

What the hell is in there?

It was like Sergio had an itch on his arm that he couldn’t reach. Constantly niggling at him however much he didn’t think about it. And now he had found a way to scratch that itch. But it didn’t feel right. It was like an invasion of privacy. Whatever Nico had in there he wasn’t sharing with the rest of camp for a reason. So maybe it was just something personal. Maybe it was a stone he found that was shaped in a way to remind him of home…. That would explain the thud…

Or maybe it’s something he shouldn’t have.

Sergio really hated his brain for giving him that; now he was even more intrigued to know. And now it wasn’t just for personal gain, to set his mind at ease. No, now he could justify it as a need-to-know for the rest of the camp. Is it really possible that Nico could have smuggled something into the jungle that he shouldn’t have? Surely not… But he did always look camera ready after his mystery morning disappearances to the creak… And without fail he always took his bag… Maybe the ‘don’t look at me’ act was a rouse so people wouldn’t see just how much he changed from sleep to being washed and clean. Sleeping in the jungle could make a person look ragged and so a nice morning dip in the creak always freshened you up… But to what extent? Sergio couldn’t-

“-I know what you’re thinking.” Sergio’s head snapped towards Lewis who had sat up, hat back on his head normally and leaning forwards with his elbows resting on his knees. Sergio blushed at being caught out. 

“You don’t. Am not thinking about anything in particular… Lots of different things…” Sergio lied poorly, focusing back on the fire. Lewis smirked at him and let out a breathy laugh. 

“You want to know what he’s hiding.” Lewis purred teasingly as he moved round the fire to sit next to Sergio. Sergio’s head turned involuntarily towards Nico’s bag at Lewis’ words. Lewis smirked again, taking a seat on Sergio’s right (Nico’s bag being on Sergio’s left). Sergio forced himself to look away. 

“Do not…” Sergio muttered. Without another word, Lewis got up and crossed to Nico’s bed, picked up his bag and returned to Sergio, placing it on the floor between them. Sergio looked bemused from Lewis to the bag and back again. It was too close now… Way too tempting. “Why did you…?”

“You want to know what’s in it. I want to know what’s in it. He’s not here. God knows if we’ll get another chance.” Lewis still didn’t open the bag, he just watched Sergio whose eyes were glued to it. 

“We can’t…” Sergio’s voice came out at just over a whisper. Lewis bent down until he caught Sergio’s eye.

“We have to.” Lewis said straightening up. Sergio looked back to the fire, turning the stick he was holding in his hands nervously. 

“It might be private…”

“More likely banned if it’s Nico.” Lewis threw in as a side comment. Sergio turned back to him.

“What?”

“Look, I’ll open it. Everyone hates me now anyway because I snapped at Princess Britney on his big trial day so it doesn’t matter. Just say I sat here and opened it and you happened to see. You’re not involved, alright man?” Lewis said, moving the bag in between his legs and gripping the zip. Sergio gave a fleeting look around camp but no one was here. Seb and Kimi were… Were not where they were a minute ago. Sergio looked around for them but he couldn’t see them. Weird. He swore they were just-

“-Sergio?” Lewis said, bringing him back to the matter at hand. Sergio knew they were pushed for time before the others came back. Now or never. What did it matter, just one quick look? No one needed to know. Just Lewis and him. And it would put the irksome itch to rest. No one else needed to know. Just one little peak. And they were just checking for the good of the camp. Yeah. Nothing personal. It was a need-to-know basis. Without pondering it anymore, Sergio nodded his head and Lewis unzipped the bag. 

\- - -

Nico had a stupid helmet on with a stupid harness that felt a little too tight laying in a stupid box with stupid padlocks and stupid stars locked to them. This was so stupid. Why did he of all people have to be doing this? He didn’t want to be. He wanted to be lying in the sun with Jenson laughing about something ridiculous. That would be nice… No, Nico. You have to focus. Nico adjusted himself a little at the black safety chord that was attached to the small of his back and ran out of the top of the box restricted him. Stupid safety chord. Why did he have to have it anyway? It wasn’t like he could fall out of the box – which, luckily, was not air tight and he could still move quite a lot, even if he was restricted to be lying on his stomach, so he wasn’t feeling too badly claustrophobic. This was all really stupid. 

“OK, Nico, on the sound of the klaxon you’re ten minutes will start and you will move forwards.” Ant or Dec’s (Nico was sure Jenson had said the shorter one was Dec, but without seeing them and having panic rushing through him he couldn’t tell there voices apart) voice sounded into the plastic voice he was lying in. Nico nodded, bracing himself for a quick descent. He wanted to have his feet back on the ground. He wanted to be standing. Just ten minutes, Nico, you can do this. There was no way he was calling to get out of this thing before the time eluded. Seb got seven stars yesterday, so why couldn’t he? Because when and if they drop bugs on you you’re going to scream like a ten-year-old girl… “Am not.” Nico challenged himself. 

“Best of luck, Nico!” The other presenter’s voice (who he was putting down to be Ant; something in his voice sounded… Taller?) sounded and suddenly the klaxon was sounded and the trail had begun. Now, when Nico was told he was going to be flying, he thought it meant quickly. He wasn’t moving quickly at all. A very slow pace began and initially he thought it was broken. But then the first four codes came into view on huge yellow cards on the ground below him and he realised he was moving slowly so he had time to get all four. The first four codes he could see were: 2013, 2004, 1982 and 1976. Nico smiled at the 1982 code, making him feel a warm sense of home. The four-digit number always reminded him of his Dad. He started with that one, realising quickly that they were all probably going to be significant Formula One years. “Which one are you trying first?” Who he assumed was Ant asked through the speaker somewhere in the box.

“1982.” Nico said back, moving to the first lock on his left. There were three on the left, three on the right and four on the front of the box. 

“Any particular reason?” The other voice, whom he was assuming was Dec, called. Nico got the hint that they wanted him to keep talking.

“The year my father won the World Championship.” Nico said, spinning the numbers on the padlock. One. Nine. Eight. Two. To his monumentious relief, the lock sprung open and released the star. Nico couldn’t help but smile. Thanks, Dad. He thought, grinning stupidly as he picked up the star. One meal. Good start. “I got one!”

“Excellent, get that put in your bag and move onto the next one.” Ant called and Nico rolled onto his right slightly, lifting his body enough to put the star into the bag. Lying back down, his eyes fell back to the codes below him.

“Alright, let’s give 1976 a go, shall we.” Nico said calmly, moving to the next padlock in the line. This was easy. Simple even. He was calm and relaxed and kind of enjoying himself. “Because I think Niki would be pissed if I forgot about him at this point. Challenging year, 1976… Amazing to see Niki coming back after his huge accident…” Nico began to ramble as he tried out the next three padlocks. Finally, one sprung open and released it’s star. Two meals. He put it in his bag. 

“Eight minutes left, Nico.” Dec called. Nico had totally forgotten about the time limit. More codes were coming into view now and Nico sense a feeling of urgency. He had to get his finger out. 

“2004 next. The year Michael Schumacher gets his seventh World Championship.” Nico said a little faster as he frantically spun the numbers on the padlocks. “I enjoyed racing with him last year. That was fun... Shit, you bastard.”

“What’s that?” Ant asked, the smile clear in his voice. 

“I thought it had opened and it didn’t.” Nico said before moving to the next padlock. This started to seem relentless and Nico was too aware of how time must be slipping from his fingers. Two. Zero. Zero. Four. Pull at the lock. No. Next one. Two. Zero. Zero. Four. Pull at the lock. No. Next one. Two. Zero. Zero. Four. Pull at the lock… Pull at the lock. Yes! Another star free. Nico pushed it into his bag as three more codes came into view: 1950, 2006, 2007. Nico started pushing the last two numbers on the locks he had tried with 2004 to one and three. It didn’t take long. The second lock he tried sprung open happily. Four stars. 

“That was 2013 for our darling Sebastian for winning his fourth consecutive title, now I’m going to move on to 2006 for our mysterious Fernando Alonso and his two consecutive World Championship.” Nico announced as he worked around the locks putting in two-zero-zero-six. He had tried three of the remaining locks when Ant’s voice filtered into the box. 

“Four minutes gone, six left.” The presenter said to cheerily. His cheery tone worried Nico momentarily until he was distracted by yanking at a lock because he was sure it had opened. It hadn’t. 

“Fucking hell, Fernando. Where are you?” Nico frowned as he stopped and looked for the locks he hadn’t tried yet. He took a risk and went straight for the last one. To his relief, it sprung open. Five stars. He had reached his target. The fact made him smile and he lost himself slightly, forgetting the fact he was on national television in the middle of a bush tucker trial. 

“Oooh, sometimes, I get a good feeling… yeah.” Nico began to sing the chorus of ‘Good Feeling’ by Flo Rida, tapping his feet and bobbing slightly as he tried 2007 in the locks – it was easy because he only had to change one number on the ones he had already tried. “I get a feeling that I’ve never, never, never had before… but it’s a good feeling…” He continued to sing much to the amusement of the presenters. He wasn’t extremely good at singing which made it more hilarious. He then changed the lyrics to match what he was doing. “Oooh, Kimi, I got Kimi’s number… yeah. Two-thousand and seven is when he won the World Championship oh yeah, it’s Kimi’s number…” 

“Five minutes left, Nico.” Dec breathes, tears of laughter running down his cheek, as Nico put the fifth star in his bag. Nico took a quick glance over to where the presenters were to see them in stitches and blushed rapidly, clamping his mouth shut. The last three codes had come into view: 2008, 2009, 1994. He started with the codes beginning 200 because that was what was already in most of the locks. Just as he moved to change the seven to a nine on the first lock something smacked against his legs. It continued to spread along his body and he turned his head over his shoulder to see what it was. He wished he hadn’t. Crawling along his legs and up his back towards his head were millions and millions of cockroaches. Ok, so maybe millions was an over exaggeration, but Nico couldn’t take his eyes off them. He hated it. He wanted them off of him now. He had been fine just putting in the codes and making a prat of himself, but now… It had turned into his worst nightmare. A small squeak escaped his lips. 

“I bet he calls to get out.” Ant muttered to Dec, moving his microphone away from him so he couldn’t be heard. 

“He doesn’t look comfortable…” Dec mused, mirroring Ant’s action. “But he’s a Formula One driver, those guys are made of steal.”

“Fiver?” Ant offered, holding out his hand. Dec considered it for a moment before taking it with a smile on his face.

“Done.”

“That’s ten thousand cockroaches in there with you now, Nico.” Ant called with a smirk on his face as Dec looks at him ludicrously. “Four minutes remaining!”

Ok, Nico, you can do this. In. Out. In. Out. Face your fears time. In. Out. In. Out. You’ve turned away from them now, so that’s good. In. Out. In. Out. Just… Pretend they’re not there. Nico started to panic as a bunch of them circled his hands and crawled around the locks. He closed his eyes feeling sick. How’s he supposed to do this now? He was doing so well! He had had five minutes left with four stars to go! He was doing so well… Now he could barely move. Alright now, don’t panic. They can’t hurt you… Remember what Jenson said? They just crawl around a lot. In. Out. In. Out. Nico suddenly opened his eyes. Jenson. He thought of what Jenson would say if he were here right now. How he would laugh at his stupidity and call him Britney or Princess. Nico blushed slightly at the thought. And 2009 was Jenson’s number. He thought about his campmates… How they would react…

“Thought you’d do a bit better than that, Britney…”

“Being too much of a Princess again… I bet he called to get out…” 

“They dropped some cockroaches on you and you couldn’t move?”

The first two voices he couldn’t place; they were just disappointed tones. Lewis’ voice was third and first to break into his head, clearest with his British voice teasing… Laughing... It hurt. Made a sort of determination burn through him. He wanted to prove Lewis wrong, prove to him he didn’t crash and burn. He had to do this. It was a necessity. If he didn’t everyone would be hungry and it would be his fault. No, he couldn’t let that happen… But he still couldn’t move.

“You alright, Nico?” Dec called, slightly desperately; he didn’t want to lose the bet. Nico concentrated on Jenson, his voice, his face, focusing on what he would say, how he would support him.

Because, you know, Nico, you make it look easy and they probably won’t pick you again…

Nico wasn’t making that up. He was remembering it. It was one of he many things Jenson had said to him that morning to make him relax, feel better. Make it look easy. With Jenson’s smiling face burning in his minds eye and the sound of his encouraging voice replacing Nico’s in his head made him reach forwards and turn the numbers on the locks again. He gritted his teeth as cockroaches crawled over his hands and across his face. Come on you fucker… Where are you… Just unlock… Relief washed through Nico as the 2009 code let a star fall loosely against the side of the box. He shoved it into his bag before returning back to the locks. 

“Three minutes left.” Dec called with a relieved smile. 

“Which code was that, Nico?” Ant asked. Nico smiled a little. 

“2009, Jenson’s year… It was… Jenson… The year Jenson won…” Nico couldn’t stop himself saying Jenson’s name. It was corrupting his head, making everything so much easier. You’re doing so well, Nico. Jenson’s voice purred in his ear. I’m so proud of you. Nico began clicking the nines to eights on the locks as he let Jenson’s voice wash over him. He was a little shocked at how much attention he had paid to the freckly-Brit’s voice. Or the attention to his freckles… Or his lips… As Nico freed the next star he imagined Jenson lying on his back with his arms wrapped around him. Nico smiled at the fantasy. “Not bad for a Princess, Britney.” Jenson cooed before pressing his lips to Nico’s neck and making him squirm pleasantly… 

Wait… What?

“Two minutes left.” Someone said, though it sounded as if they were in a tunnel calling through to Nico. He shook his head, pulling himself back to the matter at hand. He went for 1994. Sad year. He began spinning the numbers, trying to keep focus on what he was doing. But he couldn’t. The only way he could get through working around the cockroaches without screaming his head off was to think about Jenson, but thinking about Jenson lead him straight back to that fantasy and his hips were pressed into the bottom on the transparent box. He couldn’t risk. 

He opened his mouth to call to get out, knowing he wasn’t going to be able to do anymore. But then he remembered that by doing that he would forfeit all the stars he collected. All that hard work and daunting realisations for nothing…

“Thought you’d do a bit better than that, Britney…”

“Being too much of a Princess again… I bet he called to get out…” 

“They dropped some cockroaches on you and you couldn’t move?”

He gritted his teeth and pushed on. Two codes left, two locks left. He chose to try every code on each lock before moving round. One. Nine. Nine. Four. Pull the lock. No. Give it a bit more of a tug. Still no? No. Last code. One. Nine…. One. Nine… Shit, What’s the end of that code? Something important. Something I probably should remember.

“Half minutes left.” A few cockroaches crawled across his face and he brushed them away with a little scream. Fucking hell, Nico, could you be acting more like a Princess? FOCUS! 19-what? What the hell was the end of that code? Nico couldn’t think. It was like he could hear Jenson taunting in his ear I know but you have to think about me to find out. No! Nico could do this. It was the one before. The one that was just behind him. He turned and looked down over his left shoulder… What was that he could read? Was that a nine? A five? Had he had a five in a code before? He wracked his brain. 1982, 1976, 2004, 2013, 2006, 2007, 2009, 2008. No there wasn’t a five before. There had to be a five in it somewhere but where? He thought about abandoning this lock and opening the other, knowing it was 1994, but as he turned back to his hands to do exactly that a klaxon sounded and before he knew it he was falling. 

He screamed. Just like I’m sure any of you would when one minute you’re lying in a box and the next you’re falling. He grabbed the harness around his arms as he spun in the air, flying towards the big ‘2009’ board. But his breathing settled a little as he bounced back up. The plus side was that most of the cockroaches had been thrown off him in the sudden drop. Nico smiled over to the presenters coyly as he slowly came to a stop. He had done it. He had completed a bush tucker trial. 

“You forgot to mention that bit, huh?” Nico called, feeling much calmer and more like himself than he had done all morning. The presenters smiled at him, leaning on the rail looking out at him.

“Doesn’t say on our cards.” Dec laughed. 

“Liar.” Nico smiled as the rangers pulled him back to the flat ground. He was relieved to be standing again, not covered in cockroaches in a flying plastic tub. Bob came over to double-check him for any more cockroaches and brushed a few off his neck. He said that Nico might find a few more on him so the best thing to do was to go back to camp and go for a swim in the creak. Nico nodded but he knew he was going to do that anyway. Never had he smelt so bad in his life. 

More like himself indeed. 

“So, Nico, how was it?” Ant asked as Nico returned to the viewing area. Nico smiled.

“Fun until about five minutes in.” 

“Yeah, we heard you singing.” Dec commented, looking a little cheerier than Ant. “We can’t have you thinking these trials are fun.”

“Well the last half definitely wasn’t.” Nico sighed in relief as Jenson tried to push his way back to the front of his head. Now really wasn’t the time to be thinking about that. 

“Ok then, let’s see how well you did.” Ant said, tucking his hands under his opposite armpits. Nico pushed his hand into the bag and threw the stars one by one onto the floor (Seb had mentioned something about putting them on the floor to them all when he returned yesterday). They made a cheery clatter as they fell together on the ground and Nico smiled ecstatically as he dropped the last one. Eight. Eight meals for camp. There was some solace in the fact he had beaten Seb. 

“Eight stars which means eight meals for camp tonight.” Dec confirmed with a smile. 

“I’m really happy, everyone is going to be so pleased.” Nico smiled, clapping his hands together once. Ant and Dec smiled. 

“Well congratulations, Nico. We’ll let you head back to camp and tell them the good news.” Ant said and Nico nodded, waving goodbye and picking up his water bottle. 

“Yeah, it was fun to begin with. I got the hang of it quickly; it wasn’t very complex. It got to a point where I forgot it was a bush tucker and would have been happy up there all day opening the locks. I wasn’t ready for the cockroaches to be dropped and they made me jump. I’m not a huge fan of them but I made it work. Everyone is going to be happy with eight stars, a nice big meal. And I’m kind of glad I got more stars than Seb. He set a benchmark and I passed it. Nice to have him not holding a record or winning something for once.” Nico laughed to the interviewer and she thanked him, letting him go back to camp. 

\- - -

Mark and Fernando were on fire duty. Jenson had dragged Lewis off somewhere apparently wanting to ‘clear the air’ before Nico returned. Romain, Felipe, Seb and Kimi were all eating their lunch by the telephone box, discussing something Mark didn’t care to find out about. It was starting to annoy him; being so close to Fernando but not being allowed to be normal with him. Like right now, sitting by the fire. He wanted to have his arm around his shoulder and feel Fernando relax into his body and entwine their fingers together and brush delicate kisses on the side of his face like they had been just over a week ago at Mark’s parent’s house. But no. They had to sit like they were bored and waiting for their baggage to arrive at and airport terminal. 

Fernando was finding it hard too. After Mark’s ‘be careful’ warning Fernando wasn’t sure what they had initially been doing to be so obvious. So he was being too cautious. And he didn’t like the way Mark’s jawline seemed a little more predominant now. Of all of the drivers in the jungle, Mark was the last one who needed to loose any weight. But the lack of food was having it’s effect. Or maybe Fernando was just seeing things… It’s amazing what lack of nutrition and boredom can make you see. 

Lewis and Jenson returned back to the camp with small smiles on their faces. Maybe the air wasn’t completely fogless but it had significantly reduced. The two Brits sat opposite Fernando and Mark, who subtle moved a little away from each other. Jenson smirked at them, causing Fernando to roll his eyes and fold his arms, whereas Lewis frowned. 

“What’s up with you two?” Lewis commented.

“Bored.” Fernando sighed. 

“Are not bored.” Kimi smiled, moving into the fire circle with Seb just behind him. Fernando eyed him suspiciously. 

“What do you mean?” Mark asked, sitting up a little. Kimi sat down on his bed, Seb settling beside him closely… Very closely. Fernando frowned at Seb before his eyes returned to Kimi.

“Making observations.” Kimi said, pushing his sunglasses back onto his face and moving his left arm so it disappeared behind Seb. Fernando followed Kimi’s movements, frowning deeper. No one else seemed to be aware. 

“So you’re assuming we’re not bored even though we’re just sitting here… Looking bored.” Mark passed back to Kimi. Kimi raised an eyebrow at him. Fernando was sure he saw Seb push into Kimi’s side just a little.

“Am I bored?” Kimi sent back. Mark frowned at Fernando, looking for some kind of help. Upon seeing his boyfriend was definitely distracted and not listening he turned back to Kimi. 

“I don’t know. Who can tell anything with you.” Mark shrugged, leaning back into his seat and resting his right hand under his head. Seb caught Fernando’s eye and blushed, moving away that tiny distance he had melted into Kimi. That made Fernando frown deeper. 

“Am not bored.”

“Fantastic.” Mark sighed sarcastically.

“This is how I know you are not bored.” Kimi tried to imply the secret message to Mark but Mark just frowned at him. Fernando, on the other hand, picks it up. “Or maybe you have got bored…” Kimi mused, turning to look up at the trees. Fernando has a feeling – that is correct, although he doesn’t know it – that Kimi is trying to push them to subtly confirming what Kimi is implying. Fernando knew that his initial secret, coded statement was that Seb and he aren’t bored in their relationship together, so Mark and Fernando can’t be. That caught Fernando off guard a little because that meant that Kimi had worked out Mark and he were together and was converting that information at the expense of revealing Seb and he were together. But it irritated Fernando that Kimi pushed that maybe Mark and he were bored of each other. They weren’t bored. They were scared of everyone asking questions so were trying to be subtle. Maybe their subtleness was too little to late. Anyway, Fernando took Kimi’s bait without a second thought. 

“Are not bored. Will never be bored.” Fernando shot across the fire at Kimi, moving back over to Mark a little so their knees brush. No one but Kimi and Seb seemed to notice this. Kimi smiled at Fernando, Mark just frowned up at him. 

“But you said you were bored?” Lewis asked, really confused by everything that has just happened. Fernando looked to him, his mouth going dry. Nico chose this perfect time to return to camp, pulling everyone’s attention from Fernando. The Spaniard sighed in relief and leant back next to Mark, closing his eyes. Mark turned to face him as everyone looked towards the entrance of camp. 

“You going to tell me what that was about?” Mark muttered as Fernando opened his eyes to look at him. Those perfect, hazel orbs that just made him spill every tiny insignificant thought he had ever had. Although this one was a little more significant. 

“Kimi knows. Possibly Seb too.” Fernando sighed, pushing himself to his feet as Nico could be heard singing. Mark got up and grabbed his shoulder, spinning him round and talking in a lowered voice. 

“Knows what?” Mark asked frantically. 

“About us. If it’s any conciliation, he did let me know Seb and him are together.” Fernando said in such a blasé tone Mark had to consider if he was still actually talking to Kimi. Fernando turned away again. Mark spun him back. 

“What!” 

“Will tell you later.” Fernando said with a small smile, moving around the fire to see Nico dancing and singing poorly as he entered camp, swinging his water bottle. Jenson laughed at his ‘Dad dancing’ which made Lewis frown. He still wasn’t happy about his teammate and ex-teammate’s sudden close friendship. It put him on edge. 

“Oooh! Sometimes! I get a good feeling! Yeah! - Ha!” Nico was practically yelling the lyrics with a grin all over his face. He controllably stumbled the rest of the way into camp making sure he had everyone’s attention before he finished his little song, throwing his arms out wide to the sides and shouting up to the sky. “I got a feeling that Rosberg got eight stars! So that means eight meals!” Everyone cheered him and Fernando’s face broke into a pleasantly surprised smile. Eight meals! Everyone congratulated Nico, hugging him and passing words of happiness until they were all around the fire. Jenson was the last to hug him.

“Not bad for a Princess, Britney.” Jenson smirked teasingly in his ear so no one else heard him. Nico felt a pleasant shiver shot through him but pulled away from Jenson a little too quickly, forcing away that image, that feeling he had had in the trial. Jenson frowned at him a little but it soon mostly washed away when Nico smiled at him. 

“Not bad at all.” Nico said happily, turning away from Jenson and taking a seat next to Romain, re-telling what he had to do in the trial. Jenson sat and listened to Nico’s story, trying to wok out what made Nico pull away so abruptly. It was confusing. Nico ended his story by declaring that he had to go for a swim because he stank of “cockroach shit” – a direct quote – and left the others to fantasise about what they might get tonight for dinner. Jenson watched Nico, once he had changed, sauntered down to the creak with just his bright green swimming shorts and boots on and his bag over his shoulder. Nico’s shorts were resting obscenely low on his hips and Jenson couldn’t help but stare at him until he had disappeared. 

Not bad at all.

\- - -

“Kimi?” Seb asked tentatively, fiddling with the corner of the laminate in his hand. It was weird now, knowing Kimi and him felt the same way about each other and trying to find the best time to share secret but intimate touches without anyone seeing. Seb had initially claimed it was impossible but Kimi said “If Fernando and Mark can do it, why can’t we?” Which had made the German gasp and ask for more detail because he knew Mark and Fernando were close, he just didn’t realise they were that close. They still hadn’t kissed yet because that was proving to be near on impossible, which made Seb a little sad because something he had been craving to know for the last six months was what it would feel like to have Kimi’s lips on him. The lips that barely moved when he spoke but could always make Seb feel ten times better. Kimi had promised they would find a way. 

Kimi turned from his conversation with Fernando and Mark, that was being muttered at the back of camp by the telephone box which made Seb feel a little uncomfortable because he wasn’t sure what they had been talking about but the knowing smirk Mark was sending him gave him a pretty good idea, and smiled at him. Seb wanted to believe that Kimi’s face really was lighting up a bit more when he looked at him but he wasn’t sure. Maybe he was just making that up because it was what he wanted to see. Seb blushed a little. 

“Yes?” Kimi asked kindly. Mark and Fernando smirked at each other, noting the tone change of the Finn when he spoke to Seb. Seb still didn’t look up. 

“Um… We’ve got to… Got to go and do this… This dingo thing…” Seb said, passing the laminate to Kimi. Kimi read it and Fernando lent forwards to do the same. Kimi nodded. 

“OK.” The Finn said, getting to his feet, still holding the laminate. He collected his microphone from the log a short distance away and put it back over his head.

“We’ll pick this up later.” Mark smiled, picking up his own microphone and pulling it on. Fernando did the same. Kimi shrugged in agreement. 

“Have fun.” Fernando smiled knowingly at Seb making the German blushed. Kimi led Seb away from them and down camp, over to the entrance. 

“Where are you going?” Nico asked from his sunbathing position on his bed as Kimi and Seb walked past.

“Dingo thingy.” Seb said. Jenson’s eyes snapped from Nico and he smiled at the leaving pair. 

“Good luck!” Jenson called, evoking others to do the same. Lewis waved them off as he returned from the creak with the clean trays from lunch. He sat himself next to Jenson who forced himself not to return to looking at Nico and join in the debate about tyres with Lewis, Romain, Sergio and Felipe. 

As Seb and Kimi disappeared from the sight of camp, Kimi clasped Seb’s hand in his own and pulled him forwards so he was walking next to him rather than following. Kimi didn’t let go of his hand, instead entwining their fingers. 

“Why must you always walk behind me?” Kimi smiled at a blushing Seb. 

“Why must you always wear those sunglasses?” Seb shot back, a smile creeping slowly onto his face. Kimi considered him for a moment before turning to look forwards, his sunglasses shielding his eyes from Seb. 

“Touché.” Kimi muttered, making Seb grin wider. Kimi was enjoying their little stroll through the jungle. It was nice, quiet. He didn’t have people firing questions at him, making him eat parts of animals that should have never gone near his mouth, no one judging him for holding Seb’s hand. It was tranquil. Kimi liked it. Just the sounds of the animals living in the jungle, the soft thud of their boots on the hard path and the echo of his breathing from Seb. All too soon, Seb suddenly pulled out of his hold and jogged to a tree that had a red arrow in front of it, two shovels propped against it and a note pinned to the trunk. Right. Cameras. Kimi sighed and moved over to Seb, wanting to hold his hand again. Seb read the note. 

“Dingo Dollars buried, deep underground,  
Lost and forgotten, waiting to be found,  
Dig to find the arrows that show you where to go,  
Follow their direction to unearth your precious dough.”

Kimi looked down at the red arrow just in front of Seb’s feet. It was pointing diagonally to the left and read: 10 METRES. Kimi looked at Seb, picking up one of the small plastic shovels. Seb copied him, picking up the other. 

“Ok. So we go ten metres this way and dig.” Kimi said, pointing in the direction of the arrow. Seb nodded slowly. 

“But how will we know how far ten metres is?” Seb asked, looking at Kimi as if he had the answer. Kimi looked around him before turning back to Seb and shrugging. Seb sighed. “Great.” 

Seb looked at the arrow, trying to work out if it had a clue on it somewhere or told them of some means to measure the distance. It didn’t. Kimi just lent on the tree, watching him and twirling the shovel in his hand. Neither of them knew what to do. It was aggravating. Romain and Sergio had come back yesterday chatting rapidly about how much fun the Dingo Dollar Challenge had been but this didn’t seem fun at all. Seb was loosing his patience. 

“How tall are you?” Kimi asked out of the blue. Seb looked up at him. 

“What?” Seb snapped. Kimi reacted indifferently. 

“How tall are you? How many centimetres?” Seb frowned at Kimi, trying to work out the relevance of his question. He couldn’t. He sighed in an irritated manner. 

“One-hundred and seventy-six centimetres, why?”

“Would you say this is about twenty-five?” Kimi asked, holding up the shovel. Seb looked at his own. It did appear to be just shorter than a ruler. 

“I suppose.” Seb shrugged, looking back up at Kimi. The Finn gave one sharp nod. 

“We’ve got a two-metre measuring contraption then.” Kimi smiled. Seb still frowned at him as he pointed to the floor. “Lay down with your head on the arrow along the same angle as it.” Kimi requested. Seb didn’t move. 

“Why?”

“Because I’m going to use your height plus the height of the shovel to measure ten metres.” Kimi said calmly. Seb blinked at him. 

“Well, how tall are you?”

“It’s doesn’t matter.”

“It does.”

“No. I’m not laying down because it was my idea.” Kimi smiled teasingly, crouching so he was on the same level as Seb. 

“But we’re about the same height…” Seb tried, his voice fading at the close proximity to Kimi. Kimi lent forwards so his lips were next to Seb’s ear, sending warm breath down his neck. 

“Get on your back.” Kimi whispered in a protective, soft voice, making Seb want to do exactly what he was asked to. He laid down, feeling the bump of the arrow on the back of his head and looked up to Kimi as he stood. “Good boy.” Kimi smiled, taking the shovel from his hands and moving down to his feet. Seb felt light-headed and was glad he was lying down. He wanted to here Kimi’s approval again. It made him feel special, like the Finn wouldn’t give out the words to anyone for just doing anything. His skin tingled as he felt Kimi bump the shovel against his foot. 

Kimi dug his shovel in the ground where the Seb/shovel line stopped and got Seb to lay down in the same way, this time with his head against the shovel. They worked out a rhythm of working pretty quickly and in no time they were both digging a small hole in the ground, looking for a second arrow. Seb hit it with his shovel and brushed the dirt away from it. His fingers brushed the back of Kimi’s hand as they both went to free the arrow head so they had a direction. Seb blushed as Kimi read the arrow. 15 METRES.

“Fuck.” Kimi muttered, sitting back on his heels. Seb frowned at him, panting a little from the digging.

“What?” Seb said looking from Kimi to the arrow. 

“What are you’re feeling’s about being cut in half?” Kimi asked Seb casually, a little out of breath himself. Seb looked at him wide eyed. 

“Kimi!”

“Not good then.”

“You’re not cutting me in half just so we can measure a metre, no.” Seb smiled, laughing at Kimi’s ridiculous solution. Kimi sighed with a smile. 

“Alright then, lay down. Will have to guess.” Kimi got to his feet as Seb took his position. Kimi was physically restraining his tongue from darting across his lips at the sight of Seb lying so casually in front of him. He wanted nothing more than to crawl on top of him and finally steal his lips. But no. That couldn’t happen with all of these cameras around. If Kimi had have known how much sexual tension a few weeks in a jungle would put him under he would have told Bernie to stuff it. As it was now he was stuck. He sighed as he lined the shovel up against Seb’s feet.

Although, Mark and Fernando were pretty calm when they came back from seeing Seb off yesterday…

Kimi frowned, stopping what he was doing to consider that thought. Yes. They were very calm. Or at least Mark was. Fernando had dashed off to the creak. But Mark had seemed smug almost. As if he had pulled the wool over everyone’s eyes. Kimi had to focus on thinking back to that particular moment because he hadn’t really been concentrating. Everyone was talking and making a fuss and Kimi, at the time, was pissed at Seb for ignoring him. It was just-

Fernando had dashed off to the creak. 

Kimi finally got it. Understood the sated look he thought he could see about Mark once he’d returned. He had a feeling Fernando and Mark had done something… But that? Kimi couldn’t believe it. He felt almost like a proud parent. He laughed to himself, making a mental note to drop a subtle comment to Mark and Fernando when he got back so they knew he knew.

“You OK?” Seb asked, propping himself up on his elbows and looking down at Kimi. Kimi brought his focus back to Seb, letting the smile still hang on his face. 

“Yeah.” Kimi smiled, making sure the shovel was in the right place before he pushed his own into the ground and indicated for Seb to move forwards. 

“You laughed.” Seb stated as he stood in front of Kimi.

“Had a funny thought.” Kimi shrugged, smiling more as the thought returned. The mental image of Fernando’s horror stricken face when he told him he knew was priceless. He wanted to see the real thing. Seb laid down. 

“Care to share?”

“Not the best time.” Kimi said in a tone that promised he would explain later. Seb nodded and they continued moving down the jungle. They correctly guessed that a metre on Seb was about his hips and found the second arrow easily. Kimi noticed that it seemed to send them back the way they had already come. Before he could make a comment, Seb had already laid down waiting for him to measure the eight metres to the next arrow. The next arrow they found sent them back up, parallel to the second arrow they had followed by two metres. The next, again sending them back towards the start. 

“Bet this ends where is begun.” Kimi pants, wiping his forehead with the back of his wrist. Both Seb and he were sweating a lot due to the humidity and the constant digging. Seb looked up at him after clearing the words from the arrow they just dug up. Four metres, back down.

“It better not. That will be really annoying.” Seb sighed, lying down. Kimi shrugged before pushing off the tree he was leaning on and measuring from Seb to the next arrow. Three arrows later they were both standing in front of the tree with the instructions note on it. Seb looked at Kimi “Maybe we’ve gone the wrong way?” Kimi rolled his eyes before bending down, moving the red arrow, and beginning to dig again. Sure enough, they unearthed a brown bag with a dollar symbol on it. Completing the challenge should have probably felt a lot more satisfactory than it did, but they both just felt they were hot and tired for no reason. Seb took the bag from Kimi and they headed towards the Outback Shack.

“They better get this question right, I need a pick me up now…” Seb muttered, swinging the bag absent-mindedly as they walked. Kimi looked around at the trees, wondering if that is what started it off for Mark and Fernando yesterday. Or maybe it was a desperate grope because they’d missed each other. There was a hint of jealousy that floated through Kimi but it wasn’t as strong as it was before because he had what they had; he had nothing to be jealous about. Apart from this one, small, ingenious thing they had managed to do. Kimi pushed the thought from mind for now; he hadn’t even kissed Seb yet. That needed to happen first. An odd and unwelcome buzz of nerves danced in his stomach at the thought of kissing Seb. He pushed that away to. 

Interviewers split them up and got them to talk about the challenge and what they had to do. Kimi didn’t say much; he just moaned that they had walked round in circles when the prize was just under their feet. Seb was a lot more helpful and gave a brief account of how Kimi had come up with the idea to measure the distance, how it was tiring but fun and how he hoped the others would get the question right. They were then reunited and sent on their way to the Outback Shack. Seb had to pull Kimi to a stop as they passed the chalkboard against the tree telling them of their choice because the Finn blatantly missed it. 

“You sure you’re alright?” Seb asked Kimi, concerned. Kimi had been thinking about a situation he could create to get the chance to follow in Fernando and Mark’s footsteps and hadn’t been concentrating. Hell, he had been thinking, if Fernando and Mark can do it, why can’t we? Kimi was making it a competition between them even if Fernando and Mark didn’t know it. He wanted him and Seb to be one better than Fernando and Mark. Be able to share that kiss the other two couldn’t find the guts to do. Game on.

“Am fine.” Kimi smiled, stepping back beside Seb and reading the board. Popcorn or crisps. “Which do you want?”

“Well, we don’t know what flavour of popcorn it is… And we don’t know what flavour people like…” Seb was desperate for the thought of the crisp crunch to not bring the flavour of oak back into his mouth. And it seemed like a fun thing to be able to turn to Fernando and say See, this is how it’s supposed to be done.

“Crisps then?” Kimi asked. Seb nodded and they moved forwards to the kiosk. Kimi felt immediately repelled by the sight of it - the last time he had seen a kiosk they had given him a turkey’s testicle to eat, an experience he wasn’t willing to repeat. Seb moved to the counter, placed the bag on the surface and rung the bell with a little shake of his hips. Kimi wanted him to do it again, but it wasn’t really something he could ask at this particular time.

“Crisps please.” Seb asked sweetly. The guy in the shack, who Jenson kept calling Keith, took the bag and put it under the counter before turning a phone and lifting the earpiece to his ear. Kimi and Seb watched the chalkboard as it was turned round to show the question. Seb sighed upon reading it and rested his elbow on the countertop, his chin in his hand, looking downbeat. Kimi smirked at him.

“You know the answer to that, don’t you?” Kimi asked, unable to not laugh at Seb’s deflated posture. 

“Of course I do.” Seb sighed, hoping at least Nico would as well.

\- - -

It was quiet in camp. People were just milling around. For once, Fernando and Mark weren’t together. Fernando was trying to make some alterations to his bed whilst Jenson and Mark were standing at a gate, looking up at what Jenson was claiming was a tree house. Mark was only vaguely interested in it but had come over with Jenson because Romain was watching Fernando and him closely and it was unnerving. He had muttered to Fernando that they had a code gold – the word they had decided would mean Romain was watching them – and jumped into the conversation Jenson was having with Felipe about the supposed tree house. That was what had led him here. At the sound of the phone ringing, everyone headed to the telephone box, Mark and Fernando gravitating towards each other like magnets. Nico picked up the phone. 

“Hello!” Nico called down the line in a sing-song voice, still on a high about winning eight meals for camp. 

“Kimi and Sebastian won today’s Dingo Dollar challenge.” The gruff accent of Kiosk Keith said into Nico’s ear. 

“They won guys.” Nico called, ushering everyone over. “Ready for the question?” Everyone nodded and Nico returned to the phone. “OK.”

“In order for then to bring back their prize, you must answer the question correctly.”

“We’re ready.”

“How many Grand Prix wins did Michael Schumacher obtain throughout his Formula One career?”

“Shit…” Nico muttered before repeating the question to everyone else. Where was Seb when you needed him with all his Schumacher facts?

“A, Ninety-seven or B, Ninety-one?” Keith said before going silent.

“What are our options?” Jenson asked from beside Mark. 

“Ninety-seven or ninety-one.” Nico repeated. Mark sighed. 

“Where’s Seb when you need him, huh?” Mark said in a ‘this-is-just-typical’ tone. 

“For sure, someone must know this.” Felipe said, looking around at everyone.

“Yes, mate… Seb does.” Mark sighed.

“My gut instinct is the lower, ninety-one.” Fernando said.

“Yeah, but you don’t know if that’s right, do you, man.” Lewis said sourly from his position leaning against the edge of the phone box.

“No one does. We must guess.” Fernando said back calmly. They had a fifty-fifty chance of getting this right.

“I know my own race wins…” Lewis muttered back.

“That’s not really helpful, though, is it.” Nico said, turning to Fernando. “I’m with Fernando, we need to guess.”

“Seb is going to be pissed if we get this wrong… We won’t here the end of it.” Mark said with a big sigh. 

“Alright, I’m with Fernando, ninety-one.” Jenson said with a clap of his hands.

“Is the only gut feeling we have; I have no idea. We should go with this.” Romain said. Everyone nodded and Fernando suddenly felt worried. Now if it was wrong it was his fault. 

“Great, ninety-one it is.” Said Nico, telling the man on the phone. When Nico hung up and walked away with a smile on his face everyone else dispersed. Apart from Fernando and Mark. Fernando melted back into the Australian. 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Mark muttered in his ear, leaning him back to the fire. 

“Is my fault if is wrong.” Fernando sighed, suddenly feeling immense pressure on his shoulders that he hadn’t felt since Brazil 2012. Mark pulled him into a hug. 

“They won’t blame you, bub,” Mark cooed, rubbing Fernando’s back. Fernando gripped tighter. 

“Will. They will say – oh, well that’s what Fernando thought – and then it will be my fault.”

“But if it’s right then it’s your fault, yeah?” Mark said, letting Fernando go. Fernando breathed deeply and nodded. 

“Am being silly.” Fernando smiled. Mark mirrored his expression.

“Don’t worry about it too much, Fer. It’s just a small treat. We’ve got a big dinner coming tonight so it doesn’t really matter.” Fernando nodded again and happily took a seat next to Mark on his bed. His anguish and worry was washed away when Seb came bounding into camp with a smile on his face yelling, “We’ve got crisps! We’ve got crisps!” Everyone happily settled down around the fire and took they’re two crisps from the tray Kimi offered around. It was silent for a little bit and Seb was eyeing up Fernando, waiting for the opportune moment. 

“It feels like forever since I’ve had that sensation in my mouth.” Nico commented, closing his eyes and innocently resting his head on Jenson’s shoulder. Seb took his chance. 

“That’s how they’re supposed to taste, Fernando.” Seb smiled, reluctantly placing the last piece of crisp in his mouth. Fernando stuck his tongue out at Seb before copying Nico and resting his head on Mark’s shoulder. He could get away with it begin an innocent thing because Nico had done it too, and there was nothing going on between Jenson and Nico. Well, no one else thought there was. Everyone by Romain carried on like everything was normal. Romain was just staring at Fernando. 

“We’ve got a code gold, Fer.” Mark muttered as he turned to put their food tins down. Fernando sighed contently. 

“Do not care.” Fernando was tempted to show just how much he didn’t care by pulling Mark to him and kissing him softly, pretending they were back at home and the world wasn’t watching. He didn’t; that would be a very stupid thing to do. But he did stay on Mark’s shoulder and Mark let him, loving the homely feel to the action. 

After their crisps, everyone divided off to do their own thing. Mark and Fernando settled on Mark’s bed, just watching everyone, passing a comment to each other to make the other laugh gently. Sergio was having a muttered conversation with Lewis that seemed frantic and panicked whilst Lewis held his hands over both of their microphones. Seb and Kimi were heading off to the creak, the other four remained around the fire, picking up the conversation about tyres from earlier. Romain was barely listening though; he was watching Fernando and Mark. Kimi let Seb go ahead to the creak as he crossed the camp to Fernando and Mark.

“You seem relaxed.” Kimi commented, folding his arms. 

“Been a bit of a non-day for us. We’re pretty chilled, yeah.” Mark smiled. Fernando shot the Finn a dubious look. “Where’d Seb go?” No, Mark, that’s what he wanted you to ask. Fernando sighed as Kimi smiled slyly.

“Down to the creak to, err, clean off. I just came over to ask you if you needed to. You’ve been off on your own today, just the two of you. Wondered if Fernando had fallen down any more hills…” Kimi smiled. Mark looked at him like he was insane. However, when Kimi looked over to Fernando he was pleased with himself. There it was! Fernando’s horror struck face because Kimi knew about their dirty little walk. Ahh, That was fun. “Game on, boys.” Kimi muttered before turning away and heading down to the creak. 

“Game on?” Mark asked, turning to Fernando. Fernando still couldn’t believe Kimi knew about what they had done yesterday. His eyes were still wide when Mark turned to him, frowning. “What?” Mark asked innocently. Fernando let his eyes fall on the Australian before he pulled him up to explain, pulling his microphone from his neck. 

\- - -

It was dark when they had all finished dinner. Kimi was smirking happily over at Fernando and Mark who were speaking to each other in hushed voices with frowns. Seb had gone with Felipe to wash up which had left the Finn on his own. He just imagined Mark and Fernando trying to work out what he meant by Game on. Even if they didn’t want to get dragged into Kimi’s little game he knew it would appeal to Fernando’s competitive side and that would drag him in anyway. Kimi sighed happily, musing about the way he was trying to keep himself entertained. Especially if the producers were going to keep exempting him from the opportunity to do a trial. Fernando had hurt his back to! Why did Kimi have to ‘be careful’ if the Spaniard did not? Just because he’d had surgery and Fernando hadn’t. That wasn’t going to affect him. He pushed the annoyance from his head, lying back on his bed and seriously considering just going to sleep. 

“I see you’ve had a fun day.” A smirking, British voice stated. Kimi cracked open an eye to see Jenson sitting at the end of his bed smirking over at him. Kimi sighed, sitting up. So much for the idea of sleeping. He just shrugged at Jenson, not really knowing what he was implying. “With Seb in the Dingo Dollar Challenge.” Jenson elaborated, something he didn’t think the Finn would have done if the tables had been turned. Kimi grunted in agreement, lying back down. 

“Was a bit annoying.” Kimi commented, closing his eyes again.

“How so?” Jenson frowned. Kimi looked back over at him, trying to tell him to fuck off without using the words. His telepathic skills must have been rusty; Jenson just moved closer to him. 

“Seb has told you all.” Kimi closed his eyes again. Jenson waited for that elaboration he had handed over so easily just moments ago but it didn’t come. Of course it didn’t come. Jenson sighed, hitting Kimi’s shoulder to make sure he wasn’t asleep. Blue eyes glared up at him. “What?”

“Seb’s told us a lot. You mind being a little more specific?” Kimi sighed and sat up properly, sitting himself next to Jenson.

“About going in a circle.”

“Right, the dollars were actually under your feet at the beginning.” Jenson nodded. There was a small pause in which Kimi considered lying back down. “But a fun day with young Sebastian.” Jenson said, smiling towards the fire. Kimi frowned at him. 

“What are you implying?” Kimi pressed. Jenson turned back to him. 

“Little Sebi told us you had him lying on the ground for you.” Jenson winked. Kimi didn’t like that. Stupid wink. It was so coy and insensitive. Made Kimi think Jenson thought he was playing a game with Seb. He wasn’t playing a game with Seb. He really liked Seb. He was playing the game with Fernando and Mark, but that was just a bit of light-hearted competition to see who was ballsier. That was going to be fun. But he would never play games with Seb. 

“We needed something to measure the distance.” Kimi justified. 

“And you couldn’t have laid down?”

“It was my idea.”

“Right.” Jenson smirked again. Kimi was getting bored of him now. “So he just laid on the floor for you and waited for you to tell him what to do next?” Jenson teased. Kimi narrowed his eyes at the Brit.

“I don’t know what you’re implying.”

“Nothing.” Jenson obviously lied in a teasing tone. Kimi rolled his eyes. “You’re just… You know… Very close… Mark and Fernando close…”

“Like Nico and you?” Kimi shot back. The smile slid off Jenson’s face so quickly Kimi wasn’t sure it had ever been there. Jenson’s eyes widened a little as he looked back at the Finn. Kimi gave a small smile, knowing he had hit a nerve.

“I don’t know what-” Jenson started, but Kimi saw Seb return with Felipe and wanted to wrap this up. 

“You stare at him too much. It’s why Lewis got moody and snapped at him. Am sure you have not forgotten how Lewis feels about you. And am sure you can see how Nico feels.” Kimi said pushing himself to his feet. Jenson was startled but the ground-breaking news Kimi delivered in the most nonchalant voice ever. Though, it was Kimi Raikkonen he was talking to. Jenson grabbed his arm.

“Nico-?”

“-Yes, Jenson, Lewis still likes you and Nico likes you. Is all very obvious.” Kimi left Jenson sitting wide-eyed on his bed and crossed to Seb. Fernando’s eyes followed him and he watched Kimi lean close to Seb as if he was whispering something in his ear. Fernando focused back on Mark. What the hell did Kimi mean? What game had he started but not told them about. Fernando frowned back over at Kimi and it hit him. Hit him like smacking into a tyre barrier in a race. And he gasped. Kimi was really playing that game? No, Kimi wouldn’t be so stupid…

“What? What’s the matter?” Mark asked from beside Fernando. Fernando didn’t say anything. He just sat with his mouth slightly open, looking wide-eyed at something in the distance. Mark followed his gaze and immediately found what Fernando had gasped about. To anyone else, it could easily look like Kimi was whispering something in Seb’s ear. But Seb’s eyes were shut. And he was gripping to Kimi’s shoulder for dear life. And his lips were slightly parted; probably releasing his staggered breathing that could be seen if you looked carefully enough at his shirt. And Mark recognised the state he was in. How many times had he, himself, caught Fernando unprepared and reduced him to that state. Neither Mark nor Fernando could look away.

Because Kimi was giving Seb a love bite on national television. 

“That’s his game? This is a challenge, no?” Mark said in a disbelieving tone as he ripped his eyes away from the scene and looked at Fernando. Fernando nodded slowly. “Well fuck that.” Mark scoffed, shaking his head and laughing. That was ridiculous! Way to risky. People were already starting to ask questions. It wasn’t worth a war with Kimi and getting discovered on national television. No. Fernando and he had talked about it and neither of them felt ready to let the world know yet. But his laughing died away. And the smile slid slowly off his face. Because he’d looked at Fernando. And Fernando had looked back. And Mark had been expecting Fernando to join in his laughter, agree it was ridiculous. But he wasn’t laughing. No, definitely not laughing. His eyes were dark and wide and Mark had seen the look on his face too many times to not understand what it meant. He swallowed nervously. 

Fernando was accepting Kimi’s challenge. 

“No.” Mark said bluntly, turning away and folding his arms. Kimi and Seb had broken away now, luckily. They were sitting by the fire, chatting with Nico and Felipe. Seb had zipped his fleece up around his neck and was sitting very close to Kimi. Fernando touched Mark’s shoulder. “I said no, Fernando.”

“Mark, are not thinking about this.” Fernando said, pushing into the muscles on Mark’s shoulder that always made him melt. Mark focused very hard on not letting that happen. 

“I am. You’re the one who is not thinking.” Mark turned back to him and moved so his hand slid away. Fernando gave a small pout. No. Not just a pout. The Fernando pout. The one the Spaniard knew made Mark want to steal his protruding bottom lip and- “No.” Mark shot again. He had to turn away. He had to turn away so he could wet his lips without Fernando knowing how close he was to caving and not caring about the consequences. He had to care about the consequences. And he couldn’t if he could see Fernando’s face looking innocent and adorable, with his big, pleading eyes and the lip he just wanted to-

Fucking hell, Mark. Focus.

Fernando rolled his eyes and gave up on the pout. It wasn’t going to work of Mark wasn’t looking at him. Fernando couldn’t just reject this challenge like he hadn’t seen it. Kimi knew he would have seen it. That’s why Kimi did it. It was the beginning of the game. This is what I can do, will you match it or raise it? Fernando knew to match it would make the game short and that would be that. Thank you very much and a friendly handshake. He needed to raise it because he needed Kimi to know that just because Seb and he were in the new relationship phase where everything was fun and exciting and ‘oh, did he mean to do that? Did he really just graze my hand with his? Are we even doing this right?’ it didn’t mean they were better at being together than Mark and him. Mark and he were solid. Nothing was taking down this ship and Fernando burnt with the need to prove that to Kimi. He moved so he was sitting behind Mark and hovered his face by his ear. He let his tongue dip out of his lips to moisten them slightly, knowing Mark would hear the movement, and let out a soothing breath. Mark swallowed, trying to ignore the man behind him who knew exactly to unhinge him and turn him from the cool, sharp man he was to a babbling mess of pleading.

“Mark…” Fernando whined in a breathy voice. Mark closed his eyes. “We have to win…”

“We already proved something though, Fer.” Mark said, turning his head to look at Fernando and get his distractingly arousing breath off his neck. “He knows what we did yesterday. He can’t match that.”

“He will find a way.” Fernando said, sitting back on his heels. “Please…”

“Why does it matter so much? We know we’re great, why does it need proving?”

“Because next year will be hell if he wins this.” Fernando said, checking no one was up the hill to their right. No one was. Everyone was by the fire or down at the creak. 

“Fer…” Mark sighed. Fernando laid his hand gently on Mark’s left shoulder, the one furthest from the fire. He took a quick glance at the fire, making it appear like he was looking up at the stars, and saw Kimi looking their way. Perfect. 

“Don’t you want to beat Seb?” Fernando purred, a small smile pulling at his lips. Mark really didn’t want that as an incentive, but there was something pleasing about the thought. Finally beating Seb on pure talent alone: who could be the most secret at the same time as most obvious. Mark sighed as Fernando pushed the hand from his shoulder up into his hair on the left-hand side of his face. He looked Fernando deep into his eyes. 

“This could all backfire. Everyone could find out.” Mark tried to give Fernando a get-out clause but he didn’t want it. He gripped into the curls of Mark’s hair, holding his head still.

“The idea is to not be caught.” Fernando smiled but Mark didn’t emulate it. The Spaniard sighed as he moved closer to Mark. “Just trust me.” Fernando muttered with an innocent face and Mark finally gave in, sinking into Fernando’s touch on his face. Fernando copied Kimi’s technique and made it look like he was leaning in to whisper something in Mark’s ear. However, he didn’t use a hand to cover his face. He kissed from just behind Mark’s ear to the bend in his jawline before sucking on the skin there. Mark’s hand found his hip and gripped it, trying to pull him closer, just like they would if they were at home in bed, on a lazy Sunday morning when neither of them had very much, if anything, to do. Fernando left his mark on Mark’s skin and kissed it softly before leaning away and brushing it with his fingertips. Perfect. Mark still had hold of his hip and Fernando had to physically force himself not to rest his forehead on Mark’s. Instead he smiled and told Mark he was going to get ready for bed. Mark watched him walk away, trying to think of the best and quickest way to get rid of the throbbing between his legs. 

Kimi smiled and nodded in an impressed manner as Fernando passed the fire with his bed stuff under his arm. Fernando caught his eye and winked, accepting the challenge and beginning the game. Fernando had been a lot more obvious than he had been with Seb. The difference being that Mark had remained controlled and calm whilst Fernando sucked his skin whereas Seb had been overwhelmed by the new sensation. And Fernando could have been easily caught. It only took one person to turn around and they would have been seen. Or a camera to pull in on a close-up from behind them. They wouldn’t know if they had been caught on camera until they got out of here. That would be the real test. Fernando was proud of himself as he descended to the creak and washing area, toothbrush sticking out of his mouth as he changed in the dunny. No one had caught him, he had raised the game for Kimi and he had felt intimately close to Mark in what felt like a very long time. No one had been watching but Kimi. And that was the game. 

Unfortunately for Fernando, Romain had also been watching. 

\- - -

He was waiting for Esteban, right? The others had gone in with their teammate, that’s how this thing worked. It was going to be weird, going in late. He felt like he was cheating the others out of what they had already done. He didn’t like the feeling. But it was going to be OK because he was close with Esteban. They would get through it together. 

He looked down at the fleece with his name and telephone number on the back. Nico H Of course, he got the initial. He was coming in late. It annoyed him though; they may as well just stick a giant ‘2’ on his back just to make the point really clear. He was here second so he got the short straw. Great. Thanks very much. 

Where the fuck was Esteban? Nico would have looked at his watch if the fucking producers hadn’t taken it off him. He didn’t want to go into the jungle. He didn’t care about the bugs and shit but from watching the others on the television they already seemed to have a dynamic and Nico didn’t want to upset that. But it was OK. Esteban would be there and they could joke about how they’re cocking things up. It was all going to be fine. 

Or everything was going to be totally different from what he expected.

“Dan?” Nico asked in a confused tone as the Australian Toro Rosso driver approached him with his characteristic huge grin on his face. He extended his hand to Nico in a symbol of hello.

“Hey, Nico! Didn’t expect to see you here, mate.” Daniel smiled, pulling Nico close and clapping the German on the back. Nico echoed this. As they fell back from each other, Nico took in the fact Dan was dressed in exactly the same clothes as him. Oh no. Daniel noted this too, pointing between them. “Well, this is a little embarrassing.” Dan smiled, lightening the mood with a joke. 

“Yeah…” Nico said, slightly distracted. It set into his head and now he knew it was true there was no denying it: Esteban wasn’t coming into the jungle with him. Dan was going to be joining him. Dan who he barely knew and had expressed angrily at how he had got an easy root to a big team whilst the others all had to fight to remain in the sport. Dan who he had made a point of not liking to everyone who would listen because he hadn’t been ‘promoted’ on talent, just a lucky chance that Mark was retiring. 

Oh no.

Yeah, Nico was a bit bitter about the whole not-hiring-for-talent thing ever since Lotus blew him off for Maldonado. Maldonado? Was it for fucking real? The guy barely completed a race without getting a penalty or taking someone else out of the race. And it sucked because people like Paul lost their place in the sport just because Maldo-fucking-nado could waltz in and smack money on the desk. From what Nico had heard, Lotus were still having problems with getting funding anyway. Even with that big cheque floating in from Pastor

Though he’d have preferred Pastor to Dan right now. 

At least he could legitimately say ‘I hate Maldonado’ without someone giving him a ludicrous look. Everyone loved Dan. Happy go lucky Dan who happened to be in the right place at the right fucking time. Not that Nico wanted to drive for Red Bull… Not that they’d even taken an interest. He just wanted to be put in a team where he could spread his wings and win a race. Now he had to not be bitter about Dan and his fucking ‘luck’ because he had seen how tension could fly in the jungle. Just look at Nico and Lewis this morning! They’re best buddies on track but one wrong word and a lack of food and anyone will fly at the smallest of things. Nico suddenly realised Dan had been talking to him all this time and he hadn’t been listening. Not to a single word. 

Well, fuck.

Nico tried to pick up the conversation and seem interested, but it was pointless. Dan was talking about tropical climates or something and Nico just didn’t understand. Fan-fucking-tastic. He couldn’t follow him. And then Dan was laughing like he had told some funny joke. So Nico laughed to. A horrible, forced fake laugh that he was sure Dan would see right through. He didn’t. The Australian carried on rambling about sun cream and heat and tics and things and Nico thought he might be talking about the jungle. But no, Dan was back on about some beach with perfect waves to surf on but he couldn’t because Red Bull had told him not to in case a shark attacked him and-

“Wait, what?” Nico interrupted. Dan blinked and stopped mid-sentence, a little confused. 

“What?” Dan returned. 

“You said something about surfing.” Nico said, revealing he hadn’t been listening in the slightest. Dan blushed feeling like an idiot for rambling about pointless things. Nico didn’t care about all that crap. Dan sighed. 

“Yeah, just some waves that were perfect. Nothing important.”

“No, you said Red Bull told you not to.” Dan frowned a little. 

“Huh?”

“Not to surf… Something about sharks?”

“Oh! Yeah. Red Bull have banned me from surfing because I might get attacked by a shark…” Dan’s voice faded as he swallowed nervously. Nico couldn’t believe what he had heard. No. Fucking. Way. He knew Red Bull were all up for being really harsh on their drivers but banning Dan from surfing on a what if? That was ridiculous. Before Nico could pass his opinion, however, they were being ushered towards a helicopter by the producers of the show. They both nervously climbed into the back of the helicopter and were given big headphones that reminded Dan of the headphones the engineers wore on the pit lane. The door was slammed shut and before they knew it they were flying towards some mystery location neither of them knew about. 

“I expected you to be Jev.” Dan said to Nico, his voice coming through the headphones and sounding muffled and electronic. Nico turned to him. 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah. The others went in with their teammates… I just thought-”

“-Me too. I thought you were going to be Esteban. That’s why I was shocked.” Nico said to Dan with a small smile. Dan smiled back in relief. Nico looked out of the window and watched the stunning view pass by for a little while, trying to stay calm and keep his breathing even. It was just his name out of a hat that had landed him here, next to Dan and on the way to the jungle, apparently. Bernie had thrown the rest of the driver’s names together and picked out two. For some reason the producers of the show needed twelve. Bernie was more than happy to oblige considering the interest that the reality television programme had given to Formula One. 

“Where do you think we’re going?” Dan asked, sensing Nico was being a little reserved with him. He put it down to nerves and thought that talking could help Nico relax. Nico tried not to roll his eyes when Dan’s voice poured into his ears again. He turned to the Australian and pointed out the window at the jungle. 

“There.” Nico said a little bluntly. Dan didn’t seem to notice. 

“But where? Do you reckon we will go straight into camp or do you reckon we will have to do something?” Dan asked like an excited two-year-old. Nico didn’t answer him because Nico didn’t know. He hadn’t given it much thought. Someone came to his room a couple of days ago and said ‘you’re going into the jungle in a few days time to join the other drivers’. And that was that. Nico was given a rucksack and a list and told to comply with what the list said or it would affect camp when he got there. Nico didn’t want to cause any trouble so he had complied. The woman who gave him the stuff was very rude though. She didn’t even seem to notice that Paul was in the room. She just completely ignored him. Nico hadn’t liked her much. Nor Bernie. He really didn’t want to be going into the jungle, he wanted to be back by the pool with Paul, getting a tan and laughing about what they had seen on the previous day’s show and trying to guess what they would be doing whist Paul and he sat on sun loungers drinking cocktails. When Nico didn’t answer, Dan answered for him.

“I don’t reckon we’re going straight in. I think we will have to do something. I don’t know, earn our place? It seems too easy to just walk in and say hi considering some of the stuff they’ve had to do.” Dan was thinking about the food challenge Mark and Kimi had been subject to. He couldn’t watch. He had told Jev to turn it off because it was revolting but Jev found it funny how the people when knew to be hard as stone were having to eat the revolting things. He never got that about Jev. Sometimes the Frenchman had a sadistic side that was a little concerning. But he pushed the thoughts of the Frenchman away. He wasn’t thinking about that or what had happened. It could wait. 

\- - -

Well, fuck. 

“You’re kidding right? Sewing hats for five hours! What’s the point?” Nico was angry. This whole process just seemed pointless. He wanted to find a bed and lie down, not sew fucking corks onto fucking hats for five fucking hours. No. No. No. Dan looked at him nervously. 

“We’re earning meals for camp. The less we do the less meals we get.” Dan sighed, trying to show reason to Nico. Nico sat heavily on one of the high stools that sat behind the desk covered one side in hats and the other with a box filled with corks on red string. It was a little room with enough space to get two people standing side by side all the way around the three sides of the table (the fourth was attached to the wall). More hats sat on the shelves behind them. Nico sighed. 

“Read the instructions again.”

“You have five hours to sew five corks onto six hundred hats. Each fifty hats completed equal one star. There are twelve stars available. At the beginning of the trial you will have all twelve stars and loose them rather than gain them for each incomplete set of fifty hats. You will not be alone. If you want to stop the trial at any point, call “I’m a celebrity get me out of here”. If only one of you leaves half of the starts you collect will be unattainable. Good luck.” Dan put the laminate down and looked over to Nico. 

“’You will not be alone’ – that means bugs and animals and shit. How do you hold up with those?” Nico asked, trying not to sound as irritated as he was. Dan swallowed.

“Not too bad. I just don’t like rats or things that jump… Like crickets.”

“I’d expect to see those then.” Nico said, taking his hat off and running his hand through his hair. Dan’s eyes widened. 

“What do you mean?” Dan asked in a weak voice. Nico didn’t hear him and began pacing as he worked out times.

“Ok, so six hundred hats, five hours. Three hundred hats in two and a half hours. One hundred and fifty hats in seventy-five minutes. So that’s fifty hats every twenty-five minutes together, twenty-five each.” Nico concluded, stopping and facing Dan. Dan just nodded. 

“A hat a minute.”

“Right. A hat a minute.” Nico nodded and took his seat again. Dan took the vacant one next to him. “Can we do one a minute?” Dan shrugged.

“Sure.” Dan smiled, picking up the first hat and five corks and giving the same to Nico. They both waited and when a klaxon sounded they began. It was difficult at first because with no concept of the time they had no idea how long it was taking to do one hat. There was a dial on the right-hand wall that would give them a hat count every hour. If they were on target they should do just over one hundred an hour. It was quiet at first, both men concentrating one getting the hats done as quickly as possible. Nothing joined them in the first hour. They discussed the 2014 Formula One season and the challenges they were expecting. Both of them were beginning to relax and get used to putting the corks on the hats. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Turn the hat. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Turn the hat. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Turn the hat. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Turn the hat. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Hat finished, next hat. The rolling sound made both of them turn to the counter on the wall. They had made it through the first hour. Only four left. Maybe this wasn’t going to be so difficult. Nico watched as the numbers slowed and landed on the number of completed hats. He was happily surprised: 217.

“Two hundred and seventeen? That’s over our goal.” Dan smiled, putting his hat down and stretching his arms above his head. He took a swing of water but Nico continued to work. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Turn the hat. 

“Let’s not ease off. The sooner we get this done the sooner we get out of here.” Nico commented, eyes only on the hat. Dan swallowed his mouthful of water and nodded, picking up his hat. They fell back into the pace they had been working at before, now happily aware they were ahead of schedule. It did allow them to be more lenient. One of them would pace round the room a couple of times while the other still worked and then swap so they could give themselves a break. The conversation became lighter and full of more jokes and Nico found that Dan’s company was damn easy to enjoy. He smiled. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Turn the hat. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Turn the hat. Thread the string. Tie the knot- Huh.

Nico stopped working and sniffed again. Yeah, there was definitely an odd smell. That wasn’t there a moment ago. Nico turned to Dan to ask if he could smell it to but he didn’t have to. As Dan looked at Nico to ask the same question a steady flow of some kind of bug poured from the ceiling light and onto the desk. 

“Ergh! That stinks…” Dan complained, taking his hat and crossing the room away from them. Nico lent closer to them watching them dart across the surface like they’re trying to escape. 

“Cockroaches.” Nico explained, pulling the collar of his fleece up around his face and continuing with the hats. Dan copied him and retook his seat, brushing them away. They still work at good speed for the last half an hour of the time, but it is slower because of the disturbance of the cockroaches. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Turn the hat. Thread the string. Fuck, cockroach in my ear. Brush it away. Breath. Tie the knot. Turn the hat. Thread the- for fuck sake get off me! Push hands through hair. Brush them off hat. Start again. Thread the string. Tie the knot. Turn the hat.

It was a little relieving when the dial turned again on the wall. Another hour of what is turning into hell over. The conversation stopped ages ago. Both men just working and getting rid of cockroaches. They both paused, taking the time to drink some water, as they waited for the numbers to stop. Four hundred and three. They were over halfway in less than half the time. And they’d got eight stars for camp. Nico sighed in relief, picking up the hat and carrying on. He saw them first. He saw the first bugger running around the bottom of Dan’s chair. Well, fuck. Nico looked at Dan, who seemed extremely focused on the hat and didn’t realise he was slowly being surrounded by rats. Nico prayed he remained ignorant as he worked on. Just under two hundred hats left. We can do this in the next hour. It will be fine. Just don’t look down, Dan. Don’t look- The cork in Dan’s hand, or was in Dan’s hand, bounced across the floor. Shit.

“Crap.” Dan muttered, turning to climb off his stool and get it. Nico grabbed his arm.

“Don’t worry about it. Get another one.”

“But I reckon there is only enough to make six hundred in there. We need to find it.”

“Find it later when we know we’ve got them all in the bag. You might be wrong and then you’re just wasting your time.” Nico pleaded. Dan smiled at him, pulling his arm from the German’s grip. 

“It’s fine, Nico, we’re well ahead of schedule.” And then Dan turned. And it seemed to happen in slow motion. Dan yelled, and then clambered back onto the stool so he was standing on it, and then swore. A lot. And all Nico could do was try and yell over him and calm him down. Dan wasn’t hearing him. He was claiming they were crawling up the stool to get him. He was hysterical. Nico looked at the 403 that still sat on the wall, waiting to change the next hour. They still had three hours. If Nico could calm Dan enough then Dan could still help him. Nico breathed deeply. 

“Dan! DAN!” Nico yelled and Dan looked at him, panting hard. Nico held his arm. “Just calm down, alright? Sit here… Sit on the table. Put your feet on the stool. There, right. Now they can’t get to you. And you can see them. You can see them so you know where they are, yes?” Dan nodded shakily and Nico sat back on his stool picking up the hat Dan had discarded and gave it to him. “Please? Can you at least try and carry on?” Nico asked softly. Dan nodded with watery eyes and breathed deeply and slowly, his movements a lot slower and his eyes frantically darting to the floor. Nico knew he couldn’t do fifty in twenty-five minutes. He needed Dan’s help, how ever slow it was. Even if Dan only did ten hats in twenty-five minutes it was ten less Nico had to compensate for. They were calming again. Everything was going back to how it was. Sort of. Nico’s breath caught as the numbers on the wall began to spin again. Four hundred and ninety-nine. Two hours to get one hundred hats done (as Dan had placed another complete one on the desk for Nico to put on the shelf as the numbers stopped turning). Ten meals for camp. Ten meals! Nico couldn’t hide his happiness. 

“We’ve only got one hundred left now, Dan. Only one hundred. You’re doing really well. Nice and calm, deep breaths. It’s fine. We can do this.” Nico encouraged, focus going back to the hats. He wanted to do it within the hour and get out of this hellhole. He didn’t mind the bugs but they were starting to get irritating now. And the constant scratching of the rats as they ran around. It was grinding on his last nerve. (And if he wasn’t mistaken, there were lots of them nesting by his feet having sex which was just an appalling thought). He wasn’t showing his irritation though because he knew Dan needed to be told to remain calm. 

Dthunk. 

Nico froze. What the fuck was that sound. He looked at Dan but he was still working on the hat in his hand with his forehead creased in concentration. Maybe Nico had heard it in his head… Maybe he was slowly going mad. 

Dthunk.

Nope. Not mad. He heard it again. He looked up to the light above his head. Nothing. He looked to the window and the door. Still nothing. Maybe… Maybe he hadn’t heard-

Dthunk… Dthunk… Dthunk. Dthunk. Dthunk!

Dan heard it this time. And he saw it first. He whimpered curling into a ball on the table top, cowering away as the cricket jumped high in front of him. Nico watched as more fell from above them, slowly. And then suddenly there were millions of them.

Well, fuck. 

Dan was screaming. He buried his head in his lap and was calling for Jev. “JEV’S NOT HERE!” Nico was trying to yell over him, get him to uncurl. But Dan wouldn’t do it. Couldn’t do it. He was frozen with fear. Nico didn’t know what to do. He had to finish the hats. He finished the hats they got out. But Dan was incapable of helping anymore so it was just him against the mass of creatures sharing the room with them. Could he get the rest of the hats done on his own in the next hour? It might be possible. Nico sat again to set about creating another hat but Dan’s voice stopped him. Muffled as it was tucked into his chest. 

“I’m going to say it, Nico. I can’t stay in here.” Dan muttered. Nico abandoned the hat. 

“No, Dan, you can’t!” Nico said, grabbing his shoulders. “If you pull out now we loose half the stars we’ve got. We’re so close. Just stay here. I’m right here. I can help you.” Nico rubbed up Dan’s arms in a soothing manner, the same way he had done to Paul after Brazil when he was worried he wouldn’t have a seat next year. Dan remained quiet and Nico thought he had convinced him. He let go to get back to the hats. 

“NICO!” Dan screamed a blood-curdling scream. Nico returned straight to him. 

“What? What is it?” Nico said, trying to brush all of the cockroaches off Dan’s body. 

“Don’t leave… Please don’t…” Dan whimpered. Nico sighed as he set himself next to Dan of the tabletop, hugging his balled up body. 

“I’m not going anywhere. I promise, Dan, I’m not. But I need to finish the hats. I finish the hats and we get out of here faster, yeah?” Dan nodded and uncurled slightly, looking over at Nico. 

“I’m sorry.” Dan whimpered, sliding across the table so his side was pressed against Nico’s. Nico sighed as he picked up the next hat and started threading corks again. He maybe made five in the next time stint before the numbers rolled round. Every time Nico thought they were getting somewhere Dan would freak out as one of the fucking crickets jumped and Nico would have to calm him again. That took at least ten minutes. The numbers rested on five hundred and eleven. He’d made eleven hats in one hour? Nico was so annoyed. Just a few hours ago it looked like they were going to do it all with time to spare. Nico felt annoyed and frustrated as he put the twelfth hat with four corks on it down again and wrapped his arms around Dan, telling him it was going to be OK. Nico was seething. He wanted to go to the camp with the full haul of meals and then everyone would have to be happy about them turning up. This was shit. 

But then Nico froze again and all thoughts of getting the eighty-nine hats finished in the next hour vanished. Because the motherfuckers put fucking snakes in with them. Nico had deliberately not told anyone he was scared of snakes when they told him he was coming into the jungle because he was sure they would use it against him. Maybe they had asked his Mum or Paul. Maybe that’s how they knew. Production of Australian hats stopped in the Outback factory. Neither Dan nor Nico could work due to being scared stiff of what was in there with them. Pure relief untangled them and the klaxon sounded and the door was unlocked. Nico took one last look at the numbers on the wall. A new number had been added this time. Now it read: Five hundred and eleven hats = ten stars/meals. That would have to do, Nico thought as he and Dan practically ran from the little room. Ten was better than nothing. 

The ranger who let them out led them to a small clearing a little distance from the Outback factory where a lamp had been placed and two sleeping bag beds were on the floor. Dan frowned down at the set-up. He couldn’t understand what it meant. They were supposed to be heading into camp, no? The ranger handed Nico a laminate before disappearing.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding.” Nico exasperated. Dan didn’t bother to ask, he just took the sheet from Nico and read it himself. You will stay here tonight and then compete against each other to secure the stars you earned tonight for camp. Dan didn’t read anymore. He just looked down at the sleeping bags.

“I don’t want to, mate.” Dan said in a weak voice. He was still shaken from being held in a room full of his worst nightmare. Nico looked at him and felt sympathetic. The German put his bag down next to one of the sleeping bag beds and opened it up. Crouching, he held a hand up to Dan. Dan frowned at him. “What are you doing?”

“We’ll sleep better together.” Nico said, stretching his hand closer to Dan. Dan raised an eyebrow at him. Nico rolled his eyes. “No, not like that. You’re scared and I’m scared. I don’t want to be sleeping on the floor anymore than you but it’s what we’ve got and I’m tired…” Nico didn’t want to admit that having someone’s arms around him would help him sleep. He always found it difficult on nights where Paul wasn’t there. Dan sighed and nodded, placing his bag next to Nico’s and climbing in with Nico as the German zipped up the bag. Dan found his arms snaked around Nico with little persuasion and he buried his face in Nico’s chest. Nico had a soothing smell to him. Not overpoweringly manly but just enough to feel a sense of security. Like the arms pulling him close would protect him from anything. There was nothing romantic in the moment between Dan and Nico, both pretending it was someone else’s arms, but it was the comfort they needed to pull them into a light sleep.

Because God knows what tomorrow would bring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NO BUSH TUCKER VOTE THIS CHAPTER
> 
> Instead I need you to vote for who you would like to win out of Nico and Dan and who you would like the Camp to choose. You may pick them both for different options but this will have a ramification for the camp. The voting will close at 9:00pm UK time on the 24th January.
> 
> No dingo dollar this time so thats all I need you to vote for : )
> 
> Winner: Nico  
> Camp: Nico
> 
> Don't worry about voting formats as long as it's clear and keep voting for relationship if you want anything different. Send offs will start soon! I'll give you more details when appropriate.   
> Thanks for reading : )


	8. Day Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New campmates make the game that much more risky...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Finally!  
> I know it has been just over four months since this has been updated! Where did that time go?  
> I thought it was only right to get the new part up. Hopefully it won't be another four month wait for the next one! :P  
> I hope you're still with me on this :P 
> 
> I just wanted to make mention that the rating has changed. The voting for ratings was very close between "Teen" and "Mature" but my head ran away with this part (I'm sure you'll see the moments I mean as you read on). I hope no one minds : )
> 
> Enjoy! Lots to vote for for the next part : )  
> \- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“A distance dash?” Mark questioned, raising an eyebrow at the sunglasses-wearing Finn. Seb nodded excitedly.

“Like a race.” Fernando sighed, rolling his eyes at the German. 

“No. More like a distance thing…” Kimi tired. Fernando and Mark still looked at them blankly. Kimi turned to Seb. “Explain.”

“So basically it’s a test to see who can get closest to the creak without loosing their nerve or being detected.” Seb grinned. Fernando frowned. 

“Well, could do that now. People will not question. Is only so far we can go.”

“Or so we thought.” Kimi added with a smirk, referencing Fernando and Mark’s off road return from a couple of days ago. Fernando blushed slightly. 

“What’s the catch then, Seb?” Mark sighed, already missing just sitting on his bed with Fernando and talking like they had been only yesterday morning. 

“You have to hold hands. Clearly.” Seb beamed. Mark shook his head. 

“No way. We’ll all get caught.” Mark shook his head. Kimi smirked. 

“Really? Have not noticed Seb and I holding hands for past twenty minutes.” Kimi shrugged. Mark’s eyes dropped to Kimi’s knee where, very obviously, Seb’s fingers were linked through his. Seb laughed lightly at the annoyance in both Fernando and Mark’s expressions. 

“People only see what they want to.” Seb explained. 

“We will go first, over lunch, then you can go after dinner.” Kimi directed. 

“Done.” Fernando gave a sharp nod and held out his hand for Kimi to shake without Mark’s consultation. The Australian batted his hand away, glaring down at him. 

“Are you actually thinking anymore?” Mark seethed. Fernando openly rolled his eyes.

“Yes, Mark. Is fine. Are still winning.” Fernando smiled softly. Kimi frowned at his future teammate but Mark held his attention. 

“Fernando, it’s too risky.”

“Is fine.” Fernando turned back to Kimi, reaching for his extended arm. Mark grabbed his wrist.

“This is too far.”

“Have barely begun the game, Mark.” Fernando tutted. 

“Someone will see if we do this.”

“Are not sounding very confident in your abilities, Mark.” Seb teased. Mark, tried, to ignore him. 

“Will be fine. Get too risky and we abort.” Fernando promised. Mark sighed. 

“Would make sense if he did not want to… Doesn’t take risks very much.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Mark snarled, taking Seb’s bait. Seb shrugged. 

“Didn’t push too hard in Malaysia, no? Didn’t want to push to hard and take that risk. Is why I deserved that win.”

“What do you mean you are winning?” Kimi asked as Fernando practically sat on Mark’s lap to prevent him throwing himself at Seb. 

“Are winning. Have done more.” Fernando explained, restraining Mark’s arms. 

“How have you done more?” Seb frowned. 

“You haven’t fucked.” Mark spat. Fernando sighed, closing his eyes. Seb looked at them with wide eyes, shocked. 

“You…”

“No. They did not. But along those lines.” Kimi corrected, accepting Fernando’s silent challenge to take the game to the next level. Fernando grabbed Kimi’s hand and shook it quickly before grabbing Mark and his microphones off the log a small distance from them and dragging the Australian away. 

“You first. At lunch.” Fernando confirmed, pushing Mark towards the fire. Kimi nodded, letting out a small laugh and Fernando forced Mark to move away from them. 

“That was fun.” Seb smiled. Kimi raised an eyebrow at him.

“Am worried I am a bad influence on you.” The Finn mused. Seb just shrugged. 

“Maybe. Are not going to change though, right?”

“Course not. Do not really care.”

“Good.” Seb smiled, taking the microphone Kimi was holding out to him. He never wanted Kimi to change. 

-

Sergio moved away from Lewis. 

“So what are you going to do?” Lewis asked, storming after Sergio. Sergio sighed, turning back to the Brit. 

“Talk to him about it?” Sergio shrugged, unsure. Lewis shook his head. 

“You’ll have to tell him you looked in his bag.” 

“You looked in his bag.” Sergio corrected. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Lewis seethed. Sergio frowned in annoyance at him. 

“Other people will have seen you.” Sergio stated. Lewis moved away from him. 

“You see how far that gets you.” Lewis called back, putting his hat on his head as he settle down next to Jenson and joined the conversation with Felipe and Romain about who they thought was up for todays trial. Sergio stood at the edge of the ring, looking at Nico who was quietly eating his breakfast. Hair perfect. Looking camera ready. It didn’t seem so magical now Sergio knew he had contraband in his bag. And it wasn’t just hair product. Gum, mints, scented soap, extra clothes, a razor, and something that looked suspiciously like a half-eaten chocolate bar were a few of the things Sergio knew Nico shouldn’t have. The German’s bag sat on the bed just to his right. It was all in there, everything Sergio had seen. To accidently knock it on the floor and reveal the contexts to everyone seemed too easy – and a cheap blow. He didn’t want to get Nico into trouble he just wanted to understand what Nico was up to. Lewis watched Sergio closely as the Mexican moved over and sat next to the German. Nico smiled over to him as Sergio sat down. 

“You Ok?” Nico asked, swallowing his mouthful as Sergio fidgeted with his hands. Sergio nodded, fighting with his tongue around the questions he wanted to ask. “You don’t look it. Have you eaten today?” Nico placed a supportive hand on Sergio’s shoulder and Sergio felt touched by his concern. 

“Had a bit a little while ago.” Sergio shrugged. Nico place his own breakfast on Sergio’s lap. 

“You have to keep eating, Sergio. I know it’s hard but whoever is doing the trail today will get lots of stars today and we’ll have a really great meal later.” Sergio looked down at the food on his lap. 

“You have to eat too.” Sergio protested, trying to pass the food back to Nico. Nico just smiled softly at him, getting to his feet. 

“I’m alright, thanks.”

“You just told me-” Sergio started. Nico placed a hand on his shoulder. 

“Eat it, Sergio. You need it more than I do.” The German then crossed to his bed, slipped his bag onto his back and headed down to the creak. Sergio didn’t take his eyes off him. He knew Nico probably had food in his bag that he was going to go and eat and seeing him freely give up his food was just confirmation to Sergio of what he had seen. Still holding Nico’s breakfast in his hand, Sergio got up and followed him down towards the creak. Nico turned and frowned at him as they got about halfway down. “Are you following me?” Nico joked. Sergio kept walking until they were standing next to each other. The smile fell off Nico’s face. 

“I know.” Sergio admitted. Nico frowned at him. 

“Know what?” Nico played innocently. Sergio sighed. 

“I know what you are hiding in your bag.”

\- -

Everyone was sitting around the fire, waiting for Ant and Dec to come down and tell them who would be playing for meals today. No one could miss the evil, fuming glare Nico was sending to Lewis. Lewis was pretending not to be able to see him, avidly talking with Romain about what meal they hoped they got tonight. Sergio sighed at Nico, feeling a little bit bad. He had told the German the true account of how he had found out about the contents of his bag. Nico had been unimpressed to say the least. 

“You just saw it sitting there and thought you would take a look?” Nico spat as he walked Sergio deeper into the greenery surrounding them, their microphones discarded on a log just off the creak. Sergio fiddled with the hem of his shirt. 

“I was curious… Have been secretive about it since we arrived.” 

“Because it’s my personal bag.” 

“You have things you should not.” Sergio said in a quiet voice. Nico turned on him; eyes burning angrily and making Sergio shrink into himself. 

“Who helped you?” Nico demanded. Sergio swallowed nervously. 

“Helped me?” 

“I would never have expected you to do this. Who gave you the idea?” 

“I-”

“-Was it Lewis?” Nico spat, getting closer to Sergio. Sergio took an instinctive step backwards. 

“I wanted to-”

“-It was fucking Lewis, wasn’t it?” Nico glared. Sergio took another step back. 

“I-”

“-Wasn’t it!” Nico barked. 

“Yes…” Sergio breathed and Nico scoffed at him, heading back towards the creak. 

“Fucking bastard thinks he’s so fucking clever and precious.” Nico spat as Sergio jogged to catch up with him. 

“I wanted to look to.” Sergio tried, aiming to take some of the heat off Lewis. Nico shook his head. 

“Everyone wanted to look. Lewis just used you to do his dirty work. Fucking twat.” 

Yeah, Sergio may have done a bad thing. 

“This is weird, no?” Felipe announced to the circle around the fire. Everyone turned to him. “For sure, normally they come by now.”

“This is true.” Seb nodded, looking towards the entrance of the clearing. Nico continued to glare at Lewis. 

“Maybe they are running late?” Romain suggested. Kimi shrugged at his teammate, uninterested and trying to find the best way of crossing down to the creak with Seb going undetected. 

“No. No if they’re late something’s different.” Jenson mentioned. Everyone turned their attention to him. 

“Different?” Fernando asked, raising an eyebrow. Jenson nodded. 

“Expect this to be different. They’re might be two of us doing something.” 

“Two?” Sergio scoffed, breaking his eyes from Nico. Jenson nodded. 

“They’ll have done something to make things a bit more interesting I guess.”

“This isn’t fucking Hunger Games, Jense.” Mark laughed. Jenson shot him a look. 

“Isn’t it?” Jenson teased. Everyone frowned at him. Jenson didn’t get long to try and scare a few people though, because as he went to speak again Ant and Dec moved into the clearing, calling their good mornings. Fernando made to move slightly further away from Mark but Mark had noted the close proximity of Sebastian and Kimi and held the Spaniard’s hip close to his. Fernando sent him a confused look but taking in Mark’s raised eyebrow he understood there was the possibility of a bonus round. Fernando fixed his attention onto the presenters as they stopped in front of them. 

“Good morning campers, did we all have a good night?” Ant asked happily. There were a few grunts of contempt but most of the drivers nodded with soft smiles. Mark took the opportunity to slide his fingers down the back of Fernando’s shorts, rubbing soft circles into his skin. Fernando’s head whipped round as the rush of pleasure shot through his body. 

“Mark.” He hissed. Mark kept his attention on the presenters. 

“Shh.” Mark sent back, letting his fingers move lower. Fernando closed his eyes and tried to focus on anything but the pleasure Mark was forcing onto his body. For safe measure, Fernando took his hat off his head and placed it on his lap, running a hand through his hair to make the movement look more natural. Kimi smirked over at them; from the angle he was sat at he was able to see where Mark’s hand was. 

“So, today’s trial is slightly different to those we have seen so far.” Dec explained. Jenson smirked. 

“Told you.” He muttered over to Mark. Mark didn’t even hear him, completely distracted by how well Fernando’s was hiding what they were doing. The Australian let his fingers slide lower until they brushed on Fernando’s tense ring of muscle. Jenson didn’t seem to notice Fernando’s tiny whimper. No one seemed to notice. Mark smiled as he turned his attention to Kimi. 

“Today will see two campmates go head to head to win meals for camp tonight.” Ant continued. Most of the camp looked at each other in a little bit of shock. Fernando stared intently at the cards in one of the presenter’s hands; unaware of how tightly he was gripping to the log they were sitting on. 

“Mark started a new game.” Kimi muttered in Seb’s ear. Sebastian frowned at him, more focused on the presenters, until he followed Kimi’s gaze and saw how Mark was undoing Fernando live and in plain sight of the thousands of viewers. Any of them could have a close up on them right now. The risk of getting caught was almost not worth it. Seb turned back to Kimi. 

“Are we…?” Seb asked, implying a repetition of the action. Kimi gave his head one solid shake before he turned back to the presenters. 

“Not yet. Let them know later we accept the challenge.” Kimi smirked. Seb wished he could see how the smirk affected his eyes but the mirrored sunglasses prevented that. 

“Mark…” Fernando breathed. Mark removed his finger from him momentarily to rest his palm soothingly on his back. 

“Shh… You’re doing so well... I’m so proud of you…” Mark muttered in his ear as he pushed his finger slowly back inside Fernando. Fernando feinted a cough to cover up his sharp intake of breath. 

“But neither of these campmates will be you.” Dec announced. Everyone frowned over at him. Except Fernando. Mark’s words had stalled new determination in him and he looked up at the presenters, allowing his eyes to wander, determined to remain acting normal as Mark defiled him on national television.

“Last night, two new campmates completed a trial to determine how many meals would be available for them to claim today.” Ant said. Dec frowned slightly at Fernando before moving his eyes around to the other drivers. Weird. 

“Errh, yes.” Dec said, shaking his head slightly and dropping his eyes to his cards. Ant was slightly confused by his unprofessional stumble but he chose not to draw attention to it. “Today these two drivers will go head to head in a battle to win these stars.”

“Together, as a camp, you must decide who you believe will win in today’s trial.” 

“Whoever you pick will come straight into camp.” Ant said. 

“The other will not.” Dec concluded. Sergio and Romain exchanged a worried look. Fernando coughed again. 

“Depending on whether you pick the winner or not will decide the amount of meals for camp tonight.”

“You have a couple of hours to decide who you think will win.”

“Best of luck.” Dec finished. Everyone was still a little confused. 

“We have to pick who we think will win?” Felipe asked. Both presenters nodded. 

“Well… What is the trial?” Romain asked. 

“It is a head to head. So whoever you think can beat the other should be who you chose.” Ant said slyly, giving nothing away. 

“So who are the two we’re choosing between?” Mark asked as Fernando coughed again. Sergio passed him over a bottle of water, assuming Fernando was having some kind of coughing fit. The Spaniard accepted it and took a shaky sip as Mark held his finger still, pushed deep inside him. 

“Daniel Ricciardo and Nico Hulkenburg.” Dec said. “A laminate will be delivered to you when you must provide your answer.” 

“Good luck. We will see you all tomorrow morning.” Ant said, and with a wave both presenters disappeared from the clearly. Everyone fell into a conversation about who would they believed would win out of Daniel and Nico, the desperation to get all of the stars home being clear in everyone’s eyes. Kimi hung just out of the conversation, watching Mark and Fernando closely. He didn’t miss it when Fernando was about to take another sip of water and gasped, spilling the cool liquid down himself. Kimi shook his head, highly impressed by their guts. 

“Mark.” Fernando breathed in the Australian’s ear, digging his fingers into Mark’s thigh. Mark stalled with his finger again and Fernando tried to subtly squirm backwards. “Close.”

“Best time to stop then.” Mark teased, removing himself from Fernando and pulling his hands from his shorts. Fernando whimpered quietly in his ear but Mark just smiled at him cheekily. “Don’t you want to go for a swim? It’s a little hot today… No?” Mark smirked. Fernando resisted the urge to throw his arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. Instead he gave a small nod.

“Yes… Is very hot.” Fernando agreed. Poking their heads into the conversation momentarily they realised it had changed to Nico arguing about how they would address the other Nico when he got here. No one seemed to mind that Fernando and Mark declared they were going for a swim. No one seemed to notice how Fernando hovered behind Mark in fear of anyone noticing what they had done. No one seemed to notice the impressed look Kimi sent to Mark. But Romain narrowed his eyes at the pair as they both descended to the creak with their swimming shorts under their arms. And Kimi, Sebastian nor Romain missed it when their hands linked just as they disappeared from sight. 

“Are pushing it.” Kimi commented to Seb as the German lent back from the conversation where Jenson was trying to explain why ‘Britney’ was the best way to determine which Nico they were addressing.

“I saw.” Seb nodded, snuggling back into Kimi’s arm that was still wrapped around his waist. 

“Up for it?” Kimi asked, giving Seb the option to say no. Mark and Fernando had been together for a little while now but Kimi didn’t want to push Seb to do something he wasn’t comfortable with and compromise what they could have together. Seb, however, nodded. 

“Of course. Will be fun to tease Fernando next year when we win.” Seb grinned and Kimi found it very hard not to push their lips together. Romain blinked, eyes wide in shock. Looking around at everyone else they all seemed to be oblivious to the way Seb was pushed close to Kimi, the way Kimi’s fingers were curled protectively around his hip. Stunned and perplexed, Romain fell back into his seat and blew the air out of his lungs.

What the hell did they put in the water here?

\- 

Mark had let Fernando jump in first. He was glad he did. One of the most amusing things he thought he had ever seen was Fernando jumping into the freezing cold creak. The Spaniard’s reaction was perfect. 

“Fuck!” Fernando yelled as he resurfaced, hugging himself tightly as his muscles spasmed in the cold water. Mark sat on the rocks by the waters edge laughing at him, wearing only his swimming shorts. Both of their microphones were placed on their clothes a little while ago. This was probably as much privacy as they could get whilst here. 

“Cold?” Mark asked, grinning brightly. Fernando splashed water at him. 

“You lie.” He scolded. Mark threw his hands up in defence. 

“No. I said I thought it would be warm because the sun had been on it. You’re the one who jumped in unprepared.” Mark smiled. Fernando waded over to him. 

“Get in.” He asked softly. Mark relaxed back on the sun-covered rocks.

“Maybe later.” Mark feigned a yawn. This gained him a face full of water. “Hey!”

“You did this to me. Now deal with it.” Fernando stated, fear of being overheard unimportant now his microphone was far away. Mark turned to face him. 

“Did what?”

“Mark.” Fernando stated in a bored tone. Mark smirked at him, sitting up. 

“Anyone could come down at any moment, Fer.” Mark smiled. 

“Will be quick.” Fernando assured. 

“Jenson or Romain or Felipe could come down to do the washing up… Everyone could see…” Mark laughed as more water hit his body. 

“Get in.” Fernando demanded, preparing his hands to splash Mark again. 

“It’s cold.”

“Is not so bad.”

“From what you’ve been throwing at me I can tell it is.”

“Will keep you warm.” Fernando smiled, holding a hand out to Mark. Instead, Mark climbed over to the rock Fernando had jumped off and made sure to send water splashing all over his boyfriend. As soon as Mark resurfaced Fernando’s hands were on him, tracing the muscles of his bare torso. 

“It’s fucking freezing in here, mate.” Mark said, turning round and encircling Fernando with his arms. Fernando shrugged. 

“Guess we both lie then.” He smirked. Mark pulled him further down the creak until a bush hid them. He cupped Fernando’s face with one hand and placed a desperate kiss on Fernando’s lips that had the Spaniard rutting against him. Mark laughed at him. 

“Really that desperate?”

“Let me work you until you nearly cum and then stop, Mark, and we see how desperate you are.” Fernando said as Mark’s hand ran down his back. Mark nodded, slipping his hand under the wet material of Fernando’s swimming shorts and round to his throbbing erection. Fernando gasped as he took hold of him. 

“I’ve got some idea…” Mark mused, placing one of Fernando’s hands on the rock behind the Australian’s head to support him. Fernando’s other hand found Mark’s over erection.

“Can tell.” Fernando smirked. “Was very obvious when you were lying on the rock.”

“Really?” Mark asked softly. Fernando nodded as Mark took Fernando’s hand off him and place it on the rock next to the other. 

“Want to-”

“-Sort me out later; I suppose I owe you right now...” Mark smiled, placing a quick kiss on Fernando’s lips. Before Fernando knew it he had slid under the water in front of him, holding his hips still. Fernando wrapped his legs around Mark loosely and tried to find some purchase on the rocks under his hands as he felt the warmth of Mark’s mouth surround him. 

\- - -

Daniel woke up and snuggled into the warm protective arms surrounding him. He had had the weirdest dream and he couldn’t wait to tell Jev. He opened his eyes slowly and waited for his eyes to readjust to the bright sunlight. Jev must have left the curtains open again. He had some kind of fixation with watching the stars from bed. It was worse when they were in Australia. Dan had asked him about it one night. He smiled at the memory of Jev’s response to his question. 

“They’re the same stars you see in France, Jev.” Daniel laughed as he rested his head on Jean’s shoulder. Jean-Eric shook his head, turning to look at Daniel and placing a soft kiss on his forehead. 

“Completely different.” Jean sighed. “These are your stars.” 

“My stars?” 

“Oui. These stars always make me think of you and your smile. They try to be as bright but you always beat them.” Jean smiled and Daniel felt overcome by every single feeling he had for Jean-Eric. He cupped his face and brought the Frenchman on top of him, loving the picture of Jean’s loving face framed by his stars. 

The memory made Daniel smile. What didn’t was the ache in his back and the stiffness in his neck. Daniel tried to sit up, rubbing the soreness out of his muscles but felt himself restricted by both the arms around him and a tightly strained material bag. Slightly panicked, Daniel tried to pull at the material confines but they didn’t budge. He pressed his hand down on something hard and looked around, fear dropping in his stomach as his eyes took in the surrounding trees. 

“Fuck… If you wanted to wake me up you could have just shook me.” Nico moaned groggily, with a voice full of sleep. Daniel’s shocked expression snapped from the trees to Nico lying beside him who he had accidently pushed his hand into the stomach of. Daniel removed his hand as he fought with the zipper on the sleeping bag. “Dan… Calm down, what’s going on?” Nico tried, rubbing his eyes, but before he knew it his Australian counterpart had rolled out of the sleeping bag and wrapped his arms tightly around his knees. He tired to calm his breathing as Nico sat up. 

“I thought it was a dream…” Dan muttered once Nico had got to his feet, stretching his arms out. Nico looked down at him with a sympathetic expression. 

“Nope. You’re still stuck with me.” Nico yawned, scratching the back of his neck and trying to work out what time it was. Had they both really managed to sleep through the night with no disturbances? Daniel looked up at him. 

“Why do you say ‘stuck’?” Daniel asked. Nico shrugged, crouching down in front of him. 

“I’m sure there is someone else you would prefer I be.” Nico sighed. 

“But I guess it’s the same for you. You thought you were coming in with your teammate. Doesn’t mean I’m stuck.” 

“But you are.” Nico nodded, sitting down and taking a sip from his water bottle. He wasn’t going to tell Daniel that he would have taken Paul over Esteban. That was a big can of worms that didn’t need unearthing. 

“You say it like it’s bad.” Daniel shrugged, accepting his water bottle from Nico. Again, Nico shrugged. 

“Is it not?”

“No.” Daniel smiled and Nico couldn’t help but be infected by it, feeling his own cheeks pull up slightly. “Whatever stars we get to take back to the camp today are because of you.”

“Something tells me it’s not going to be as simple as ‘taking the stars back to camp’.” Nico muttered more to himself. Daniel frowned at him. 

“What do you mean?” Daniel asked. But before Nico got a chance to answer him a ranger was heading towards them holding a laminated piece of paper. Nico sighed as he got up and took it, giving it a quick scan with his eyes. He passed it to Daniel.

“This. This is what I mean.”

\- - 

“Guys.” Jenson said, moving back into camp with the laminate in his hand. Sergio and Nico stopped serving up lunch to turn to face him. “It’s time to decide.” Everyone gathered around the fire to get into the discussion about who they thought would win between Nico and Daniel. 

“Well, Dan’s an Aussie.” Mark started with a shrug. 

“And this automatically means he is tough?” Nico spat, his annoyance at Lewis still burning under his skin. Mark frowned at him. “Nico is a German. So he’s tough too.”

“Shouldn’t we just pick who we want to come into camp tonight and hope for the best?” Lewis suggested.

“Alright, who do you pick then?” Nico shot at him, patience running thin. Lewis shrugged. 

“Dan’s pretty fun.” Nico narrowed his eyes at him.

“Fun?” Nico spat deliriously. “You’re picking Dan on the bases of him being ‘fun’?”

“I think you’re taking this a little bit too personally, man.” Lewis set back with a frown. Nico reared up to unleash his anger on the Brit but his attempts were floored. 

“Think we should focus on picking who we think will win. This will get us most stars.” Fernando inputted, crossing the circle to Mark. Nico huffed. 

“Well I think Nico would be best.” He spat, serving their lunch up aggressively. 

“Ok,” Jenson said, trying to get the conversation back on track. “What does everyone else think?”

“Does anyone know either of them very well?” Felipe asked, scanning the circle desperately. Most people shook their heads.

“I sort of known Dan from Toro Rosso.” Seb shrugged. 

“Do you know what he’s like with bugs?” Felipe pressed. 

“Not really…” Seb sighed with a shake of his head. Mark smirked at his uselessness. 

“He doesn’t like rats.” Mark added. 

“Ok… Well that’s something.” Romain nodded. “Anything else?”

“Or things that jump. He doesn’t like their unpredictability.” Mark continued. Everyone seemed impressed. Seb just glared at him. 

“So that’s Dan… Anyone know anything about Nico?”

“Was it something about snakes or snails?” Felipe queried to himself. Everyone frowned at him. 

“What?” Kimi asked. Felipe turned to him. 

“Rubens said something about a joke they played on him in Williams.” Felipe explained. “Was either snakes or snails he does not like. Cannot remember but, for sure, is one of them.”

“So we’ve got Dan with a definitely on rats and things that jump and Nico on a maybe for snakes or snails?” Lewis summarised. A couple of people nodded in agreement. 

“Looks like Nico is the best to win then.” Nico smiled a little. Lewis narrowed his eyes at him, his patience running low with Nico’s weird mood. 

“Unless he’s anything like you, yeah.” Lewis spat. Jenson shook his head in disbelief. They were really going to start on each other again? Nico’s head snapped to Lewis, still smirking smugly. 

“I got eight stars, Lewis. How many have you got?” Nico asked sweetly. 

“I haven’t done a trial.” Lewis bit back. 

“You did a head to head and lost.” Nico pointed out. Lewis bared his teeth at him. 

“Are we going with Hulkenburg then?” Jenson said, clapping his hands together. 

“Seems logical.” Sergio nodded. Most of the circle agreed and so the decision was made: the camp had voted for Nico to win thus buying him a pass straight into camp. They just hoped he won now. 

“Ready?” Kimi muttered to Seb after sending a nod to Mark. Sebastian nodded enthusiastically, getting to his feet. 

“Am just going down to the creak to clean up for lunch if anyone cares.” Sebastian declared. Jenson frowned at him. 

“You could just go. It’s not like you could get very far.” The Brit asked with a confused expression. Seb just shrugged. He waited for Jenson to crouch next to Nico and direct him on cooking the rice before he turned to Kimi. He held out his hand. 

“Kimi?” Seb asked softly. The Finn took his hand and let himself be pulled up. 

“Sure.” Kimi shrugged and calmly the two of them crossed around the back of the group sitting on the logs by the fire and down to the creak, hand in hand. Nobody seemed interested in where they were going, all too focused on the food. Easy. Simple. Mission accomplished. 

“Bastards.” Fernando muttered, looking over to Mark as Kimi and Seb disappeared out of sight. Mark nudged his shoulder. 

“Yeah, but we did something they didn’t this morning.” Mark smiled. Fernando blushed a little at the memory. “I’m proud of you. You did well to keep it under control.” Fernando blushed more under Mark’s compliment. 

“But this was just a bonus. They cannot win this round.” Fernando pressed. Mark shook his head at him in an amused manner. 

“If they can do it we can do it.” Mark assured as Jenson came over with their food. 

“Who can do what?” The Brit asked. Mark just shook his head, taking the two trays from Jenson and passing one to Fernando. 

“Talking World Endurance Racing.” Mark smiled as Jenson moved back over to Nico who was smiling softly and holding out Jenson’s food for him. Fernando smirked as he looked over at them. Maybe a third couple would be joining in Kimi’s game. 

\- -

“Yeah, but why do you think we’re going?” Dan pestered, again. Nico, being in front of the little trek, openly rolled his eyes. 

“I told you, Dan.” Nico sighed, walking down the pathway they had been directed to follow. 

“The laminate just said ‘head to the Outback Canteen’” Dan pressed. 

“You’ve been watching so far, right?” Nico said over his shoulder. Daniel nodded at him. “And you saw Kimi and Mark’s trial, yes?”

“But they’ve already done that! They won’t do it again.” Daniel pleaded. Nico sighed. 

“We’re definitely doing a trial, Dan. There is no way they’ve brought us here for a nice lunch.” Cutting through the last bush Nico was brought face to face with a small building with a serving counter set in the back, a table with two chair facing each other set around it, an array of cameras pointing at the aforementioned table and the two presenters. Dan stopped close to Nico’s back. “Told you.” Nico muttered before carrying on into the small building. Both of the presenters smiled at them as they moved over to them, Nico folded his arms, already looking unimpressed, as Dan looked around, desperate to see something that made sense. 

“Hello, how are you both today?” Dec asked happily. Nico frowned at him. 

“Not too bad.” Dan sighed, giving up on his search. “Would have been better if we had had proper beds.” He smiled. Nico tried to hide his wince at Daniel’s happiness. 

“Well, after your shift in the Outback Factory last night we thought today we could treat you to lunch in the Outback Factory Canteen.” Ant grinned, gesturing grandly to the little shack they were standing in. Nico raised an eyebrow at him. 

“Today, you will compete in a head to head, winner takes all, bush tucker trial.” Dec declared. Nico frowned at him. 

“Head to head?” The German asked. Dec nodded. 

“You will battle it out to beat your campmate to win all of the stars that you collected during your shift last night.” Ant explained. 

“But that’s not all.” Dec beamed. Nico rolled his eyes. “This morning we asked your future campmates to select who they thought would win out of the two of you.”

“Whoever they have picked will head straight into camp after this trial, irrelevant to the result.” Ant continued. 

“And the other will stay at the Outback Factory until further notice.” Daniel shook his head. He didn’t want to stay here a moment longer, especially not on his own. He looked over to Nico but Nico seemed to be trying to hold a tough front. 

“Last night we saw you complete a six hour shift in the Outback Factory. How was that for you?” Ant asked. Daniel shook his head again. 

“Alright until you started filling the place with critters.” Daniel sighed. Nico nodded in agreement. 

“Well that shift was to determine how many stars, or meals, you are playing for today. You started the trial with twelve stars but because you didn’t meet the demands of the Factory today you play for ten.”

“Which is still quite a lot.” Ant nodded encouragingly. 

“To win these stars in today’s trial you are going to hold a series of Jungle Critters.” Dec said, playing absent-mindedly with the corner of his cards. Daniel and Nico exchanged a look. 

“That’s the trial?” Daniel asked sceptically; it sounded too easy. Considering what they had seen the others do for their trials both Nico and Daniel were dubious that that was the whole thing. When Ant and Dec both nodded it did nothing to settle their hesitance. 

“Well, this does not sound so hard.” Nico said, with a small frown.

“Hold them in our hands, yeah?” Daniel pressed. Dec feigned a moment of realisation. 

“Oh, sorry… Let me finished…” He referenced to his cards as if he had forgotten. “Hold a series of Jungle Critters… In your mouth.” He smiled. Daniel threw his hands over his mouth. 

“You’re fucking kidding.” Nico exclaimed. The silver lining was at least he didn’t have to eat them. 

“In our mouths?” Daniel queried, hands still protectively covering his and muffling his voice. 

“The time will start when the critter is in your mouth and you have to last twenty seconds to pass the round.” Ant continued. Nico’s mouth dropped wide open. 

“Twenty seconds!” He exclaimed. Daniel just shook his head. 

“Are they alive?” Daniel asked, moving his hands slightly and looking at the presenters with a newfound fear. 

“Twenty seconds in our mouths!” Nico exclaimed again. Dec didn’t even try to fight the smile pulling at his lips. 

“There will be five rounds, each round equalling a point.” Dec beamed.

“The driver with the most points at the end of the five rounds will win all ten stars.” Ant continued.

“In the event of a tie there will be a decider round.” Dec finished. 

“Of course, you do not have to do the trial but that means you will not have the opportunity to win any stars.” Ant added. Nico turned to Daniel. 

“This is ridiculous, mate.” Daniel said to the presenters.

“We’ve got to do it though, no?” Nico said. Daniel looked at him like he was mental. 

“Twenty seconds with a live thing running around your mouth. You think you can do it?” Dan challenged. Nico’s eyes flashed at the idea of the competition. 

“I'm not turning up to camp with no stars.” Nico added. Daniel dropped his hands. “There’s only one way to find out if I can do it.” The German shrugged. 

“So are you ready to get going?” Dec smiled. 

“No, but I’ve got to so yes.” Daniel sighed. 

“How hard can it be?” Nico shrugged. As the words passed his lips, he thought: Probably famous last words…

“Lets get you sat at the table then.” Dec grinned, clapping his hands together. Nico crossed around the table and sat in the chair closest to the presenters whereas Daniel sat in the one he was leaning on. Sitting opposite Nico the Australian could see and sense the air of competition floating around them. Nico placed his water bottle on the table and Dan emulated the action. 

“You ready for this?” Nico asked, a small smirk on his lips. Daniel looked at him dubiously. 

“You think this is going to be easy don’t you.” Daniel queried. Nico shrugged. 

“I don’t think you’re going to last very long, no. I reckon as long as I compete three I can win.” Nico smiled. Daniel extended his hand across the table. 

“You’re going to have to complete all five and beat me at the tie break to get your hands on those stars.” Dan beamed, his voice a lot more confident that he felt. Nico took his hand. 

“You’re on.”

“Alright. So let’s see what the first Critter is.” Dec said, appearing with Ant at the end of the table. A ranger brought a tray over with a covered plate and placed it in front of Daniel. Nico looked up at the presenters. 

“Do we both do the same bug on each round?” He asked. Ant nodded. 

“We’ll alternate who goes first.” He said and Nico turned his attention back to Daniel. Daniel winced as the ranger lifted the lid and Nico saw the long, green colour bug first as it dashed across the table. 

“Fuck, he’s fast.” Nico commented, crouching down to get a closer look at the bug. Daniel eyed him as if looking at a crazy person. The ranger caught the bug as it headed for the edge of the table. 

“He is a Lion Stick Insect.” Dec announced. Nico rocked back in his chair. 

“Still confident you can do this?” Nico asked. Daniel nodded, not saying anything. 

“Are you ready?” Ant asked as the ranger held the insect softly in his hands. Giving the little green thing one last look, Daniel closed his eyes and nodded, opening his mouth. “Alright… For twenty seconds. Give us a thumbs up when you’re ready to start the time.” Nico squinted a little in discomfort as the green insect was placed between Daniel’s lips and the Australian pressed his teeth softly into it’s hard back to keep it in place. Once of Daniel’s hands gripped the edge of the table tightly as he lifted the other shakily to give the presenters a thumbs up. 

“Twenty seconds.” Dec said. “Time started now.” It felt like the longest twenty seconds of Daniel’s life. He was forcing his tension into his hand gripping the table out of fear of biting down on the poor little creature. The weirdest sensation was when it stroked its leg across his tongue. He wasn’t ready for it and the sudden movement from the before subdued animal made him jump. He felt his teeth clamp down slightly as he flinched and the movement of the creature’s legs became more insistent. He moaned in panic, forcing the tension to clamp his hand to the table rather than the insect. Nico shook his head slightly. He really wished he had gone first. “Almost there. Five seconds.” Daniel thumped his free fist down on the table a couple of times, desperate to not tighten his jaw any more than it already was. “Time. Well done, Daniel. Let’s get him out.” Pure relief flooded Daniel’s system as he felt a hand brush against his cheek. He opened his mouth and felt the creature removed from his mouth but before he got a chance to see it it had been covered up and moved away. Daniel followed it across the room. 

“Is he Ok?” Daniel asked, fear of him having bit too hard gripping at his chest. 

“Absolutely fine.” The ranger assured as Daniel watched him put the stick insect back in its container with a few others. Nico’s eyes were focused on the tray that had just been placed in front of him. He really wished he had gone first. The ranger lifted the lid and Nico frowned down at the little creature. 

“Is it alright?” Nico asked, slightly worried, as his stick insect sat motionless on his plate. Daniel took a swig of water as he watched his opponent closely. 

“This one looks a bit more passive.” Ant commented with a small shrug. Nico nodded a little, sitting back as the ranger picked the stick insect up. “I don’t think we’ve ever seen our contestants so worried about the critters, do you?” Ant asked his co-presenter. Dec shook his head. 

“Most are more concerned that it’s about to go in their mouth.” Nico shrugged at Dec’s comment, watching as the stick insect ran in mid air trying to get away from its captor. 

“It’s alive I don’t want to hurt it.” Nico muttered. Turning to face Daniel he looked him straight in the eyes as he opened his mouth. The ranger placed the bug between his lips and Nico held it in place, raising a calm thumbs up to the presenters. 

“Ok, time starts now.” Ant declared. Daniel found it unnerving to have Nico staring at him through the challenge. The way he looked so calm and callous sitting with the stick insect placed in his mouth was unnatural but also made Daniel feel slightly pathetic. He knew he hadn’t looked that relaxed when he was playing out his side of the challenge. But he had completed it, hadn’t he? He had got the first point. 

“Is it moving its legs yet?” Daniel asked, curiously. Nico gave a soft shake of his head, holding Daniel’s gaze. Daniel dropped his eyes to the chilled bug in Nico’s mouth. Nico was bouncing his heel in apprehension. He was desperate to not bite down on the little thing. He may be able to feel it’s rough body and hard shell under his teeth but he still didn’t want to cause it pain. Come on, we can do this… Just stay nice and still and then you can go back to safety and we never have to see each other again. Nico thought desperately. 

“Five seconds.” Ant stated. Nico nodded, still looking at Daniel but Daniel had stopped looking back. “Done. Well done, Nico. That’s one point each.” Ant smiled. The ranger came and took the bug from Nico’s mouth and Nico smirked over at Daniel as he took a swig of his water. “How was that?”

“Not so bad.” Nico shrugged, setting his bottle back down on the table. Daniel blinked at him. 

“Bit twiggy… I think we were both just trying not to hurt it.” Daniel said and Nico nodded in agreement. 

“Alright. Nico, you’ll be first for this round. Let’s see what you’ve got.” Dec said and the ranger brought over the next tray. Both Nico and Daniel lent forwards a little as the ranger lifted the cover off the top. Whatever it was was being held under a second glass container on the plate. Nico frowned, leaning closer to the glass to get a better look at it. Daniel had fallen back, eyes wide in fear. “This is a King Cricket.” Dec said. Nico smirked over at Daniel. 

“A cricket?” Nico asked lightly. Daniel had closed his eyes and was focusing on his breathing.

“Yes.”

“What’s that bit on its arse?” Nico asked, genuinely curious, as the ranger collected up the little thing.

“I don’t think you will want us to go into that.” Ant smiled. Nico nodded. 

“Ok.” Again, his set his gaze on Daniel as he opened his mouth. The Australian had opened his eyes and was shaking his head in disbelief. The ranger moved the cricket towards Nico’s face but the cricket shot it’s legs back, catching his cheek. “Ow. Fuck. What was that?” Nico asked, shifting slightly away from the cricket and rubbing his cheek, looking up at the ranger for an answer. 

“Just his back legs.” Dec explained. Nico took a deep breath before opening his mouth again. 

“It tried to jump?” Daniel asked, his voice faltering slightly. The question wasn’t answered as the ranger manoeuvred the cricket back into Nico’s mouth. This one was easier to hold because he could keep it in place with his lips and not have to use his teeth at all. He stuck his thumbs up as Daniel covered his face with his hands. 

“Ok, time starts now.” Ant nodded. Nico didn’t like the cricket at all. Its back legs were resting on his tongue and whatever was on its arse was wiggling slightly, brushing on the roof of his mouth. Nico wanted to swallow but the impulse was overridden by the fear of dragging the creature further into his mouth. He could feel his gag reflect tingling and he shut his eyes, forgetting trying to psyche Daniel out, as he determinedly kept the creature in his mouth. 

Daniel could barely look. It was so unnatural. Nico just had this cricket’s head blocking his face where his mouth should have been. The cricket looked calm and Daniel couldn’t tell how Nico was feeling. His breathing was regular and his eyes were closed, brow furrowed in determination. How the hell was he going to do this? A cricket? A fucking cricket? He willed Nico to bail out just so he didn’t have to do it. 

“Five seconds.” Ant said. Nico’s heels were bobbing at a rapid pace, declaring his uncomfortableness at the situation he had found himself in. He didn’t care. He didn’t care if everyone watching this programme was laughing at him. He just kept thinking about Paul. About how Paul was probably watching this alone right now and willing him to do well. Just as Ant called time he gaged. The ranger had to leap forwards to catch the cricket and Nico projected it from his mouth. Trying to keep his hands still and not shake too much, Nico opened his eyes and reached for his water bottle. It didn’t work; the sip of water he took was shaky and obviously so. Daniel was staring at him with wide eyes. 

“How the fuck did you do that?” Daniel breathed, his face loosing what little colour it had left. Nico shook his head with damp eyes, taking another sip of water. 

“That one was harder?” Dec encouraged. Nico shot him a dark look. 

“Ask me when he’s done.” Nico requested, gesturing to Daniel. Daniel shook his head. 

“I’m not doing that.” Nico frowned at him a little. 

“Yes you are.” Nico said. Daniel shook his head more insistently. 

“No… No, I can’t…”

“You can.” Nico insisted.

“Are you passing on this round?” Ant asked as the ranger hovered next to him with the tray. Daniel opened his mouth but no words came out. 

“No, he’s not.” Nico said confidently. Daniel glared at him as the tray was placed in front of him. Nico held out his hand. “You can do this, Dan.”

“Nico, I-”

“Here.” Nico pushed his hand closer to Daniel but when the Australian still made no motion to move Nico grabbed his hand off the table and squeezed it encouragingly. Daniel looked from their hands to Nico with a frown. “Pretend I’m someone else.” Nico said lightly. Daniel’s thoughts flew straight to Jev. He didn’t look down as the cover was lifted from the plate in front of him, he looked directly down the camera that was pointed towards him, as if he was looking directly at Jev. 

“Ready?” Dec asked. Nico gave Daniel’s hand another encouraging squeeze as the Australian closed his eyes, opening his mouth. The cricket was placed between Daniel’s lips and as soon as the ranger had moved away Daniel waved his thumb in the air. “Ok, start the time.” Nico cooed encouraging worlds constantly at him, making sure Daniel would get through this. Daniel’s grip intensified and Nico assumed the things was moving inside his mouth. Daniel was letting his mind swim with visions of Jev. Jev talking, Jev sitting, Jev smiling, Jev driving. Anything. Everything. Things that would keep his mind completely off what he was doing.

“You’re doing so well, Daniel.” Nico smiled, rubbing the back of his hand softly like he did for Paul. It was clear Daniel wasn’t listening but Nico didn’t care. He felt like he was doing his part. 

“Five… Four… Three… Two… One… Well done.” Dec counted down. The ranger was right on hand to take the cricket straight from Daniel’s mouth when the time stopped and Daniel took a gasping breath, opening his eyes as tears rolled out of them. He wiped at his face messily. 

“You did it, Dan.” Nico smiled, pulling his hand back. Daniel laughed out of pure relief, suddenly feeling on top of the world like anything was possible. 

“Another point for each of you which brings the score to two all.” Ant said. 

“How was that one compared to the first?” Dec asked. 

“Wrong. It was knobbly and it kept moving and it’s something I never want to experience again.” Daniel admitted, smiling from ear to ear. Nico just nodded in agreement, feeling so proud of Daniel. 

“Ok, Daniel, back to you for round three.” Ant said and Daniel nodded as the ranger brought the next tray over. “Let’s see what you’ve got.” The cover was lifted and what looked like a flat brown oval with legs was revealed. Nico’s eyes widened as it ran around the plate with incredible speed. Daniel dropped his head into his hands, all reminiscences of his smile vanished. 

“This is wrong… This is so wrong on so many levels…” Daniel moaned. Nico could help but laugh in agreement. 

“This is a burrowing cockroach.” Ant explained as the ranger scooped it up. Daniel fell back in his chair, opening his mouth and closing his eyes. 

“Just do it.” Daniel stated. Nico smiled at his perfect Nike reference. Without any further comment the ranger moved forwards and put the whole cockroach in Daniel’s mouth. Nico’s eyes widened in fear and his hands dug into his hair as the ranger moved away to reveal only the tiniest bit of cockroach visible from between Daniel’s lips. Daniel lifted both thumbs up and the time was started. 

“Holy shit, Dan, how the fuck are you doing that?” Nico asked, shaking his head with his stomach churning. He was feeling sick just watching Daniel. “That thing is huge.”

“Ten seconds.” Dec called. Suddenly Daniel started flailing his arms and screaming, the sound muffled by the cockroach in his mouth. Nico froze in panic as Daniel squeezed his eyes shut tighter and began shaking his head rapidly, inhuman noises escaping his mouth. “Five seconds, just a little longer.” Dec yelled over the horrific noises. Nico was frozen in fear. What the fuck was going on?” “Done. Congratulations.” Dec breathed as Daniel spat the bug onto the floor and got up, moving to the edge of the shack and spitting into the bushes before gaging. The doctor, Bob, came over to check him out but once he had calmed down and stopped reaching he was lead back to the table and sat down, breathing heavily. He swirled some water in his mouth and spat it out beside him before drinking a few mouthfuls slowly. 

“Well done, Dan, that’s three points. What happened there towards the end?” Ant asked as Daniel lent forwards, dropping his head on the table. 

“Some sort of fucking liquid started coming out of it.” Daniel breathed. Nico’s mouth fell open.

“Liquid?” He whispered, his voice barely audible. Daniel looked up at the presenters. 

“It was fucking horrible. Don’t tell me what it was. I never want to know.” Daniel sighed, leaning back in his chair. 

“Ok, Nico? Ready to take a look?” Dec asked, turning to the German. Nico still didn’t move but the slight shrug of his shoulder gave the ranger the indication to move forwards with the tray. He didn’t say anything. He just opened his mouth and closed his eyes. The ranger placed the weird, revolting tasting bug in his mouth and his shakily raised his thumbs. Just as the time was started the cockroach turned in his mouth so it was sideways and Nico began to panic. He was already shaken up by the prospect of the bug but now his entire body was shaking and he couldn’t close his mouth and he was suddenly finding it hard to breath because the cockroach was sitting quite far back in his mouth. He tried, twice, to spit the thing out but it had wedged itself in his mouth. It was stuck. He couldn’t get rid of it. The more that thought dawned on his the more he began to panic and scream. No one could do anything to help and with five seconds left no one wanted to. 

“You’re nearly done, Nico.” Daniel called across the table at him. Just as Nico shot his panicked gaze towards Daniel the time stopped and the bug was pulled from his mouth. 

“It got wedged in.” The ranger muttered to Dec as he passed with the bug. Nico gasped for breath, pushing the chair back and leaning his head between his knees. 

“Three points each. Well done to both of you.” Ant said softly. 

“Are you alright, Nico?” Dec asked. Nico sat himself up, reaching blindly for his water bottle. Daniel pushed it into his grasp and watched Nico drink slowly from it. 

“Yeah… I’m… I’m good…”

“Let me go first on the next round to let him catch his breath, yeah?” Daniel asked. Ant and Dec exchanged a look. “Come on! It’s only fair. He can barely breath and you’re contemplating shoving something else in his mouth!” Daniel seethed at the fact they even had to think about it. Nico looked over at Daniel. 

“I’m... I’m Ok, Dan…” Nico said in a barely audible voice. Daniel shook his head. 

“Is it really going to make that much difference? We both still have to do it! Let me go first now and Nico can go first on the last round.” Daniel proposed. Dec pressed his finger to his ear, listening to his earpiece. 

“Ok. It has been decided that Daniel will go first on the next round so Nico can recover from his panic attack.” Dec nodded. Nico took a deep breath. 

“Good. Let’s get this over with.” Daniel said with a nod. The ranger brought the tray over and placed it in front of the Australian. With no words, the cover was lifted to reveal a murky blue coloured little lobster looking thing. Nico took another sip of water as he waited to be told what the creature was. Daniel frowned at it as the ranger lifted it from the tray. It furiously flapped its tail up and down. 

“The next critter is a Yabby.” Ant said. The mood of the challenge had changed as neither of the drivers were willing to hang around anymore. Daniel just closed his eyes and opened his mouth, waiting for the blue thing to be put in his mouth. “Twenty seconds.” Ant continued as Daniel stuck his thumb in the air. It was so wrong. The desperate insect in his mouth flapped its tail frantically just as it had when the ranger was holding it. The delicate scales smacked into the roof of his mouth and his tongue in a repetitive manner that was almost hypnotic. But it wasn’t pleasant or relaxing in the slightest. Daniel tried to not think about it but the Yabby was spreading a foul taste in his mouth that was making his eyes water, even though they were closed. When it was pulled from his mouth he took deep shuddery breaths, swirling his mouth with water and spitting it out again. 

“That’s four points for Daniel. If Nico doesn’t complete this then you will take the lead going into the final round.” Ant explained. Daniel nodded, looking over at Nico. Nico had been so calm and cool at the beginning of this trial that now looked reproachful as the ranger placed his tray down in front of him. All sense of competition was out of the window, they both just wanted to get through this with some dignity still in tact. 

“It’s much easier than the ones before, mate.” Daniel encouraged softly. Nico just nodded as the cover was moved and, alike Daniel, waited for no instruction before opening his mouth. Nico seemed calmer with the fact he could actually close his mouth this time. And still breathe normally. He focused on channelling the air through his nose which was working until the Yabby began to flap his tail. Daniel watched as Nico shook his head slightly bouncing his knees in desperation to stop the confusing sensation in his mouth. 

“Five seconds.” Dec said as Nico opened his eyes. Daniel could see he was going to bail. In desperation Daniel shook his head. 

“You’re nearly done now anyway.” He almost pleaded across the table. Nico held his eye contact but instead of the calm stony gaze he achieved earlier it was panicked and full of fear. Nico didn’t care that he spat the Yabby across the table when time was called. This trail was a lot harder than it first appeared. 

“Four points each.” Dec said with a wiry smile. “This takes us to our fifth round. Nico, you’ll go first.” He instructed. Nico frowned as not a tray but a cup with a lid was placed in front of him. He slid his chair back so his chin could rest on the table and he could see the contents of the glass. A spider. A fucking spider. 

Well, fuck. 

“This is a water spider.” Ant explained. Daniel looked up at him whereas the long spindly legs of the creature in front of him fixated Nico. “When you are ready, the ranger will spin the glass so the spider curls into a ball and then will tip the spider into your mouth, starting the timer.” Daniel’s eyes widened as he looked across the table to Nico who was nodding. 

“You’re going to do this?” Daniel asked as Nico took a swig of water. He swallowed roughly. 

“I’ve got to.” Nico sighed. The ranger pulled off the lid. 

“You’re mental.” Daniel said with a shake of his head. Nico shrugged. 

“This means you’re not going to, yes?”

“It’s not on my list of things to do today.” Daniel shrugged. Nico had to smile at that. 

“Has any of this been?”

“The stick insect might have been.” Daniel teased. Nico let out a small laugh. 

“Are you ready for this round, Nico?” Ant asked, pulling the conversation back to the competition. Nico shrugged. 

“It’s just twenty seconds, right?” He shrugged. Daniel shook his head at him. Nico watched as the ranger spun the glass. It was interesting to see the way the spider curled into itself. A defence mechanism bedded into it from birth. And the ranger stopped spinning the glass; Nico lent his head back and opened his mouth. There was a sense of inevitability as it happened. Nico saw it slowly began to uncurl as it was tipped towards him. One of those legs stretching forwards and brushing his nose. And it’s body being forced forwards. Nico closed his eyes as the pain shot through his lip. Out of impulse he threw himself sideways off the chair, clutching at the point of contact. “Mother fucker!” Nico spat, tapping his lip gently and checking for blood. Daniel sat wide-eyed staring at him. 

“You alright?” Dec asked as the ranger placed the cover back on the glass. Nico rested his arms on the seat of the chair. 

“It stung me.” Nico seethed, his lip throbbing painfully. The presenters exchanged a look. 

“Ok. They’re not dangerous, but let’s just get Bob to check you out and make sure you’re OK.” Ant instructed, beckoning someone over. Nico let himself be guided back to his chair as the man who had helped Daniel earlier came over to inspect his lip. 

“Hmm… Just a little sting.” Bob mused. Nico narrowed his eyes at him. 

“Let’s sit you down and throw a spider at your face and see if it feels like a little sting to you, yeah?” Nico snarled. Bob clapped his shoulder. 

“They’re not dangerous, Nico. You’re absolutely fine. Your lip might tingle for a bit but you’re all good.” Bob confirmed before moving off. 

“Thanks Bob,” Dec called before turning his attention back to Nico who was still gingerly touching his lip. “Well, Nico, since the spider didn’t enter your mouth you have the option to have another go.” 

“No thank you.” Nico said, shaking his head. He’d tried and there was no way he was risking another ‘little sting’. Little sting his arse. Daniel sighed in relief; if Nico didn’t do it he didn’t have to do it to even the scores. 

“Ok, that means the Daniel, you have a chance to take the lead and win here.” Ant said, turning to the Australian. Daniel shook his head confidently. 

“Nope.”

“You don’t even want to try?”

“Not if it’s going to sting me.”

“So you’re passing on this round?”

“Yes. I’m passing.” Daniel nodded. 

“With that in mind the scores still sit at four each which means we have to go to our tie breaker round.” Dec said. Nico sat forwards. He was now determined to get those stars again. Two rangers appeared with glass mugs filled with a lucid green substance and placed one in front of each driver. “This is Bug in a Mug. It is a cocktail of blended crickets and mealworms.” 

“At least the crickets aren’t living.” Daniel mused, looking down at what he believed he was about to have to consume. Nico smiled at him. 

“Whichever driver drinks the entire cocktail first and shows us his empty mouth will win the stars from the trial.” Ant finished. Both Nico and Daniel picked up their mugs. “Best of luck.”

“Good luck, mate.” Daniel said, moving his mug forwards. Nico clinked them together. 

“May the best man win.” Nico smiled. They both waited for the klaxon and as soon as it sounded they both began to pour the putrid liquid down their throats. Daniel choked a little on his first mouthful which left him to play catch up to Nico who was steaming ahead. Nico didn’t stop. He just kept swallowing. In a desperate attempt to not let the flavour burn through he kept going until there was nothing left to swallow. With heavy satisfaction he slammed his mug on the table and opened his mouth. Daniel’s glass came down a second after Nico’s.

“Congratulations, Nico. You have won the head to head.” Dec declared. And Nico felt the smile spread on his face. He reached his hand across the table to Daniel but Daniel got up and hugged him instead. Because what they had both achieved was a force to be reckoned with. They both felt like they could do anything right now. Both drivers beamed at each other. “But the question is who did the camp think would win.” Both Nico and Daniel frowned at Dec, both having forgotten that only one of them gets to go to camp. Nico swallowed dryly, hoping it was him just so they could get the stars to camp but also hoping they had picked Daniel because he felt Daniel deserved to go back after his herculean efforts. 

“I can tell you that the camp believed…” The stupid dramatic pause dragged across Nico’s skin. Why couldn’t they just say it? Daniel closed his eyes. “That Nico would win todays challenge. So congratulations again, Nico. You may head straight into camp.” 

“With the meals?”

“Yes, with all ten meals.”

“And what about Dan?” Nico pressed as the Australian sighed, giving a weaker version of the beam that usually sat on his face. 

“Daniel will have to stay here until further instructions are given.” Ant said and Daniel nodded. “Well done to both you. You may leave now to your respective residence.” Both of the presenters shook each drivers hands and let them leave, Nico leading Daniel out the way they had come in. At the end of the short pathway, Daniel was told to go right whereas Nico was told to go left.

“See you soon?” Nico asked, pulling Daniel into a hug. Daniel just nodded. 

“Hope so.”

“I’ll keep some food warm for you.” Nico promised. Daniel smiled at him as they fell out of their hug. 

“I’m not so sure it works like that, mate.”

“You’ll be fine. Just remember who got you through the cricket bit.” Nico said with a soothing pat on the arm. Daniel knew he was referencing Jev and gave Nico a small smile in return as he headed back towards the Outback Factory, leaving Nico standing alone. 

“It was nice to win, yes, especially because that means I’m bringing the food to camp tonight and Dan and I worked hard to get that yesterday. It’s a bit hollow though because we both tried really hard and I feel like he deserves to come into camp tonight because he took some big steps forwards in terms of fighting fears today. Everyone knows he’s not a big fan of crickets and to achieve what he has is amazing. It’s a shame to not be able to go in together but I'm sure we will see him soon enough.” Nico smiled at the interviewer as she thanked him and pointed him in the direction of the main camp. Nico took a moment to catch his breath, feeling a tingle of nerves shoot through him. This was it. He was about to enter the camp.

“It’s a bit hard when you loose but Nico did a fantastic job and I’m glad he gets to go in tonight because he takes the food with him and that’s really what counts. And Nico did a lot of the work yesterday for those ten stars so I’m happy for him. God knows what you’ve got in for me next. As long as I don’t have to eat anything I think I should be able to manage just fine but we’ll see.” Daniel beamed before heading back to where Nico and he had slept last night. 

\- - -

“Where will they sleep?” Felipe mused. Mark and Fernando turned to face him. 

“What do you mean?” Mark asked as Fernando sat up. Mark had been absent-mindedly combing his fingers through his hair and was completely unaware that Romain was glaring over at them. 

“Nico.”

“Yes?” Nico asked, turning from his leaf-card game with Jenson and Sergio. Felipe rolled his eyes. 

“Other Nico.” Felipe corrected. 

“I’m sure we agreed to address you as Britney…” Jenson smiled, nudging Nico’s arm with his shoulder.

“I’d prefer you to call me Rosberg.” Nico seethed. 

“Not a problem with me…” Lewis muttered to the sun. Felipe shook his head. 

“So where is he going to sleep?”

“Who?” Sebastian asked, appearing from the creak just having washed up the food trays. Felipe dropped his head in his hands. 

“God, give me strength.” He muttered, causing Fernando to smile. 

“Nico Hookenburg.” Fernando grinned. Mark smiled down at him. 

“Hulkenburg.” Mark corrected. Fernando frowned.

“Is what I say, no?”

“Leave off it, you know he can’t say it right.” Lewis sighed from his position lying on a log opposite them. Mark ignored him. 

“With a ‘U’ not an ‘O’” Mark smiled. Fernando blushed a little. 

“So… Sleeping? Are we putting him on the floor?” Felipe asked, trying desperately to revert to his original point. 

“That’s a bit mean, Felipe.” Romain commented, forcing himself in between Fernando and Mark. Fernando tried desperately not to laugh as Mark frowned at the Frenchman. 

“Do not want to do this but no one has any other suggestions.” Felipe sent back, already feeling exasperated with the conversation. 

“Felipe has a point though,” Jenson said thoughtfully. Fernando didn’t fail to notice how Nico moved closer to him, leaning forwards slightly as if to catch the Brit’s every word. “We’ve only got ten beds.”

“Five beds. Five death traps.” Lewis commented. Everyone ignored him. 

“Could we put some together?” Sergio tried, looking around at the ties of Romain and his hammocks. 

“Do not mind sharing.” Fernando shrugged. 

“Definitely not a solution.” Romain shot at him.

“Do you have a better idea?” Fernando challenged. Romain had no answer. “Is fine. I will share and Nico can have my hammock.”

“But I have a bed. Why would I want your hammock?” Nico scoffed. Fernando rolled his eyes at him. 

“Hulkenburg, Britney. Try to keep up.” Jenson teased. 

“Fernando should share with someone with a bed. More stable. For sure, the hammocks may not hold.” Felipe commented, nodding his head. Romain glared at Mark but Mark happily ignored him. 

“He can share with me.” Mark said, trying not to sound as ecstatic as he was. At that point Kimi emerged around the fire holding a laminate and a key. He dropped them in Fernando lap. 

“Share in there.” Kimi muttered, moving directly over to Seb. Fernando frowned down at the laminate and read it to himself. Romain lent back and read over his shoulder. 

“Am sure the idea is you announce these things.” Seb teased as Kimi sat next to him. Kimi just shrugged, resting his head back and closing his eyes. 

“What does it say?” Sergio asked as Romain sighed, looking defeated. 

“Campmates,” Mark read as Fernando passed the laminate to him keeping the key tightly in his hand. “As you are about to get two new additions to you camp, the tree house has been opened. Use this key to get inside and decide between yourselves which two campmates will move in.” Jenson’s eyes sparkled. 

“The tree house is open?”

“It will be when Fernando opens it with the key.” Romain muttered. 

“Why does Fernando get the key?” Nico asked. 

“They want to share, let them share.” Kimi said pointing between Mark and Fernando. Neither of the highlighted two said anything. Romain got up. 

“May I have a word?” He asked Kimi. Kimi shook his head.

“I don’t care as long as you let me play on the slide.” Jenson declared. Mark laughed at him. 

“Slide?”

“That’s how you get down.” Jenson beamed. Mark shook his head. 

“Does anyone have a problem with Mark and Fernando taking the tree house?” Seb asked with a hint of jealousy in his voice. It wasn’t very obvious and Kimi squeezed his hip in consolation. 

“For sure, this will give us a bed and a hammock for Nico and Dan.” Felipe nodded. 

“So we’re all agreed?” Mark asked. Everyone nodded much to Fernando’s relief. Mark held his hand out to him as he got to his feet. “Let’s go and find out what we’ve got ourselves into, eh?” He smiled. Fernando nodded, taking his hand and letting Mark pull him up. He was sad when Mark let his hand go but their ‘distance dash’ wasn’t until dinner. Fernando collected his backpack and followed Mark, the key still clutched tightly in his hand. Pretty much everyone but Kimi and Lewis followed them towards the gate, wanting to know what was hiding behind it. Fernando unlocked the padlock with a satisfying click and hung it on the provided hook with the key. Jenson dashed up in front of them and waved at them from a balcony that hung out over the camp.

“Hey!” He yelled excitedly. Fernando and Mark let everyone else run up ahead of them so they could take each other’s hand as they ascended the stairs. Felipe was sitting on the beds, comparing them to what he had down in camp. 

“Is not so different.” He mused to Sergio who was mimicking his actions. Nico stood close to Jenson, talking about something in a quiet voice. Romain was laughing uncontrollably having seen Seb fall down the exit slide. 

“Found your slide, Jenson!” Sebastian called from the bottom. Everyone began laughing as they moved out onto the balcony to see Seb and try out the slide. Fernando and Mark moved back into the little room. 

“Which one do you want then?” Mark asked, pointing to the two beds on either side of the room. Fernando considered them for a moment before passing Mark his bag and sliding the one from the right across until it hit the side of the other bed. Fernando straightened up, brushing his hands together. He pointed at the two beds together. 

“That one.” He smiled. Mark was incredibly tempted to kiss him. Just as he brushed the hair out of Fernando’s face, removing his hat, Jenson joined them. 

“I’m not interrupting, am I?” Jenson teased as Mark’s hand fell away from Fernando’s face. 

“Not at all.” Mark said softly. 

“Doing a bit of redecorating I see.” Jenson smiled knowingly. Mark rolled his eyes. “Nico’s just turned up.” Jenson explained before leaving the room. Mark and Fernando looked at each other before following the Brit out and down the slide. They caught up to Jenson quickly. 

“Is more convenient with the beds like this. More space.” Fernando tried to justify. Jenson just smiled at him. 

“Uh huh.” He grinned. 

“Don’t bother Fer, he’s got a filthy mind.” Mark jested, wrapping his arm around Fernando’s shoulders. 

“Just remember you’re not that far away.” Jenson baited as they arrived by the fire. Everyone was looking towards the entrance as Nico Hulkenburg descended into the camp. They all waited patiently. 

“Ok…” Nico said, stopping in his journey forwards as he was met with ten staring pairs of eyes. “Errh… Hi?” It was odd to be faced with the top end of the grid. Some of these drivers he only knew the names of because they were some of the best drivers. A few he had never actually had a conversation with before. He wished Daniel had been allowed in with him. 

“Alright, lets stop staring at him like he’s a unicorn, yeah?” Mark smiled, moving forwards and shaking Nico’s hand. “How’s it going, mate?”

“Good, thanks.” Nico smiled. Everyone else moved forwards, offering their welcome as the group migrated to the fire where Nico offered his story of his time in the jungle so far. Everyone listened patiently, particularly interested when Nico started talking about life outside the jungle and how it was working to spark interest in Formula One just as Bernie had hoped it would. No one could believe he had actually had to put live bugs in his mouth to get here.

“I couldn’t have done that, man.” Lewis scoffed, shivering unpleasantly at the thought. Nico just smiled at him. 

“I could have guessed that.” Nico muttered under his breath. Lewis appeared to have not heard him. 

“So how does it work, food wise?” Jenson asked, sitting forwards. Nico Rosberg gave a small laugh, causing Jenson to frown at him. “What?”

“Is food the only thing on your mind?” Nico smiled. Jenson sat up. 

“What’s on yours, Princess?” Jenson smirked, watching the flash of red dance across Nico’s face. Satisfied, he turned back to Hulkenberg. 

“It was best of five. Just like when you did the head to head trials when you were in two camps.” Nico explained, pointing at Mark and Kimi. Everyone nodded, indicating for him to continue. “We got four each and it went to a tie breaker.”

“And?” Felipe asked, his eyes wide in hope. 

“Very similar to the tie break Kimi and Mark had after the eating trial.” Nico continued.

“Thanks for bringing that up again.” Mark said in a bored tone. Fernando laughed at him. 

“Did you win?” Sergio asked. Nico let his smile creep onto his face. 

“I certainly did.” He flashed a smile, bowing as everyone applauded him. 

“So that’s ten meals for tonight?” Romain asked. Nico just nodded. 

“Well then congratulations, mate. Pick a bed.” Mark grinned, pointing to Fernando and his now vacant beds. Without a moment’s thought Nico took the hammock. Jenson, Nico Rosberg and Romain set about getting the fire ready for dinner as Nico Hulkenberg started setting up his bed. The rest of the campmates set about doing their own things, Mark and Fernando disappearing off to the tree house. 

“That’s funny…” Seb mused, leaning on the post at the end of Nico’s hammock. Nico frowned over at his fellow German as he tried to lay his sleeping bag flat. 

“What is?”

“You took the hammock.” Seb observed. 

“Right…?” Nico said, still confused. Seb held onto the end of his sleeping bag as Nico shook it into place. 

“Thought you would have taken the bed.”

“Dan can have it.” Nico sighed as he hung his bag on the post by Seb’s arm. Seb just nodded. 

“So where did he go?” Seb asked as Nico fell back into his hammock. 

“I don’t know. He went right and I went left.” Seb sat down beside him, his face frowned in thought. 

“Weird…”

“What?”

“Well, where could they have taken him? Maybe the other camp but that seems too… Too nice?” Nico punched his pillow into shape before resting back on it and tipping his hat over his eyes. 

“Beats me.” Nico lied; he really didn’t want to think about Daniel having to return to the Outback Factory alone. 

\- - -

“Now?”

“It’s the best time. We’ll offer to do the washing up.” Mark muttered. Everyone was happily content with the food Nico had won. Jenson was stacking the trays readying them to be washed. 

“But tonight is Felipe and Lewis’ job.” Fernando panicked. If they suddenly tried to take over the responsibility then people would get suspicious. It would attract attention they didn’t want or need. Romain was already sceptical about them sharing the tree house. Mark patted Fernando’s thigh.

“It’s fine. You wanted to do this, Fernando.”

“I know.”

“Right. Then lets do this.” Mark said confidently. Fernando looked deep into his eyes before nodding with a sigh. Mark got to his feet, pulling Fernando up and keeping their hands linked. Seb nudged Kimi. 

“They’re going.” Seb whispered. Kimi looked over in the direction of Seb’s gaze and gave a short nod. 

“Lewis! Get your arse out of bed!” Jenson called, placing the trays by the edge of the fire. Mark led Fernando over to him. 

“Are they being obvious enough?” Seb asked, frowning as Mark used his body to shield Fernando and his hands. Kimi shrugged. 

“Lewis!” Jenson yelled again. 

“Anything we can do to help?” Mark asked. Jenson got to his feet. 

“Yeah, get Lewis off his lazy arse.” Jenson moaned. Fernando frowned. 

“Huh?” The Spaniard asked. Jenson turned to face him. 

“Have you seen Lewis do anything but lying on that fucking bed since he got here?” Jenson seethed. Mark patted his shoulder. 

“Calm down, I guess he’s just-”

“-Felipe?” Lewis called, heading back into camp with a laminate in his hands. Jenson advanced on him. 

“It’s your turn to wash up, Lewis.” Jenson barked. Lewis frowned at him. 

“No can do. Find someone else.” Lewis brushed off, turning to Felipe as he headed over. Jenson grabbed his shoulder. 

“You’re not passing this off to someone else again.”

“Calm down, Jense,” Lewis frowned, pushing Jenson’s hand off him. “Felipe and I have a trial.”

“No.” Felipe said, folding his arms. Lewis turned his frown on him. 

“What?”

“Am not doing trial with you. For sure, find someone else.” Felipe spat. Lewis shook his head. 

“You don’t get to choose. It’s picked for us.” Lewis explained, handing over the laminate. Felipe threw it back at Lewis after reading it. 

“And once again you get out of doing something. Well fucking done, Lewis.” Jenson snapped, heading back towards the fire. Lewis gapped after him. 

“It’s alright, Jense. Fernando and I will wash up.” Mark suggested, pushing the smile from his face. That couldn’t have gone any better. He squeezed Fernando’s hand reassuringly. 

“Hey, man, I didn’t ask for this.” Lewis spat in Jenson’s direction. Jenson lifted the trays into his arms. 

“Of course not.” Jenson snarled sarcastically. He absent-mindedly dropped the trays into Mark’s arms, forcing the Australian to let go of Fernando in an attempt to not drop them. 

“Do that count as void?” Seb asked. Kimi shushed him.

“Stop with these questions.” Kimi chastened.

“Jenson-”

“-Let us go, yes? Get this over with quickly.” Felipe grumbled, pulling on Lewis’ arm. Lewis pulled from his hold as Mark handed half the trays to Fernando, tucking the rest under his arm and taking the Spaniard’s hand again. 

“Wait.” Lewis shot at Felipe. He turned to Jenson. “What is your problem?”

“My problem is you.” Jenson barked. Lewis frowned deeper. 

“I don’t-”

“-Have your domestic later.” Felipe scowled, pulling Lewis out of the camp. Nico Rosberg was by Jenson’s side instantly as they vacated camp. 

“I told you to leave it.” Nico said softly to Jenson. Jenson shook his head. 

“One of you is telling me what he did.” Jenson snarled. Nico swallowed nervously as Mark and Fernando headed down to the creak. Romain couldn’t believe it. He had them red handed. 

“Mark?” He called, forcing the Australian to stop on the edge of camp, only just still in the sight line of everyone. Seb grabbed Kimi’s wrist, sitting forwards. This could be it. It could be all over. Mark’s stomach hit the floor as he looked over at Romain. Romain placed a crazed smile on his lips that made everyone feel uneasy. “I just-”

“-Romain?” Sergio called. The Frenchman turned, frowning, to see the Mexican standing with the ties of his hammock in his hands. “Can you give me a hand?” Romain turned back to where Fernando and Mark had been but they had gone. Probably down to the creak. And they wouldn’t risk that again, would they? Romain didn’t know, but he knew he was pissed at Sergio for ruining his moment. Seb fell back beside Kimi, exasperating sadly. Kimi just chuckled at him. 

“What?” Seb asked. Kimi shook his head, still smiling. 

“You care too much.”

“But they didn’t do it right. They stopped. And they got caught!” Seb explained in a lowered voice. Kimi shook his head. 

“They do what we ask. We have to give them that.” Kimi said. 

“But-”

“-Rules were vague.” Kimi said, getting to his feet. Seb looked up at him sadly. Blocking him from the rest of the camp Kimi placed a soft hand on Seb’s cheek. “Do not worry. Now we take this game to the next level.” Kimi smirked. Seb felt a buzz of excitement flood through him. 

“You said you would help me.” Sergio muttered as Romain tied one end of his bed back up. Romain frowned at him. 

“What?”

“With the Nico-bag thing. You said you would help me and I would help you.”

“So?” Romain spat. Fat lot of help you were just then…

“So… I need your help.” Sergio whispered, crouching next to Romain. Romain continued to frown at him. 

“With what?”

“I know what’s in his bag.” Sergio said. 

“So why do you need my help?”

“Because so does Lewis.”

\- - 

“…I mean, you’d think I do nothing the way he was going on!” Lewis ranted as Felipe led him down the path. It was late and the light was low. They only knew where they were going due to the fire torches taking them along the path from camp. 

“You do not do anything…” Felipe muttered under his breath, pushing the greenery out of the way. 

“It’s not my fault we’ve all been restricted to camp. There is only so much you can do around that place.” Lewis continued. 

“Do not think I am the best person for your rant.” Felipe said as they approached a clearing. Lewis grabbed his shoulder. 

“Great. So this means you think I do jack shit as well?” Lewis demanded. Felipe sighed. 

“We have trial to do.”

“That’s a yes.” Lewis sighed moodily. Felipe ran a hand through his hair.

“Jenson has been acting strange all day. For sure, you could do more around camp, but I think something else bothers him and he is taking this out on you.” Felipe explain. Lewis nodded slowly. 

“Then what do I do?”

“Do I look like Yoda?” Felipe laughed. Lewis rolled his eyes as Felipe clapped his shoulder. “We go and win the treat for the camp and everyone forgets, yes?” Felipe suggested. 

What they weren’t ready for was to find Daniel sat in a cage next to a massive crossword puzzle. 

“Hi.” Daniel smiled softly, waving at them. Lewis was completely confused. 

“Hi?” He returned the wave, making Daniel laugh. 

“You know, I seriously thought I was in here all night.” Daniel explained. Felipe moved over to the door. 

“How long have you been here?” Lewis asked, still rooted to the spot. Daniel looked up at the sky. 

“Four hours at least.” Daniel shrugged. Felipe shook the bars of the door. “Oh, yeah that doesn’t work.”

“Huh?” The Brazilian frowned. Daniel smiled at him. 

“I did try.” Daniel said. Felipe let go of the bars. “You have instructions.” Daniel explained, pointing to the chalkboard across the clearing. Lewis noted how Daniel had moved the bed he was sitting on across the small cage so he could rest his arms on the bars. He couldn’t think of anything worse than being locked in a cage for four hours. 

Felipe moved over to the chalkboard. It had twenty questions on it, all about Daniel, and there was a box of letters just to its left. Beside the large crossword board was a smaller strip with ten slots in it. In the main crossword board there were ten yellow squares. It was clear that the ten letters would spell another word that would open the door to Daniel’s cage. That’s how the instructions explained it. 

“We have to answer questions about Dan?” Lewis asked as Felipe explained. 

“Will be easy.” Felipe said, moving over to the chalkboard and reading the first question. 

“How?”

“The man with all the answers is right there.” Felipe said, pointing to Daniel and not looking away from the board. Daniel just waved at Lewis again. 

“Hey.” He smiled. Lewis moved to Felipe’s side. 

“Alright, lets start with what we know.” Lewis suggested. They managed to get five of the questions unassisted: his surname, nationality, team, race number in 2013 and team for 2014. Then they got stuck. 

“You really don’t know me very well do you.” Daniel mused with his characteristic smile. Felipe felt a little bad. 

“Is best bonding activity then, yes?” Felipe suggested. Daniel just chuckled. 

“Alright, give me a question.” Daniel said, happy he could actually do something. Four hours of nothing was finally turning him stir crazy. 

“First race?” Lewis asked, holding an ‘E’ and a ‘S’ cube in his hands. 

“Britain, 2011.”

“So do we go for British or Britain?” Lewis asked. 

“British. No ‘S’ in Britain.” Felipe said, pointing out where ‘Toro Rosso’ crossed with the word they were about to fill in. Lewis set about putting the blocks in place as Felipe moved onto the next question. 

“Where were you born?”

“Perth.”

“Another gold letter, Lewis.” Felipe said, slotting the blocks into place. Lewis moved back to the chalkboard. 

“Which one?”

“R.”

“So that’s ‘R’, ‘O’ and ‘I’” Lewis mused. Daniel snapped his fingers. 

“Rio?” He teased. Lewis rolled his eyes. 

“Month you were born?” Lewis asked. 

“July.”

“First teammate?”

“Oh, shit…” Daniel squinted his eyes closed, thinking back. He should definitely remember this. Felipe frowned at him. 

“Come back to it. Mother’s name?” Felipe brushed passed Lewis. 

“Grace.” Daniel answered, still focussing on trying to remember his first teammate. “This is stupid.”

“It’s alright; you’ll remember.” Lewis smiled. This carried on for a few minutes until finally most of the board was full. They had three questions left but Daniel had got himself stuck on who his first teammate was. He was kicking himself internally. He should know this. It was only two years ago. His head was so full of Jev he couldn’t concentrate. Daniel hit the bars in annoyance. Felipe flinched at the sudden noise, dropping the letter cube in his hands. 

“Fuck sake…” Daniel muttered. 

“Ten letters.” Lewis repeated from his perched position on the table. “A ‘N-I-O’ at the end.”

“I can’t remember.” Daniel shot, loosing patience. 

“You can.”

“No, Lewis. I can’t. I just don’t know.” Daniel looked up at him sympathetically. “Trust me, it’s killing me more than it’s killing you.”

“Maybe we can work this out…” Felipe mused, looking across the board. “Driver you replace at HRT?”

“I don’t remember…” Daniel sighed, resting his head against the bars. Felipe turned to Lewis. 

“Go through the grid.”

“Huh?” The Brit replied, slightly confused. 

“Who was on the 2011 grid? Go through this.” Lewis closed his eyes, frowning slightly in concentration.

“Shit… Seb, Mark, Jenson, Me, Fernando, You, Kimi… No, Kimi wasn’t there in 2011. He came back in 2012, right?” Lewis looked between the other two drivers who nodded. “Ok, no Kimi… Michael, Nico – they were with Mercedes – errh-”

“-Rubens?” Felipe added. Lewis just shrugged. 

“There were twenty-four driers that year. How am I supposed to remember them all?”

“Who was at the bottom end of the grid?” Felipe pushed. Lewis folded his arms. 

“How should I know? You spent more time at the back of that grid than I did.” Lewis spat. 

“Was not good season for you either, Lewis. Had your fair share of time at the back.” Felipe seethed. 

“Which is why Ferrari have kept you next year?” Lewis snarled, hopping off the table. He advanced on Felipe. “Oh, wait…”

“Guys, come on, pack it in. Lets just finish this.” Daniel exasperated from his cage. Lewis glared over at him. 

“Without you being able to remember, Dan, that becomes a tiny bit hard.” Lewis shot sarcastically. Daniel rolled his eyes. 

“How many yellow letters do you have?” Daniel asked. Felipe let his eyes skim over the board. 

“Seven out of ten.”

“Well let’s see if we can work this out.” Daniel suggested. Lewis frowned at him. “Do you have a better idea?” Lewis just shook his head, helping Felipe move the letters to the strip. Daniel frowned over at the letters. ‘L’, ‘T’, ‘R’, ‘G’, ‘N’, ‘I’, ‘O’. There it sat again, taunting him. 

N-I-O.

“Any ideas?” Lewis snapped at Daniel. Daniel didn’t hear him, too focused on the last three letters. 

“This word could be anything.” Felipe commented, holding his chin in thought. Lewis rolled his eyes. 

“This went well. I’m glad we did this.” Lewis seethed. 

“Vitantonio…” Daniel muttered, his eyebrows lifting as the memory of the name hit him. Neither Felipe nor Lewis heard him. 

“Do not get sarcastic, Lewis.” Felipe shot back. Lewis frowned at him. 

“This isn’t my fault.”

“Never said it was.”

“Your tone implied it.”

“Am sorry? Can I not say things now in case my voice upset you?” Felipe barked. Lewis opened his mouth to retaliate but Daniel’s voice came out.

“Add an ‘A’.” Daniel instructed, pointing at the letters. Felipe and Lewis frowned over at him. 

“Sorry?”

“An ‘A’. The driver. My first teammate was Vitantonio Liuzzi. Your yellow square is four in. It’s an ‘A’.” Daniel smiled. Felipe moved to fill in the crossword, putting the ‘A’ straight into the strip. “And I replaced Karthikeyan.” 

“That gives us an ‘E’.” Felipe said as Lewis and he moved around with blocks again. 

“‘S’.” Lewis said. “You missed an ‘S’.”

“This is all?” Felipe asked, looking over the ten letters. Daniel nodded. 

“Now we’ve just got to work them out…” The Australian mused. Each driver simply looked at the letters, trying to arrange them in some kind of coherent order. A-T-R-E-G-S-N-L-O-I. Lewis exhaled in aggravation. 

“I’ve got no idea, man. These letters simply don’t make sense.”

“Do you reckon this word is associated with me too?” Daniel asked. Lewis shrugged. 

“Could be anything.” There was a moment of silence, maybe three seconds, before Felipe broke it. 

“Interlagos.” He muttered, his eyes flicking across the letters. Lewis frowned at him. 

“Sorry?” Felipe didn’t reply. He set about re-arranging the letters until they spelt out his home race. Silence crept around them as they all waited. The letters made sense but Lewis feared it was still wrong. Nothing was happening. Daniel frowned at the door. He had expected it to open. But nothing. Felipe’s posture deflated slightly. 

“Was sure…” A loud clunk made all three drivers jump out of their skin. Lewis and Felipe turned to Daniel who pushed on the door tentatively. It swung open with little effort and Daniel couldn’t stop the smile crashing onto his face. 

“Well done, Felipe!” Daniel laughed, pulling the Brazilian into a hug. Felipe smiled radiantly as Daniel caught Lewis’ hand, dragging him into a one-armed embrace. 

“Who knew, Interlagos, huh.” Lewis smiled, clapping Felipe’s shoulder. “No wonder we needed you on this trial.” 

“Alright, lets get back to camp. Have been waiting long enough.” Felipe said, ushering Daniel and Lewis away from the cage. Daniel took a deep breath before pulling his rucksack onto his back. He was heading into camp. 

This was the beginning. 

\- - -

When the three of them got back into camp only Fernando, Mark, Romain and Nico Hulkenberg could be found. Jenson had apparently taken Nico Rosberg to clean out the dunny whereas no one knew where Sebastian, Kimi or Sergio had gone. Romain had been extremely quiet as Nico handed Daniel some of the left over food they had saved for him. Daniel beamed at Nico. 

“You didn’t have to.” Daniel said. Nico shook his head. 

“You did the trial too. We both earned that food.”

“Thank you.” Daniel said, piercing his fork into the juicy meat that was fresh off the fire. Daniel couldn’t remember the last time he had eaten proper food, but this was much better than the beans and rice Nico and he had been provided with that morning. 

“So, how’s life in the jungle treating you then, mate?” Mark asked, taking a seat opposite Daniel, across the fire, with Fernando. Romain’s eyes were fixed on Fernando’s hands resting casually in his lap. 

“So far I have been locked in a small room full of critters, had some of the unfortunate bastards shoved in my mouth and been locked in a cage for four hours. If this is the V.I.P treatment I want my money back.” Daniel joked causing the lingering campmates to laugh. 

“I think I win with bugs in my mouth, Dan.” Mark smiled. Daniel saluted him with his fork. 

“No arguments here.” Daniel beamed. 

“Someone could have told me we had a visitor.” Jenson smiled, walking up from the creak. He clasped Daniel’s hand tightly as he smiled at the new camp member. “I see you’re getting a taste for the entertainment and cuisine.” Jenson jested. 

“This is the entertainment?” Daniel feigned shocked wonder causing the drivers around him to laugh again. 

“The very best.” Fernando grinned. 

“Where’s Seb got to?” Daniel mused, more focused on his food. “I thought he’d have been around, trying to beat you all at everything.” Fernando and Mark exchanged a look. 

“No idea. Think he said something about fire wood but this was an hour ago…” Romain muttered, eyes still focused on Fernando.

“He cannot have got far. Am sure Kimi is with him.” Felipe said, relaxing back against Kimi’s bed. Fernando and Mark exchanged another look but this time they both knew they were thinking the same thing. 

“So, Dan, Nico tells us you’ve been eating bugs.” Jenson smiled. 

“Not eating them exactly.” Daniel sighed contently, placing his now empty tray on the log beside him. He yawned widely stretching his arms back and settling comfortably on the wood. Jenson smiled sympathetically at him. 

“How about you catch us all up when we’re all here in the morning. Don’t want you to have to keep repeating yourself.” Jenson said, rubbing Daniel’s shoulder as he got to his feet. 

“Thanks.” Daniel smiled softly. 

“Let me show you your bed, Dan.” Nico offered, taking Daniel’s bag. 

“We will go too.” Fernando said, pulling Mark to his feet. Romain’s eyes flicked between the two of them. “Is late.”

“Yeah. God knows what’s in store for us tomorrow.” Mark sighed. 

“Maybe more campmates?” Lewis smirked, heading to his own bed. 

“If there are your moving to the floor, Hamilton.” Mark joked.

“I’m sure there’s room on the floor of the tree house.” Lewis smiled back. 

“Good night everyone.” Fernando said through a yawn, pulling on Mark’s sleeve. Jenson picked up Daniel’s discarded tray. 

“Night, Fernando.” Jenson smiled. “Don’t make too much noise.” He added in an undertone that only Mark heard properly. 

“Huh?” Fernando asked, confused. Mark ushered him away. 

“Get your mind out of the gutter, Jense.” Mark called back as Fernando and he headed for the stairs. Jenson turned to Romain and Felipe.

“I’ll get this washed up and then drag Britney and Sergio back. God knows what was so important they needed to talk right now…” Jenson mused, feeling that no one was really listening to him. Felipe looked like he was asleep and Romain was still glaring after Fernando and Mark. His eyes flicked to Lewis who was climbing into bed. But now wasn’t the time to pick a fight. He had the morning to force Lewis to actually do something productive around camp. 

It was just as Fernando and Mark reached the bottom of the stairs, Jenson was just leaving for the creak, Nico was helping Daniel unfold his sleeping bag, and Felipe was really just falling asleep that they all heard it. It could have been a bird or a kangaroo or some other nocturnal animal making a noise. But Romain, Jenson, Fernando and Mark all had a fairly good idea of what the noise was. 

Because it sounded like a moan of pleasure. 

“Yeah, they’re taking it to the next level.” Mark whispered in Fernando’s ear before leading him up into the tree house. Jenson’s mouth had dropped open in shock. Romain was completely confused. 

“Did you just hear that?” Daniel asked, frowning at the other drivers. Felipe had sat up, confused by the sound. 

“Yes. I hear this.” Felipe replied. Romain looked to Jenson. 

“We know was not-”

“-Probably just some kind of animal.” Jenson interrupted. Romain glared at him. 

“But if-”

“-It’s nothing to worry about. Just go to sleep.” Jenson pushed, staring deep into Romain’s eyes. Nico shrugged at Daniel, finishing off his bed as everyone seemed to accept Jenson’s explanation. Everyone except Romain. Because Romain would have assumed it was Fernando and Mark. But he could see Fernando and Mark. It couldn’t possibly be them. 

And that really only left two other people. 

\- -

Seb climbed into his bed trying to wipe the smirk off his face. But it wasn’t going anywhere. They had matched Fernando and Mark now. Made the game that much more risky. It had been enthralling. Seb kept replaying it in his head, mesmerized by the memory of the feeling. He could already hear Kimi snoring in his bed only a few yards from his own. Seb stared up at the stars, grinning. They had snuck back into camp when they were sure everyone was asleep. Kimi had even kissed him good night, sending a spill of red across his cheeks. Seb was elated. Nothing could burst his bubble. 

Or had he spoke too soon?

“What have you been up to, Sebastian?” Someone whispered in his ear. Seb froze, not knowing what to do. It could be anyone. Anyone could have seen him return to camp. Seb’s thoughts flew to Romain. Romain who was slowly becoming obsessed with Fernando and Mark. Romain who was sure to expose them before the end of this television show. He swallowed nervously. Maybe it was just Mark. Or Fernando. Maybe they were just here to let him know they understood the game was on the next level. But could anyone know where they had been? They had been careful, quiet…

Except from that moment where Seb physically couldn’t keep his mouth shut. 

“Seb…” The voice continued softly. Seb refused to react. “I think you have some explaining to do…” Seb turned to look at the face pressed so close to him. And he froze. 

How could Lewis possibly know?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said there was a lot to vote for :P
> 
> The next trial is Cavan Of Claws and only ONE driver will take part. Any one of the original ten may be voted for this trial (not Nico Hulkenberg or Daniel as they would not have been in camp for this vote).
> 
> There is also a 'Live' trial in the next part so I need you to vote for ONE other driver to take part in  Critter's Got Talent. This can be any of the twelve drivers. In this trial the ONE chosen driver will need the assistance of ONE other driver for a couple of the tasks. You may also vote for them if you wish but please make it clear as to who is the chosen driver for the trial. 
> 
> Finally, the drivers will go head to head in teams of three over the next few parts to try and win a Halfway Holiday. Three drivers will get a night of luxury whereas the other nine will spend the night on a Terror Bus. (I'll explain this more clearly in the next part). I thought about many ways in which to do this, but the easiest for me was to set up the teams and get you to vote for who you want to win. So, the teams are thus:
> 
> BLUE - Jenson, Fernando, Mark  
> PINK - Sebastian, Kimi, Romain  
> ORANGE - Nico H, Daniel, Sergio  
> PURPLE - Nico R, Lewis, Felipe
> 
> Please vote for the team colour that you would like to WIN. 
> 
> VOTING FORMATS:  
> Caven - Hamilton  
> Live - Fernando (Nico H)  
> Halfway Holiday - Blue  
> *Please note, if you are voting for one of the Nicos please put their surname initial at the end : )
> 
> As long as your voting is clear do not worry about it being exactly to my formats.
> 
> All voting will closed at 9:00pm UK time on the 29th May.
> 
> Thank you for reading and voting. I hope you still are enjoying this fic.


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